Participants: Jill Morikone
Series Code: HLFT
Program Code: HLFT000008A
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00:25 Hello and welcome to "Heartlift."
00:27 I'm Jill Morikone, and I'm so glad 00:29 you have joined us today. 00:31 We're on a journey toward hope, toward healing, 00:34 toward the transformation that the Lord Jesus Christ 00:37 wants to work in your life and in mine 00:40 as woman of God, as his daughters. 00:44 If you're just joining us for the first time, 00:46 we began with several programs on forgiveness, 00:49 the forgiveness that the Lord Jesus Christ 00:51 wants to extend to us. 00:53 He wants to pour into us, so that we can in turn 00:56 extend it to someone else. 00:58 The last couple programs dealt with fear 01:01 and how God wants to break 01:03 asunder the bands of the wicked one. 01:07 Today, we're beginning a journey, several programs, 01:11 dealing with sadness, pain and loss. 01:15 And how God says, 01:16 "You don't have to stay stuck in that. 01:18 You don't have to be mired in that clay. 01:21 I can set you free. 01:23 I can turn your pain, your sorrow into joy." 01:27 In fact, our scripture talks about that. 01:30 Psalm 30:5, Psalm 30:5, it says, 01:36 "Weeping may endure for a night, 01:39 but joy comes in the morning." 01:42 Let's pray. 01:43 Father, we thank You, thank You that no matter 01:47 what we've experienced in life, 01:50 because of something Satan has thrown in our way, 01:53 because of the world of sin we live in. 01:55 Whatever pain my sisters at home are going through, 01:59 I thank you that you see, that you know, 02:03 that you care and understand and not only that, 02:07 you want to bring peace and even joy. 02:11 Right now we open up our hearts for Your healing 02:15 and we thank You in Jesus' name. 02:17 Amen. 02:19 I had my hands in the bread dough. 02:21 I was busily making bread. 02:24 And all of a sudden, the phone range. 02:27 Gingerly I picked it up because my hands were sticky 02:30 and I picked it up and I kind of cradled it 02:33 to my ear like this while my hands were dirty. 02:36 And I recognized the voice of our doctor. 02:42 Instantly in that moment when I heard his voice, 02:45 my mind traveled back through the years 02:49 on the journey that Greg and I had been traveling on. 02:54 You see, when we first got married, 02:57 when we first said I do, 03:01 our dream, our goal was to have a family. 03:04 I think most people would say that, 03:07 most couples when you get married, 03:09 pretty soon you think, after a couple of years, 03:13 our home is gonna be filled with laughter 03:15 and runny noises with childish prattle 03:19 and little kids, little kids to mould 03:23 and to train for the Lord Jesus. 03:27 However, our home remained quiet, 03:31 safe for the test laid flat on the bathroom countertop. 03:37 You know, the one with a little two pink lines 03:39 we're supposed to have, not pregnant again. 03:44 Why God? 03:45 We waited a year before going to the doctor 03:48 because that's what all the experts say. 03:51 You are not even considered infertile 03:54 until you can't conceive after one year of trying. 03:59 We waited a year, then we went to the doctor. 04:03 They did a round of tests and they said, 04:06 "We can't accurately diagnose what's going on. 04:09 You need to go to some specialist." 04:12 They send us up to St. Louis here in Southern Illinois. 04:15 If you want further medical help, 04:18 you go to St. Louis. 04:20 We went up to St. Louis. 04:22 We went to the fertility clinic there 04:24 and did more tests to ascertain why couldn't we have kids. 04:30 And all of a sudden, here I am, 04:33 my hands in the bread dough, 04:38 This might be the moment of reckoning. 04:40 And amazingly, it was. 04:42 He actually told me the news over the phone 04:45 instead of in the office. 04:47 He said, "Ma'am, 04:49 I'm so sorry but I have bad news for you. 04:52 And you and your husband are infertile." 04:55 He used words like rear, confusing 05:00 but all of that, all I heard was infertile. 05:03 There was a click in the dial tone 05:05 and I was left holding the phone. 05:07 You can't really pass that type of news out 05:10 over the phone, at least I couldn't. 05:12 Greg was at work and there was no way, 05:14 I can call him on the phone and say, hey, 05:15 we got the results, guess what, we can't have kids. 05:17 I couldn't do that. 05:19 And so, but I couldn't stand the house 05:21 and I just remember as if it were yesterday, 05:24 tears streaming down my face, 05:26 I ran out of the house down our gravel road. 05:32 We live in the country. 05:35 There is nice gravel road. 05:38 It was spring time when this happened 05:40 and the leaves were just unfurling 05:42 their spring time green. 05:44 The sky was a brilliant blue overhead 05:46 and the birds were singing. 05:48 But all I could feel, all I knew was a devastation 05:54 of our hopes and our dreams. 05:58 I cried and I talk to God and I cried and I walked. 06:01 And then pretty soon for that moment, 06:03 I sort of ran out of tears. 06:05 And then it was like, in that moment I felt 06:08 God speak to me, not a voice, but a whisper. 06:11 You know when the Holy Spirit speaks to you. 06:13 And he said, "Jill, my precious daughter, 06:17 count your blessings." 06:19 Had I heard right? 06:22 I wanted a little pity 06:24 and God was concerned with praise. 06:27 I had no idea what God was doing, 06:29 but I really wanted to follow Him. 06:32 And so I searched my mind, what are my blessings, 06:37 that tells you the frame of mind I was in 06:39 because I have the ton of blessings. 06:41 What are my blessings, and so I thought, 06:43 oh, I have a good husband. 06:45 So, God, I thank you for Greg. 06:47 I thank You that he is the man of God 06:48 and I began to thank God for Greg. 06:51 Then I said, God, thank You for my family, 06:54 thank You for my friends. 06:56 Thank You for ministry and church. 06:58 And then pretty soon my praise began to center 07:01 around God, His goodness, His faithfulness, His love. 07:08 You know what happened? 07:09 A change occurred at that moment in my heart. 07:14 I began to see the rainbow as it came out after the rain. 07:19 I could see the leaves. 07:20 I could feel the warmth of the sun on my face. 07:23 I could hear the birds singing again. 07:26 Now, that's not to say 07:28 that we didn't go through more battles with this grief. 07:33 But that is to say that in that moment, 07:36 God brought me relief. 07:39 I don't know what pain you're struggling with 07:43 in your life right now. 07:45 Maybe you're dealing with the loss of the loved one, 07:48 someone that you love more than your life itself 07:50 and the pain is so sharp, you can hardly breathe. 07:55 Maybe you're in the midst of the painful divorce 07:58 and it seems like death is preferable to life. 08:02 Maybe you can't even identify the source of your sorrow, 08:06 but it seems like you walk everyday 08:08 under a perpetual gray mist, 08:10 cloudy skies and you can't find the face of Jesus. 08:15 No matter when you feel you are right now, 08:19 God says I know, I hear, I love you and I understand 08:26 and He wants to bring deliverance. 08:28 Let's go to our self evaluation. 08:30 We want to do this at the start of each emotion 08:33 that we're dealing with here with Heartlift. 08:35 Our self evaluation is 08:36 how much does sorrow and sadness affect my life? 08:40 Number one. 08:42 Sorrow fills my every waking moment, 08:43 and haunts my dreams at night. 08:46 I'm depressed and wonder why God created me. 08:50 Life is a burden. 08:52 Maybe you are in that depressed state right now. 08:55 Number two. 08:56 I walk under a perpetual mist, 08:58 and just can't seem to find the sun. 09:01 I can't identify the source of my sorrow or my pain, 09:05 but every day feels gray and cloudy. 09:07 I just can't find the face of Jesus. 09:11 Number three. 09:12 I experience the normal ups and downs of everyday life. 09:16 Days when I feel happy and satisfied, 09:19 and other times when I feel sad, or a bit down. 09:23 And number four. 09:24 Joy fills my heart and even bubbles over. 09:28 I experienced the normal hurts and frustration of life, 09:32 but as soon as they arise, I surrender them to Jesus, 09:36 and He enables my soul to rise above my circumstances 09:40 to the realm of joy and peace. 09:42 I don't know where you feel you are in those descriptions. 09:45 Wherever you are, it's okay, because God says, 09:48 He came to turn our sorrow into joy. 09:54 We're going to look at two different 09:56 types of sorrow that we experience. 09:58 I think the first type is sorrow from loss. 10:02 There was a tightly-knit home. 10:05 All day had squabbles as most childhood kids do. 10:10 But as they grew up, somehow their bond deepened 10:13 and they became closer. 10:15 When they were adults, they became friends 10:18 with the radical new rabbi there in Israel. 10:21 His name was Jesus. 10:23 In fact, Jesus loved them so much 10:26 that he came often to their home, 10:28 two sisters and a brother. 10:30 He came often to their home and He visited with them. 10:35 I'm sure you know by now who we're talking about. 10:37 This is Mary and Martha and Lazarus. 10:41 And the Bible doesn't say what happened to Lazarus. 10:44 It just says that he became sick. 10:47 We don't know, did it begin with the cold, 10:50 then did he have a fever, what caused the sickness, 10:53 we have no idea? 10:54 But we do know at one point, 10:56 the sisters became very worried 10:59 and they sort of feared for his life, 11:01 so they send the message to Jesus. 11:03 I'm in John 11. 11:04 John 11, they send the message to Jesus in verse 3, 11:09 "Lord who you love, the man you love is sick." 11:12 And in verse 4 he says, when Jesus heard that, 11:16 the news that Lazarus was sick. 11:19 He said, "This sickness is not unto death 11:22 but for the glory of God that the Son of Man 11:25 might be glorified through it." 11:29 And amazingly, Jesus stayed. 11:32 Remember that, Jesus stayed, 11:34 He stayed where he was. 11:35 He didn't go to the home of Mary, 11:38 Martha and Lazarus although He loved them. 11:41 He didn't go to their home, He waited, 11:45 Lazarus died. 11:47 The sister grief, I'm sure was unimaginable 11:51 because they thought, we know someone 11:53 who could have healed him, 11:54 but now what can He do, Lazarus is dead. 11:57 And so they buried him. 11:59 Four days after the burial, Jesus shows up. 12:02 And you know what He does? 12:04 He brings Lazarus back to life. 12:08 you know, Jesus said in John 11:4, 12:11 "The sickness is not unto death, 12:12 but for the glory of God." 12:15 God was working all things out for good. 12:18 Even though Martha and Mary didn't know it at that time. 12:24 You see, if God had healed a sick Lazarus 12:27 that would have been a small miracle 12:29 and most certainly a blessing, 12:31 but when He raised the four days dead 12:34 Lazarus back to life, 12:37 the story of that miracle was unstoppable. 12:41 Maybe someone that you love is suffering 12:44 with disease right now and you're watching someone 12:47 that you love suffer know 12:49 that the Lord Jesus Christ is sitting beside you, 12:53 that He loves you, that His tears are even 12:57 mingling with yours. 12:59 Matthew 11:28, He says, 13:02 "Come to Me, all you who labor 13:04 and are heavy laden. I want to give you rest." 13:09 John 16:20, He says, 13:11 "I want to turn your sorrow into joy." 13:16 And then Deuteronomy 33, I'm jumping over here 13:19 because I can't quote it, Deuteronomy 33:27, 13:23 "The eternal God is your refuge, 13:25 and underneath are the everlasting arms." 13:28 The arms of Jesus can carry you through the pain, 13:33 through the sadness and those difficult points in your life. 13:38 And it says, "He would thrust out the enemy 13:40 from before you and say, 'Destroy." 13:44 'Maybe what you're dealing with, 13:46 the sorrow that you're dealing with 13:48 has nothing to do with disease or sickness or death. 13:51 Maybe it's the loss of a dream. 13:53 It's the loss of the job you always wanted 13:56 or the marriage you never had. 13:59 It's the loss of health you had always hoped for 14:02 or the money you never had, 14:05 the house you always wanted to live in 14:07 or the children you could never have. 14:10 In the midst of our infertility journey, 14:12 Greg wrote down a question that really stuck with me. 14:17 He said, "How do you let go of something you never had." 14:22 Now, this is true, not only for Greg and I, 14:24 for whatever dream you might have had 14:28 that is not being realized, that you can't achieve. 14:32 How do you let go off something you can have, 14:36 you never had. 14:38 We talked about sorrow from loss. 14:41 There is also sorrow from choice. 14:46 An anguish cry burst forth in the Sanhedrin's chambers. 14:52 You could hear the tinkle of silver as it was cast 14:55 at the feet of the high priest. 14:58 And Judas, one of the twelve apostles, 15:01 one of the men who betrayed the Son of God 15:03 and saying, "He is an innocent man, 15:07 let me return this silver." 15:09 We find that story in Matthew 27. 15:13 Matthew 27, we're gonna read verses 1 through 5. 15:17 "When morning come, all the chief priests 15:19 and elders of the people, they plotted against Jesus, 15:22 they wanted to put him to death. 15:24 And when they had bound him, they led him away, 15:26 and delivered him to Pontius Pilate, 15:28 the governor." 15:30 Then Judas, he is starting to feel a little bit of remorse. 15:35 "His betrayer, seeing that He had been condemned, 15:37 was remorseful and brought back the thirty pieces of silver 15:42 saying I have sinned by betraying innocent blood." 15:46 And they said, "Why do we care? 15:49 What is that to us? 15:51 You seeded that and so he threw down 15:53 the thirty pieces of silver and he went out 15:57 and he hanged himself. 15:59 I don't think Judas is sorrow for what he did was 16:03 because of a love for Jesus. 16:05 Neither was it from the conviction 16:07 that he himself had sold the Son of God, 16:10 his sorrow was the fact 16:12 that Jesus hadn't freed himself. 16:15 That Jesus hadn't set up 16:17 his earthy kingdom that his plans had gone awry, 16:22 that his conniving and greed had failed 16:24 to achieve his heart's desire. 16:27 I believe there is two ways 16:28 that we can experience sorrow from choice. 16:32 Sorrow from choice sounds a bit hard, doesn't it? 16:35 To me it does. But hear me out. 16:38 The first way experience sorrow 16:40 from choice is by the poor choices that we make. 16:44 Let me explain. 16:46 Galatians 6, Galatians 6:7, 8 16:51 is the law of sowing and reaping. 16:56 "Do not be deceived, God is not mocked, 16:58 whatever a man sows, that shall he also reap. 17:03 For he who sows to his flesh 17:05 will of the flesh reap corruption, 17:07 but he who sows to the Spirit 17:09 will of the Spirit reap life everlasting." 17:13 We reap what we sow. 17:16 That's a biblical principle. 17:17 We can sow negative emotions or negative feelings. 17:21 Maybe I can sow selfishness, 17:23 revenge, jealousy. 17:26 You know what I'm going to reap? 17:27 A bountiful harvest of broken relationships, 17:31 bitterness of soul, betrayal. 17:34 For we don't always sow emotions, 17:37 we can sow positive emotions, 17:40 not just negative. 17:44 Well, if you show, sowed love, kindness, 17:48 forgiveness, you could reap friendship, 17:52 peace and even joy, that's the emotions 17:57 that we can sow. 17:59 What if we sow decisions? 18:02 We might sow a bad decision. 18:04 I might say, I know this man is not godly, 18:08 but I'm going to change him 18:09 and he is going to come to Jesus 18:11 after we're married. 18:13 What going to happen? 18:15 You might reap a bitter, turbulent marriage. 18:18 Maybe even divorce. 18:21 Maybe you'll say, 18:22 you're so bad with financial decision 18:25 and you'll say I know I should not co-sign 18:28 for my friend but they're my friend, 18:32 they're not gonna default on the loan. 18:33 I know, I don't have the money if they do default 18:36 but I'll still co-sign anyway. 18:39 What's gonna happen? 18:40 At the very least 18:41 you're gonna reap some financial hardship 18:43 if your friend defaults on that loan. 18:47 What if we sow choices in entertainment? 18:49 And we say, I can watch anything, 18:52 I can do anything, 18:54 it doesn't matter because I'm strong in Jesus. 18:57 We might reap a severance or disconnect 19:01 in our walk with Jesus. 19:04 But sowing decisions works on the positive side as well. 19:08 We might choose a godly spouse 19:09 and reap a beautiful marriage 19:11 and an abundant happiness in this life 19:15 and in the life to come. 19:16 We might make wise financial choices 19:18 and reap financial blessings. 19:21 We might make discerning entertainment choices 19:24 and reap a closer, closer walk with Jesus. 19:29 Now, there is a biblical principal 19:32 at work here. 19:33 Remember Romans 8:28, God says, 19:37 "All things work together for good, 19:38 to those who love him, to those who are called 19:40 according to his purpose." 19:44 and you're saying, okay, Jill, there is no hope for me. 19:47 I sowed a bad decision, 19:49 there is nothing I can do about it. 19:52 That's not the case. 19:54 God says, "Come to Me right now 19:57 and He wan turn even your bad decision, 20:00 the situation you're in now, 20:02 He can turn that around for good. 20:06 That is the power of the gospel. 20:08 Joel 2:25, it says, "I will restore to you 20:15 the years that the locust has eaten, 20:18 the crawling locust, the chewing locust, 20:21 the consuming locust." 20:23 He really covers all those locusts. 20:24 But what he is saying is that even if we've made bad choices, 20:29 God can redeem our past. 20:32 You don't have to live today 20:35 and that guilt or condemnation 20:36 of what you've done in the past, 20:38 go to God, confess and know that from today, 20:42 He can work to restore your past. 20:46 I think there's two ways that we experience 20:48 sorrow from choice. 20:49 The first is in the choices that we make. 20:51 The second is in not responding to trials 20:54 and afflictions God's way. 20:58 Let me explain. 20:59 We all experience sorrow. 21:01 We all experience bitterness of heart. 21:03 We all experience times when we have grief, 21:08 but what do we do with it? 21:09 Do we choose to wallow in that, 21:12 even while it turns to self pity, 21:15 into bitterness of spirit 21:17 or do we choose to surrender in the midst of our pain 21:20 and allow God to pour His healing into our lives 21:25 and to turn our sorrow into joy. 21:28 I think sorry from loss 21:30 leads one of two different ways. 21:32 It can lead me closer to God. 21:34 Psalm 16:11, "You will show me the path of life: 21:38 in your presence is fullness of joy, 21:40 at your right hand are pleasures for ever more." 21:45 God, if I turn to God, if I surrender, 21:48 God can turn my sorrow into joy. 21:53 Perhaps, you have met women 21:56 who have been deeply hurt. 21:58 Women who have struggled in their own walk with God, 22:02 who have been hurt by death, by divorce, 22:05 by whatever, yet they still radiate joy and peace. 22:09 They still live for Jesus. 22:11 What has happened? 22:13 They've turned to God in their pain 22:16 and they allowed Him to comfort them 22:20 and they allowed Him to work in their lives. 22:25 2 Corinthians 1, 2 Corinthians 1:3, 22:30 "God says blessed be the Father 22:32 and God of our Lord Jesus Christ, 22:34 the Father of mercies and the God of all comfort, 22:37 who comforts us in our tribulation." 22:41 So that we in turn extend this comfort to someone else. 22:45 What does God say? 22:46 Of course, all things aren't good. 22:49 Of course, there's pain and there's sorrow, 22:51 but in the midst of that, if we turn to God, 22:54 if we allow Him to work in our hearts and lives, 22:59 He will pour His comfort into us, 23:01 so that we can extend that to someone else. 23:05 Sorrow from choice. 23:07 If we experience sorrow from loss, 23:10 we can either have it push us towards God 23:13 and toward fullness of joy 23:15 or we can choose to have it push us away from God. 23:20 Perhaps, you have met women 23:22 who maybe have been divorced for years, 23:24 yet their bitterness, their vindictive spirit, 23:27 their self pity is as strong as the day they were divorced. 23:32 They've indulged that spirit and it has grown 23:35 and taken route in their hearts. 23:38 No matter where you feel you are right now, 23:41 the Lord Jesus says, it doesn't matter 23:43 what you've done in the past, I can forgive and I can redeem 23:48 whatever you've done in the past. 23:50 It doesn't matter what pain you're experiencing right now, 23:54 He says, "Turn to Me 23:57 and I can turn your sorrow into joy." 24:01 Our next two programs, we want to look at the steps, 24:06 the keys the Lord Jesus Christ can take you and I on 24:10 to experience fullness of joy in His presence, 24:13 to experience peace. 24:15 Once again, to experience His joy. 24:19 We're gonna take a short break at this time 24:22 and when we come back, we're going to be discussing 24:25 a practical application, something you can do this week. |
Revised 2016-02-18