Participants:
Series Code: IIWC
Program Code: IIWC202429S
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00:07 ♪♪ 00:39 [calm music] 00:43 ♪♪ 00:45 >> Welcome to 00:46 It Is Written Canada. 00:47 Thank you for joining us. 00:48 Perhaps you voice the complaint, 00:50 I just don't feel heard. 00:53 We all crave the connection 00:55 that comes from at least 00:56 one person giving us 00:58 a listening ear. 01:00 This kind of deep listening, 01:02 healthy listening, is a skill. 01:06 >> How do we listen in a way 01:07 that enhances connection 01:09 with the people we love? 01:11 What listening habits 01:13 have we fallen into that are 01:14 destroying that connection? 01:17 The way we listen to those 01:19 we love can profoundly determine 01:22 the level of connection 01:23 we enjoy with them. 01:25 >> Today on 01:26 It Is Written Canada, 01:27 our special guest is 01:28 Pastor Bill Spangler, 01:30 who has led churches in 01:32 the maritime Provinces, 01:33 British Columbia and Alberta, 01:36 retiring from ministry 01:37 in 2020. 01:40 He has a Bachelor's of Theology, 01:43 a masters of Divinity degree, 01:45 and has trained and is certified 01:48 as a family mediator 01:50 and life coach. 01:53 >> Bill is married to 01:54 Gwen Yosako, and they are 01:56 parents to two daughters 01:57 and enjoy two grandchildren. 02:01 Bill is the author of the book, 02:02 Lessons From the Wilderness, 02:05 a catalog of life lessons 02:07 that are useful to anyone 02:09 seeking personal growth 02:11 and skills for 02:12 making relationships work. 02:16 >> Pastor Bill Spangler, 02:17 thank you for joining us again 02:18 on It Is Written Canada. 02:20 >> It's my privilege to be here 02:22 again one more time. 02:24 >> Pastor Bill, in the book 02:26 that you wrote, 02:27 Lessons From the Wilderness, 02:28 there's a whole chapter about 02:31 listening. 02:32 Why is listening so important? 02:34 Aren't we all good listeners? 02:37 >> Interesting question, René, 02:39 and I called that chapter, 02:41 "Ears Are For More Than 02:42 Holding Up Our Glasses." 02:43 Listening is very crucial 02:46 to good relationships. 02:48 So we do learn life lessons 02:50 as we go, life skills as we go. 02:53 We grow up. 02:54 We learn by the knocks of life 02:56 and by interacting with kids 02:57 in school and with 02:59 our teenage peers and our 03:01 parents and our siblings. 03:02 We learn all kinds of things. 03:04 And there is no place to go 03:07 that I'm aware of 03:09 where we get a degree in 03:11 life skills. 03:12 We can get a degree in 03:13 all manner of careers and... 03:18 ...things to do. 03:20 But I don't know where to get 03:21 a certificate on life skills. 03:23 And listening is probably one of 03:25 the most crucial life skills 03:27 that there is. 03:29 I think that listening 03:32 will determine whether we are 03:33 really connected with the people 03:35 that matter to us, or whether 03:37 we're living in a relationship 03:39 that is just kind of surface. 03:42 It all depends on how safe 03:44 we make it for others 03:45 or how safe they make it for us. 03:49 Some people we like to talk to 03:50 and can talk to easily, 03:53 and some people we would 03:55 never share our hearts with. 03:58 I have friends that no matter 03:59 how many months it is between 04:01 seeing them, we can just sort of 04:04 pick up right where we were 04:05 because we know that 04:06 relationship is safe and 04:09 strong and solid 04:10 and other relationships, 04:12 "How's the weather?" and, 04:14 you know, and that kind of 04:15 thing and we leave it at that 04:16 because there is no depth there 04:19 by choice or whatever reason. 04:21 So our safety level 04:23 is often dependent upon 04:26 how we listen. 04:28 So I learned these lessons 04:29 when I was studying to be 04:30 a life coach and it was 04:33 new to me. 04:34 And I was an adult and thinking 04:36 that I knew how to listen. 04:38 Boy, did I have lots to learn. 04:40 So here's what I learned. 04:42 There's a level one listening. 04:44 So level one listening is 04:47 not bad, it just doesn't 04:49 offer depth 04:52 in connection. 04:54 It's the kind of listening 04:56 that we do when we need details. 04:59 So we need to know... 05:02 ...can you take the children 05:04 to school on Thursday? 05:06 Can you pick them up 05:07 after school early on Thursday? 05:09 Oh, okay. 05:09 What time do I need to do? 05:10 What time is the 05:12 dental appointment? 05:13 What do I need to pick up 05:14 at the store? 05:16 It's just the details 05:18 that I need to know because 05:19 I'm going to be responsible to 05:21 follow through on those things. 05:23 But often what happens, 05:25 we get talking to somebody and 05:27 we listen to them 05:28 at level one. 05:31 And so they will say something 05:33 to us, and 05:35 a level one responds 05:37 in a way that is 05:39 all about me. 05:41 So Mike says something to me 05:43 and my response is he's maybe 05:45 starting to tell me a story. 05:47 Maybe he's telling me a story 05:49 about something that 05:50 he's going through, or something 05:53 that one of his family members 05:54 are going through 05:55 or there's something hard 05:56 and I'll quickly deflect it, 05:59 you know, or I'll have another, 06:01 I'll have a response that 06:03 I have a better story than that, 06:05 you know. 06:06 I just found out that my─ 06:08 he might say, "I've just 06:09 found out that my mother 06:12 was diagnosed with cancer." 06:14 "Oh, well, what kind of 06:15 cancer was it?" 06:16 "Well, it's this kind of─" 06:17 "Oh, it's okay. 06:18 It'll be fine, because 06:19 my uncle had that and 06:20 he's fine today, 06:22 so don't worry about it. 06:23 It's fine." 06:24 That's level one. 06:25 I'm telling 06:26 my perspective 06:28 I'm making about me 06:29 and my story, and it minimizes 06:32 his story. 06:33 Level one listening judges. 06:36 You know, somebody 06:37 makes a statement and says 06:40 whatever, and I respond 06:42 by saying, "Well, I don't think 06:43 that's a good idea. 06:44 I think that's crazy. 06:46 I don't know why you would 06:47 think that. 06:48 How did you ever come up with 06:49 an idea like that?" 06:51 Well, it backs them up then 06:53 and they don't want to 06:54 say anymore because 06:56 they share their ideas and 06:59 dreams to be responded to, 07:02 not to be shut down. 07:04 So when we get to know people 07:05 early in a relationship, 07:07 like I got to know my wife 07:10 skating around a skating rink. 07:12 We skated for a long time 07:13 that night, just chatting and 07:15 getting to know each other and 07:17 finding out about her siblings 07:19 and my siblings and my parents 07:20 and her parents and 07:22 that kind of thing. 07:24 There was nothing in-depth 07:25 in that conversation. 07:26 It was all level one, because 07:28 that's how relationships start. 07:30 But then if we want more, 07:32 we have to do 07:34 something different. 07:36 Level one 07:38 is really a kind of a 07:39 selfish way to listen. 07:41 I need the details. 07:43 I need the story. 07:44 I need to have you know 07:46 where I'm at. 07:47 And sometimes, like I said, 07:50 it's necessary, but often 07:52 it's very destructive to 07:55 going to any depth in 07:57 the relationship that 07:58 we might want. 07:59 >> So because I'm so intuitive, 08:01 I'm guessing that because 08:02 there's a level one, 08:04 there's a level two. 08:05 >> There is a level two, Mike. 08:06 >> So what does level two 08:08 look like, Bill? 08:09 >> So level two listening 08:10 goes to a different place. 08:12 Level one you start talking 08:14 and I make the conversation 08:16 all about me. 08:17 Level two, you start talking 08:20 and I click in and I make the 08:21 conversation all about you. 08:24 What it is you're 08:25 talking to me about. 08:27 So I picture it this way. 08:29 If I want to do good 08:30 level two listening, 08:31 when somebody starts to speak, 08:33 I picture them as picking up 08:35 the microphone 08:36 and I let them talk as long as 08:38 they have the microphone. 08:40 The only thing I will ask 08:42 or interject is 08:44 just something for clarity 08:46 to know more about what it is 08:47 that you're talking about, 08:49 what it is that you're 08:50 experiencing. 08:51 I make the 08:52 level one conversation 08:54 all about me, 08:56 but at level two, 08:57 I make it all about you 08:59 and what's happening to you. 09:01 So let's go back to this story. 09:02 "My mother just got diagnosed 09:04 and it doesn't look good." 09:07 "Oh, man... 09:08 ...that must be tough. 09:10 What's that like for you? 09:12 What's happening with you? 09:15 How is she doing? 09:19 What are you learning 09:20 through all of this?" 09:22 Those kinds of questions that 09:24 go to your heart and go to 09:26 your experience and it has 09:27 nothing to do with me 09:30 or what I want to know. 09:32 Even my curiosity. 09:34 Level one listening would be 09:35 the question that says, 09:36 "Oh, what kind of cancer 09:37 does she have?" 09:38 That's not necessary 09:39 for me to know. 09:40 You told me that she's 09:41 diagnosed, that's your story. 09:44 If you want to tell me 09:45 what it is, 09:46 that's also your story. 09:47 I don't get to ask the details 09:50 in level two listening, 09:51 I wanna ask about 09:53 your experience. 09:54 I wanna ask about your heart. 09:56 I wanna ask about your emotions. 09:58 I wanna ask about your struggle. 10:00 I wanna ask about your learning 10:02 and how this is impacting you. 10:06 So if I go back to the story of 10:09 me skating all evening 10:10 with my wife... 10:13 ...I want that relationship 10:15 to go deeper. 10:16 So then at some point 10:18 in some level, 10:19 we started to talk about things 10:20 that were involving our dreams 10:23 or our goals or the things 10:25 that matter to us, 10:27 the things that are 10:28 important to us, 10:29 the things that make us happy. 10:30 The─ our walk with God. 10:33 Things that are deeper than 10:35 just the surface stuff. 10:37 And here's what makes 10:39 conversations really work. 10:41 If you start opening up to me 10:44 about something going on in your 10:46 experience, if I... 10:50 ...push back on that right away, 10:52 the conversation will shut down 10:53 and you'll say, 10:55 "Well, I'm not doing that again. 10:56 I'm just gonna go to level one. 10:57 I'll stay at level one. 10:58 It's safe down there. 10:59 We can talk about 11:00 the weather there. 11:01 We can talk about 11:03 the news there. 11:04 We can talk about 11:05 the simple things there." 11:07 But if I wanna get into 11:08 a relationship, 11:11 there is a time that I have to 11:12 test the dreams, passions, 11:14 goals, vision. 11:16 And this is where we make it 11:18 safe for the people that 11:20 matter to us. 11:22 If we help them 11:23 explore that goal 11:24 and explore that vision, 11:26 explore that dream, 11:28 make it safe for them, 11:30 even if we don't agree... 11:34 ...it can make 11:35 all the difference 11:36 in the world and how that 11:37 relationship builds. 11:39 When we feel heard... 11:42 ...when we start to talk. 11:44 When we feel like it's safe, 11:47 we open up our hearts. 11:49 So... 11:51 ...parents to children. 11:53 Children can say things that 11:55 in our experience, 11:57 we have already learned 11:58 that's not gonna to work. 12:00 We've already learned 12:01 that's not safe. 12:03 We've already learned 12:04 there's danger here. 12:06 But if we respond 12:07 to our children that way, 12:09 they may back away and never... 12:13 ...trust us again with 12:14 some of their deeper stuff 12:16 or their questions. 12:18 Children can come to parents 12:20 and start saying, You know what? 12:22 I'm having questions about... 12:24 ...this. 12:25 I'm having questions about God. 12:27 I'm having questions about 12:28 church or something where the 12:30 values that have been built into 12:32 that family have been strong. 12:33 But now all of a sudden, 12:34 a child comes and, "I'm having 12:36 questions about this." 12:38 Level one listening 12:39 will immediately shut that down. 12:42 "Well come on. 12:43 You know what we believe. 12:44 You know what's right. 12:45 You know what the Bible says. 12:46 You know..." 12:47 That's all level one. 12:49 Level two says, "Wow. 12:52 So let's talk. 12:54 Let's hear this." 12:55 And even if when the child 12:58 expresses their heart 12:59 and lets their heart bleed... 13:04 ...even then, 13:05 when we don't agree, 13:06 how we manage it from there 13:08 is very, very important. 13:11 I think of an illustration 13:13 of a little child 13:14 coming home from school, 13:16 throwing his books down and 13:17 throwing his backpack down. 13:19 "I'm never going back to school 13:20 again!" 13:22 And if a parent is at level one, 13:24 they'll say something like, 13:26 "Well, of course you are. 13:27 We paid good money for you 13:28 to go to this school and 13:29 you're gonna to keep going. 13:30 So just go to your room and 13:32 have a glass of orange juice and 13:34 and I'll bring it to you 13:35 and a cookie, and you'll 13:36 feel better in a little while. 13:37 When you change your attitude, 13:39 and, you know, you can 13:40 come back out." 13:42 That's level one. 13:44 Level two would say, 13:46 "Wow, sounds like somebody 13:47 had a bad day. 13:50 Why don't you go put your books 13:52 away and all them get a cookie 13:54 and some juice, and we'll talk." 13:56 And the child comes back. 13:58 "Well, what was so hard 13:59 about today?" 14:00 "Well, you know, this happened," 14:01 and let the parent explore 14:04 what's going on with the child. 14:07 That's the difference 14:08 in relationships 14:10 that will happen based on 14:12 how well we listened to them. 14:15 >> So, Pastor Bill, 14:16 it sounds like really 14:18 when we're using level two 14:20 listening, it's really 14:22 all about the talker, 14:24 the one that's 14:25 doing the talking. 14:26 It's all about them. 14:28 And all about 14:29 really reaching their heart. 14:31 Like you said, there's that 14:32 emotional connection 14:34 that we are fulfilling or 14:37 forming once we 14:40 are practicing listening 14:42 on a level two, because it's 14:44 not about me, it's about 14:46 the talker. 14:47 >> That's exactly what 14:48 level two is. 14:50 It's letting the conversation 14:51 unfold. 14:52 It has nothing to do with 14:54 whether I agree. 14:55 I can listen to somebody at 14:57 level two and not agree with 14:59 anything they're telling me. 15:01 But if I'm a good listener, 15:03 I can stay focused on them. 15:06 I can check in with them 15:07 in my own head and say, "Okay, 15:09 go to level two here 15:10 and pay attention." 15:12 And it can happen easily, 15:15 even if everything they're 15:16 saying, I have a 15:17 whole different worldview 15:19 or a whole different perspective 15:20 on the very same topic. 15:22 That happened to me 15:23 just recently. 15:24 I guess maybe that's why 15:25 I'm saying it. 15:26 It just, within the last week, 15:27 a lady began to share with me 15:29 some of her philosophical views 15:31 on God and 15:33 the spiritual nature 15:34 of the world. 15:35 And, I have a biblical 15:37 worldview, and some of the 15:38 things she was saying 15:40 would not be backed up 15:41 by the Scripture. 15:42 But I just thought, in my head 15:44 I said, "Stay at level two," 15:46 and I and I connected in 15:47 and let her talk. 15:48 And in the end, I said to her, 15:51 "What I really appreciate 15:52 about you and me is that 15:54 we can agree to disagree. 15:55 And I would disagree for these 15:57 reasons, but we can still 15:58 be friends." 16:00 That's what level two is 16:01 all about, and that's where 16:02 connections really happen. 16:04 >> So someone may be listening 16:06 to this and thinking, "Okay, 16:08 I'm a level two listener. 16:10 Do I ever have anything to say?" 16:14 >> Yes, the level two listener 16:16 does get a chance 16:17 to say something. [laughs] 16:19 So level two listening, 16:21 if you're talking to me 16:23 about something that's going on 16:24 in your life, in your 16:25 experience, with your children, 16:27 with your relationship, 16:28 with whatever, I can ask 16:30 lots of questions along the way, 16:32 but the questions will all be 16:34 about, "Tell me more. 16:36 Could you say that 16:37 in different words? 16:38 Help me understand 16:39 what you meant when you said..." 16:41 All my talking, all my questions 16:43 will be about exploring 16:46 that person's thoughts. 16:48 Then when the 16:50 story is out 16:51 and when the, 16:54 maybe the energy 16:55 around the topic is beginning to 16:56 wane a little bit, 16:58 then it would be very possible 17:00 for you to become 17:02 the talker, 17:03 take the mic and say things 17:06 like, "I really appreciate 17:08 what you said. 17:09 I want to share 17:10 some of my thoughts 17:11 on that topic. 17:13 This is what I have learned." 17:15 If I take the mic and say, 17:18 "Well, I've listened to what 17:19 you said and I don't agree with 17:20 any of it," now I've gone 17:22 right back to level one again. 17:24 But it's very reasonable 17:26 and right that I should be 17:28 able to share my perspective 17:29 on something. 17:31 However, 17:32 if my goal in 17:34 beginning to talk now 17:36 is about proving to you that 17:38 you're wrong and that I'm right, 17:40 I'm going to wash out 17:41 the whole conversation. 17:44 I think that we would 17:47 do very well if we would 17:48 just remember, I acknowledge 17:50 your position. 17:51 This is my position. 17:54 If I acknowledge your position, 17:55 but this is my position, 17:58 now I've washed it out. 17:59 If I acknowledge your position, 18:01 period. 18:03 This is my position. 18:04 Now I'm allowing your position 18:06 to stand, I'm allowing your 18:07 perspective to be real, 18:09 can be on the table, 18:10 and I'm going to add mine. 18:12 So they're both equivalent, 18:14 they're both valid, 18:16 but I haven't... 18:19 ...washed it out by 18:21 pushing it away. 18:24 >> Pastor Bill, this reminds me 18:25 of a book that Mike and I read, 18:27 and the book was entitled 18:29 “Doing Life with Your 18:30 Adult Children” 18:32 by Jim Byrnes. 18:33 And he mentioned something 18:35 over there, and it says, 18:37 he says that when we give 18:40 our adult children, 18:41 this with our adult children, 18:43 when we give them 18:45 unsolicited advice, 18:47 they see it as criticism 18:50 and they're gonna shut down. 18:52 And so this reminds me when 18:54 we're giving unsolicited advice, 18:57 we are speaking more, 18:59 maybe because of our experience 19:01 and we don't want them to 19:02 make the same mistakes 19:03 as what we did. 19:04 So when we're giving 19:06 unsolicited advice, 19:07 we are actually being 19:08 a level one listener. 19:09 >> Absolutely at level one. 19:11 >> Yeah, and so they're 19:12 feeling like, "Wow. 19:14 We're feeling criticized. 19:15 We're feeling condemn. 19:17 We're feeling judged." 19:18 And so... 19:19 ...they just shut down, right? 19:20 >> So the level of connection 19:22 grows higher and higher 19:24 and higher. 19:25 We think about a deep connection 19:26 and higher is deep 19:27 in this illustration, 19:29 we go higher and higher and 19:30 higher towards what I would call 19:32 in-to-me-see, or "intimacy" 19:34 spelled differently. 19:36 We all want to be seen into. 19:38 We all want to be known 19:39 in our hearts. 19:41 and that happens when we listen 19:43 or when we are listened to. 19:46 So if two people have learned to 19:47 listen deeply to each other, 19:49 the depth of in-to-me-see 19:51 can grow to a place that is 19:53 unbelievably rewarding. 19:56 >> That's very important 19:57 understanding that in-to-me-see, 19:59 but who allows you to see 20:00 into me is me. 20:02 And if you shut down 20:03 the conversation by the way 20:05 you're listening, then I'm 20:06 gonna quit... 20:07 >> Exactly. 20:08 >> ...showing you into me, yep. 20:09 >> Exactly. 20:10 If I don't make it safe 20:11 for you to talk, 20:12 you're never going to share 20:13 your heart with me. 20:15 >> Right. 20:15 >> And so people have 20:18 phoned me after reading the book 20:20 and saying, "Pastor Bill, 20:22 you nailed me. 20:24 I'm a level one listener. 20:25 I didn't realize 20:26 what a poor listener that I am." 20:30 And I'm glad that people 20:32 come to that awareness 20:33 and realize that there is 20:35 a different way to do this. 20:37 >> So, Pastor Bill, 20:38 what practical steps can we take 20:41 or can we do 20:42 to really become 20:44 a level two listener? 20:46 >> It's about reminding 20:47 ourselves as we're 20:48 talking to people, 20:50 go to level two. 20:51 Stay in level two. 20:53 Think in level two. 20:55 Give them the honour. 20:57 Give them the mic. 20:59 Recognize that they're 21:01 telling a story that they 21:02 need to be able to express. 21:06 There's an acronym that says, 21:08 “Wait,” W-A-I-T: 21:10 Why Am I Talking? 21:14 If we could use that discipline, 21:16 we could be good 21:17 level two listeners. 21:18 Well, why am I talking? 21:20 Why do I need to say 21:21 what I'm about to say? 21:23 Is it going to enhance 21:24 the conversation 21:26 with Mike or with René or with 21:28 whoever I'm talking to? 21:29 Is it gonna help them develop 21:31 their story and their thoughts? 21:33 If it's for any other reason... 21:36 ...I just wanna insert a joke 21:38 because I'm a funny guy, 21:39 or I just want to deflect 21:41 what you just said or whatever. 21:43 If I'm taking away from 21:44 your story, then it's gone to 21:46 level one. 21:48 So it's a discipline. 21:49 It's learning, but it's not 21:50 hard, it's just the discipline 21:52 of paying attention. 21:54 This person has the mic. 21:56 Let them talk. 21:58 Help me develop their story. 22:01 >> Okay, and... 22:03 ...what about level three 22:05 of listening? 22:06 Because it's a level three, 22:07 right? 22:08 >> There is a level three. 22:09 We stop at level three, 22:10 but there is a three. 22:11 Level three pays attention to 22:14 the body language, 22:16 the unspoken words 22:18 in the conversation, 22:20 the things that are happening. 22:21 It could be the look 22:23 on a person's face. 22:25 It could be if they 22:26 roll their eyes at us. 22:27 It could be if we see 22:28 a tear develop, 22:29 it could be if they're smiling 22:31 or if they've lost their smile. 22:33 We're paying attention 22:35 to the atmosphere 22:37 within the conversation. 22:39 So let me give an illustration. 22:41 I came home, Gwen, my wife, 22:43 was, there was tears 22:45 and she was home alone 22:46 and there's tears 22:47 and her face is red and 22:50 I said, "Oh... 22:52 ...what's happening? 22:53 What's going on?" 22:55 And she said, "Oh, it's 22:57 that time of year 22:59 when Kristen died and 23:02 I've just been thinking 23:03 a lot about her 23:04 and remembering 23:07 those last few days." 23:09 And so level one listening 23:11 would say, "Yeah, well, that's 23:13 three years ago. 23:14 We gotta move on." 23:16 But I went into level two 23:18 and I said, "Yeah, it's 23:20 that time of year, let's talk." 23:22 So we sat down and we began to 23:24 talk, reminisce about 23:26 our memories of that week and... 23:29 But then we began to remember 23:31 other things and what a joy 23:33 she was to us 23:34 and the fun things. 23:37 And pretty soon we're laughing. 23:39 And because I just let her heart 23:41 be real 23:43 in that moment. 23:44 And that's what 23:45 level two listening does, 23:47 it pays attention to the 23:49 level three that's going on 23:51 and then slips into level two. 23:53 What's going on for you? 23:55 Now, if I said to you, 23:56 "I see the tear. 23:58 You always put tears in─ 23:59 you always start crying 24:01 when you wanna manipulate 24:02 the conversation and 24:04 you're just trying to get 24:05 your own way again." 24:06 Okay, that's level one. 24:08 Level two just says, 24:10 "I see your tears. 24:11 What are the tears about?" 24:14 I think of a couple of stories 24:16 very briefly in the Bible. 24:18 The angel came to Zechariah and 24:20 said, "You're gonna have a son." 24:23 And he said, "Yeah, well, 24:24 how can this be? 24:25 I'm an old man and 24:26 my wife is an old woman." 24:29 And the angel said, 24:30 "You're gonna have a son 24:31 and you're not gonna talk 24:32 until that day." 24:35 An angel came to Mary and said, 24:36 "You're gonna have a son." 24:39 "Well, how can this be? 24:40 I'm a virgin. 24:41 I'm not married." 24:43 And, "Well, it's gonna be 24:45 like this." 24:46 And she said, 24:47 "May it be as you have said." 24:50 She was level two 24:53 thinking about, "Okay, 24:54 I don't understand, 24:55 but I hear you." 24:57 Whereas his question, 24:58 almost the very same question, 25:00 was almost defiant. 25:02 "This is crazy. 25:03 I don't know what you're saying. 25:04 I can't have a child." 25:06 And so we can even do 25:08 level two listening with God. 25:10 When we have to go through 25:11 hard times, "God, what do You 25:13 want to teach me here? 25:14 What's this about?" 25:15 Rather than, "God, why are You 25:17 asking me to go through this? 25:18 Why are You putting this on me?" 25:20 That's level one. 25:21 Level two listening with God 25:23 will take us into a place of 25:24 intimacy with Him as well. 25:26 Listening is such a 25:28 wonderful tool and life skill. 25:31 >> So, Bill, we've come to 25:32 the end of our time together, 25:33 I wonder if you can pray 25:34 for our viewers. 25:35 Maybe someone is just listening 25:36 to this kind of a conversation 25:39 for the first time and says, 25:40 "Whoa, this is something 25:41 I wasn't aware of. 25:43 Help me to be 25:44 a better listener." 25:45 And maybe there's someone 25:46 who's actually wanting 25:48 others to listen to them 25:50 and for them to have someone 25:53 who's a real good listening ear. 25:56 >> Glad to. 25:57 Dear Father in Heaven, 25:58 thank You so much for 26:00 calling us to a place of 26:02 intimacy with You. 26:04 But may we turn that around 26:06 and give that gift to others, 26:07 the ones that we love. 26:09 Maybe there's people 26:10 listening today who have 26:11 struggled with a depth 26:13 of relationship. 26:14 I pray that You will 26:16 speak to them in a way that 26:17 they will listen deeper. 26:19 They will learn to relate 26:20 in a way that will build 26:22 confidence, build safety 26:24 so that the connection will be 26:26 deeper and stronger 26:27 in every way. 26:29 Most of all, may we be 26:30 good listeners of You. 26:32 Thank You for all You do for us. 26:33 In Jesus name, amen. 26:36 >> Amen. 26:37 Bill, thank you for 26:39 sharing with us 26:40 another one of the life lessons 26:42 that you learned through your 26:43 wilderness experience. 26:45 It's been such a pleasure 26:46 having you here today. 26:48 >> It's been my pleasure 26:49 to be here and I love 26:50 talking about these things. 26:52 [inspirational music] 26:55 ♪♪ 27:05 >> Friends, whenever life 27:07 doesn't make sense 27:08 or you are feeling down 27:10 and discouraged, misunderstood, 27:12 like no one is listening. 27:14 We recommend you pick up 27:16 this little book, 27:17 Help In Daily Living. 27:21 >> We would like to send 27:22 this book to you 27:23 free of charge if you're 27:25 feeling like the wheels are 27:27 falling off or your life is 27:29 becoming unglued, or if the 27:31 wheels are simply spinning 27:33 and you're not getting anywhere. 27:34 You will find solutions 27:36 in this little book, 27:37 our free offer, 27:39 Help In Daily Living. 27:41 >> Before you go, we would 27:43 like to thank all of you 27:44 who have supported the ministry 27:46 of It Is Written Canada 27:48 with your prayers 27:49 and financial contributions. 27:52 Without your support, 27:54 this television ministry 27:56 could not have reached 27:58 so many people 27:59 for so many decades. 28:01 >> Yes, thank you. 28:03 And we would like to invite you 28:05 to follow us on Instagram and 28:06 Facebook and subscribe to our 28:09 YouTube channel, and also 28:10 listen to our podcasts. 28:13 >> Friends, if you want to 28:14 develop the kind of 28:16 listening skills Jesus 28:17 demonstrated in His life, 28:20 we recommend you open the Bible 28:23 where it is recorded that 28:25 our Saviour found His assurance 28:27 to defeat the devil 28:29 through the Word of His Father 28:31 when He declared... 28:43 [uplifting music] 28:46 ♪♪ |
Revised 2025-04-17