Participants: Jill Morikone
Series Code: HLFT
Program Code: HLFT000015A
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00:25 Hello, and welcome to Heart Lift.
00:26 I'm Jill Morikone, and I'm so glad that 00:29 you've joined us today. 00:30 We're on a journey toward hope, toward healing, 00:34 toward the transformation that the Lord Jesus wants to work 00:39 in your heart and in mine, as women, as daughters of God. 00:44 If you're just joining us today for the first time, 00:48 we're in the midst of our discussion 00:50 on the topic of purity. 00:52 Our last program we discussed purity from the aspect of 00:56 guarding my brother's heart, or dealing with 01:00 my brother in Christ. 01:01 We talked about two dangers, two things to beware of: 01:06 Beware of the unguarded heart. 01:09 Beware of that idleness, or day dreaming, 01:12 or compromising situations. 01:15 The second danger is beware of the discontented heart. 01:19 If you're married, beware of those comparisons that we could 01:23 make with someone else's husband. 01:26 Or beware of just being dissatisfied 01:28 with who God has given you. 01:30 If you're single, beware of that dissatisfaction of 01:35 wishing to be married. 01:36 Now of course, those things are natural and God given. 01:39 We're not saying that. 01:40 We're just saying, Take those feelings, take them to God 01:44 and allow Him to pour His love into your heart. 01:48 Our Scripture for today, as we discuss the forward heart, 01:53 our Scripture today, 1 John 2: 10, 1 John 2:10. The Bible says: 02:02 He who loves his brother abides in the light, 02:06 and there is no cause for stumbling in him. 02:10 Let's pray. Father, we come before You in the name of Jesus. 02:14 Thank You, Lord Jesus, for enabling us to 02:19 abide in Your light. 02:21 And we pray that as we do, as you teach us how to abide 02:26 in Jesus, that there would be no cause, no occasion for anyone 02:32 else to stumble because of us. 02:34 We pray right now, Lord, on this sensitive topic, 02:38 that You would especially give me Your words. 02:42 And I pray that we would be open to hearing 02:45 what's in Your Word. 02:47 And we thank You in the precious and holy name of Jesus, Amen. 02:51 There was a woman that, I'll call her Jane, 02:58 that's not her real name. 02:59 And if you are a Jane, this story does not apply to you. 03:03 I'll call her Jane. 03:05 I did not know her well, but I knew the man 03:09 in the story pretty well. 03:10 She was... ah, started going to church. 03:15 And she became infatuated, is the best word I know how to 03:19 describe it, with a certain man in the church; 03:21 the man that I knew. 03:23 And she was maybe 25 years younger than him, 03:28 and she lured him. 03:30 I don't know any other way how to put it except to say 03:34 that she lured him. 03:36 She used her charm, her charisma, her body, 03:41 any way that she could to get him. 03:44 Now this man had some money, and this is just my opinion, 03:49 I think she knew that. 03:50 And so she lured him, she got him. 03:55 And then you know what happened? she married him. 03:59 And it seemed like in the beginning of their marriage they 04:02 were fairly happy, but pretty soon she started using him, 04:07 and she used his money. 04:09 She used the land he had, and he had to sell it off. 04:12 She got him to sign the house over into her name. 04:16 She went through everything that he had. 04:21 Once she had used him, she kind of spit him out, 04:24 and divorced him. They were probably married for ten years. 04:30 And he recently passed away. 04:31 And now she gets his Social Security. 04:35 Even though they're divorced, in the state that they happen 04:39 to live in, after they were married ten years 04:41 she gets his Social Security. 04:43 Now to me that's kind of an extreme example of a woman 04:47 who uses her body, her charms, to reach out and to manipulate 04:52 somebody else, and in this case it was a man, to achieve her own 04:58 hearts desire to get what she wanted. 05:00 Today we're talking, the third danger that we're discussing 05:03 today, is the forward heart. 05:06 I think there's three ways that you and I can be careful, 05:11 can learn to guard, and to make sure we're not being forward. 05:16 And the first is in how we dress. 05:19 My Mom and Dad were coming home from work. 05:22 And they work together, and so they did. 05:26 They don't anymore, but they used to. 05:27 And my Dad had his business, and my Mom 05:30 worked in the business. 05:31 And driving home on the Interstate... 05:33 They live in Massachusetts. 05:35 ...there's a very high bridge. 05:37 The bridge is high. 05:39 There's a deep gorge underneath. 05:40 And there's a river underneath. 05:42 As they were driving home there was a tremendous thunder storm. 05:46 My Mom, telling me the story,... 05:48 This happened years ago. 05:50 But telling me this story, she said the rain was 05:52 coming down in sheets. 05:54 The windshield wipers, you know, they're on high. 05:56 You can hardly see. 05:58 And the lightening and the thunder was really close. 06:01 Just as they got on the highway to that bridge... 06:05 Remember it was high over the gorge? 06:08 All of a sudden my Mom said there was a white light, 06:12 like bright, like, I would say like lightening, 06:15 but that's what it was. 06:17 But there was a white light. 06:18 She said it just filled, like the whole car, flooded them. 06:22 And at the same time she saw the light, she said there was 06:25 the most terrible clap of thunder. 06:28 And then all of a sudden their car quit, and my Dad had to 06:33 struggle to get it steered to the side of the road. 06:38 You know what had happened? 06:40 Their car had been struck by lightening. 06:43 She said, Obviously the car, they were 06:45 protected in the metal; it went around. 06:47 The lightening blew out all four of the tires. 06:51 It came out the four rubber tires, and it fried completely 06:55 the electrical system of the car. 06:58 In fact, they never drove that car again. 07:00 It had to be towed, and they never used that car again. 07:04 Now my Dad is dressed for work. 07:06 He's in a white shirt, a tie and slacks, no suit coat, 07:11 but he was dressed up well. 07:13 And he thought, It's pouring down the rain outside, 07:15 I do not want to go outside and get covered in this. 07:20 So he took his tie off to protect it. 07:22 He put on his old coveralls. 07:25 He had them there in the back seat for some work 07:27 on the car, or something. 07:29 So he pulled on the coveralls over his other clothes, 07:32 and he stepped outside to try to flag down a passing 07:36 motorist to get help. 07:38 Now remember I said this happened years ago. 07:40 They didn't have a cell phone at that time. 07:42 So my Mom said my Dad's standing there in the rain, 07:47 in is old dirty coveralls, and car after car 07:53 passed without stopping. 07:55 So then he thought, maybe I don't look very safe. 07:58 I'm in these old dirty coveralls. 08:01 So what he did, he went in the car, he took off those old dirty 08:05 coveralls, and then he stepped back outside 08:09 in the pouring rain. 08:10 This time he's in the slacks that he had had 08:13 on underneath, and the shirt. 08:15 He said that car after car, nobody stopped. 08:22 In desperation he went in the car, he got his tie, 08:28 he put it on and knotted it, and stepped outside 08:33 again into the rain. 08:35 You know what happened? 08:36 The first two cars that passed, they stopped. 08:40 The first two cars stopped. 08:43 Now every time my Mom and Dad, you know when we relive this 08:47 story, I'm thankful, first of all, that God protected them 08:51 in the midst of that lightening storm. 08:52 And that's a good thing. 08:54 But every time we hear that story, we actually kind of 08:57 laugh, because it's kind of funny to think about my Dad 08:59 and those old coveralls, and then getting rid of them, 09:02 and going in and putting on a tie. 09:04 But you know what it shows? that how we dress is important. 09:09 I'm not talking at all about dress clothes, 09:12 wearing jackets, or wearing jeans. 09:14 That's not what we're talking about here. 09:16 We're not talking about dressy versus casual. 09:18 I know that dress, how we dress, is a touchy subject. 09:24 I'm well aware of the common thought, 09:27 thinking, thought process. 09:29 If my brother is struggling with something I'm wearing, 09:33 that's his fault; that's not mine. 09:36 You know Romans 8:1, Romans 8:1 says, There is therefore now 09:42 no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus. 09:46 If we stop right there, then that thinking would be accurate. 09:51 We could say, I'm in Jesus. 09:53 It doesn't matter. 09:55 I can wear what I want, and I can say what I want, 09:57 I can do what I want. 09:59 None of that matters. 10:00 But if you read the rest of the verse, Yes, it begins by saying, 10:06 There's no condemnation now to those who are in Christ Jesus. 10:09 But do you know what it says after that? 10:11 For those who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit. 10:17 I believe, Yes, God holds men accountable for their thoughts, 10:22 for their own issue with lust. 10:25 Absolutely! We're all accountable before God. 10:28 I believe that. But I believe as women we can 10:31 also be accountable. 10:34 We can also do our job to be responsible in this area. 10:38 I think God wants us to turn our hearts, our faces toward Him 10:45 so much that we receive from Him our identity. 10:51 Who am I? Who am I in Christ? 10:54 Is who am I identified by what the TV or 10:58 movies say I should be? the way my body ought to look? 11:03 the amount of skin I ought to show in order to be sexy 11:07 in the world's eyes? 11:08 Is that who I am? or who I am is really who am I in Jesus? 11:15 My worth, my self identity comes from Jesus. 11:19 And when He looks at you and me, He says, I love you! 11:22 You're beautiful! I made you! 11:26 I have a special garden, and a special hedge about you. 11:30 We get our identity, we get our worth, 11:32 we get our value from God alone. 11:35 Now I've been blessed with a husband, Greg, that chooses to 11:40 honor God with his eyes. 11:42 That's a rare commitment in today's world. 11:46 And how much I appreciate my husband's commitment. 11:50 Turn with me to Philippians 2. 11:53 If you don't have your Bible open, just jump over, 11:57 jot it down, and you can look it up later. 12:01 Paul speaking. 12:08 He says, Fulfill my joy by being like minded, having the same 12:14 love, being of one accord, of one mind. 12:18 That's verse 2. Then we have verse 3. 12:22 Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit; 12:26 but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other people 12:30 as better than ourselves. 12:34 What's that saying? 12:35 If I truly esteem someone else as better than myself, 12:40 then I'm going to care how my clothing choices effect 12:44 my brother's commitment to his wife, or effect my brother's 12:48 commitment to his future wife. 12:51 Now you might be saying, Jill, what am I to wear? 12:53 Only God can tell you that. 12:54 We are not getting into any discussion of that. 12:58 Because if we do that, I think that's judgment. 13:01 I think, Go to God, and in the quietness of your heart, 13:05 and just say, Is what I'm wearing pleasing to You, God? 13:09 Is what I'm wearing esteeming my brother? 13:12 If it is, wonderful! 13:15 If it's not, then be open to what God wants to tell you. 13:19 Only God can tell us how to dress. 13:21 You could have a dress up party. 13:23 You can invite your girlfriends, or ask your husband. 13:26 I do that with Greg. 13:27 What about this? And he'll say, Oh, I love that, Jilly. 13:30 And I'll say, That's not too, whatever? 13:32 Oh no, that's great. 13:33 Or he'll say, You know, I have a little caution 13:36 in my heart about that. Maybe don't. 13:38 And so I want to honor my husband 13:41 in addition to that as well. 13:42 First, how we dress. 13:44 Second way, we need to guard the forward 13:47 heart, is how we act. 13:49 Flirting is fun, and just being honest with you, 13:53 I've done way more than my share of it in my youthful days. 13:56 It's kind of how we laugh, and how we talk, and the twinkle 14:00 in the eye, and all of that type of stuff. 14:03 Mrs. Potiphar, Potiphar's wife, we talked about her 14:07 in the last program. 14:09 She's the one who seduced Joseph; tried to seduce. 14:14 We want to clarify that because initially Joseph said no, 14:18 and he was thrown in prison for his commitment to honoring God. 14:21 Mrs. Potiphar did more than flirt. 14:23 If you're familiar with the story, 14:25 you know she did more than that. 14:27 She came straight out and asked Joseph for sex. 14:31 She didn't try to be coy about it, or do this and that. 14:35 The Bible says in Genesis 39 she just said, Lie with me. 14:38 She just came straight out and asked. 14:40 Our society today, as women, it seems like we're free to be 14:46 liberated, free to be crass, and bold, and uninhibited. 14:51 It's so different from the calling God has on our 14:57 hearts, and on our lives. 14:59 We see that calling in 1 Peter 3:4, 1 Peter 3:4. 15:07 Now this is a whole section about Paul's council to wives, 15:12 and then he talks about council to husbands. 15:14 So there's plenty of council to husbands, but right now we're 15:18 just discussing women, because this is a woman's program. 15:24 He says, Don't let your adornment be from the outside. 15:29 Then he says, Rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, 15:34 with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and a quiet spirit. 15:39 I think, as woman, when we come before God and realize, 15:45 Who am I in Christ? 15:46 In Christ I am forgiven. 15:48 In Christ I am cleansed. 15:51 In Christ I am made new. 15:54 If anyone is in Christ, the old things have passed away, 15:58 behold all things have become new. 16:02 In Christ I don't have to hang on to any of that 16:05 junk from the past, because I am a new creation in Jesus. 16:09 In Christ I am loved. 16:12 In Christ I am wanted. 16:15 In Christ I am safe. 16:18 In Christ I am pure. 16:21 That's who you are in Jesus Christ. 16:24 Don't take any of this stuff and feel like we have to act, 16:27 or be, or dress a certain way in order to achieve approval. 16:33 We get that straight from the Father above. 16:38 3. How we talk. We talked about how we dress, then how we act, 16:45 what about how we talk? 16:48 Be careful with over sharing. 16:51 Too much openness in discussions in sharing with someone 16:55 of the opposite sex creates intimacy 16:58 where it doesn't belong. 17:00 Now vulnerability is a beautiful thing, if it's to my Father 17:04 in heaven, if it's to your spouse. 17:06 Vulnerability is wonderful. 17:08 Vulnerability is even good with some trusted Godly girlfriends, 17:12 or those accountability partners that we talked with. 17:15 However, with a man, that can be dangerous. 17:19 Learn to share with your husband, 17:23 or a trusted girlfriend, or a family member, 17:26 not your co-worker or the nice man you just met at church. 17:32 My girlfriend is really learning how to model 17:37 this, how to do this. 17:40 She grew up in a home where boundaries were not modeled. 17:45 And perhaps you experience this yourself. 17:50 Maybe you grew up in a home where the boundaries 17:53 were constantly violated. 17:55 They could have been violated physically, and you were abused 17:59 in some way through no choice of your own. 18:01 It was pushed upon you. 18:03 Maybe they weren't violated physically, 18:05 but they were violated emotionally, or verbally. 18:10 Maybe you didn't realize you had a choice, 18:12 and you could actually say no. 18:16 Maybe that was trained in you since childhood. 18:19 In my girlfriend's case, she grew up in a home with some 18:23 dysfunction, some pain, and so she never saw 18:30 boundaries being modeled. 18:32 She never saw them lived out, so for her it was hard to know, 18:37 What does this look like? 18:39 What am I supposed to do with this? 18:41 But now, as an adult, she's learning how to share, 18:48 what to share, how much to share, and probably the most 18:53 important, with whom to share. 18:56 That's key. It's important to learn boundaries. 18:59 And you might be saying, I don't think I have any boundaries. 19:02 I didn't even know how to get boundaries in my life. 19:05 I don't know how to put... 19:07 I don't even know what that looks like. 19:09 There's a fabulous book. 19:11 I like it. It's called Boundaries. 19:13 That's a good book. 19:14 You could get that. 19:16 But I think we can go to God, we can learn in community 19:19 as sisters, learning how to establish boundaries. 19:23 What boundaries are even supposed to look like. 19:26 Get in a mentorship with an older Godly woman, 19:29 or even a younger Godly woman who's Godly. That's the key. 19:33 And learn what boundaries are supposed to look like. 19:37 See the boundaries as they are modeled. 19:40 And my girlfriend is learning what's appropriate to say, 19:42 what's not appropriate to say, who to say it to, 19:46 and who not to say it to, and what to do with this 19:50 issue of over sharing. 19:53 When you share remember to share it with your husband, 19:56 with the trusted girlfriend, with a family member. 20:00 Not over sharing with someone of the opposite sex. 20:04 And go to God and ask Him to show you, 20:07 Who am I over sharing with, and what am I 20:10 over sharing about? 20:12 In addition, as well as over sharing, it's important also to 20:16 think about the content. 20:18 What are you actually talking about? 20:20 Or not even what you are talking about, 20:23 but what are you listening to? 20:25 I know in my own life this can be a battle for me, 20:28 because I might say, Well, I'm not going to say that, 20:31 but you know what I do? 20:32 I sit and listen to it. 20:34 I sit and hear it. 20:37 And sometimes, probably more often than I should, 20:42 I just, okay, I take it in. 20:46 I don't say anything. 20:47 I think, Well, if I am a good Christian I probably shouldn't 20:51 rock the boat, and I'll just sit here and listen to it. 20:54 But what if God says, No, I want you to stand up. 21:00 And that's something that, in my own life, I'm trying to learn. 21:04 When to say, Okay, that boundary is being crossed. 21:06 Maybe not with anything they're doing, but with something 21:09 they're telling me, or something they're sharing, 21:11 or something maybe sexual. 21:13 And say, No, you're not my husband. 21:15 I shouldn't be hearing about that. 21:17 I shouldn't be listening to that. 21:20 It's an important thing to learn. 21:22 I think as a society we're open. 21:27 Today's society, women and men are just free to be bold, 21:31 and crass, and uninhibited. 21:33 To me that's the key, uninhibited. 21:35 The Bible tells us in Matthew, remember when the disciples 21:38 were talking about what are the signs of the end of the world, 21:42 and what are the signs of Jesus' coming? 21:43 Remember one of those signs? 21:45 What was one of those signs? 21:47 He said, It's going to be men eating and drinking, 21:50 marrying and giving in marriage, and all of that stuff, 21:53 just like the licentiousness and the sin that existed 21:57 in this world at the time of the flood, at the time when Noah, 22:02 God had Noah build the ark. 22:04 It's interesting because now we see that again here at the end 22:09 of time, here right before Jesus is going to come, 22:13 we see that again. 22:15 You see sexual immorality on the rise. 22:19 We see homosexuality on the rise, or maybe not even 22:23 on the rise, but it is more prevalent. 22:26 It is definitely more accepted. 22:30 We see things that 50, 20, 10, 5 years ago 22:37 would not be accepted, would not be tolerated. 22:41 Things about how we dress. 22:43 I remember I was in Wal-Mart and there was someone at the 22:48 checkout counter, not the clerk behind the counter, 22:50 but it was a girl checking out. 22:52 And I've never, being honest, in my entire life 22:57 seen shorts that short. 22:59 Now I've seen short shorts. 23:01 I've seen a lot of short shorts. 23:03 But these she had cut to make them shorter than you can 23:05 actually make them in the store. 23:07 It was incredible! 23:08 I have never seen that in my whole life. 23:10 And I thought, she was beautiful, she was beautiful. 23:16 And I thought, Oh, look at, you know, look at whatever lies 23:24 Satan has in her heart, and in her life. 23:27 Maybe it's not even a lie. 23:29 Maybe it's just thinking, I want to be socially accepted. 23:33 Society does it. Everybody does it. 23:36 So therefore I should do it, too. 23:39 Because I want people to like me. 23:42 I want to be popular. I want to fit in. 23:45 Wherever you are in your walk with Jesus today, 23:50 God says, I want to purify you. 23:54 I want to work in your heart, in the forward heart. 23:59 I want to go through your closet. 24:02 I want to look at the stuff that you wear and say, 24:05 Okay, what is pleasing to God? 24:07 And then maybe, is there an outfit or two that 24:10 I should maybe get rid of? 24:12 Only God can tell you that. 24:15 We're not here to say, Do this, do that. 24:18 Only God can tell you that. 24:20 Look, go to God. How do I act? 24:23 How do I talk? Is there anything in my life that's 24:28 misrepresenting the character of Jesus? 24:32 Whatever it is, He wants to show us. 24:35 And in addition, He wants to change us. 24:39 I love that about our God. 24:42 We're going to take a short break right now. 24:44 We're going to do our practical application for this week. 24:48 And then our next program we'll be discussing the issue 24:53 of a boastful heart, or pride. 24:55 We'll be right back. |
Revised 2016-05-31