Participants: Cheri Peters (Host), Buddy Williams, Bryan Myers, Lemuel Vega
Series Code: CLR
Program Code: CLR000106A
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00:01 The following program discusses sensitive issues
00:03 related to addictive behavior. 00:05 Parents are cautioned that some material 00:06 may be too candid for younger children. 00:10 Welcome to "Celebrating Life in Recovery." 00:12 I'm Cheri your host. 00:13 We're gonna talk to two guys on this program 00:16 that has spent a good portion of their life in prison 00:19 and now they are going back in 00:21 and grab and hold of anybody who will listen. 00:24 It's gonna be cool. 00:54 Welcome back. 00:55 Today we're gonna be talking about some pretty heavy stuff. 00:59 We're gonna over some testimonies. 01:00 We're gonna listen to how God stand somebody up in ministry. 01:04 I am really excited that who is here 01:06 we're gonna interview Buddy, we're gonna interview you. 01:09 And thank you for being on the program, 01:11 and also Bryan who works with you. 01:13 But before we get there, I want to say something 01:15 that's I think really important in our journey. 01:18 Because when I first got into recovery I was serious, 01:22 I looked at all the issues and the fact that I had, 01:25 you know, junk, you know, I had look at and deal with 01:29 and drug addictions and I had to learn how to be social 01:32 and be normal and I am thinking normal, 01:34 I didn't even know what that was. 01:37 But, you know, after little while God looked at me and said 01:40 I really think through the Holy Spirit. 01:42 He said, you know what? 01:43 Are you plan at all, 01:45 you know, are you laughing at all, are you hanging out. 01:48 And He really took the recovery 01:50 and try to put it in perspective for me. 01:52 That we're gonna look at issues 01:54 through your journey with God. 01:55 You're gonna look at things 01:57 and you are gonna have to learn 01:58 different behaviors think different. 02:00 God renews our mind, changes all that kind of stuff. 02:04 But He's really gonna show you how to celebrate too. 02:07 And at the end of the program I want to show you 02:10 something that we put together for the churches. 02:12 Its called "Celebrating Life in Recovery" "Steps to Christ." 02:15 How do you go through all of this junk, 02:17 but remember to have fun, meet people, 02:21 form friendships to all the things 02:23 that God want you to do. 02:24 I took piano lessons, art lessons. 02:26 I ended up on taking biking and cycling and, 02:30 you know, doing stuff with my family. 02:32 And so part of recovery is to learn 02:34 how to do all that kind of stuff too, 02:36 it's not just looking at anger or fear or addition. 02:39 And so as you are doing this, 02:41 put in a lot of time to have fun. 02:45 And I love--I read in a book one time as I talked about it. 02:49 If you're driving down the street 02:50 and you're looking through your front window of the car, 02:54 you have a little rearview mirror, it's tiny, 02:57 but you really do have to look at what's behind you sometimes. 03:00 But if you just focused on that rearview mirror 03:02 you're gonna run into something, 03:04 you know, what I mean. 03:05 And this is same in recovery. 03:06 Now that you are getting your life back 03:08 and you're gonna have a great time doing that. 03:10 Every once in a while you're gonna look at your stuff 03:13 but don't get stuck there. 03:14 Because, you know, God says look at Me. 03:17 I am gonna really-- I am your advocate, 03:19 I am gonna teach you some stuff. 03:20 I am gonna teach you to laugh. 03:22 I am gonna teach you to be normal. 03:23 I am gonna teach you that there is a God in heaven 03:24 that cares about you and He's gonna restore, 03:27 redeem, and stand you up in ways that are unbelievable. 03:31 And so now, Buddy, that brings me to you 03:34 because I have seen just since we met, 03:37 just talking on the phone and meeting today 03:40 as that I have seen God do that in your life. 03:43 And so we're gonna find out who you are and, 03:45 you know, if you need to even start from the beginning 03:48 and then how God stood you up. 03:50 Well, well, I first of all want to say 03:53 I also thank you for allow me to be here 03:56 and it's just a blessing to be able to come and to share. 03:59 And I can definitely relate to a lot of people 04:04 that have lot of issues in their life. 04:06 I started off at a young age and I was-- 04:11 had a very loving mother and my father 04:15 though he was a good guy but he was never around. 04:19 He was always locked up in prison in and out and then-- 04:24 From the time you were really little? 04:26 Yeah, from the time I was really little. 04:28 So I don't really have a lot of memories of my father. 04:31 He was in and out 04:33 and then I remember a couple of times but, 04:36 you know, like one time I remember, 04:38 he had escaped I didn't know that. 04:40 Then he came around a couple times but he couldn't hang out 04:43 because, you know, the police were looking for him. 04:46 Then another time, you know, 04:48 he was finally arrested and then back in. 04:52 And then another time I remember he was on the run 04:55 and I'd never see him that time. 04:56 Well, yeah one time when he first left 04:59 he was on the run for like 13.5 years, 05:02 you know, he was wanted for escape and so I-- 05:05 And if it sounds like it's really interesting 05:07 as what you said is even though he wanted to be in your life 05:10 he couldn't, because he knew that he couldn't show up 05:12 somewhere that was so obvious-- 05:14 Right, and he made--right and he made some mistakes, 05:18 you know, so he couldn't come around his own family 05:21 he wanted to, but he couldn't. 05:22 Did you visit him in jail? 05:25 One time when I was kid, 05:27 I remember once like most places, 05:30 no--we, I didn't get to go see him. 05:33 But like I said, I was really little 05:35 and he took off and escaped 05:37 and I was just really like two-years-old, 05:40 when I first knew. Yeah, really young. 05:42 Yeah, two and three and four in that age 05:44 and then he escape for, he was going for 13.5 year, 05:49 so I've never got to, you know, see him then 05:52 but I think one time when he first took off, 05:55 a couple times he was in and out you know hiding. 05:58 But my mother she raised three of us, 06:02 me and my brother and sister and she did best she could. 06:05 She got saved, found the Lord 06:07 when I was about eight-years-old. 06:09 So before then, you know, the life 06:12 that I remember it wasn't very good, 06:15 you know, I was definitely just heard trying to raise us and, 06:19 you know, he was in and out 06:20 and then she raised us by herself, she worked hard. 06:24 God comes in the picture and the home is actually safer. 06:28 Yes. More stable. 06:29 Yes, and she's trying to do her best and work 06:31 and support three kids and is really hard over, 06:34 but she did very well and she got saved 06:37 like when I was about eight. 06:38 So then we started going to church. 06:40 You know, and that's at the age of 11 06:46 probably right around there I was in fifth grade, 06:49 the summer the fifth grade. 06:51 First time I really remember actually using myself I started, 06:55 you know, I smoked cigarettes already 06:57 but then I started smoking marijuana 06:58 and then it went on to other things 07:01 and before you knew that I was-- 07:03 A lot of people will say fifth grade, no way. 07:06 But, you know, it's amazing to me how many really young kids 07:10 start to use especially like smoking 07:13 just experimenting with stuff. 07:15 Yes. And I started earlier 07:16 and I know many people start way before that age, 07:19 you know, but I started then and then before you know it, 07:23 you know its causing problems because my mother is real strict 07:27 and I would be sneaking out of the house 07:30 me and my little brother, 07:31 you know, I was a bad influence on him 07:33 'cause he's three and half years younger than me 07:35 and he's trying to follow me you know. 07:37 And so he started earlier than me, you know. 07:40 So I am doing things I shouldn't 07:43 and then for you know, what, 07:45 you know, I am getting in trouble. 07:46 I went to jail I was like 15. 07:49 I went 15 or 16 I went to the jail for the first time 07:53 but I was so out of it. 07:54 They thought that I had overdosed on something 07:57 because I was, you know, coming to. 07:59 And so they ended up taking me to the hospital 08:02 and they were gonna pump my stomach 08:03 but I guess they found out that I was just drunk. 08:05 I drink so much, you know, when I was 08:09 because I would always have to hurry and get home. 08:11 Everybody else could hang out but not me. 08:12 My mom is strict, so I had to get home so I thought 08:15 man, if I hurry and drink all this real quick 08:17 then I'll go home but see if you drink it too quick 08:20 then you can't function at all and that's what I try to do. 08:22 When you get toxic 08:24 I mean, you really actually poison ourself 08:25 and we don't even know it. 08:27 Yes, I should have been dead many times 08:28 just from the alcohol poisoning because I did it all the time. 08:31 So at early age I became drinker, you know. 08:34 I want to hang out with the crowd 08:36 and the people that I thought was cool I did what they did. 08:39 And so I started at early age 08:40 and I was hanging out with older people 08:42 and that became a problem 08:44 because where I was from 08:46 Wabash, Indiana is where I'm from 08:49 and they started early. 08:51 There are lot of kids and I was just 08:53 hanging out with the wrong crowd 08:54 and I can't blame them but I chose to do what they did. 08:59 And then at early age I started getting in trouble 09:01 and I got in trouble another time for drinking 09:06 and then it went on, in and out for drinking. 09:07 So in and out of jail and juvenile, all that kind stuff? 09:10 Yeah juvenile, I ended up going to boy school 09:13 and then it was just internally for drinking, 09:16 you know, being a problem child I was what I became. 09:20 And so my mother she couldn't really do much with me. 09:25 She got married, you know, to my step dad 09:29 and he was real strict and so it was real strict in our home 09:32 and I was real rebellious. 09:34 You know, I wanted to do things my way 09:36 and I choose to do with my way so I got it my way. 09:39 I ended up going to prison. 09:41 Well, first of all 09:44 alcohol and drugs centers. 09:46 Buddy, I've to say that it's interesting 09:48 what you just said is like, 09:49 you know, I wanted to do it my way and I got it my way. 09:52 And so all of the consequences 09:53 for everything that you were doing 09:55 all the sudden its right there in your hands. 09:57 Okay now I'm in jail 09:58 and I am having to deal with all of this kind of stuff. 10:01 Right, so I ended up saying and thinking that I thought, 10:06 man, I don't want to go by these rules, I want to have fun. 10:08 Everybody else gets to go out and do all these, why can't I? 10:11 But my mom is a loving mother and tried to raise me right. 10:13 And she tried to raise me by the word. 10:15 And I just chose to rebel 10:17 because I wanted to be like everybody else. 10:19 So I was in and out 10:21 and then I went to couple treatment centers 10:24 to try to get away from prison. 10:25 I wasn't there to be serious 10:27 and I did the steps I tried the steps, 10:30 you know, but I wasn't opened up, 10:32 I didn't let it in my heart enough, you know. 10:34 I wasn't really ready. 10:36 You were just playing the system. 10:37 I was trying to play the system 10:39 because I didn't want to go to prison, 10:40 you know, and I was getting high there. 10:42 I was going on passes and came back and selling weed there, 10:45 you know, I was not serious. 10:47 And as soon as I was out, 10:49 you know, I mean the day I got out, 10:50 you know, I am drinking, you know, I was not serious. 10:53 I mean I was doing things in there even. 10:55 So anyway I ended up going on to prison, 10:59 I ended, soon as I got out of the drug centers 11:01 I would I ended up in prison then back out 11:04 as soon as I get out, I was back there. 11:05 What were the charges when you were going in and out, 11:07 because it sounds like you weren't robbing 11:09 or stealing or doing all that kind stuff. 11:12 Yeah, well first of all it's just alcohol, 11:15 you know, in the jail I was always just for alcohol. 11:17 But yeah, it came to where I started stealing for my habit. 11:21 I started just burglary, 11:23 you know, I wasn't robbing with the gun or nothing but, 11:26 you know, to me I say, this is all petty things 11:28 but you know it is serious. 11:30 I was stealing things and burglary, 11:32 so I, you know, I would go to prison 11:34 I was in there like two, three times 11:36 just for like theft, burglary, a bunch of burglaries. 11:40 And but while I was in prison, 11:42 while I was in jail my mindset was still to do the same things. 11:46 I still want to get high, you know, 11:48 and that's all my mindset was, was just to get high. 11:52 You know, it would-- I had a lot issues in my life 11:55 and if I got high it just kind of escaped everything else. 11:58 I didn't have to think about everything else. 12:00 Everything was okay. 12:01 Yeah, I didn't have to be responsible. 12:02 I just, you know, I would just get high 12:05 and then I would-- 12:07 when I come down I get high again if I could. 12:09 So I was constantly even in jail 12:12 trying to think of a way to get high. 12:13 How do I get high? How can we get this in here? 12:17 You know, so we would always scam and try 12:19 and what we usually accomplish a few things and, 12:22 you know, we get in there and tried to escape, you know. 12:27 What's really interesting 12:28 as for some purchase is that even in prison 12:31 you've got somebody trying to make wine out of the fruit 12:33 and I mean that you were literally-- 12:37 you can get high wherever you want it, get high. 12:40 I mean, it doesn't matter that you're behind bars, 12:41 doesn't matter about all that kind stuff. 12:44 And you know I want to ask you because it's interesting to me 12:48 that coming down was not okay with you. 12:52 Being a normal, being in your right mind was not okay, 12:56 you just you know, I don't want to be clear headed. 13:01 I don't want to be normal, 13:02 I feel better when I've got drugs or alcohol in me. 13:06 I socialize better, I have more fun 13:10 and that's what we really tell ourselves 13:11 especially I think coming from a home 13:13 where you know, everything is crazy 13:15 and dad's gonna all that kind stuff is that, 13:18 you know, we want to feel better. 13:20 Yes, and that is so true. 13:22 But mainly for me it's just 13:25 that's what I would do just to escape 13:27 I didn't have to think about my problems. 13:29 I didn't have to think about not be in home. 13:31 I didn't have to think about all that. 13:33 You know, so I was, 13:35 you know, in school I just started at young age 13:37 and even at school I was doing, 13:39 you know, I went to school to get high 13:41 because my mom was so strict, 13:42 I didn't want to stay home I want to go to school. 13:45 So I go to school because there was party to me you know. 13:48 Anyway when I ended up going to prison 13:50 you know I was for stealing and burglary 13:53 and I ended up doing like few months here few months there 13:56 then it went to--I did almost three years straight and-- 14:01 But every time I got out, you know, I would go right back 14:05 because I was doing the same old things. 14:06 I was never out very long. 14:09 I ended up getting like us 16 year sentence 14:13 two, eight years sentences in Wabash run in while 14:17 constantly we have to do one sentence then the next. 14:20 And I mean they're doing the same thing 14:23 because I learned at early age with the people I hung out with. 14:26 I would go to prison I would know-- 14:28 I would hook up with the people that I knew 14:30 and they were doing those type of things. 14:31 So that's what I will do, that's what I need to do. 14:34 I learned early how to hustle in there and, 14:36 you know, how to get by and, you know, so I did that, 14:39 you know, I would try to manage things 14:41 to where, how can we get this in? 14:43 How can I get high? 14:44 How can I get money? 14:46 And that's the way I lived in. 14:49 For people that are not educated, 14:52 you know, it's oblivious that there are drugs 14:54 and that kind of alcohol in the prison system. 14:57 How normally, how common is that? 15:01 This very common especially years back well I was there, 15:04 I've been out six years now, 15:06 but while I was in there, it's very common. 15:09 That's what people did then you know, it may be, 15:11 they might have tighter hold on it now in most places. 15:15 But back then it was real common and, 15:18 you know, if you it's-- 15:19 there is many different ways to get drugs in there 15:22 and that's just what we did. 15:23 We hustle whatever you can. 15:25 And I was addicted to that lifestyle even 15:29 and I just-- that's what I did. 15:30 Talk about that a bit, 15:32 because it's not that's not a chemical addiction, 15:34 but the addiction to the lifestyle is huge. 15:36 Most of us don't see that into way into recovery. 15:39 Right I-- 'Cause I like to hustle. 15:43 Yeah, I love that lifestyle, I loved to hustle. 15:46 I loved to be around that type of environment 15:48 that type of people that were doing those things. 15:50 And especially if you're hustling 15:52 and you have like if you got the stuff, 15:56 you know, you got power too. 15:57 You know and there's something with that power, 15:59 there's something that you just think, 16:01 man, I got, you know, I can do about anything I want in here 16:04 you know, because I know lot of people 16:06 wouldn't understand this but prison used to be fun. 16:09 You know, we would say, man, it isn't so bad 16:11 so the consequences if prison is so fun when we get out, 16:15 well, it wouldn't bother us to go do these things we use to do 16:18 because the consequences isn't that bad. 16:20 You go to prison, you go, 16:21 you're going there and you stay high everyday. 16:23 I mean you get drunk a lot, 16:25 you know, and you do these things that you can do. 16:28 You can do a lot in there that you did out there. 16:31 Even in that lifestyle is that when somebody says, 16:34 oh, you went to prison wow it's like a-- 16:37 it's almost like batch of honor in some places. 16:40 Yes, a lot places. And so it's like-- 16:43 it's a whole different mindset, 16:45 it's a whole different way of looking at it. 16:47 You get kind of little bit more respect, 16:51 you know, because I've been in, I've been in 10 times, 5 times 16:55 whatever but it's something that you actually get respect for. 17:00 Yes, and a lot people thing it's cool, you know. 17:03 And they think, man, you've been in prison and they go 17:06 and they think it's cool because they've been there. 17:08 So they get out and the people there around, 17:10 they just think its cool and it's definitely not cool at all. 17:14 And but I ended up is all these little things 17:19 that I say or little things that I did, they all added up 17:23 because, yeah I got felony here and I got a felony there 17:27 and then you get arrested again 17:28 and you're just trying to get the best 17:30 till you can with the system 17:32 and you got to fair of those felonies add up 17:34 because if you get three 17:36 which I had few then you can't get such good deal 17:40 because habitual comes into play. 17:42 So I'm in and out and I go in like three or four times 17:46 and then I get in trouble 17:47 while I'm in there for attempt to escape from the jail 17:51 and I ended up getting a four year sentence for that 17:53 and conspiracy to escape. 17:56 And so I'm always seems like I'm always into something 18:00 and then the next day, you know, I'm out, 18:02 I'm only out few days every time 18:04 but the last time I got out I was out five and half months 18:08 and that's the most I've been out since I was 17-years-old. 18:12 I've been out six months at that time. 18:14 So I'm out and I'm doing the same old thing. 18:16 You know, I mean I was in there doing it. 18:18 How you gonna quit out there 18:19 if you don't quit while you're in there. 18:21 So I get out, I'm out just a few days 18:24 like I said five and half months 18:26 I ended up getting in some more trouble 18:28 for a robbery that happened and some thefts, some things. 18:32 Anyway so I go back into the jail. 18:35 I'm still doing the same, having the same mindset, 18:38 I ended up at that time that's when I got the 16 years plus, 18:44 I have parole violations. 18:45 So I go in everything all my buddies were already there. 18:49 I've already been to all these prisons, you know, 18:51 because I got shuffled from this prison to that one 18:53 to that one that one that one, 18:55 you know, just a round of circle. 18:56 None of that is traumatic to you, none of it is big deal. 18:59 I've down this before I am just settling, 19:01 then I'm gonna do my time again. 19:02 I'm just hustling and getting by 19:04 and this is how I'm doing, I'm not thinking about future, 19:06 I'm not thinking nothing but just day-by-day getting high. 19:09 That was my mindset. 19:11 So I ended up going back and everything is already there, 19:13 all my buddies already there, so it's already set up for me, 19:16 so soon as I go in it's on. 19:18 You know, hustling and just constantly taking. 19:22 This my life, this what I do 19:25 and then I ended up while I am in there, 19:27 you know, I am hustling from here to there 19:29 and they just keep moving me to different places 19:30 because I'm under investigation 19:32 and they hear this and hear that, 19:34 but I was never they could never prove it, 19:37 you know, so they would just move me around. 19:39 And so this last time while I was in there, 19:42 I ended up getting in trouble. 19:45 I was at Pendleton Reformatory at the time 19:48 because I'd already got shift from another place 19:49 under investigation for drugs. 19:51 So only way while I am there 19:53 long story short I ended up getting arrested again. 19:57 Good friend of mine was arrested 19:59 for brining in LSD in the visitor room to me. 20:02 And then in the meantime 20:04 I've been under investigation, I didn't know it. 20:07 And a friend of mine that was in there 20:09 sent somebody to a house I had somebody on the street 20:13 holding some marijuana for me 20:16 and keeping some money for me and-- 20:19 so he sent his brother over there with the wire on 20:22 and end up setting me up 20:23 and I was arrested from the prison 20:25 selling marijuana on the street from inside. 20:28 So I ended up getting arrested for all that 20:30 and they filled a breach on me 20:32 and since I would not corporate with them 20:34 because you know I was hardheaded 20:36 and that's just the way 20:38 I lived my life, you know, was it. 20:40 I felt like if you do the time, you know, you pay, 20:45 you know, if you do the time you do the crime, 20:47 you know, I mean if you do the crime, 20:49 you do the time, excuse me. 20:50 So you're just saying to them, 20:52 you know, we don't have to play here 20:53 just tell me how much time I have. 20:55 Right, just tell me what I got to do, 20:57 so I am not getting nobody else involved. 20:59 I am not ruining their life and that's pretty much what I did. 21:03 How much time did they give you for that? 21:05 I ended up getting another 20 year sentence 21:08 added on to the other 16 that I already had. 21:12 And so during this time I was just a miserable mess, 21:18 you know, I fought my case for three years. 21:21 I gave the lawyer right around $30,000 21:24 and he was supposed to work this all out 21:26 and I thought man I got it under control, 21:28 I'm gonna be out here soon 21:29 'cause I was about ready to go home 21:31 and I was rearrested, you know, got charges inside, 21:35 you know, for trafficking, and you know LSD 21:38 and that's a serious offence 21:40 and habitual and the marijuana deals, you know. 21:43 So anyway I'm ready to go home, my family is all excited. 21:46 I don't make it home 21:47 I ended up getting more time when I started with. 21:50 So anyway-- Twenty years? 21:52 Yes I got another 20 years sentence. 21:53 That's a long time. 21:55 Yes, but the thing is all that just sound so bad 21:57 and so terrible and you know it is. 22:00 You know because I let myself get into that mindset 22:04 that this is what I'm gonna do get high 22:06 and I didn't focused on nothing else. 22:08 But the thing about it is man the Lord turned that all around 22:12 because I wasn't trying to serve the Lord. 22:14 I wasn't, you know, I wasn't about the Lord. 22:16 That was the last thing on your mind? 22:17 Yeah, I didn't think about, I'll get with him later. 22:19 I'm getting high right now. Man, I'm having fun. 22:21 I only live once so let's do this right. 22:23 This is me, you know, and that was my mindset 22:28 and I got in trouble 22:29 and you know I was moved from this lock up to that lock up 22:32 and I just spend a lot of time not only the 20 years I got 22:36 but also had to loose all my privileges. 22:39 You know, I had to visit 22:40 through a little glass on a phone chain down like a dog, 22:43 you know, looking through my people if I got to visit 22:45 which my people blessed me with visits. 22:48 And everything was taking away from me you know, 22:51 and I lost time inside the prison also 22:53 because they got a time class. 22:55 Anyway I lost time there and then I had to go lock up. 22:58 I got a couple of years in lock up you know-- 23:02 I love Buddy, because I know that you're still in your mind 23:05 and initially trying to hustle it trying to play it. 23:07 Okay, what I do now, I'm like locked down, 23:09 I'm on the phone, I got glass, 23:11 but you're still in your mind trying to go to 23:14 how am I gonna deal with all this. 23:16 Right and that was my mind is thinking, 23:19 you know, I am gonna make it out of sudden 23:21 it's gonna work out you know I had it all plan. 23:23 Give him all this money man my lawyer is good, 23:26 handle this isn't a big deal. 23:27 I am cool, I'll keep my mouth shut, man. 23:30 Just whatever I got to do, let's do it. 23:32 And there it didn't worked out like I planned. 23:33 My lawyer kind of worked against me 23:36 and I was supposed to not get much time with all that money 23:39 you know public defender could have got me better than that. 23:42 So he worked against me 23:43 and I ended up getting 20 year sentence 23:45 and then they took everything from me. 23:47 And I decided, you know, the same work 23:51 and this lifestyle I'm living is not fun, 23:53 it's not what I thought is gonna be. 23:54 I want to change my way, 23:56 but man, this is kind of tough here and I'm miserable. 23:58 And the Lord had been dwelling with me 24:00 because I was raised in church. 24:01 Remember from 8-years-old now, 24:03 you know, I was raised in church so I rebelled in, 24:05 you know, going on my way. 24:07 Because I was just thinking as you're talking 24:08 as what is God gonna do to get through to you? 24:11 Right and my mother is there praying 24:13 and I got tons people praying and so the Lord was in control. 24:16 You know He was gonna work it out, 24:18 you know, but I was hardheaded 24:19 and I had to go this route and that route. 24:22 But, man, He had a plan, you know, He had plan for me. 24:25 And so I ended up lost all my privileges like I said, 24:29 I moved from this place to that place 24:30 all the maximum-security places and, 24:33 you know, then one day they just told me to pack my stuff 24:37 and you know I said where am I going they wouldn't tell me 24:41 and I ended up getting moved all the way to Virginia. 24:44 I was about is over by Richmond Virginia, they took me there. 24:48 And you know they just took me 24:51 and moved me up all the prison 24:52 just called interstate compact 24:54 and took me to Virginia, up haul a whole system 24:57 because they said that they wanted to through me off guard 25:00 is what the words they use. 25:02 Because they thought I was still hustling all this 25:04 and doing all this and so they wanted to 25:07 and there was you know they took it personal 25:09 because I wouldn't cooperate 25:11 and so they had move me so I go there 25:13 and I lose all my privileges again. 25:15 You know on the maximum-security. 25:16 Didn't know anybody? 25:18 Don't know nobody, but that's what I needed. 25:20 I needed to get away to works 25:21 because I thought I had to be somebody. 25:23 I thought I had to be cool and I had to hold this reputation. 25:27 But when I got to get away from everybody, 25:30 you know, I'm in a solitary cell 25:32 just with nobody around that I know 25:34 and just got to spend a lot of time to sit and think, 25:37 you know, and say man, this is what I want. 25:39 So they took me to super-max prison there at Level 6 25:43 and they're standing there with guns, 25:44 you know and shooting big rubber bullets 25:46 and these little pellets and I'm around all these people. 25:49 They brought all the lifers 25:50 because they blew a big hole out the mountain 25:53 and put this two super-max prisons there 25:55 and took all their lifers out there prison 25:58 and put them in there and-- 26:00 So just said even if you break out 26:01 you just gonna run into a mountain. 26:03 Yeah we're way up in the mountains, 26:05 miles up you know and always hill police, 26:08 you know, down there and they were just opening up this prison 26:11 and they are serious, you know. 26:13 And so here I am. 26:14 I happen to get sent from Indiana 26:17 to there right when they open up these prisons 26:19 and so they raise the point levels, 26:22 you know, because you got it by point system. 26:24 If you got more points more trouble, 26:26 then you go to higher level prison. 26:28 So I just hit at that wrong time. 26:31 You know I got there and they open this up 26:32 they want to fill them up, so they raise the point level. 26:35 You know, so with all my trouble it raised my points 26:39 and it send me to Level 6 super-max prison. 26:42 And while I was there though the Lord knew all the time, 26:45 He knew what He had in mind. 26:47 And when I got there, I was in miserable mess 26:49 you know the buddy above me my guy above me had 3,000 years. 26:55 You know, and guys around me they just had so many years 26:57 and here I am you know little teddy bear, 26:59 you know I got you know I am not real bad person, 27:03 I'm just trying to get high. 27:05 You know, I am just want to get high and that's what, 27:07 that's all I want to do you know, so here I am 27:10 and man, I had to do a lot of thinking while I was there. 27:12 And I looked around, I said is this what I want? 27:15 Because this is my not future, if I can continue to hustle 27:19 because I go full force when I do something 27:21 and I thought real hard about. 27:24 Lord was dealing with me 27:25 and man, I just been, I broke down 27:27 while I was there after I was there while about nine months. 27:30 Man, I just said, Lord here you got me. 27:33 You got me, man, you got me, I give. 27:35 And you know to that is a huge moment 27:38 because everything led up to that moment as I am broken, 27:43 I am done, I can't even carry this anymore. 27:46 I don't want to and I don't want this to be my life. 27:48 Right hunting piece and Lord is-- 27:51 You know, if you went to anywhere else 27:53 on the planet other than God. 27:56 They would say so I am so sorry but you got pay your time 28:01 you know that for everything that you did 28:05 but God doesn't do that to us. 28:06 It just an amazing thing is all of the sudden we turn to God 28:10 and what we get from God is 28:12 I am so glad that you have turn it over to me. 28:17 I love you and we'll be okay. 28:20 That's right and I needed Him at that time. 28:23 I was there, didn't know nobody, way away from home 28:26 and I was just-- I was at the end 28:29 you know, I said, man I got to do something. 28:32 Because I could have kept going 28:33 but where was I gonna go 28:35 how much further down can you go you know. 28:38 I'll never make it home or I'll die. 28:40 People when they were in ordeal and dying 28:42 and I am thinking man, that's next for me. 28:44 That is next and I knew it. 28:46 We're gonna take a break 28:47 because I know you brought a friend with you. 28:50 Yes. Also had a similar story. 28:53 I want to hear what Bryan has to say 28:57 and then I want to hear what you guys did with your journey 29:00 after you surrendered to God. 29:02 What does God do next 29:03 because right now it sounds little hopeless. 29:05 You're in a cell, maximum-security prison Level 6. 29:09 What does God do? 29:11 And what's amazing to me about what God does 29:14 as He steps in and changes everything 29:17 even when it appears incredibly hopeless. 29:20 So we will be right back, stay with us. |
Revised 2014-12-17