Participants: Cheri Peters (Host), Dahiana Jenkins, Damien Jenkins
Series Code: CLR
Program Code: CLR00061B
|
00:14 Welcome back!
00:15 I have got to say, first of all I want to say Diana 00:18 thank you for joining us. 00:19 I know that you have a testimony of your own. Yes! 00:24 But before we get into that I have to finish up. 00:26 I know what you are saying I came into a relationship 00:31 with Christ, not even with Christ, 00:35 I'm looking at the Bible and realizing that this love is huge 00:38 I want to know did that change you right away? 00:42 Well how did you respond to even getting a taste of that? 00:47 It definitely did not take place overnight. 00:49 I had what we call a conviction and it was just a mental 00:56 understanding that this made sense. 01:00 That this love that I was seeing in here by His actions, 01:04 really expressed something that I never understood before. 01:08 The were things that were contrary to my life. 01:10 So as time progressed I still sold drugs at that time. 01:14 When I realize these things I stopped. 01:16 I stopped, I still smoked myself but I stopped selling it. 01:21 As time continues to progress another year I stopped 01:24 with the alcohol as well. 01:26 But I remember... Can I ask you as you are getting 01:33 into this relationship you are feeling you know what, I'm 01:36 not going to be selling drugs, I am not going to be doing 01:40 that stuff, did you, why did that happen? 01:44 Did you read and just? get a conviction 01:46 Or did you feel like the Holy Spirit just saying... 01:49 It was just an understanding I had not read the whole Bible. 01:53 Or anything for that matter, it was just an understanding 01:57 that I couldn't keep doing these things because these were 02:00 things I was doing prior to understanding what this life 02:05 was like and I knew these things would prohibit me 02:07 because they were contributing to the way I felt, to the way 02:11 I was prior to me seeing this love. 02:14 So I did not want anything to do with them anymore. 02:16 I knew I had to cut them out. 02:18 It took about a year. So I just want to say 02:21 for somebody that does not know how God works 02:23 because I think it is the coolest thing that God slowly, 02:27 As soon as we even get a clue of who He is, and ask Him into 02:30 our lives our heart's cry is please don't leave me like this. 02:34 Please change me and He starts before we can even ask Him. 02:41 I don't even know what to ask for now and the 02:42 Holy Spirit says, you know what, I do. 02:44 Know that it is going to set you free and He starts that 02:47 before our mouth is even moving to ask for that. 02:49 He just start picking things out for me because I didn't know 02:53 what to start with. 02:54 I had anger problems, I had was involved with certain women 02:58 You were taught to look at races in different ways because 03:02 of your dad. 03:03 I mean it is like I could see all that stuff and God says 03:06 you know what, I love you for even looking at Me. 03:08 That's right and I found that when I started studying and 03:12 actually got into the Bible and started looking through 03:15 the passages, it literally would just find a verse to 03:20 counter the verse I heard in the rap music. 03:23 That it will completely discounter it. 03:25 Can you think of one right now can you give us an example? 03:28 okay, I have one, the one that says any means necessary 03:34 what ever the cause, even if it means that lives are lost. 03:35 In other words I'm going to do what I have do, even if 03:37 somebody else has to pay for it. 03:39 Jesus says that, how can I put this? 03:43 He would say things that without Me you can do nothing. 03:47 You can't do anything, but with Me you can do all things. 03:51 I am the vine and you are the branches. 03:52 So as the branch cannot grow fruit by itself, 03:57 unless it is connected to the vine how can I make this 04:00 a possibility? I can't! I can't, I can't do it. 04:04 So everything that was stored in your mind from rap music 04:08 and all that stuff, is that you were using Scripture to 04:11 It was completely countering every single one. 04:14 In fact, it was so prevalent that I had to have some type of 04:19 Scripture music because I was very involved with this music. 04:22 I had started a record label of somewhat and then 04:26 it never got started because of some very controversial 04:30 issues that involves some people getting hurt really bad. 04:32 I literally had to... I like the way you have to say 04:36 that so nicely. Right! Right! Right! 04:37 I guess because I'm somewhat from that kind of background. 04:44 The way you said that was so nice, I thought how 04:46 sweet is that. 04:47 It was terrible, it was terrible. 04:48 It was horrible and people got hurt and you had 04:50 to fold everything. 04:53 and God is saying put Scripture to Music. 04:55 Because that is what you know well. 04:57 I hated that music when I first heard it. 05:00 it was scripture songs and I hated them. 05:03 It sounded so bland, folky. Lame! They were boring. 05:07 But one of them stood out called To Everything There is a Season. 05:11 Just one of them and I kept playing it over and over. 05:14 All of a sudden I started to appreciate the rest of them. 05:15 Because I started to experience the Scriptures in my life 05:18 in my experience. 05:20 Your desires actually change? The desires changed. 05:22 How do you explain that? I had desires for something 05:26 that I had never had a desire for. 05:27 Only God can do that. Only, it would have to be. 05:31 Where did I start? I don't know. 05:34 When I was trying to get off of heroin somebody put me 05:38 with drawing, somebody put me in the living room and put some 05:42 Christian music on and it was like fingers on the chalkboard. 05:44 I'm thinking can you shut that off? 05:46 So it is like when you come from the world everything about 05:51 spirituality almost is beyond what you can even listen to. 05:56 The Holy Spirit just takes us so slowly until we actually feel 06:02 like I can actually feel healed by that. 06:05 That's right, it is, it sounds horrible that music. 06:09 That is because the nature we have compared to what I 06:13 listened to before. 06:15 How did you do that because somebody is going to be watching 06:17 and say how do you fight through that, do you just stick with it? 06:20 I had to discard the rest of the music I was listening to because 06:25 the Bible, I would have kept listening to it and trying 06:27 to follow the Bible I would have kept feeding that nature 06:32 that was I was accustomed to already. 06:35 So you are already accustomed to the taste of it, and you 06:40 are trying to taste something new, the old one is going to 06:42 overlap the new one that you're taking. 06:43 capsule I completely took them all, they were all new CDs. 06:47 I bought them and threw them right in the garbage. 06:49 I had to make that decision to throw them in the garbage. 06:52 I knew I could not keep listening to them anymore. 06:54 That is when God really start working in my life. 06:58 Because my mind was clear now without those evil thoughts 07:02 that they were producing. 07:04 I had the opportunity, I made the decision to go and get 07:08 baptized in 2005. 07:10 I was so scared, I never understood Christians, 07:13 I never knew what a Christian person look like, what they were 07:15 And now you are one. 07:17 No not even yet, I'm going to visit them and I'm scared 07:20 because they do not know what they are like. 07:21 To me the one who was robbing people, 07:23 I'm scared of Christians. 07:24 I'm thinking they are strange, what do they like? 07:28 So I went up to Maine to get baptized because those were 07:31 When you said scared I just have to unfold that for somebody 07:34 Palm's sweating, heart pounding kind of scared? 07:38 Look I had some strange thoughts because of movies 07:41 they were a cult, I don't know what, I'm just talking 07:44 about a Christian in general I'm not talking about a 07:47 certain denomination, I didn't know what they were like so it 07:50 was very different for me. 07:52 I had wanted to go visit them by myself, in Maine 07:54 these are the people who studied with me, 07:55 they gave me the book actually, 07:57 and they even gave my brother-in-law. 07:59 I had got baptized in 2005 in a lake in New Hampshire. 08:04 That is where God got things moving for me because He had 08:08 given me the opportunity to visit a Christian college. 08:12 I was my third year high school I was about to go 08:16 to the next one. 08:17 I saw that Christian college, I did not want to go back 08:19 to finish high school because of all the influences of the 08:22 things I had just came from I did want to go back. 08:26 I felt that this was a refuge right here and I was safe here. 08:30 But I said let me pray about it that was something I had never 08:33 done really before. 08:34 Exactly check with someone else. Check with some one else. 08:36 I can't see, but God had been leading me thus far. 08:42 I just love the way you said that, I can even see, I mean 08:45 who am I checking with? 08:47 But his word was there and I knew it was certain because it 08:50 was coming from the past my life I wasn't just believing it by 08:53 I had no evidence, it was evidence, evidence, evidence 08:56 after evidence after evidence in my life. 08:58 the things that were happening I would ask for and they 09:01 would really happen, they were really happening. 09:03 I had prayed about it said Lord what do you want me to do? 09:07 He said, go back to the high school. 09:10 I said yeah, high school? 09:13 You know the influence. 09:16 Yeah I was like, am I really sure? 09:19 Be said go back. 09:21 I started thinking about it and said, He started to show 09:26 me, I'm not saying that people are not doing this, but they 09:30 was nobody ever came up to me and said, this is what God has 09:34 to offer, this is what the Bible has to offer. 09:35 They gave me a pamphlet here and there but you could tell 09:39 they weren't real serious about it. 09:40 They were just doing it for a job and I would take it 09:42 and throw it, but there was never nobody that took an 09:44 tell what is really going on. 09:45 There is nobody to interact with me, who was a Christian. 09:48 God was showing me that I have to do it. 09:51 I have to be the first one to do it. 09:53 There's nobody, there was plenty of people in that 09:56 Christian college in that area, but where I lived right here in 10:00 this dangerous place there was nobody doing these things, 10:03 showing people like me where we needed to go. 10:06 I mean there is a love that is really, real. 10:09 Then I said I will do it Lord. 10:11 If You will lead me I will do it 10:12 I went back to that high school and with the faith I had 10:17 at the time, it was small, but it was large though. 10:19 I started preaching, I never talked, I used to talk about rap 10:25 on the corners and things like that, but now I was using 10:30 that speech to reach people. 10:31 To reach people and people came out. 10:34 People came out. 10:35 Were you surprised that they wanted to hear it? 10:37 That they wanted to hear it? 10:38 I'm not surprised at all because I recognize, even though they 10:43 had not gone through exactly what I have been through, 10:47 the center of their desires was the same, it was to have a 10:50 belonging, of belonging somewhere. 10:52 Why have you chosen me? Why am I here in this life? 10:56 science tries to explain these things through evolution that 10:59 the survival of the fittest, which I strongly believed then 11:02 but it didn't fit, it didn't make sense. 11:05 It didn't make sense at all. 11:07 So in high school that is where you guys met? 11:09 Yeah! To me what is really interesting is that when he 11:14 came back you had know him prior so he was kind of a bad guy. 11:17 Yeah! So were you doing drugs, were 11:21 you doing the same thing? 11:22 Well actually it is funny, because I did drugs, I sold 11:26 drugs, but outside of school we never hung out. 11:29 So it was funny because we were like really in school friends 11:32 and oh you guys should go out because you look so cute 11:35 together, and we're like, whatever. 11:36 So we were like really good friends, but it was like we 11:40 never went any farther and now I thank God because we probably 11:42 would have never be in the situation we are right now. 11:44 Getting married and doing it the right way. 11:47 I like when you said the right way! Because in that lifestyle 11:54 nothing is the right way. No it is not. 11:55 So it would have been all jumbled up so God has a plan 11:59 for everything. So when he came back and was all converted I was 12:02 like okay, this is cool you know. 12:03 I had like Christian friends and all that?!?!?! 12:07 I was like, I didn't put it off, like Oh no God! 12:10 I was like Okay so. Did you have some of that 12:13 in your background? Yeah I was like quote unquote 12:16 Catholic when I grew up, but I would be in the clubs 12:19 on Saturday, go to church on Sunday. 12:21 So then he stated telling me about the Bible and stuff. 12:24 I was like yeah, I believed in the Bible because I believe 12:28 in God, I use to pray when I was deep in a hole and stuff 12:31 like that and then I asked questions. 12:35 Wait, wait, what was that prayer God if you can get me out of 12:36 this one... I'll never do it again. 12:38 I know that prayer. 12:40 Your back the same week doing the same thing. Exactly! 12:43 Then I asked some questions... You know what is funny? 12:46 That God even honors that. 12:47 I know! Because He loves us. 12:48 It is so beautiful and so messed up how we are, like I won't 12:51 do it again because God just got me out of this one. 12:53 So He can get me out of another one, but I just asked some 12:57 questions and tried to stump him all the time. 12:59 Like I am going to ask him more questions and he is not going 13:01 to know the answer. 13:02 Did you know she was doing that? 13:03 Yeah! but God prepared me, I had no prior experience with the 13:12 Bible, just one year. 13:14 I was able to answer thoroughly all those questions. 13:17 Praise God! I thought he was amazing. 13:19 I thought he had something up his sleeve and 13:20 just read something. 13:25 So in this high school it was like your first, like when you 13:30 talk about the demoniac, that Christ heals all of the demons 13:33 come out, and because I want you to go back and tell them. 13:36 So He is like I want you to tell them, go back and tell them 13:39 so that was your first evangelistic gig? 13:41 That was it! 13:42 That was in high school and just finish out with a bang. 13:46 Everybody who did not know me prior to the way I use to be 13:49 a lot of people knew what I did and how I handled myself, 13:53 everybody in that high school knew me afterwards for doing 13:56 the work of God. 13:59 I had a public speaking class open forum, my teacher was 14:04 blown away and she was just blown away. 14:06 She couldn't believe atheist, Muslims in that class 14:09 and the things that I would speak would just reach out 14:12 to everybody. 14:14 So when you say the atheist and Muslims it didn't matter to you 14:16 where somebody was coming from because what you were saying 14:19 was that the hole is the same? Exactly! it is not that, Oh this 14:23 is right and yours is wrong, that is not the case here. 14:26 But the case is, where is the real desire? 14:30 Where's the real love here found and that is what everybody 14:33 is looking for. Where my going to get the 14:35 the good from? I knew this was it because how it 14:40 worked in my life. 14:41 That's how I knew for a fact and she recognized it too. 14:44 Okay we are so, well I wish we had more time we're running 14:49 out of time so we will introduce a couple people, well I will 14:53 just open it up for questions. 14:54 We want to introduce a couple people on the set. 14:58 Let's start right over here. Well my name is Edwin Cotto 15:01 this brother was a prayer answered in my life. 15:05 In what way? Well I grew up in a similar 15:08 background and when time came in my life where I had to drop 15:13 everything, included dropping my friends and when I dropped 15:19 them I felt what now? 15:22 I'm all by myself doing this on my own I need some encouragement 15:26 I need some encouragement and God just worked the pieces. 15:30 What I used to do would go online in chat rooms and meet 15:34 friends there and that was all I had. 15:36 One friend of mine, I was explaining him my situation 15:40 and he ask me where do you live? I said I live in Jersey. 15:45 He said wait a minute and he got in contact with some other 15:48 people and all of a sudden I got a phone call. 15:51 Because you lived in New Jersey? That's right! 15:54 He lived in Jersey not too far for me maybe 8 or 9 miles 15:57 from me and when he called me I just thank God. 16:01 My prayer was answered. 16:05 Because there is, like when you were talking about going into 16:08 recovery and into Ministry, even though you are learning 16:12 all this you need friends around you. 16:15 That's right! 16:16 You had a lot of friends from the street when you were dealing 16:17 and hanging out on street corners and rapping 16:19 and that stuff and now you are a Christian, like now I'm lonely. 16:23 I'm by myself and so I just had the faithful and say, well, Lord 16:27 if You want me to do it You will provide the laborers. 16:30 I know the harvest is ripe and You are going to provide it. 16:34 I went back to high school, I had 3 other friends that 16:37 became converted because of me witnessing to them. 16:40 My wife was the fourth one. 16:42 now I met this brother over here, Edwin and we had a 16:47 whole group now. 16:49 That is too fun, so Edwin what you are saying to is that 16:53 he lifted you up as much as you lifted him up? 16:55 Yeah, because my hope was to convert my friends that I had 16:58 with me in the streets, and so I tried to witness to them 17:02 and they do not want to hear that. 17:04 Because it is foolishness to them. 17:06 It is, they did not want to hear anything and I would give them 17:10 books and talk to them or invite 17:12 them and it just wasn't going to happened so when 17:16 he came around and I met his friends, I had more friends 17:19 and it was incredible and that's when we started. 17:22 We got started. Actually from that point on 17:24 which was really fun, is that you guys started doing ministry 17:29 as a team, it started forming something. 17:32 That's right! Do you think God had a plan? 17:36 I mean I would have to say I could have been in that 17:39 Christian college training to be a missionary that I had planned 17:45 for me instead He sent me back to this high school and these 17:51 friends I met, that were converted, I did not know them 17:54 prior to that time. 17:57 So it is not like I knew them for years. 17:59 I've only known this man for about 3 years. 18:01 since I've been converted and yet we have become so close. 18:05 Close as a unit we became, we worked well together. 18:08 We have the same mindset and we just wanted to reach people 18:12 with what God had reached us with. 18:14 The same way He did it for us. 18:16 so we continued to do things like go to parks, set up 18:20 programs, cooking classes, food, and I invited all my old 18:24 friends from projects. 18:25 I think how funny is that, cooking classes and I am like 18:29 alright I am listening as you were listing those things and 18:33 thinking, cooking classes? 18:34 You would be surprised, surprised, they all came. 18:37 They were drugged up that same night I told them. 18:40 They were drugged up and I prayed, our health message is 18:46 so it draws, I mean it draws. 18:49 Because somebody left and they don't even know what health 18:51 message means. 18:52 What did he just say? What health message? 18:54 What you are saying is that it matters what you put in your 18:57 mind and your body and you were trying to teach that even? 19:00 Exactly and they all, that is exactly what we were teaching 19:04 because it... It killed me to learn to 19:06 drink water. Give me tequila but water has an awful taste. 19:10 can I mean I had to really train myself. 19:12 No, it was like that with a lot of my friends because they still 19:16 smoked and their taste was perverted and like you said with 19:20 the water they were supplying that with Hennessy. 19:23 So this was obviously there but I showed them, come to this 19:28 class at this park and see what we have to offer you. 19:32 So you are 20, 21 years old. 19! 19 I love that! 19! 19:35 How could I not love you? 19:38 How could you not love him? 19:40 I so understand why you do. You wouldn't love me if you 19:42 like me before I was converted. 19:44 I couldn't stand people like me the way I am now, but God 19:49 just completely flipped like a fraction He flipped it. 19:53 Now they all came and they asked me, when are you going 19:57 to do another one? 19:58 Cooking class? Cooking class! 20:00 Or anything because they are hurting inside, deep down 20:04 a lot of us knew what we were going through, even though it 20:08 seemed cool, it was in, this was our environment and we 20:12 didn't want to be like this. We saw that the only conclusion 20:14 did this with death or prison. 20:15 There's nothing out, there's nothing in his life for us. 20:20 So we took something that the Bible offered that was sure, 20:25 it was wonderful, I mean a crown in heaven? 20:28 We don't deserve a crown, I will take it and thank you 20:31 eternal life, I wanted that in the world. 20:33 But I wanted to have that in sin though. 20:35 But now he has given it to me in peace. 20:38 And actually love that you never experienced, it yours now. 20:42 It's mine, it's mine. To laugh out loud, 20:44 to feel good in your own skin. 20:46 To not be worried about somebody harming me. 20:49 Stabbing me, robbing me, it's the threat is still there, but 20:54 now the only difference is I have a refuge in Christ. 20:59 That is the difference now. 21:00 That's huge. That is huge because He is 21:02 bigger than all of us. 21:04 Somebody asked me one time are you afraid to go what ever 21:07 place, in prison or in with a gang infested area? 21:12 Are you afraid, and I am thinking I am walking in with 21:14 God himself and I don't feel afraid. 21:17 I think that if God wasn't working out with somebody 21:20 I wouldn't be walking in. 21:21 So you do have that sense of being, God has got my back 21:24 on this one. That's right! 21:25 I read that verse in the Bible where it says the Angels of the 21:29 Lord encamped around about them that belief and 21:32 trust in the Lord. 21:33 I'm like whoa that is serious, before I came walking through 21:37 these streets and I'm not afraid because I had a knife or gun 21:41 on me, but now I have nothing on me and I am not afraid. 21:46 I have no weapon. 21:48 During all that time, so you are meeting with Edwin and you 21:52 guys are doing ministry in the street together, cooking 21:57 classes, you have your friends, people around you, during 22:01 that time you guys fall in love and Marry? 22:02 Yeah! Right! Sounds so nice. 22:06 How's that, was that not so nice? 22:09 Yeah it was actually. Good! It was! 22:11 So give us a little bit, we love hearing that stuff. 22:17 So romantic. You want to share, Okay! 22:19 It was funny because neither of us was actually thinking this is 22:27 the guy for me, or the person I am going to marry. 22:28 I had just got out of a really bad relationship months ago, 22:34 so I wasn't going to be with anybody. 22:35 I got to a point where I was really happy being by myself. 22:38 Cause you always know how it is in the world, you need to 22:41 date somebody, you need to be with this person just to have 22:43 that comfort with the other person and it makes 22:46 you feel good. 22:47 When I make God it was like I feel that comfort. 22:52 So God fulfilled that for you? Yes! So I need that. 22:56 How am I going to be with some body who provides that comfort? 23:00 When it is still going to be empty, because I am still going 23:02 to be wanting for something. 23:04 That is what happens to a lot of people in relationship, their 23:06 still wanting it, that is why they keep moving on. 23:09 So when I got that with Christ, I was like so happy. 23:13 I don't need anybody, then my husband caught my eye. 23:17 Will you know what is incredible when you say that, because 23:20 a lot of women will never understand that until they 23:22 surrender to God. 23:23 It is like we constantly choose relationships out of need, and 23:26 God says don't do that. 23:28 Let me fill that need and I will bring your husband to you. 23:31 That's right! He did! 23:32 Yeah, He did it, because it was the farthest thing 23:35 from my mind that this guy I knew from high school 23:38 when we had English class together and we actually 23:41 did a play together and I was his wife 23:42 in the play we did. 23:43 No way! Oh how funny is that? In 9th grade. 23:45 I was Julius Caesar. Did anyone video that? 23:47 I would love to just keep that video. 23:49 Please, I would throw it away. 23:50 It was very cheesy, but we got the highest grade. We did! 23:56 It was real nice and I was like 24:01 we actually at first did not want to be together because 24:05 we had all these other people that we were with. 24:07 We didn't want to seem like, Okay now we're together would 24:10 separate the group like that and we didn't want to make 24:14 it feel awkward for people. 24:15 So for a long time we were not going to date, we are not 24:17 you know what I am saying? 24:19 Then it was just like, I think God really does want us to be 24:21 together and from there we started dating and stuff and 24:27 got married after awhile. 24:28 It was just strange in itself, because I was never planning 24:32 to get married, ever, ever, I had such a dislike for women 24:35 in the sense that I would not let them get to close because 24:39 the environment I grew up in they were very treacherous. 24:42 Everybody played everybody. 24:44 It wasn't just the women, the men, they had a good reason 24:47 because the men that they were with prior to them being 24:50 treacherous played them out so they were all like that. 24:53 So I never kept them too close to me, but He just brought it 24:58 together, because I did not plan that at all. 25:00 God heals all that. 25:02 You have a beautiful child. Yeah! 25:03 He's just delightful. 25:06 To me it is amazing when God says, not only will I bring 25:11 healing, and I want you to go 25:13 tell someone, and I want you to bless other people. 25:16 I also want to bless you and your home in your family. 25:20 I want to say we have to end this segment so I will say 25:23 thank you for being on the program, but before we end 25:26 I want you to introduce Jeffrey because I want Jeffrey to come 25:33 to come in and sing a song that really meant something to you. 25:35 so set up the song and introduce Jeff and we will take off. 25:40 Well Jeffrey is and amazing person because he, I met him 25:45 without actually meeting him until recently 25:47 When I was going through a hard time in my Christian walk, 25:51 I started to forget why I was doing what I was doing. 25:55 In reaching out to people hard times were coming, trials 25:59 and they were really testing me. 26:01 I had gotten a CD in the mail, from a friend of mine who knew 26:06 I was going through these issues 26:07 and she sent me $20 for my baby because my baby was born and 26:10 I had no job at the time. 26:12 That CD was there and I put it on, I don't know why I did it. 26:16 I just put it on. 26:17 The song I heard, the name of the CD was 26:21 Why Have You Chosen Me? 26:23 It brought back to my mind the very things that I had started 26:31 to do and why I started to do mission. 26:33 It's going to be cool so I half to say we are going to come back 26:36 and I want to start with that song just because it is amazing. 26:39 We will talk again we come back. 26:42 Stay with us! |
Revised 2014-12-17