Pure Choices

Eeny Meeni Minie Mo - Catch A Spouse By The Toe

Three Angels Broadcasting Network

Program transcript

Participants: Pr. Joshua Nelson (Host), Jeanne Mogusu, Kean Baxter, Kimberly Pearson, Marquis Jackson

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Series Code: PC

Program Code: PC000020


00:01 The following program discusses sensitive issues.
00:03 Parents are cautioned that some material may be
00:05 too candid for younger children.
00:39 Hello and welcome to "Pure Choices."
00:41 I'm your host Pastor Joshua Nelson.
00:43 I'm so glad you decided to join us
00:45 because we have a good one for you today.
00:48 We're talking about how to get a mate
00:51 "Eenie, Meenie, Miney, Mo, Catch a Spouse by the Toe."
00:54 We're gonna talk about it how you're gonna do,
00:56 how you're gonna catch,
00:57 how you're gonna get somebody to marry you.
01:00 So before we go into the topic
01:01 I'm gonna introduce our panel for today.
01:04 We have my good friend, Jeanne Mogusu,
01:07 she is a graduating seminary student.
01:10 And actually she is the president of
01:11 the Black Student Association of the Seminary.
01:13 So happy have her here today.
01:15 We also have Pastor Marquis Jackson
01:18 who is the pastor in South Carolina,
01:21 the pastor of Berea and Maranatha,
01:24 Seventh-day Adventist Church.
01:25 Glad to have you here.
01:26 We also have Chaplain Kimberley Pearson,
01:30 who is the Assistant Chaplain at Oakwood University.
01:33 Good friend of mine.
01:34 And we also have Kean Baxter, yes, who is also a--
01:38 he graduated already from the seminary,
01:40 a very educated young brother.
01:41 So we have a good panel today.
01:42 We are gonna get into this subject
01:44 and before we really talk about it,
01:45 I want to read this letter that was sent in
01:49 by a young individual,
01:51 and we want to read
01:52 what their question or scenario,
01:54 what their question is.
01:56 Okay, so let's hear what it says here.
01:57 It says, "I'm a freshman in college
02:00 and I've only dated one guy.
02:02 I'm told how pretty I am all the time,
02:05 but for some reason guys don't really
02:07 seem to be interested in me.
02:09 I don't think I'm ugly.
02:10 I do think there has to be something wrong with me though.
02:13 How do I get guys notice me without dressing skimpy
02:16 and overdoing it on the makeup and crazy hairstyles?
02:19 I want to get guys' attention
02:20 without doing these things that are just not me.
02:24 What should I do?"
02:25 So she's in need,
02:28 she wants to know how to get that mate.
02:30 So what would you all say to her?
02:33 One thing I will say is as a lady, your identity,
02:36 when you are comfortable who you are in yourself
02:39 that eventually will naturally pull.
02:41 It could be even good that you don't have
02:43 a whole bunch of guys trying to come after you
02:44 because if they started coming after you,
02:46 then it could start causing to have
02:48 different perspectives looking at different people.
02:50 But God will set someone in store for you.
02:54 But continue to be confident in yourself
02:56 and just rest in the Lord and just wait till He brings
02:58 what is best and suitable for you.
03:00 Okay.
03:02 Jeanne, as a woman,
03:03 what kind of words of advice you can give to her?
03:06 Well, first of all I would like to comment her
03:08 for not trying to get the men in, you know,
03:14 more traditional ways trying to dress skimpy.
03:17 Those are not the kind of people
03:18 that you want to attract.
03:19 You want to attract for a husband,
03:21 a very serious human being.
03:23 So if he is attracted to you
03:25 because you are dressing skimpy,
03:27 I would say that is definitely not a husband material.
03:31 You want someone to fall in love with you
03:33 for who you are--
03:34 the essence of yourself of,
03:36 you know, who you are and not just because you,
03:38 you know, you dress skimpy or you look good physically.
03:41 Because those things wear off,
03:42 and you want someone for a long period of time.
03:46 And I'll also tell her, you know,
03:48 don't be too attached to the idea of
03:52 you want to have someone.
03:54 You know, you want to have your essence,
03:56 your value placed in much more than
03:59 just having someone next to you.
04:01 Yes. Okay.
04:02 That makes sense. And another woman here.
04:04 I'm gonna say, I think what Jeanne said is
04:05 so important that I think sometimes as women,
04:09 we attach our identity into having a man.
04:12 And, I think, society, kind of, puts that on us as well that,
04:16 you know, until you have a man, until you have a husband
04:18 you're not really a woman
04:20 or if you don't have someone, something is wrong with you.
04:22 But as a man it's okay not to have--
04:24 Exactly. A wife.
04:25 It's cool, right. It's cool.
04:26 And so what I hear in that letter is that
04:27 she really wants to in a relationship.
04:29 I would ask her why.
04:31 What is the desire behind wanting to be in a relationship
04:34 and does she value herself outside of the relationship?
04:37 When we look at creation, Adam and Eve,
04:39 both had individual encounters with God
04:42 before they were brought together as a couple.
04:46 So has she had an encounter with God?
04:47 What is God's direction for her in terms of dating?
04:50 She has to know herself. Okay.
04:53 So just gonna kind of tell us out there
04:56 why do you all think it takes so much longer,
04:58 and it just seems to me it takes a little bit longer
05:00 for people to get married nowadays.
05:01 I remember my parents,
05:02 you know, they would have been married,
05:04 you know, I'm just now looking to get married,
05:06 you know, and I shout out to my fiancee Kimberly does,
05:09 you know, so I'm just gonna say that right there.
05:11 But, you know I'm just now getting married.
05:13 You know, and I'm 27,
05:16 you know, my parents they got married way younger.
05:18 So why is it now it seems that it's just taking people
05:20 longer to really get married?
05:25 There are, I think a lot of contributing factors,
05:28 the societal factors
05:31 we are spending longer in school.
05:34 It's taking more education to make a living wage.
05:38 As economy getting worse, it's harder to find jobs.
05:41 Okay. That's one thing.
05:43 The other thing is--
05:45 if you go back to 100 years, 150 years,
05:49 humans were maturing very faster emotionally,
05:55 they knew who they were,
05:56 they were able to take on
05:58 responsibility at a younger age,
06:01 not too long after puberty,
06:03 few years they were able to find a job
06:05 and started a family.
06:08 But I think that
06:10 because of the degradation of society
06:13 we're taking longer to mature.
06:14 We don't know who we are.
06:16 We are in adolescence for extended period of time
06:19 till the 20s and late 30s.
06:21 Okay, let me go down to the economy little bit.
06:23 Okay, it's all right.
06:24 You know, also I'd like say too,
06:26 is, you know, um, there's a generation now
06:28 that is grown up to be very skeptical.
06:31 Seeing, you know, their families,
06:34 their parents be married
06:35 and they get divorced shortly after.
06:37 Then we also live the world of media--
06:40 there is, you know, there should old days,
06:42 you know, that kind of black and white days TV days,
06:45 they used to have husband and wife
06:46 they'd be married and everything will happen,
06:48 the mother, the father,
06:50 the dog and a son and a daughter
06:52 and everything just went well.
06:53 Everything was perfect. Everything was perfect.
06:54 Yeah. They drank milk--
06:56 they trained horses all the time.
06:57 Yeah.
06:58 But now the TV show that come out
07:00 you have the husband and wife
07:02 they always find out each other,
07:03 the children have respect for their parents.
07:05 And the generation now is watching these episodes
07:09 and the Bible says by beholding one becomes changed.
07:11 So when they watch it, it becomes part of them,
07:13 so this generation has become
07:15 even more skeptical of relationship
07:17 to see will they work.
07:18 Yeah. Yeah.
07:19 I think, though in terms of dating,
07:23 you know, we're trying to find a spouse.
07:26 I think, sometimes we get caught up
07:28 in the idea of being married.
07:30 We fantasize about it, like, you know,
07:33 women when we actually go out with a guy
07:35 we actually give you the time of the day.
07:37 We've already decided in our minds
07:38 you are probably husband material.
07:40 And so we've already, kind of,
07:43 pick you out and so we fantasize
07:45 what our last name would sound like next to yours,
07:48 and all those things.
07:50 And we romanticize the ideas, so much--
07:53 Really?
07:54 That without it we feel like,
07:56 we are not whole, we are not complete.
07:59 There is something is wrong with us.
08:01 And so I just think that's very interesting
08:03 why as women do we do that?
08:05 Do we ascribe our value to being married
08:08 and is there biblical base behind that?
08:10 It's a question. Yeah.
08:12 I wasn't gonna answer that question.
08:14 But I was gonna say that
08:18 when you look at the ratio
08:19 of eligible young men and eligible young women,
08:24 it's in the men's favor
08:27 if you're gonna look at it that way.
08:29 It's easily, you know, 80 percent women,
08:33 20 percent men and sometimes,
08:35 you know, 70, 30 somewhere around there.
08:38 So because of that,
08:41 men are playing the field more especially
08:44 if there are women,
08:45 certain type of women who are in order
08:48 to get the attention of men
08:49 will dress a certain way
08:51 and allow the man to do certain things with the woman.
08:56 Sexuality getting,
08:58 physically intimate before marriage.
09:01 So these are other things
09:03 that are contributing to the fact
09:05 that men are just not, stepping up,
09:09 you know, being men.
09:11 Yeah, I'm so happy you said that.
09:13 They can praise that.
09:14 I mean, you know-- Yeah.
09:16 I mean there are a lot of options out there
09:18 so hey I don't want to--
09:19 I want to able take advantage this
09:21 because it's there,
09:22 it's offered to me, why not, you know.
09:25 And that's really was happening
09:26 and it really goes both ways
09:27 because of the standards
09:28 that we as men may be are lowering ourselves to
09:31 and the women are also doing the same thing.
09:33 I truly believe that men still can lead the household,
09:37 they can still lead by their actions.
09:41 It is all about placing value of oneself,
09:43 I remember when I was in Cincinnati,
09:46 when I used to be in Cincinnati,
09:48 I used to transferring your gifts stuff and,
09:50 you know, when you get something
09:51 you just eat and you just--
09:52 you don't really have that kind of appreciation.
09:54 But when you have to set aside money to purchase something
09:57 and when you purchase that thing,
09:58 you're going to take care of that thing.
10:00 I just bought a car some years ago
10:02 I'm still paying on my car.
10:03 I'm taking care of my car.
10:05 But if it is just given to me
10:07 then I won't necessarily have that much of value of it.
10:09 So if a young lady comes and she starts give herself
10:12 and most of the ladies started to give themselves
10:14 then it makes easy for men
10:16 to not put the value on the woman
10:18 which is not God required for us.
10:20 He calls for us even die for the woman.
10:23 And if I just pick you back on that
10:24 I would say part of the reasons
10:26 why women are throwing themselves at guys
10:29 is because society has given us values
10:32 that are not necessarily biblical values
10:35 and so you have men who looking for superficial thing in women.
10:40 You know, like they are I guess hip to waist ratios,
10:46 you know, and wanting them to look like models
10:48 when the reality is that your average woman
10:51 does not look like your magazine model.
10:54 And so those are not thing that make
10:56 for valuable long lasting life long commitments in marriage
11:02 and those superficial standards
11:04 are what translates into your marriage statistics.
11:06 That's why you have one in two marriages failing.
11:10 And so when people look at these things
11:13 they are skeptical about getting into something
11:17 as sacred as a marriage commitment.
11:20 You know, or they translate
11:22 or they bring those superficial standards into marriage.
11:25 That's why you have things like prenups,
11:27 I mean, you know, in biblical times
11:30 they did not have things like prenups because you went--
11:33 not even too long ago,
11:34 you know in the 50s and the 60s you never really had prenups
11:39 as prevalent as they are now.
11:43 And so, you know, you are going into your marriage,
11:46 something as sacred as marriage commitment,
11:48 having kind of like a back door
11:51 and you wonder why people are divorcing
11:54 left, right and centre.
11:55 You have people who're married for 72 days.
11:57 And you're wondering, you know, and you're wondering
12:00 why marriage is not treated with much respect.
12:04 Because what you said, actually look at the title
12:06 "Eenie, Meenie, Miney, Mo, Catch a Spouse by the Toe."
12:09 We have kind of catch a spouse like you!
12:13 And you know, and yeah, especially as women
12:15 sometimes we have ascribed to this idea
12:17 that you see a man he's a good man,
12:19 you got to grab him, club him and drag him
12:21 back to your lawyer and,
12:23 you know and try to get him to marry you as soon as possible
12:27 because he might be the last ship.
12:29 You know, you better hurry up and grab this one.
12:32 Because there might not be any good men left and so--
12:35 I see you are in your 30s.
12:36 Yeah, and I'm 30, you know, what I mean?
12:41 Call out. Right, thank you for call out.
12:43 You know, but I really believe that
12:47 if we take time to allow God to bring us a mate if you notice,
12:53 Eve was brought to Adam.
12:55 Adam recognized his need for Eve first
12:59 and too often times we're trying to go into marriage
13:02 before we've had some maturity
13:04 where the man recognizes I need a wife.
13:06 When a man recognizes that he needs a woman in his life
13:10 to help make him, you know,
13:11 better then he is ready to embrace the marriage.
13:14 When a woman recognizes
13:15 that she was brought to that man
13:18 then there is not that tension of fighting, you know,
13:21 I have got to marry you.
13:22 She is trying to, you know, you better wife me,
13:25 if you like you better put a ring on it.
13:27 Well, I have got to say this, you know,
13:29 I hear what you're saying Ms. Kim,
13:31 but I just feel even though
13:33 the options are in our favor as men
13:35 I do think it is still hard to find a good woman.
13:39 Now you could argue that it's also hard to find a good man,
13:42 but I think it's hard to find a good woman.
13:45 Hold on, say my brothers, would agree with me?
13:48 No. Yes, I have too, you know--
13:55 But the Bible says,
13:56 "He who findeth a wife fideth a good thing
13:58 and obtain the favor from the Lord,"
14:00 that's in Proverbs.
14:02 I have to go with Kim. Kim actually made my point.
14:06 I think the way that we approach it
14:08 often is very humanistic.
14:10 You look in the Bible, the examples,
14:12 God brought Eve to Adam. You look at Isaac.
14:17 Isaac's wife was brought to him.
14:20 And then when you contrast those two examples with Samson.
14:26 Samson what did he tell his parents?
14:28 Get her for because she pleases me well
14:31 and of course it was probably, predominantly physical.
14:36 So Adam and Isaac they aligned their will
14:39 with Gods and Isaac of course,
14:42 his parents were-- his father was involved.
14:46 Samson went against his parents.
14:48 He said, I like her I'm going after her.
14:51 So I think part of the promise we are humanistic
14:54 in the way we approach relationships.
14:56 Okay.
14:57 And I think also to when you look at,
14:59 you know, Adam had a job, Adam had responsibilities.
15:01 Yes. Jacob I think he--
15:04 Hallelujah.
15:05 Amen. Amen.
15:07 Jacob was-- I think Abraham sent one his servant to go--
15:11 I think Jacob was doing some stuff.
15:13 Then, you know, his wife came.
15:16 Samson was suppose to be function as judge
15:19 and he is leaving where he supposed to be
15:21 not doing his job and going out.
15:24 And so too many times it's challenging even for us men,
15:28 we have find it so easy
15:29 not to be doing our responsibilities
15:31 and just going for a pleasure for a season
15:34 and it doesn't built up or boost anything
15:36 to making thing better.
15:37 So as result we're now trying to keep on finding
15:40 different dibs and dabs.
15:41 And ladies on the other side
15:44 even though the numbers are 80, 20 or 20, 80 and 30, 70
15:50 ladies it's so important to continue to show yourself
15:53 and your identity and the fact of this,
15:55 if every lady shows herself and don't try to give up
15:59 as some people say the goody bag
16:02 or whatever the cookie.
16:04 If they don't that then there'll be
16:06 nothing for men to try-- have to get or try to go get.
16:09 That goes both ways. It goes both ways.
16:11 As long as-- I'm sorry you just did
16:13 but I don't want to miss the point,
16:14 because this along the same lines Adam was asleep
16:20 when God brought Eve to him.
16:24 Same thing-- well, Isaac wasn't asleep
16:26 but he was in the field meditating.
16:28 So he was in communion with God
16:30 so he was as a word, dead to self.
16:33 And he had his eyes closed and he had his faith was in God
16:37 to bring that woman to him.
16:39 Okay.
16:40 Samson-- get her for me
16:42 because I see her and I like what I see.
16:46 And this is the result we have.
16:47 So we need to depend less on self and more on God.
16:52 Okay, and I want to--
16:53 it's really very good where we are here,
16:55 but I would like to challenge you all to be practical now.
16:58 What can we really do-- now the girl had this dilemma.
17:01 What can she really do?
17:03 Ladies, what can she really do to attract a man?
17:06 And men, what could--
17:07 can a men do to really attract or get the right woman?
17:12 What are the some things we can practically say,
17:14 some advice for individuals, even for ourselves.
17:17 Well, among the first thing is you need sit down
17:19 and decided what is that you want to attract.
17:21 Okay.
17:22 You have to decide what it is you--
17:25 make a list a grocery list whatever kind of list you want.
17:29 Biblically based look in the word
17:31 for what the Bible presents as a godly man
17:36 and look for those kinds of examples,
17:38 and then give it to God
17:39 and be a batch of Father's business.
17:40 What you're saying is
17:41 you are looking at more emotional,
17:44 more personality traits,
17:46 more character traits not just a physical.
17:48 Right. Okay.
17:50 There is this example
17:51 where one of my friends was saying that,
17:53 you know, she really likes carrot cake.
17:56 Because it's good for your, its healthy,
17:58 it's got carrot and nuts and all these great things.
18:00 But it always looks crazy, kind of, you know.
18:04 And then there sheet cake which is nothing
18:06 but sugar and flour and flour.
18:08 But you can design it and it's so pretty
18:10 and it looks all great and it's kind of,
18:12 like where are the carrot sheet cakes.
18:15 With the character, the great qualities,
18:19 but they are attractive as well.
18:21 But I think if you look for the character Bible says,
18:24 you know, man looks at out but God looks at the heart.
18:26 If you find somebody with carrot cake character
18:30 then the outside becomes more attractive to you.
18:33 I don't know everybody can identify
18:34 with somebody who was fine.
18:36 But their personality was like man,
18:39 and eventually the more you got to know,
18:40 then you are like--
18:41 I don't want anything to do with him.
18:42 So I will say look for the character
18:44 and then be a batch of Father's business.
18:46 If you look at the women in the Bible
18:49 they were about to be their Father's business.
18:50 So I want to say,
18:52 I want to say so even if they aren't fine
18:54 you still got to go for they are fine?
18:57 You know, I mean isn't that trick to play a part.
19:01 I mean, come on Brother Kean, come on have yourself.
19:03 I appreciate what Kim is saying what you are saying
19:06 but I disagree with having a list
19:10 and trying to attract somebody.
19:14 You will attract who you are. You focus on God.
19:19 Just like you said earlier we have to know God,
19:22 we can't know our selves before we know God.
19:25 First of all Adam recognized God.
19:28 God formed him breathed breath of life into him.
19:31 Adam opened his eyes first thing he saw was God,
19:34 then he knew who he was in relation to God.
19:37 Once you have that and you,
19:39 God begins to develop your character
19:41 you will attract people like yourself.
19:46 So it's not a matter of trying to attract,
19:49 it's organic, it's natural.
19:51 Okay.
19:53 And Nelson, as you said that's a good point too
19:54 and what I would also like to add with that
19:56 is that when Adam--
19:59 now you said when he was awaken by God he saw God.
20:02 I also heard of,
20:04 pope has said that for women he said
20:07 "grow so close unto God that when a man finds you
20:12 its like he is finding a God, revealed through you."
20:15 And so when Adam woke up after God says
20:18 it's not good for man to be alone and after Adam,
20:20 you know, named the animals and he put them to rest
20:23 and he took a blade of rib and Eve comes to him.
20:25 When he woke up the next thing
20:26 he saw was revelation through Eve.
20:28 And so now it's like that.
20:30 So ladies you continue to grow into God and men,
20:34 we have to grow into God as well.
20:35 So when it comes down to what marriage is
20:37 it's a function of God, husband and wife or man,
20:39 woman they become married
20:40 and they continue to grow closer to God
20:42 as they closer to each other.
20:44 And I would just like to add on to that
20:45 and just make it even more practical.
20:47 I would say for the young lady keep--
20:50 find out how deeply rooted you are in God.
20:54 Because it's easy for, it's easy for us
20:57 especially as women to be so caught up
20:59 in the idea of being in a relationship.
21:02 We get to the point of we are in love with love.
21:05 And so, we are not necessarily looking for people
21:08 who will complement us in our relationship with God.
21:14 We just looking for someone to feel this void in our lives,
21:18 because we are created for relationship.
21:20 We are created by God, who is love
21:22 and by extension we crave that love.
21:25 And so I would tell her and for anybody else,
21:29 is figure out how your relationship with God is.
21:33 Let God be the fulfilling factor in your life.
21:36 And then once you have the down pack
21:39 then you can be able to say okay Lord,
21:42 me and You have that great relationship.
21:46 How about you feeling this other part of me
21:49 that is lacking, you know?
21:51 You're saying that a relationship
21:53 actually be an idol wanting to be
21:56 and the relationship could overshadow God.
21:59 Oh, it definitely because I know,
22:01 I know personally from my experience
22:03 is that there was a time when I would--
22:07 it's like you think you have it right with God.
22:10 But as soon as somebody comes into your life
22:12 somehow you value spending time more with that person
22:17 than you do with the God that gave you that person.
22:20 And so, in that essence-- in that time,
22:24 you know that person does become an idol
22:26 and it's not until, you know, you recognize hey,
22:29 God has to take first place in my life
22:32 to the point where nothing else can tamper with that,
22:36 you know then I would say that is the time
22:39 when you're ready for a relationship.
22:41 When you are so grounded in God that nothing,
22:45 not a job, not a person,
22:46 not anything can come between you and your relationship
22:49 that would be the time I would say that you--
22:52 And I want to say this and I appreciate what you said,
22:54 you know, but I'm thinking
22:55 about this whole relationship thing
22:57 and thinking about trying to find
22:58 or trying to wait for someone to come everyone say,
23:01 isn't it that fear that you're gonna have to settle?
23:05 You know, to settle for--
23:07 which is because the statistics are,
23:08 you know, and may be God brought him to me
23:10 may be He didn't but maybe
23:11 just because someone came to me that I just,
23:13 you know, I got to just take,
23:15 take advantage of it because I'm right there, you know.
23:16 How you keep from settling? How do you define settling?
23:19 Well, I mean settling could be this was not my ideal
23:23 but I'm going to go ahead.
23:25 Again, I think that's,
23:27 the conventional humanistic way.
23:32 Any guy comes along, you know,
23:33 I take him because he might be the last one.
23:36 That's the confidence in what I can see what my--
23:39 I can see around me my ability to attract
23:43 and to keep a man.
23:44 When you, what it is a shift from self to God,
23:49 there is no settling.
23:51 There is not even, you know,
23:52 you even lose the need to tell God what you need
23:56 because you know that God wants for you
23:59 what's best for you.
24:01 And even what better than what you want for yourself.
24:04 So you God-- you would understand God--
24:06 you created me for relationships
24:08 and I know that You will fulfill this in Your time.
24:13 So I think that kind of--
24:15 Okay but-- okay, that was good but I mean...
24:17 You know...
24:18 No that's good. It's good.
24:20 I just want to challenge you more because,
24:21 I mean, now I'm sitting here
24:22 and saying I want to find someone okay
24:24 and I'm going to wait for God,
24:26 but how do I really find the right one.
24:29 How do I, how do I-- you know,
24:30 because I could think that because this person is decent
24:34 that God has brought him into my life.
24:35 But how I really find the right one?
24:37 What are some things that we could do?
24:40 Well, one of the things that I would ask, is,
24:42 are you constantly keeping yourself in communion with God?
24:45 Because one thing that Bible has consistently shown us
24:47 is that God is in constant communion with us.
24:51 He is willing. He wants the best for us.
24:53 He's always willing to lead and guide
24:55 and so even and more so in a decision
24:59 that is as important as marriage
25:01 God designed for marriage to be life long.
25:04 And so, to imagine that you have
25:06 the rest of your days in front of you
25:09 God wants to be a part of that decision
25:10 and He will guide to the right person,
25:13 if you're willing to listen to, to what He has to say
25:17 and to surrender your will, you know, for His.
25:21 And what I think so great about suppose your will,
25:23 you know, the Bible talks about we commit our way to God.
25:26 He will give us the desires of our heart.
25:28 But the first part is committing our way,
25:30 giving ourselves to God and we become like God.
25:33 So, our desires become His desires
25:36 and His desires for us become our desires.
25:38 So as we get to know someone else
25:41 we desire what He wants.
25:43 So we are then allowed to come together
25:46 with not catch but meet, engage,
25:50 get to know the person that God has for our life
25:53 and I think that has to do
25:54 also with some self introspection,
25:56 examining your relationship, your parent's relationships,
25:59 looking at some of those different things
26:02 maybe they didn't do so well,
26:03 looking at the things that they did really well,
26:05 looking at what are you normally attracted to
26:08 are those healthy qualities, are those good qualities.
26:11 And really thinking, doing some self inspection
26:13 and that combined with getting our desires
26:17 align with God's desires
26:18 will help you find the right person.
26:20 It's not just jumping forward, getting wherever you want.
26:22 Like just where they come in front of you just like,
26:24 you got to actually think about this thing.
26:26 And if want to get the out come
26:27 that you want you got to really think about it, okay.
26:29 We use this scripture so many times
26:32 and in sad situations a lot of times as a pastor
26:34 people use and read it during funerals
26:37 but when we look at Palms 23 it says that
26:39 the "Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not be in want."
26:42 And if we just come to the perspective of God
26:45 being a Shepherd,
26:46 as when I was little boy I used to even my dad,
26:49 you know, I be with my dad and you know my dad,
26:51 I'm taller to my dad now
26:52 but when I was little boy, my dad was like,
26:54 the tallest man in the world.
26:56 And everything he did, I replicated,
26:58 I tried to follow all the things he did.
27:01 So with those the situations,
27:04 I used to follow him and just trust my dad and if,
27:07 because my dad was like a shepherd.
27:10 In our situation we just have to look at God
27:12 and trust Him as we could to be in God
27:15 to know that He is a Shepherd.
27:16 And since we know that He is a Shepherd
27:17 and He is gonna lead us to the right place
27:19 that we don't have to worry.
27:20 We don't have to worry
27:21 because we know that God will supply all our needs
27:23 according to His riches and glory.
27:24 That's beautiful.
27:25 We are gonna wrap it up with that.
27:27 Bible does say,
27:28 "Whosoever findeth a wife findeth a good thing,
27:32 and obtaineth favor of the Lord"
27:34 and I think we can add husbands in there as well.
27:36 The reality is that God wants you to find favor with Him
27:39 and He has someone specially designed just for you.
27:42 And so remember, despite all the difficulties,
27:45 despite all the mess
27:46 that's going on in your life with the things,
27:47 its hard for you to find someone,
27:49 know that God has someone for you.
27:50 So that's our program for today.
27:52 Just you remember to make pure choices.


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Revised 2015-05-28