Participants: Cheri Peters (Host), Martin Weber
Series Code: CLR
Program Code: CLR00074B
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00:15 Welcome back, I want to start, we were talking about the
00:18 book we are giving out this season. 00:20 'Pressing In' by Shelley Quinn and I want to say that 00:23 there is really an important thing about learning to 00:26 ask God and when someone uses a learning to pray 00:30 I didn't know what that meant. 00:31 I was so new, but on Philippians 4:8, 9. 00:35 I love this concept because it says, and now dear 00:40 brothers and sisters, let me say one more thing, I close 00:44 this with fixing your thoughts on what is true, 00:47 honorable, right, think about these things, what ever 00:51 it is pure, lovely, admirable, think about these 00:53 things, whatever's excellent, what is worthy of praise. 00:58 I want to paraphrase that, and say when you start to 01:01 change, really ask God, or ask the people around you to 01:05 really check you up about what you think about, 01:08 what you let run in your head. 01:10 If I'm going to change, I'm going to change everything. 01:13 Like the Bible says to renew your mind, literally allow the 01:18 Holy Spirit to come in and help you to be different completely, 01:22 don't allow yourself, I don't have the luxury 01:25 that some people have to just think about negative things 01:27 and let it just run in their heads. 01:29 Because if I do that I want to escape and when I escape 01:32 I go to my addictions, so I have to really say God teach 01:35 me to think good thoughts. 01:37 Teach me to go outside and take a deep breath and enjoy 01:40 looking around, teach me that kind of stuff. 01:42 As an addict I want to just say, let Him teach you. 01:45 If you don't know how to let Him teach you, get a 01:49 sponsor, a Pastor, a church group, join someplace where 01:52 somebody is going to confront you all those things. 01:55 Now I'd like to introduce you to the buzzard. 01:58 The first time I saw poster of this guy, they literally 02:01 had him shaped as a buzzard. 02:03 So I want to say, thank you Mark for joining the program. 02:06 Tell us about that and how you got that nickname. 02:09 Well it has nothing to do with my diet first of all. 02:11 - okay good, because you're vegetarian? 02:14 Yeah, it has been 40 years since I've had lunch with 02:17 Ronald McDonald and has nothing to do with the way 02:20 I treat people as well. 02:23 It has to do with actually a police dispatcher named me, 02:28 she named me that because every time, as a chaplain, 02:33 they had a coroner situation they would call for me. 02:38 I had developed a specialty for doing that as a chaplain. 02:41 So they would say hey, send for the buzzard. 02:44 So every time someone died, killed themselves, 02:46 was murdered, you got a phone call? 02:50 Yeah, I was the go to guy if I was available. 02:54 Now of course the buzzard, law enforcement officers 02:59 have to live with the sadness all of time so they 03:04 developed a gallows humor and so, the buzzard. 03:08 - very funny because that's what I thought, 03:12 if something was dead, you were there. 03:14 Yes, I was there. 03:16 So I want to find out before we even get to what you 03:21 did for a living, I want to find out who you are? 03:25 I love to figure out how did God lead somebody, 03:29 what was your journey like. 03:30 You never got into chemical addictions or 03:34 any of that stuff, hey? - None of what you would 03:37 categorize normally as addictions. 03:40 With me my addiction had to do the approval of people. 03:43 - That is a huge one though! 03:45 Oh yes, to this day I struggle with it all the time, 03:48 to find my identity in what people think of me instead 03:52 of what God thinks of me. 03:53 What's interesting is I wrote a book, 'A Miracle From 03:57 the Street' about coming out of all those addictions. 04:00 Sometimes I will be speaking in a church and people that 04:04 have such incredible back- grounds will say I so related 04:07 to that and I'm thinking how? 04:09 It's that sense of wanting to fit in or belong and all 04:13 those kinds of insecurities. 04:14 So that is as binding as any addiction. 04:17 Absolutely, I deal with it everyday. 04:19 I have to discover again who I am. 04:21 - and believe the truth about yourself? 04:24 - yes, exactly! - it's huge. 04:25 But you are okay? - yeah, it's like as a child growing 04:32 up, my dad, should I get into this right now? 04:34 - we love this stuff. 04:36 My dad was a war hero, he was a war hero. 04:39 He won a Silver Star in World War II defeating the Nazis. 04:43 He came back and married a German war bride and brought 04:46 her back to the United States and figured hey, this is a 04:49 great way to raise a family, it won the war. 04:51 So force and fear you know. 04:54 So he, in his Bible, he actually crossed out grace and 04:58 put works, and crossed out love and put fear 05:02 there in his Bible. 05:04 He raised us that way so we were afraid of him, afraid of 05:06 God, afraid of everything. 05:08 - what is really tough for me hearing you, is that there 05:12 is a part of him, I'm sure, thought he was do the right 05:16 thing, that I love my son and I want to stand him up. 05:19 I want him to be a man. 05:21 Yes, he thought he was helping us to do just that but 05:26 instead we were all very fear to this day is the predominant 05:31 characteristic that I have, it is my default thing and 05:35 unless I am filled with the Spirit and I can remember who 05:39 I am and who God is that I can face it with confidence. 05:42 Otherwise fear has it. 05:45 - when we talked about the whole radar thing where you 05:46 get stuck at, that's where you get stuck at? 05:48 Yes exactly. - not being afraid of getting stuck there 05:50 now I know I have turn this over. 05:52 Sure exactly. - because that is not the truth of my 05:55 existence. - that's right it's true. 05:57 Growing up like that must've been really tough. 06:00 Yea, we ran away, my mom took us away seven times, 06:04 but she always ran out of money and we had come home. 06:07 In my life, 22 times, I counted them the other day. 06:12 22 times we moved because somebody was either mad at us 06:16 or we couldn't pay the rent, or something, 06:19 we were on the run I guess. 06:21 A person would call us White trash can just always 06:26 unable to settle down. 06:29 The depth of how that, in our own mind, not in God's 06:35 mind, in our own mind identifies us. 06:37 This is who I am, this is whom I'm always going to be. 06:42 That is such an incredible addiction and hard to get 06:46 out of, because then we see the world and anything that 06:49 validates that view we pull into our lives. 06:52 So how did you get out of that? 06:56 Because you know I wish I could say, wish I could say 06:59 it in a deeper way because I don't think people realize 07:03 that is in every fiber of your body. 07:05 You are really checking whether you are safe no matter 07:09 where you are at, whether I fit in where I'm at, 07:11 what people are thinking about me where I'm at, 07:14 it is so much in your fiber and coming out of that is 07:17 more of a miracle than, I think parting the Red Sea. 07:20 Somebody says God parted the Red Sea and I thought I saw Him 07:23 change a life of an addict today. 07:24 I think that is more of a thing, I saw Him give somebody 07:27 that was afraid their whole life the courage to walk 07:31 away from that fear. 07:32 To me I just want to kiss Him on the face when 07:35 I see that, because I want to say, God how do You 07:37 do that for this kid? 07:39 So how did He do that for you? 07:41 Yeah, actually things got a little worse before they 07:44 got better, as I got into my teenage years I had delayed 07:48 puberty and my voice didn't change. 07:50 I was always the youngest in my class as well so that deeply 07:55 affected my self-worth, issues so 07:58 I had I was really at the bottom of the social 08:00 totem pole so to speak. 08:02 - and being teased and all that stuff. 08:06 All that unkindness and all that which helped developed 08:10 in me a real sense for the oppressed, a real desire to 08:13 help the victim, a real desire to help people in trouble. 08:16 - to see them even. - yes, yes, yes. 08:20 What really helped me get out of that, and as you say 08:23 journey, but what started me on a journey was the birth 08:27 of my son, holding him in my arms. 08:30 The first time I held him, I instantly perceived that all 08:35 this stuff I had experienced from my father, all the stuff 08:40 I had been taught about God, was all a lie. 08:44 There was this whole set of emotions that I didn't even 08:49 know existed and they were all there just holding my son. 08:53 So it started there and then I started looking in the 08:57 Bible from a different way. 09:00 I would see things in the Psalms I never understood 09:02 before about God being a father. 09:05 This compassion for my son, and this compassion I now 09:13 knew that God had for me to feel special. 09:16 - you allowed that in for the first time, 09:19 because of your son it sounds like. 09:20 Uh-huh, uh-huh. - because there is that sense that 09:23 I could know that unless I allowed it in. 09:26 Unless I allow it to penetrate, is not going to change me. 09:29 But it sounds like you just said, okay, I surrender. 09:33 I did, I did and there are other stuff in terms of legalism 09:39 and stuff that I was coming out of with my wife. 09:41 Both of us were on this journey together. 09:43 That's where it started, and seeing all these Scriptures 09:47 that I had read before but overlooked. 09:50 I found them very healing to me. 09:52 - can you think of some of them? 09:55 Because you know God is our friend was one for me. 09:57 You know those are really powerful. 10:00 Psalms 73, where it says, "so foolish was I and ignorant, 10:04 "I was like a beast before you, nevertheless I am always 10:09 "with you, you hold me by my right hand, you guide me 10:14 "with your counsel and afterword you receive me into glory. " 10:18 A you know you could just see that Father image, 10:21 let Me just have your hand and let Me walk you. 10:24 I mean you could just see that whole father image. 10:26 When I saw something like that and I'm sure it's true for 10:30 a lot of people watching, when I saw stuff like that in 10:33 the Bible, I just wanted to weep, I thought I didn't know 10:37 that Your heart was so towards me. 10:40 That is huge, that's huge. 10:42 God healed me to the point where a friend of mine, 10:45 I was doing telecast scripts with him for the 10:48 It Is Written telecast, and he said you know, through 10:53 watching you raise your kids, our kids grew up together. 10:57 He said I understood about father love, God is my Father 11:01 in a way that I had never witnessed before. 11:04 I thought wow to come out of that into - healing be so 11:08 full circle that somebody is saying I want model myself 11:13 after how you love your son. 11:15 Yes, yes, yes! And he actually wrote a script about and 11:17 changed the name around, but I thought praise God. 11:23 How incredible, so as God healed you, you never lost 11:27 that sense of wanting to come in and step in for the 11:31 victim or the underdog, so did that lead 11:33 you into your vocation then? 11:35 It did, it did, I was a Pastor these years in Arizona. 11:40 - I could see you as a Pastor. 11:41 Well thank you, in other words I preach like... 11:45 - no you have such love your eyes. 11:48 I was a member of the ministerial Association and the 11:52 Baptist Pastor there who is the head of that said, 11:56 I really think that you could be a police chaplain. 11:59 We will train you, so I said good and he did. 12:03 So I found myself, all of a sudden, in all these 12:06 situations and there was a part of me that really loves 12:09 excitement, - you have some there! 12:13 Every time the siren goes off, something happens. 12:17 It is not only a physical emergency, but it is a profound 12:20 emotional and spiritual emergency as well. 12:23 - because people forget, sometimes when the chaplain 12:25 is called, or the police are called, you have an entire 12:28 community of families around whatever the event is. 12:31 You cannot just deal with an event without picking up 12:36 the collateral damage, and so I like the fact that you 12:41 said, there is more to it than just 12:42 responding to the call. 12:44 But I have to ask you one thing, because I came from that 12:48 darker side and I know that some of the stuff you see is 12:53 incredibly ugly, you know what I mean? 12:57 You see people that are able to step in and do some 13:01 horrendous acts of violence against someone else, 13:06 so how did you as a Pastor, how did you acclimate, 13:11 how did you get used to that? 13:12 There was one experience in particular when they had 13:18 just picked up a guy for first-degree murder, 13:20 they charged him with that. 13:22 Instead of wanting to see a lawyer, he wanted to see a 13:24 chaplain, this is a guy who just murdered a woman in 13:27 the act of committing rape and it was this aggravated 13:30 situation as had been an in the county for years. 13:34 So they called me in and they put me in the room. 13:37 Thank God there were bars between us. 13:40 They shut the door and the first thing he does is 13:44 confess first-degree murder. 13:46 - in that case most the time they want to tell you the all 13:50 the details. - yes. - because part of our illness is that. 13:54 He wanted some quick absolutions father I have sinned 13:57 like I was a priest or something. 14:00 I said you know I can talk to you about God and His 14:04 forgiveness, but I need you to know first of all that 14:08 I'm not going to get involved in the police aspect, 14:12 the law and defense, the legal defense of that. 14:14 We are just going to be talking about the spiritual 14:17 side of this and so I told him about Jesus. 14:23 I told them that, "he who covers his sins shall not 14:26 "prosper but whoever confesses and forsakes them shall 14:29 "have mercy. " And he accepted it right then and there. 14:33 We prayed together, but you know Cheri after 14:35 leaving him, I felt weird. 14:40 I felt weird because I thought I believe in grace, 14:44 but grace for this guy I could even see the blood on his 14:48 his cuticles from his victim, grace for this guy 14:50 was a little too radical, a little too quick, 14:52 too soon and I almost felt like I had done something 14:57 wrong in helping this guy feel forgiven. 15:01 - and find peace. - and find peace. 15:02 Because you can see it in his eyes, if he believed you 15:04 he had found peace, and maybe for the first time. 15:08 Yeah, I felt hey, then I got to remind myself, well, 15:14 aren't we all sinners? Don't we all exist by grace? 15:19 - you know even for some of the addicts watching and don't 15:22 understand the concept of sinners, I just want to say, 15:25 aren't we all twisted? 15:27 Don't we all have that stuff within us, that we struggle 15:30 with, some are definitely are tormented unto the point of 15:34 what you are talking about. 15:35 What you are saying is, isn't it incredible that there 15:39 is a God who says! - yes, yes! 15:42 So I had to deal with that, so I had to say you know I'm 15:46 saved by grace, by God's mercy, by God's kindness through 15:51 Jesus so I better embrace this grace. 15:55 He did and he decided to plead guilty and he went off 16:01 to the state penitentiary and was giving Bible studies. 16:07 So it really confronts the fact that when you see it to 16:11 that level it confronts the fact of how big is God's 16:16 forgiveness, how big is His love towards us. 16:18 Some of it in our own human sense makes no sense at all 16:23 because I want someone to pay. 16:26 When I first read the story about the demoniac, 16:28 I thought surely that guy is going to have to pay, 16:31 Christ walked up to Him, and not even smart enough not 16:34 to cuss Him out, first thing he does is cusses Him out. 16:37 God hears that small cry in his heart and pulls all the 16:41 demons out, literally brings his life around. 16:44 So you see that time and time again. 16:47 What did it do for your connection with God? 16:53 To see God's mercy to that level? 16:56 Sometimes we see His mercy just on simple things, 16:59 but that is so deep. 17:02 Sure, well there is a morbid illustration of that, 17:06 if I could share it? 17:08 The Bible says we are all dead in trespasses and sins, 17:11 in our own addictions what ever they may be. 17:14 If you could just picture a morgue, like I said this 17:18 is morbid, but it makes a good point I think. 17:21 Can you imagine one corpse, if corpses could talk, 17:24 arguing with another corpse saying I'm not as messed 17:27 up as you are. - how dead are you? - yeah, yeah, yeah. 17:30 I'm not as messed up as you are, you look like you were 17:33 hit by a train, but me my hair is not even messed up. 17:36 Just a little bullet hole and you might not even see it. 17:39 So I am not as bad off as you are. 17:41 Wow, they are all dead, they all have a tag on their toe. 17:45 Yes, yes, so for me to realize that hey, we are all in 17:50 that morgue until Jesus came along and rescued us. 17:54 I love that, because I love the fact that I don't have 17:58 to compare myself with you, my addictions with you, 18:02 my inability to live out loud and enjoy my life. 18:05 If I'm damaged, I'm damaged and I need to reach out 18:09 to who can fix that. 18:10 That is huge, that is a great illustration. 18:13 Tell us some of the stories you have been through. 18:17 Talk about them. - Sure, let's see. 18:21 There was a time when the beeper went off in the middle 18:24 of the night, and of course that is always trouble. 18:29 Usually a death notification, in this case particularly 18:33 it was a 15-year-old boy, who had just saw 18:37 his dad kill his mother. 18:38 Here they brought him into the station and 18:42 they called me in, they couldn't even interview him, 18:45 he was so traumatized. 18:47 The first thing they had me do was to tell him he 18:51 couldn't wash his hands, the blood of his mother and 18:54 brother, I should back up a bit. 18:57 His dad had been abusive, mother had to put him out. 19:02 She lived in the house with the two teenage boys and 19:07 then he started calling right about sundown. 19:11 He would say look out and see the sunset, isn't it 19:13 beautiful? Enjoy it because it is one of the last you will see 19:16 and he wasn't kidding. 19:18 He broke in about midnight and the boys woke up and heard 19:22 their mother screaming and their father shouting. 19:24 He had broken in so they ran downstairs and he grabbed 19:29 the phone and dialed 911 on the way. 19:31 He was a few steps behind his brother who got shot the 19:34 moment he entered the bedroom. 19:36 The father shot his mother and then shot himself. 19:39 So he comes in and there are three people, his three 19:43 dearest people in the world, dying right there. 19:46 He runs from one to the other, getting his hands all 19:48 bloody and the police come in. 19:51 And you have tell them he can't wash the evidence away. 19:54 Yeah, the gunshot residue and so to explain that to him. 19:59 Then just to calm him down so he could be interviewed. 20:03 That was his story that his father shot them, but they 20:07 have to make, sure of course, that he is. 20:12 But just to help that poor 15 year old guy through the 20:16 darkest night of his life, and then one day dawned and 20:21 the press is all outside wanting to talk to him. 20:24 The first day of the rest of his life, how to cope 20:27 with that, - how to stand back up. - yes! 20:29 In any sense how to breathe again. 20:31 I don't know if this question is appropriate, 20:38 I'm thinking in my mind, when I see addictions every day, 20:43 and I see the ugliness of that and molest, all this 20:46 tragedy that we go through in life, is how do you keep 20:50 your view of God clean? Do you know what I mean? 20:54 Because we want to somehow pile all the blame on God. 20:57 I know that God really would jump in front of everyone 21:00 of us to make better choices, every one of us to do the 21:03 right thing, He constantly tries to get people to make 21:07 the right choices in their life, and yet He gives us 21:10 that will, how do you allow God not to be so damaged? 21:14 To have blood on His own hands? 21:16 Sure, for me I think of a little parable Jesus told 21:21 about the tares, an enemy has done this. 21:24 Wonderful world you can see in nature, 21:27 where did this evil come from? 21:30 Then the great controversy between good and evil, 21:34 the narrative of how God created the perfect universe. 21:39 How Lucifer became proud and power-hungry and such. 21:44 It gives us a narrative that helps me understand that there 21:48 is a loving God, and there was none of this stuff 21:51 going on when He had His way and there will be closure, 21:55 there will be none of this stuff going on after 21:57 He wraps things up. 22:00 The only reason He allows things to keep going right now 22:03 is because He is so merciful, He wants all the Cheri's 22:08 and Martin's to understand the difference between light 22:13 and darkness, healing and addiction, health and disease. 22:18 So when this good news is received, then God is going to 22:22 put an end to all that and there will be once again, 22:27 this beautiful Eden. 22:29 So you keep the larger picture in mind. - sure! 22:33 When someone told me one time, that I was molested since 22:37 I was three months old by my father who died in a crack 22:41 house strung out, and when someone said Cheri you know 22:46 God allowed this, I just had to take that to prayer. 22:50 I remember almost be an angry, what do you mean? 22:54 God that can't be true, and all of a sudden I got this clear 22:57 picture in our own addictions is that if He could stop 23:01 everybody from acting out, from being insecure, 23:03 from being afraid, from be an angry, and choosing to do 23:06 meth, and all that stuff. 23:08 If I could stop all that, I would come but you have the 23:11 freedom of your own choice. 23:13 Of your own will, and it is so important for God to give 23:17 us that ability to be fully human that He said, I am not 23:20 going to override your choice, but I wish I could 23:23 sometimes, because you are hurtful to each other. 23:26 I learned a long time ago that God would have done 23:29 anything to get my father to be a father. 23:31 He did, He approached him in many different ways. 23:34 My family from not using drugs were approached in many 23:37 different ways, and I think every single person that you 23:40 worked with during those incredibly horrendous crimes, 23:43 is I see all of heaven approaching them in so many 23:46 different ways saying, please choose life. 23:49 There is a place the Bible where it says I laid before 23:52 you life or death, choose life. 23:54 I think I have to really look at God as weeping with us 23:58 at these horrendous crimes, it was never His intention 24:02 that we would be this malicious to each other. 24:06 Right, I'm so thankful that God can and does work 24:09 all things for good. 24:10 I mean here you are a host of this television program 24:14 reaching people all over. 24:15 I think the devil is very sorry he messed with your life. 24:18 I never heard that, that is too fun. 24:21 Like I should have just let her alone. 24:23 Not only do you have healing for yourself, but you are 24:27 sharing this comfort and to have a purpose in pain. 24:31 I want to kiss you on the face for that, 24:33 what a nice thing, even the imagery is cool, is that, 24:37 that it is really cool. 24:39 2 Corinthians were it talks about what we suffer, what we 24:44 suffer, that comfort abounds so that whatever suffering 24:48 we are going through, the comfort even more abounds. 24:51 I believe that sometimes, you know we are called priests. 24:54 We are the priest of believers, and priests suffer. 25:00 They deal with stuff that they didn't do, other people's 25:04 messes they help them with. 25:07 Of course everybody has to on their own mess, 25:09 but we are not Messiah's, but we are as priests. 25:12 We are connectors, God has been merciful to me. 25:16 He has brought healing in my life and He could do 25:19 this for you too. 25:21 So that God can work all this pain for good. 25:25 Amen, and then use it. 25:28 I remember the first time I was thinking I'm not going 25:32 to make it, I'm not going to get through this. 25:33 God told me a joke and I thought, 25:36 did You just tell me a joke? 25:38 Because I wanted to say, I just didn't have that picture 25:42 of God that He would say something to make you laugh 25:45 when you are going through some hard times. 25:47 Just been able to get to the point of fully trusting Him. 25:50 So as He is leading you, go back to your vocation, as He 25:54 is leading you into this type of work, as you are 25:59 learning it is amazing to me that you are learning not to 26:03 be afraid, you are confronted with fearful situations all 26:07 the time, and yet God is developing this sense of 26:09 courage in you because of who He is in your walk. 26:13 That just cracks me up, that He hit every point that 26:16 you had as a child. 26:17 Let me talk about that for a second. 26:19 So here I am, my predominant default reaction to life is 26:24 fear, so here I am the buzzard venturing forth into 26:28 these death situations, and I didn't go timidly. 26:32 I went boldly, it just, the Spirit of God came upon me 26:37 and I realized that Christ has conquered death. 26:40 It's a terrible thing, it is an enemy, but it is a 26:43 conquered enemy so we can storm the gates of hell. 26:47 We can go into these situations where people are suffering 26:52 the loss of their loved ones and we can bring 26:53 hope, even though they are in the middle of shock. 26:58 This is the worst night of their life and I'm going to be 27:01 there for them, and I'm going to represent God to them. 27:03 I'm going to help them through that night so that when 27:07 day dawns and their friends wake up, their Pastor or 27:11 priest wakes up and their counselors wake up, 27:14 they are going to be ready to connect with them. 27:16 But tonight I am here for them and it is because 27:19 Jesus conquered death. 27:21 - through the Holy Spirit and through what 27:22 He gives you to say to them. Wow! 27:25 I want you to know that before I went out that door, 27:29 I had my face and the rug for a few seconds before I put 27:32 on my uniform, dear God You have helped me before, 27:36 but tonight I am not going to leave this house to go down 27:41 to the station unless You are with me. 27:44 Of course He always is. 27:45 So the thing about calling you buzzard, if you are around 27:51 or someone died, something dead around that it really was 27:55 that people respected the fact that you could come in and 27:59 bring at least the ability for them to survive the night. 28:04 So to me it makes a lot of sense now they would want you 28:09 there, if I'm a police officer and I know that I'm dealing 28:12 with this tragic thing and have to process all the paperwork, 28:15 I would want somebody that I could turn the family, 28:18 or victims over to and that they will be in the arms 28:22 of a loving individual and therefore a loving God. 28:26 Another thing that helped me is to clearly understand 28:29 what the Bible teaches about death, nobody is in hell 28:33 right now, and no one is floating off by themselves into 28:37 some spirit realm, but death is a sleep. 28:41 Just understanding that I don't have to worry about the 28:48 departed and what's happening with them right now. 28:50 We can deal with this situation and help you get through, 28:54 and respect, and now you may be an agnostic or an 28:58 atheist but I am coming into your home and I'm going to 29:01 look around for artifacts. 29:03 If I do not see any Bibles or religious artifacts I'm not 29:06 going to push God on you. - speak it a different way. 29:11 But still speak it, and for a lot of us we don't assess 29:16 enough, you can walk in and really look around and know 29:19 who you are talking to, and I'm glad somebody did that 29:23 for me when I was a heroine addict in recovery. 29:26 I was a literate and all that stuff and they didn't just 29:29 come in and say do you know what it says in Genesis? 29:32 They really spoke to me in love and helped me stand, 29:35 so been able to do that. 29:37 So we are going to break for a commercial pretty soon, 29:42 but I want to ask you, so your journey with God as you 29:47 come out to of that whole childhood and He is showing 29:51 you to be less afraid, and as you are giving that to 29:55 people in horrendous situations, what is it like for 29:59 you and God right now? Where are you at? 30:01 Well I find every day I need to get up and just 30:06 rediscover for today who I am to God. 30:10 So your maintenance, we're talking about maintenance 30:12 and your maintenance to hook in everyday. 30:15 Who am I, who are you. - I'm not some barnyard chicken 30:19 pecking around there, He made me an eagle in Jesus Christ 30:23 so I soar in the Spirit, to peck around at the barnyard 30:28 looking for a pat on the head at the age of 58, I can soar. 30:33 That is a real good imagery because you are saying that 30:36 if you find your self pecking and looking for the smaller 30:40 things is you have to remind yourself that you are an 30:43 eagle, you are an incredible man of God and fears not 30:47 something that controls your life anymore. 30:48 We are going to go on a break and come back and open 30:51 for questions because I know there are questions. 30:55 I just have to say that I really enjoyed the fact, 30:59 I laughed at the buzzard thing, that people called you 31:02 the buzzard, I laughed I was overwhelmed by what you do 31:05 for a living, because I read your book, 'God Was There' 31:08 and so even in that I looked at some of the stuff you did 31:13 but had no idea really the extent of fear you walk through 31:17 life with and that God Himself is saying that is your 31:20 recovery is to deal with this fear. 31:22 I'm proud of how He is doing it with you. 31:24 We are to go ahead and take a break and come back and 31:26 ask the people at the café if they have any questions and 31:29 I think you are really going to enjoy this next part as 31:32 much as the testimony. 31:34 So stay with us, we will be right back! |
Revised 2014-12-17