Participants: Cheri Peters (Host), James Moon
Series Code: CLR
Program Code: CLR000113A
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00:01 The following program discusses sensitive issues
00:03 related to addictive behavior. 00:04 Parents are cautioned that some material 00:06 may be too candid for young children. 00:10 Welcome to Celebrating Life in Recovery. 00:12 I'm Cheri your host and today I'm gonna introduce you to 00:15 good friend of mine Pastor Jim Moon. 00:17 Got an incredible story journey that 00:20 you're gonna be blessed by but also is gifted in music. 00:23 So he is gonna play a couple songs for us. 00:54 Welcome. 00:55 You know, there are times that I get to introduce you 00:58 to some really good friends of mine 01:00 and today is one of those times. 01:02 I'm gonna introduce you to Pastor Jim. 01:04 I've loved him from the time that I've met him, 01:06 his entire family is just incredible. 01:09 But before we get there, we have to talk about 01:11 what we're doing as far as the health message 01:13 on this segment and maintenance. 01:14 And it was really weird 01:16 that I'm looking at Celebrations and the acronym 01:19 and all of the things that come with that 01:20 and, you know, choices being the first part of the "C" 01:23 on Celebrations and exercise and environment and belief 01:27 and optimism and all that kind of stuff. 01:29 And I've got some leftover that are just really tough ones 01:32 like this one. 01:33 Today is on liquids and I wanted-- 01:36 I wanted to do liquids. 01:37 It's simple that we drink water. 01:38 I mean, if we didn't drink water 01:39 we would die, we would dehydrate. 01:41 A lot of our illnesses-- when you go into the hospital, 01:44 most of the time anybody that goes in the hospital 01:47 the first thing they do is they set you up on IVs 01:49 because most of us are dehydrated. 01:51 So water is really important but I want to look at that 01:54 on a spiritual sense because Jesus says, like He says, 01:58 "Come, if you're thirsty drink from Me" 02:01 it says in John. 02:02 It says in Isaiah 58 that we're like "watered gardens." 02:06 I mean, there is all kinds of stuff in there-- 02:08 in the Bible that talks about water 02:10 and spiritual thirst and the fact that God is 02:13 so ready to pour into us and meet that thirst within us. 02:16 So I want you to think about thirst in 02:18 that we got to drink more 02:20 and if you are out there I'm not saying soda, 02:22 Dr Pepper or tequila. 02:24 I'm saying water, drink more water. 02:27 And it's in my own recovery. 02:29 You know, I'm heroin addict in recovery. 02:30 I've got all kinds of stuff I'm trying to walk from. 02:33 I actually do want to be healthy and a woman of God, 02:36 I want to spiritually be able to use my mind in every way. 02:39 And most of the time, if you see me drink anything, 02:43 it's gonna be water. 02:44 I very seldom even drink anything else. 02:47 I mean that's juice, sodas whatever. 02:49 If I'm thirsty, I'll grab water now 02:51 because it's good for me. 02:53 That's the only reason and I finally get it 02:55 after 30 years of recovery. 02:57 So I'm not really fast 02:59 but when I get something I get it. 03:00 So I'm asking you if you can just drink water 03:04 and if you want to take that to a spiritual sense, 03:08 God says, "If you are thirsty, come to Him" 03:10 and literally He will pour into you 03:12 everything that you need in order to live. 03:15 And now I want to introduce you to my friend Jim. 03:18 I can't even believe you are on the program. 03:19 Give me a handshake. 03:21 I love you. I know it's studio. 03:22 All right. 03:23 But Pastor Jim Moon, we've known each other 03:27 for how long? 03:30 At least since 2002 is when you came to Wyoming. 03:33 Yes. 03:34 And I think you were there around 2000, the fall of 2000 03:37 and then I started year in 2001 03:39 at so called camp meeting. 03:40 So long time we worked together at women's retreats, 03:43 we worked together at teen retreats, 03:46 we've talked on the phone a ton, 03:49 you're wife Ingrid is just amazing. 03:51 You have three kids. Yeah. 03:53 What are you doing now? 03:54 I pastor in Southern Colorado 03:56 and so I'm involved in prayer ministry as well. 04:00 I'm gonna-- you know, I'm gonna tell a story, 04:03 you just said it that-- 04:04 I'm gonna tell a story about the funniest thing 04:07 I've ever seen as far as you in ministry 04:10 and I was working with this guy that was just a wreck. 04:15 Tattoo Jim a mess, angry, 04:19 I don't even know why God stuck him with us 04:21 because he was so inappropriate. 04:22 My friend, her child died and she buried him. 04:27 Died of methamphetamine overdose. 04:30 Not overdose but his heart explodes, he ends up dying 04:33 and she is crying about that 04:35 and this Tattoo Jim looks at me and says, 04:37 "Is she gonna whine about this the whole time." 04:40 And I'm like really, you're gonna say 04:42 she gonna whine about this 04:43 and we are driving down the freeway 04:44 and I'm supposed to be an evangelist 04:46 and I want to open up the truck 04:48 and just kick him right out of the road. 04:50 Like you know what, and I wanted to see him 04:52 bounced down the freeway. 04:53 I wanted to see him. 04:54 I'm like you are so mean 04:56 and I'm thinking as a woman of God, 04:58 should I even have those thoughts? 05:00 You know, I was so mad at him 05:01 and I'm the whole time saying God, 05:03 why do we have this guy with us for? 05:05 Why is he with us? 05:06 He is rude, he is-- 05:08 he says things that are just so insensitive 05:11 and he is drinking coffee and he is smoking his brains out 05:13 and he is not-- he is cursing them. 05:16 Why is he with us? 05:18 And God is just clearly saying because I love him. 05:21 Amen. Amen. I love him. 05:23 And I'm thinking but he is such a jerk, you know. 05:25 And I'm like-- so anyhow, so then we go and we do this 05:28 outreach in Wyoming. 05:30 We're staying at your house and he is just, 05:32 he is still a jerk, you know, but I hear him. 05:35 I'm in the kitchen with Ingrid and Tattoo Jim is with you. 05:40 And do you want to take the story from here? 05:43 Well, the first thing I remember about Jim is 05:45 he just had this dragon on his forehead. 05:48 A tattoo? 05:49 The first time I saw him I said, 05:50 "Hey, you've the mark of the beast." 05:54 In fact-- 05:56 And he didn't punched you which was amazing. 05:58 Yeah, but that whole experience like 06:00 with you being there in Wyoming and Jim 06:03 and that was kind of the first time 06:06 I was starting to kind of become awaken 06:09 to the whole world of recovery and the whole world. 06:12 I in my teen years what had happened was 06:16 I don't remember it was before or after you came to visit, 06:19 but there was a young man that had called 06:22 an adult phone line from our church 06:25 and so when he called the phone line 06:28 like, oh, no, what do we do? 06:30 And I called you and you recommended a couple of books, 06:33 a book called An Affair of the Mind, 06:35 that's a story of the woman who had her husband 06:37 with a sex addiction. 06:39 And then another book called the Addictive Personality 06:42 and then you said maybe you want to talk to the church 06:44 and give a sermon describing what addiction is. 06:47 So I read those two books, I'm thinking about 06:50 I had a kind of an idea that it was this kid 06:52 but I didn't know for sure 06:54 and so I decided to preach the sermon. 06:58 And I started to inventory my life, do I have any-- 07:01 what am I gonna get an illustration 07:03 or story about addiction 07:05 and what came to mind was my own struggle as a teen. 07:08 And I masturbated and kind of like the joke is that 07:16 99% of guys do it 07:18 and the 1% that say that they don't are lying. 07:21 And maybe not statically true but they are joke. 07:24 Yeah. 07:25 so I was 13 the first time that happened to me 07:29 and there was a lot of shame and guilt and I-- 07:33 as I got older and it was from about 13 to 24 07:38 and as I got older, I felt like wow, is this, 07:44 you know, I want to be a pastor 07:46 and I've got this junk in my life 07:47 and so there was a lot of shame 07:49 and when I was-- 07:50 You don't want to talk to? Yeah. 07:52 So I didn't feel like I could talk to anybody about it 07:55 because you know, I tried to hide it and whatever. 07:57 All right. 07:58 So finally I think God gave me the courage. 08:02 There were two things that started to change 08:04 my whole sense. 08:06 One was I started to open up to some people that I trusted. 08:10 I talked to my best friend, 08:12 a guy that I really looked up to spiritually. 08:14 You know, and I got to just say as I have to really say 08:17 was it Bernie? 08:18 No. 08:20 Now, what I got to say is that as a pastor 08:22 it's really tough to say I've got to open up 08:24 and get accountability 08:25 with people that I trust and love. 08:27 Because Satan will try to get you shamed 08:30 and quieter and quieter 08:31 and you end up getting lost in that shame 08:34 and that's sad. 08:35 Because you are man of God called for a purpose 08:38 and Satan just knows, if I can keep you quiet 08:40 in any area you like. 08:41 So devil is the voice that was put in my head, 08:43 you can't-- how can you be a pastor 08:44 when you got this junk. 08:46 And so I started to open up to a friend. 08:50 I talked to a guy at the seminary, 08:53 one of my professors and he reassured me. 08:56 He says I know a guy, he is over 40 08:58 and went back to that and God still working with him 09:01 and then I talked to my dad. 09:02 So as I started to experience grace 09:05 from the people around me 09:06 and then there was one other experience 09:08 that really stands out in my mind. 09:09 Marshal Kelly was an African-American preacher 09:11 who was doing a week of prayer and he said one time-- 09:15 he says, I was looking at my backyard 09:17 and I saw this tree out there and it was a winter time 09:20 and I said to the Lord loud, 09:21 Lord, why do you like the leaves hang, 09:23 the dead leaves hang on that tree? 09:26 And he says, the Lord spoke to me 09:28 and He said, Marshall, He says, 09:30 when the spring time comes 09:32 the new growth will force off the dead leaves. 09:36 And I started to weep because and my mind went to John 15 09:41 where Jesus says, "I'm the vine 09:43 and you are the branches. 09:44 If a man abides in Me and I in him 09:47 he will bear much fruit." 09:48 And I had this thing where even though 09:50 I had this cycle of acting out with masturbation, 09:55 feeling ashamed, 09:56 feeling I couldn't talk to God for a week 09:59 then finally kind of coming back 10:00 with my tail between my legs. 10:01 And, you know, I would said, you know, 10:05 if I'm lost I know that God loves me, 10:08 I know that-- I know about grace. 10:10 So if I'm lost, it's not gonna be 10:12 because of Him, that will be because of me 10:14 but I'm gonna just hold on to Him. 10:15 But regardless. 10:16 And so when Marshall said that 10:18 the new growth will force off the dead leaves 10:20 and I thought if John where he says, abide in me, 10:22 it was like, it was like God was saying through Marshall, 10:26 I've got you on this 10:27 and I will bring transformation and change. 10:30 Amen. 10:31 So then when this kid calls a porn line 10:35 and I read these books, I was like, okay, 10:37 so that was my kind of experience 10:38 with the whole addiction cycle 10:41 and I read different stuff about it 10:42 and some people say it's a sin, 10:44 others say no that's what young man go through 10:46 and there's all the developmental stuff 10:47 and whatever. 10:48 I just knew for me that it felt like it wasn't right, 10:52 it didn't feel right to me. 10:54 And I'm now looking back 10:56 I see that God gave me that experience 10:58 to give me empathy for people who battled darker addictions 11:01 and things that man, I'm like if I'm a wimp 11:04 if I had to deal with some of the-- 11:05 like what you dealt with I don't know if I'd make it. 11:08 But you know, what was really interesting to me 11:10 even with this kid is because 11:12 God has worked through that with you 11:15 and you decided to be honest with that with your own stuff, 11:19 you were able to talk to him so gently 11:22 and with so much grace, not to shame him. 11:24 Yeah. Yeah. 11:26 And so and there were others too 11:27 that God just opened the door 11:29 to be able to connect with and now, you know, 11:32 I'm doing a Bible study with a gal 11:35 whose mom like was an alcoholic 11:38 and she has to take medication 11:41 because she can't sleep in night 11:42 because she has posttraumatic stress from her mother 11:44 waking up her in the middle of the night, 11:46 beating on her and the other guy 11:47 who is a vet and I just-- 11:50 all these crazy problems and I grew up in a home where, 11:53 you know, a loving Christian family. 11:55 My mom and dad were married, 11:57 no real over the top dysfunction. 12:00 I though, I thought you were so perfect. 12:02 So now we got Tattoo Jim in his living room 12:05 and I'm in the kitchen and I'm with Ingrid 12:08 and now we say I was helping her make dinner. 12:10 I was actually talking, she was making dinner. 12:12 But I was in the kitchen 12:15 and I heard Pastor Jim say to Tattoo Jim, 12:20 you know, we all have problems, we all have issues 12:24 and Jim almost got in his space 12:26 like yeah, what's your issue? 12:29 And for a moment it was quiet, 12:31 but my ear was like so, 12:34 right there like, what is he gonna say? 12:36 Is he gonna honestly say something that's real 12:39 or is he gonna blow this guy off. 12:42 Because if he says something that's not real at this moment, 12:45 he will lose Jim spiritually and the respect 12:48 that he is gaining for you and he is already thinking 12:51 that you're vegan and you're weird 12:52 because he said you know, if I have to eat another salad, 12:55 I'm gonna go shoot myself. 12:56 I'm not a vegan by the way, I'm not even vegan so-- 12:59 Oh? No. No. No. 13:00 No, but you know, what he felt? 13:01 He said he felt like a salad tutor. 13:03 He said always, all I was doing was eating vegetables. 13:06 Could anyhow, so I mean, that's what I'm here. 13:08 So what did you say to him? 13:10 Because what you said to him was life changing for him. 13:13 Well, I guess I said what I just told you. 13:15 I mean, I don't remember that part. 13:17 I've remembered telling that to other people. 13:19 You said to him, because I was right there 13:21 with my ear right there and he says to Jim, 13:24 he says I had a problem with masturbation 13:27 and Jim is like oh, dude, nobody wants to hear that. 13:31 And it was so funny 13:33 because you have this hardcore guy that's a mess 13:37 and he is thinking, you know, 13:39 that's it, that's what you're gonna say to me. 13:42 And he gets up and he walks outside to go smoke 13:44 but it changed his life. 13:46 He said that moment changed his life 13:48 because he just so thought about that 13:50 that he is so far over on this side 13:53 that even those kind of things seem minor to him 13:56 because he is raping people, he is angry all the time. 13:59 He is going out and using and doing 14:01 horrible malicious things to people 14:03 and you are saying that and he is just like, 14:05 what is the deal there. 14:06 And but slowly he changes. 14:10 Within the next few days he asks us to pray for him 14:13 to come to Christ, all because you were just brave enough 14:17 not to just say, you know, what, 14:19 maybe 10 years ago I lied. 14:22 Do you know what I mean? 14:23 Oh, and that's a funny thing because when I did the sermon 14:25 and I shared that whole thing usually when you preach 14:29 people say, oh, that was wonderful, or good job, 14:31 pastor, or whatever or they will say, you know, 14:34 you really shouldn't have said that. 14:35 They didn't say anything it was like, 14:36 it went over the head. 14:37 But-- But his wife did say something. 14:39 His wife was like, so don't say that. 14:42 About six months later and I was so sick, 14:46 I kind of go to the other side of district 14:48 which is 90 miles away and preach. 14:50 I was throwing out and so Ingrid goes 14:52 and she takes this girl Michelle with her. 14:54 And Michelle is deceased now, but she was like-- 14:58 she was almost like the Mary Magdalene 15:00 of our congregation. 15:01 She was so in love with Jesus 15:03 but you know, was battling alcoholism, 15:06 had been married a couple of times and she-- 15:12 she says to Ingrid when they were driving over 15:14 to the other side of the district 15:15 as Ingrid took her with her. 15:16 She says when Jim shared his junk with a church 15:20 that gave me courage to go and get help in recovery. 15:24 Amen. 15:25 And so I was like, okay, God, and it started-- 15:28 and also started, you know, 15:30 when you are living in that shame 15:32 and you are living in embarrassment 15:35 of whatever your issues are, 15:37 you sometimes feel like does this have any meaning, 15:42 it just seems so senseless. 15:44 I mean, why can't I just get rid of this junk? 15:47 Yeah. 15:48 And what I realized now is that God redeems everything 15:53 and if we give Him our stuff, 15:55 not only will He deliver us from it 15:57 but then He will use it 15:58 to make us a blessing to the people 16:00 who are struggling with some of the same issues. 16:02 What I love about the name of Moses, 16:04 Moshe is when pharaoh's daughter 16:06 named him Moses. 16:08 She named him Moses and it means 16:09 I drew you out of the water. 16:11 And so that name, his identity was in his deliverance, 16:16 but his destiny was to be a deliverer. 16:19 Wow. 16:20 So he was drawn from the water but then-- 16:23 God comes along 40 years later 16:25 when he is at the end of himself 16:26 and he is like you got the wrong guy. 16:28 And he says now I want to take you 16:30 and I want to draw a whole nation 16:32 out of the water. 16:33 That's incredible. 16:34 And but you know, Satan will just get us to 16:37 just be silent. 16:38 Satan will say you know, what, no, no, no, just be silent 16:40 and God says please, it vindicates me 16:43 when you talk about the grace 16:45 that I've offered you in your life 16:46 and the transformation, 16:48 the sanctification all of that kind of stuff. 16:50 And I saw that with you and Jim, 16:52 I saw that not only with you and Jim 16:54 but shortly after that with your churches 16:56 you opened up. 16:57 I went to a lunch at your church 17:00 where you opened up the building 17:01 to these high school kids across the street 17:04 that they could come and talk about those issues 17:06 that they were stuck in. 17:07 And all to do with any issues but even sexuality, even porn 17:12 and all that kind of stuff. 17:13 And so I'm thinking, how cool is that? 17:15 You know, you get out of hiding 17:17 and all of sudden you can be more real 17:19 even in the community. 17:20 And I really think that sometimes we don't get that. 17:23 As God says we're at the end of the great controversy. 17:25 Don't hide right now. Yeah. 17:27 The demoniac wasn't asked to hide. 17:29 Right. Right. 17:31 And one of those kids that came to that lunch, 17:33 he was battling with his identity sexually, 17:37 relating to homosexuality 17:39 and his pastor had ministered to him. 17:41 I shared my own struggle. 17:43 He came to camp meeting, 17:45 not an Adventist kid but he came 17:47 and he shared his testimony and he shared his struggles 17:50 and you could have heard a pin drop. 17:52 And kids start to open up. 17:54 Different kids were sharing their testimonies 17:56 of that camp meeting about real stuff 17:58 that they were struggling with. 17:59 And there was a girl that approached me on Friday night 18:02 and she said, Pastor Jim, she said, when I was at school 18:05 one of my friends approached me and said, 18:06 why do you believe this Christianity 18:08 and stuff anyways-- 18:09 I mean how do you know that Jesus, 18:10 you know, wasn't gay and His disciples 18:12 were weird out and, you know, 18:15 how do you know it's even real at all. 18:16 This friend was saying to this girl 18:18 that's talking to me 18:20 and the lady I'll call here Suzy 18:24 and the girl that was talking to me was 18:27 Joanne not the real names. 18:29 But Suzy says to Joanne, I can give you a religion 18:31 that really has power. 18:32 You should check out this Wicca thing. 18:34 So Joanne starts to get involved with Wicca 18:38 and yet she is saying to me, 18:40 she says, but after I've heard the story of these kids here 18:43 this weekend she says, I want what they have. 18:46 This is real, Christianity isn't just some myth, 18:49 it is real, it is powerful as she heard their stories. 18:53 And so I was just-- I was still kind of just-- 18:56 it's kind of so real to think that 18:59 that thing which in a way it seems so minor 19:02 when you are talking to somebody like Tattoo Jim 19:05 or Michelle is battling alcoholism. 19:07 I mean, I masturbated, what's the big deal with that? 19:10 I mean, it seems so minor and yet God allowed me 19:13 to go through that experience, 19:15 minister to me in my own brokenness 19:17 and then has given me an opportunity 19:20 to be vulnerable in a way that allows 19:22 other people to start sharing. 19:24 It's incredible. 19:25 You know, we are talking about the sexual stuff 19:29 but you've also struggled with anger 19:31 and other things that are-- 19:34 isn't that finding more acceptable? 19:36 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They are just as damaging. 19:38 But, you know, its okay if you are angry, 19:39 but any of our sexual stuff we really have a hard time with 19:42 and we got to stop that. 19:43 I think right now when I-- 19:46 I just got back from Canadian University, 19:48 I probably shouldn't say the university 19:50 but we did a three part series on recovery 19:55 and I just talked about my husband's Brad's issues 19:59 with his actually now sexually as a kid 20:02 and the stuff that happened to him. 20:04 And when the last meeting was over 20:06 at 4:30 in the afternoon 20:07 I said to the kids if you want to stay 20:10 I'll stay until the last one leaves 20:12 and at 4:30 in the morning they kicked us out. 20:14 So we stayed 12 hours talking about these 20:17 very real issues that had them in bondage and shame 20:21 and they weren't leaving the building. 20:22 Does God still love me? 20:24 Absolutely. 20:25 But I think what if we don't talk about it. 20:27 Where are they gonna go for the answers 20:29 and either gonna go to places like Wicca 20:31 or gaming staff or the world to get the answers 20:34 when I really believed that God says, come to Me. 20:36 If you are thirsty come to Me 20:39 and I will give you the water of life. 20:41 You know, it's just like all of that stuff. 20:43 And there's that truism, 20:44 we're only as sick as our secrets. 20:46 Yeah. 20:47 And then I love the one in Psalm 90:8 where God says 20:51 Moses is writing and he says, "You set our secrets sins 20:55 in the life of your countenance." 20:57 Amen. That's powerful. 20:59 You know, I remember you saying one time 21:01 that we all have like threshold of what we can handle 21:05 in other people's lives. 21:06 God doesn't have a threshold. 21:08 There's nothing what I ever do that He doesn't go like this. 21:11 Amen. 21:12 All the time He's just like, you know, 21:15 give me the best you got and I'll transform it 21:18 through My glory and power and make you a new creation. 21:21 We'll get through this. Yeah. 21:22 We'll get through this, buddy. I love that. 21:24 I love that. 21:25 So what about the anger stuff? 21:26 You know, when you even said that 21:29 you dealt with anger cracked me up 21:31 because I thought oh, shut up, 21:32 there is no way you are-- 21:33 Oh, man, I still deal with it. 21:35 Okay, so what is it look like? What do you deal with? 21:37 And what does God say about it? 21:38 Well, I think what I've-- you know, 21:40 there is a Psalm that says, your gentleness makes me great. 21:44 In the Psalms there is another verse in Philippians, 21:48 you know, there's that one that says, 21:49 "Rejoice in the Lord always. And again I say, rejoice!" 21:51 And then there is-- and there is pray, you know, 21:55 "Don't be anxious for anything but in all things with prayer 21:58 and supplication with thanksgiving." 22:00 You know but coming straight in between that is this 22:03 Philippians 4:5 that says, 22:04 "Let your gentleness be made known to all. 22:06 The Lord is near." 22:08 And so Christ is inviting us to be gentle, not angry. 22:12 Amen. 22:13 To respond when we have anger and gentleness 22:18 and it's like a lifelong battle for me, 22:21 but you know, I one time when my son was young, 22:25 it kind of came to ahead, 22:26 I had some like these prospectuses 22:29 you get for investment or whatever, 22:31 I mean they are kind of flimsy like this, 22:32 but they are about that thick. 22:34 And on the same week I smacked him on the head 22:37 with those things, furious raging inside 22:41 and in that same week I pound him by the arms 22:44 and I pinned him to the airborne and said, 22:45 kid, if you don't stay but and then I realized 22:48 now if I don't shape up my kid's 22:49 not gonna want to talkto me when he is a teen 22:52 and I'm gonna lose him. 22:53 Yeah. 22:54 And so-- and I just I started to cry out to God and say, 22:58 "You have to do something." 22:59 And the funny thing was 23:00 even before Jay Jay my eldest was born 23:03 is God gave me the song it was like, 23:05 A gentleman and all you raise 23:07 with gentle hands and a tender face, 23:08 compassionate eyes, and a loving heart. 23:10 Truly you're gentleman. 23:12 So gentleman, take my life, 23:13 my heart and heart, my stubborn pride 23:15 and with one touch of your healing hand 23:17 make me a gentleman. 23:18 A gentleman in all my ways with gentle hands 23:21 and a tender face, compassionate eyes, 23:23 and a loving heart that my baby might be your gentleman. 23:27 So generationally that it will. 23:29 It's like God saved me from this anger 23:32 and if I don't have enough sleep 23:34 or if I'm running too hard, 23:37 I mean, the hardest thing for me now 23:39 is not to pastor, not to stand upfront, not to sing, 23:42 the hardest thing is to be present for my kids and my wife 23:45 and be the real deal at home. 23:47 True Christianity starts in the home. 23:50 And you got it. 23:51 You got it just even unfold that a little bit 23:53 because I think that that's what we lose in 23:55 is that God is saying 23:57 I'm not asking you for these big things, 23:59 the big things will come automatically 24:01 when you actually are present with the people you love. 24:04 Yeah. Yeah. 24:05 Present with me, with God. 24:07 Yeah. Yeah. 24:08 I mean, it's a constant battle 24:12 and all I don't have any great answers for it 24:16 other than just go to Jesus day by day. 24:18 I think it's the same thing 24:19 when I was dealing with masturbation 24:21 just going and saying Lord, 24:23 I'm amass with you just have your rain in my life. 24:26 And I love when you say that Pastor Jim, 24:29 because one of the things that that we try to do 24:33 is we get in inside and we think 24:34 we have to strive to now make it happen. 24:37 And you know, in the Bible God just says, 24:40 can an Ethiopian change the color of their skin, 24:42 you know, can a leopard change the spots on its body. 24:46 That you cannot in your best of the best reason 24:50 that you have you cannot bring yourself to a healthy place 24:53 but if you surrender to Me daily we'll get there. 24:56 Yeah. 24:57 So it is really a thing of saying being able to say God, 24:59 I'm powerless here. 25:01 No like any 12 set program that first recognizes 25:03 I can't do it. 25:04 I don't-- even my best thinking 25:06 I'm grabbing somebody by this road saying, stop, 25:10 you know we have to be nice. 25:12 You know, and God says 25:14 bring it to Me, surrender to Me. 25:16 That's really about dying daily 25:17 and Pavel Goia told us this great story recently 25:20 at gathering of prayer leaders. 25:21 He said, his dad took him out one time because he would-- 25:23 he grew up in a communist country 25:25 and he is feeling like, you know, upset 25:28 because his friends were making fun of him 25:30 because of his Christianity. 25:32 And his dad takes him out to this graveyard he says, 25:35 I want you to kick the grave 25:36 and he says no that's disrespect. 25:37 He says, no kick it. So he kicked it. 25:39 And then he says now I want to say something 25:40 rude and ugly to the person there. 25:44 He says, well, that's disrespectful. 25:45 He says, no say it. 25:46 And so he's like, you stupid, you stupid. 25:48 And then his dad said, what if the person say back? 25:52 And he said, well nothing. 25:55 And he says the reason you're offended is 25:56 because you're not dead yet. 25:59 That person is an offendant, they are dead, 26:01 they don't say anything. 26:03 You get upset, you get irritated, 26:04 you lose your cool whatever 26:06 because you're not dead yet. 26:07 And that's my prayers. 26:08 Lord, let me die. 26:10 Let me be dead to that flesh, 26:11 to my ownself and alive to Christ. 26:14 Yes, when I get anger let me just be dead. 26:16 Even though I'm angry because anger is an emotion 26:18 it comes, it goes but what do we do 26:21 with our anger is a question. 26:22 Amen. 26:23 We're gonna, we're gonna take a break 26:25 but Jim, when we come back, 26:26 you know, you wrote a song that is my favorite song 26:30 and could you open up the next segment 26:32 with that song? 26:33 Yeah, sure. 26:34 Jim is a songwriter, incredible stuff 26:36 and you know pastor, but one of the gifts he has is, 26:40 is putting his journey into music. 26:42 And so we're gonna come back with that song 26:44 and stay with us. 26:45 You're gonna love the rest of the story. |
Revised 2014-12-17