It Is Written Canada

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Series Code: IIWC

Program Code: IIWC202429S


00:04 [theme music]
00:07 ♪♪
00:39 [calm music]
00:43 ♪♪
00:45 >> Welcome to
00:46 It Is Written Canada.
00:47 Thank you for joining us.
00:48 Perhaps you voice the complaint,
00:50 I just don't feel heard.
00:53 We all crave the connection
00:55 that comes from at least
00:56 one person giving us
00:58 a listening ear.
01:00 This kind of deep listening,
01:02 healthy listening, is a skill.
01:06 >> How do we listen in a way
01:07 that enhances connection
01:09 with the people we love?
01:11 What listening habits
01:13 have we fallen into that are
01:14 destroying that connection?
01:17 The way we listen to those
01:19 we love can profoundly determine
01:22 the level of connection
01:23 we enjoy with them.
01:25 >> Today on
01:26 It Is Written Canada,
01:27 our special guest is
01:28 Pastor Bill Spangler,
01:30 who has led churches in
01:32 the maritime Provinces,
01:33 British Columbia and Alberta,
01:36 retiring from ministry
01:37 in 2020.
01:40 He has a Bachelor's of Theology,
01:43 a masters of Divinity degree,
01:45 and has trained and is certified
01:48 as a family mediator
01:50 and life coach.
01:53 >> Bill is married to
01:54 Gwen Yosako, and they are
01:56 parents to two daughters
01:57 and enjoy two grandchildren.
02:01 Bill is the author of the book,
02:02 Lessons From the Wilderness,
02:05 a catalog of life lessons
02:07 that are useful to anyone
02:09 seeking personal growth
02:11 and skills for
02:12 making relationships work.
02:16 >> Pastor Bill Spangler,
02:17 thank you for joining us again
02:18 on It Is Written Canada.
02:20 >> It's my privilege to be here
02:22 again one more time.
02:24 >> Pastor Bill, in the book
02:26 that you wrote,
02:27 Lessons From the Wilderness,
02:28 there's a whole chapter about
02:31 listening.
02:32 Why is listening so important?
02:34 Aren't we all good listeners?
02:37 >> Interesting question, René,
02:39 and I called that chapter,
02:41 "Ears Are For More Than
02:42 Holding Up Our Glasses."
02:43 Listening is very crucial
02:46 to good relationships.
02:48 So we do learn life lessons
02:50 as we go, life skills as we go.
02:53 We grow up.
02:54 We learn by the knocks of life
02:56 and by interacting with kids
02:57 in school and with
02:59 our teenage peers and our
03:01 parents and our siblings.
03:02 We learn all kinds of things.
03:04 And there is no place to go
03:07 that I'm aware of
03:09 where we get a degree in
03:11 life skills.
03:12 We can get a degree in
03:13 all manner of careers and...
03:18 ...things to do.
03:20 But I don't know where to get
03:21 a certificate on life skills.
03:23 And listening is probably one of
03:25 the most crucial life skills
03:27 that there is.
03:29 I think that listening
03:32 will determine whether we are
03:33 really connected with the people
03:35 that matter to us, or whether
03:37 we're living in a relationship
03:39 that is just kind of surface.
03:42 It all depends on how safe
03:44 we make it for others
03:45 or how safe they make it for us.
03:49 Some people we like to talk to
03:50 and can talk to easily,
03:53 and some people we would
03:55 never share our hearts with.
03:58 I have friends that no matter
03:59 how many months it is between
04:01 seeing them, we can just sort of
04:04 pick up right where we were
04:05 because we know that
04:06 relationship is safe and
04:09 strong and solid
04:10 and other relationships,
04:12 "How's the weather?" and,
04:14 you know, and that kind of
04:15 thing and we leave it at that
04:16 because there is no depth there
04:19 by choice or whatever reason.
04:21 So our safety level
04:23 is often dependent upon
04:26 how we listen.
04:28 So I learned these lessons
04:29 when I was studying to be
04:30 a life coach and it was
04:33 new to me.
04:34 And I was an adult and thinking
04:36 that I knew how to listen.
04:38 Boy, did I have lots to learn.
04:40 So here's what I learned.
04:42 There's a level one listening.
04:44 So level one listening is
04:47 not bad, it just doesn't
04:49 offer depth
04:52 in connection.
04:54 It's the kind of listening
04:56 that we do when we need details.
04:59 So we need to know...
05:02 ...can you take the children
05:04 to school on Thursday?
05:06 Can you pick them up
05:07 after school early on Thursday?
05:09 Oh, okay.
05:09 What time do I need to do?
05:10 What time is the
05:12 dental appointment?
05:13 What do I need to pick up
05:14 at the store?
05:16 It's just the details
05:18 that I need to know because
05:19 I'm going to be responsible to
05:21 follow through on those things.
05:23 But often what happens,
05:25 we get talking to somebody and
05:27 we listen to them
05:28 at level one.
05:31 And so they will say something
05:33 to us, and
05:35 a level one responds
05:37 in a way that is
05:39 all about me.
05:41 So Mike says something to me
05:43 and my response is he's maybe
05:45 starting to tell me a story.
05:47 Maybe he's telling me a story
05:49 about something that
05:50 he's going through, or something
05:53 that one of his family members
05:54 are going through
05:55 or there's something hard
05:56 and I'll quickly deflect it,
05:59 you know, or I'll have another,
06:01 I'll have a response that
06:03 I have a better story than that,
06:05 you know.
06:06 I just found out that my─
06:08 he might say, "I've just
06:09 found out that my mother
06:12 was diagnosed with cancer."
06:14 "Oh, well, what kind of
06:15 cancer was it?"
06:16 "Well, it's this kind of─"
06:17 "Oh, it's okay.
06:18 It'll be fine, because
06:19 my uncle had that and
06:20 he's fine today,
06:22 so don't worry about it.
06:23 It's fine."
06:24 That's level one.
06:25 I'm telling
06:26 my perspective
06:28 I'm making about me
06:29 and my story, and it minimizes
06:32 his story.
06:33 Level one listening judges.
06:36 You know, somebody
06:37 makes a statement and says
06:40 whatever, and I respond
06:42 by saying, "Well, I don't think
06:43 that's a good idea.
06:44 I think that's crazy.
06:46 I don't know why you would
06:47 think that.
06:48 How did you ever come up with
06:49 an idea like that?"
06:51 Well, it backs them up then
06:53 and they don't want to
06:54 say anymore because
06:56 they share their ideas and
06:59 dreams to be responded to,
07:02 not to be shut down.
07:04 So when we get to know people
07:05 early in a relationship,
07:07 like I got to know my wife
07:10 skating around a skating rink.
07:12 We skated for a long time
07:13 that night, just chatting and
07:15 getting to know each other and
07:17 finding out about her siblings
07:19 and my siblings and my parents
07:20 and her parents and
07:22 that kind of thing.
07:24 There was nothing in-depth
07:25 in that conversation.
07:26 It was all level one, because
07:28 that's how relationships start.
07:30 But then if we want more,
07:32 we have to do
07:34 something different.
07:36 Level one
07:38 is really a kind of a
07:39 selfish way to listen.
07:41 I need the details.
07:43 I need the story.
07:44 I need to have you know
07:46 where I'm at.
07:47 And sometimes, like I said,
07:50 it's necessary, but often
07:52 it's very destructive to
07:55 going to any depth in
07:57 the relationship that
07:58 we might want.
07:59 >> So because I'm so intuitive,
08:01 I'm guessing that because
08:02 there's a level one,
08:04 there's a level two.
08:05 >> There is a level two, Mike.
08:06 >> So what does level two
08:08 look like, Bill?
08:09 >> So level two listening
08:10 goes to a different place.
08:12 Level one you start talking
08:14 and I make the conversation
08:16 all about me.
08:17 Level two, you start talking
08:20 and I click in and I make the
08:21 conversation all about you.
08:24 What it is you're
08:25 talking to me about.
08:27 So I picture it this way.
08:29 If I want to do good
08:30 level two listening,
08:31 when somebody starts to speak,
08:33 I picture them as picking up
08:35 the microphone
08:36 and I let them talk as long as
08:38 they have the microphone.
08:40 The only thing I will ask
08:42 or interject is
08:44 just something for clarity
08:46 to know more about what it is
08:47 that you're talking about,
08:49 what it is that you're
08:50 experiencing.
08:51 I make the
08:52 level one conversation
08:54 all about me,
08:56 but at level two,
08:57 I make it all about you
08:59 and what's happening to you.
09:01 So let's go back to this story.
09:02 "My mother just got diagnosed
09:04 and it doesn't look good."
09:07 "Oh, man...
09:08 ...that must be tough.
09:10 What's that like for you?
09:12 What's happening with you?
09:15 How is she doing?
09:19 What are you learning
09:20 through all of this?"
09:22 Those kinds of questions that
09:24 go to your heart and go to
09:26 your experience and it has
09:27 nothing to do with me
09:30 or what I want to know.
09:32 Even my curiosity.
09:34 Level one listening would be
09:35 the question that says,
09:36 "Oh, what kind of cancer
09:37 does she have?"
09:38 That's not necessary
09:39 for me to know.
09:40 You told me that she's
09:41 diagnosed, that's your story.
09:44 If you want to tell me
09:45 what it is,
09:46 that's also your story.
09:47 I don't get to ask the details
09:50 in level two listening,
09:51 I wanna ask about
09:53 your experience.
09:54 I wanna ask about your heart.
09:56 I wanna ask about your emotions.
09:58 I wanna ask about your struggle.
10:00 I wanna ask about your learning
10:02 and how this is impacting you.
10:06 So if I go back to the story of
10:09 me skating all evening
10:10 with my wife...
10:13 ...I want that relationship
10:15 to go deeper.
10:16 So then at some point
10:18 in some level,
10:19 we started to talk about things
10:20 that were involving our dreams
10:23 or our goals or the things
10:25 that matter to us,
10:27 the things that are
10:28 important to us,
10:29 the things that make us happy.
10:30 The─ our walk with God.
10:33 Things that are deeper than
10:35 just the surface stuff.
10:37 And here's what makes
10:39 conversations really work.
10:41 If you start opening up to me
10:44 about something going on in your
10:46 experience, if I...
10:50 ...push back on that right away,
10:52 the conversation will shut down
10:53 and you'll say,
10:55 "Well, I'm not doing that again.
10:56 I'm just gonna go to level one.
10:57 I'll stay at level one.
10:58 It's safe down there.
10:59 We can talk about
11:00 the weather there.
11:01 We can talk about
11:03 the news there.
11:04 We can talk about
11:05 the simple things there."
11:07 But if I wanna get into
11:08 a relationship,
11:11 there is a time that I have to
11:12 test the dreams, passions,
11:14 goals, vision.
11:16 And this is where we make it
11:18 safe for the people that
11:20 matter to us.
11:22 If we help them
11:23 explore that goal
11:24 and explore that vision,
11:26 explore that dream,
11:28 make it safe for them,
11:30 even if we don't agree...
11:34 ...it can make
11:35 all the difference
11:36 in the world and how that
11:37 relationship builds.
11:39 When we feel heard...
11:42 ...when we start to talk.
11:44 When we feel like it's safe,
11:47 we open up our hearts.
11:49 So...
11:51 ...parents to children.
11:53 Children can say things that
11:55 in our experience,
11:57 we have already learned
11:58 that's not gonna to work.
12:00 We've already learned
12:01 that's not safe.
12:03 We've already learned
12:04 there's danger here.
12:06 But if we respond
12:07 to our children that way,
12:09 they may back away and never...
12:13 ...trust us again with
12:14 some of their deeper stuff
12:16 or their questions.
12:18 Children can come to parents
12:20 and start saying, You know what?
12:22 I'm having questions about...
12:24 ...this.
12:25 I'm having questions about God.
12:27 I'm having questions about
12:28 church or something where the
12:30 values that have been built into
12:32 that family have been strong.
12:33 But now all of a sudden,
12:34 a child comes and, "I'm having
12:36 questions about this."
12:38 Level one listening
12:39 will immediately shut that down.
12:42 "Well come on.
12:43 You know what we believe.
12:44 You know what's right.
12:45 You know what the Bible says.
12:46 You know..."
12:47 That's all level one.
12:49 Level two says, "Wow.
12:52 So let's talk.
12:54 Let's hear this."
12:55 And even if when the child
12:58 expresses their heart
12:59 and lets their heart bleed...
13:04 ...even then,
13:05 when we don't agree,
13:06 how we manage it from there
13:08 is very, very important.
13:11 I think of an illustration
13:13 of a little child
13:14 coming home from school,
13:16 throwing his books down and
13:17 throwing his backpack down.
13:19 "I'm never going back to school
13:20 again!"
13:22 And if a parent is at level one,
13:24 they'll say something like,
13:26 "Well, of course you are.
13:27 We paid good money for you
13:28 to go to this school and
13:29 you're gonna to keep going.
13:30 So just go to your room and
13:32 have a glass of orange juice and
13:34 and I'll bring it to you
13:35 and a cookie, and you'll
13:36 feel better in a little while.
13:37 When you change your attitude,
13:39 and, you know, you can
13:40 come back out."
13:42 That's level one.
13:44 Level two would say,
13:46 "Wow, sounds like somebody
13:47 had a bad day.
13:50 Why don't you go put your books
13:52 away and all them get a cookie
13:54 and some juice, and we'll talk."
13:56 And the child comes back.
13:58 "Well, what was so hard
13:59 about today?"
14:00 "Well, you know, this happened,"
14:01 and let the parent explore
14:04 what's going on with the child.
14:07 That's the difference
14:08 in relationships
14:10 that will happen based on
14:12 how well we listened to them.
14:15 >> So, Pastor Bill,
14:16 it sounds like really
14:18 when we're using level two
14:20 listening, it's really
14:22 all about the talker,
14:24 the one that's
14:25 doing the talking.
14:26 It's all about them.
14:28 And all about
14:29 really reaching their heart.
14:31 Like you said, there's that
14:32 emotional connection
14:34 that we are fulfilling or
14:37 forming once we
14:40 are practicing listening
14:42 on a level two, because it's
14:44 not about me, it's about
14:46 the talker.
14:47 >> That's exactly what
14:48 level two is.
14:50 It's letting the conversation
14:51 unfold.
14:52 It has nothing to do with
14:54 whether I agree.
14:55 I can listen to somebody at
14:57 level two and not agree with
14:59 anything they're telling me.
15:01 But if I'm a good listener,
15:03 I can stay focused on them.
15:06 I can check in with them
15:07 in my own head and say, "Okay,
15:09 go to level two here
15:10 and pay attention."
15:12 And it can happen easily,
15:15 even if everything they're
15:16 saying, I have a
15:17 whole different worldview
15:19 or a whole different perspective
15:20 on the very same topic.
15:22 That happened to me
15:23 just recently.
15:24 I guess maybe that's why
15:25 I'm saying it.
15:26 It just, within the last week,
15:27 a lady began to share with me
15:29 some of her philosophical views
15:31 on God and
15:33 the spiritual nature
15:34 of the world.
15:35 And, I have a biblical
15:37 worldview, and some of the
15:38 things she was saying
15:40 would not be backed up
15:41 by the Scripture.
15:42 But I just thought, in my head
15:44 I said, "Stay at level two,"
15:46 and I and I connected in
15:47 and let her talk.
15:48 And in the end, I said to her,
15:51 "What I really appreciate
15:52 about you and me is that
15:54 we can agree to disagree.
15:55 And I would disagree for these
15:57 reasons, but we can still
15:58 be friends."
16:00 That's what level two is
16:01 all about, and that's where
16:02 connections really happen.
16:04 >> So someone may be listening
16:06 to this and thinking, "Okay,
16:08 I'm a level two listener.
16:10 Do I ever have anything to say?"
16:14 >> Yes, the level two listener
16:16 does get a chance
16:17 to say something. [laughs]
16:19 So level two listening,
16:21 if you're talking to me
16:23 about something that's going on
16:24 in your life, in your
16:25 experience, with your children,
16:27 with your relationship,
16:28 with whatever, I can ask
16:30 lots of questions along the way,
16:32 but the questions will all be
16:34 about, "Tell me more.
16:36 Could you say that
16:37 in different words?
16:38 Help me understand
16:39 what you meant when you said..."
16:41 All my talking, all my questions
16:43 will be about exploring
16:46 that person's thoughts.
16:48 Then when the
16:50 story is out
16:51 and when the,
16:54 maybe the energy
16:55 around the topic is beginning to
16:56 wane a little bit,
16:58 then it would be very possible
17:00 for you to become
17:02 the talker,
17:03 take the mic and say things
17:06 like, "I really appreciate
17:08 what you said.
17:09 I want to share
17:10 some of my thoughts
17:11 on that topic.
17:13 This is what I have learned."
17:15 If I take the mic and say,
17:18 "Well, I've listened to what
17:19 you said and I don't agree with
17:20 any of it," now I've gone
17:22 right back to level one again.
17:24 But it's very reasonable
17:26 and right that I should be
17:28 able to share my perspective
17:29 on something.
17:31 However,
17:32 if my goal in
17:34 beginning to talk now
17:36 is about proving to you that
17:38 you're wrong and that I'm right,
17:40 I'm going to wash out
17:41 the whole conversation.
17:44 I think that we would
17:47 do very well if we would
17:48 just remember, I acknowledge
17:50 your position.
17:51 This is my position.
17:54 If I acknowledge your position,
17:55 but this is my position,
17:58 now I've washed it out.
17:59 If I acknowledge your position,
18:01 period.
18:03 This is my position.
18:04 Now I'm allowing your position
18:06 to stand, I'm allowing your
18:07 perspective to be real,
18:09 can be on the table,
18:10 and I'm going to add mine.
18:12 So they're both equivalent,
18:14 they're both valid,
18:16 but I haven't...
18:19 ...washed it out by
18:21 pushing it away.
18:24 >> Pastor Bill, this reminds me
18:25 of a book that Mike and I read,
18:27 and the book was entitled
18:29 “Doing Life with Your
18:30 Adult Children”
18:32 by Jim Byrnes.
18:33 And he mentioned something
18:35 over there, and it says,
18:37 he says that when we give
18:40 our adult children,
18:41 this with our adult children,
18:43 when we give them
18:45 unsolicited advice,
18:47 they see it as criticism
18:50 and they're gonna shut down.
18:52 And so this reminds me when
18:54 we're giving unsolicited advice,
18:57 we are speaking more,
18:59 maybe because of our experience
19:01 and we don't want them to
19:02 make the same mistakes
19:03 as what we did.
19:04 So when we're giving
19:06 unsolicited advice,
19:07 we are actually being
19:08 a level one listener.
19:09 >> Absolutely at level one.
19:11 >> Yeah, and so they're
19:12 feeling like, "Wow.
19:14 We're feeling criticized.
19:15 We're feeling condemn.
19:17 We're feeling judged."
19:18 And so...
19:19 ...they just shut down, right?
19:20 >> So the level of connection
19:22 grows higher and higher
19:24 and higher.
19:25 We think about a deep connection
19:26 and higher is deep
19:27 in this illustration,
19:29 we go higher and higher and
19:30 higher towards what I would call
19:32 in-to-me-see, or "intimacy"
19:34 spelled differently.
19:36 We all want to be seen into.
19:38 We all want to be known
19:39 in our hearts.
19:41 and that happens when we listen
19:43 or when we are listened to.
19:46 So if two people have learned to
19:47 listen deeply to each other,
19:49 the depth of in-to-me-see
19:51 can grow to a place that is
19:53 unbelievably rewarding.
19:56 >> That's very important
19:57 understanding that in-to-me-see,
19:59 but who allows you to see
20:00 into me is me.
20:02 And if you shut down
20:03 the conversation by the way
20:05 you're listening, then I'm
20:06 gonna quit...
20:07 >> Exactly.
20:08 >> ...showing you into me, yep.
20:09 >> Exactly.
20:10 If I don't make it safe
20:11 for you to talk,
20:12 you're never going to share
20:13 your heart with me.
20:15 >> Right.
20:15 >> And so people have
20:18 phoned me after reading the book
20:20 and saying, "Pastor Bill,
20:22 you nailed me.
20:24 I'm a level one listener.
20:25 I didn't realize
20:26 what a poor listener that I am."
20:30 And I'm glad that people
20:32 come to that awareness
20:33 and realize that there is
20:35 a different way to do this.
20:37 >> So, Pastor Bill,
20:38 what practical steps can we take
20:41 or can we do
20:42 to really become
20:44 a level two listener?
20:46 >> It's about reminding
20:47 ourselves as we're
20:48 talking to people,
20:50 go to level two.
20:51 Stay in level two.
20:53 Think in level two.
20:55 Give them the honour.
20:57 Give them the mic.
20:59 Recognize that they're
21:01 telling a story that they
21:02 need to be able to express.
21:06 There's an acronym that says,
21:08 “Wait,” W-A-I-T:
21:10 Why Am I Talking?
21:14 If we could use that discipline,
21:16 we could be good
21:17 level two listeners.
21:18 Well, why am I talking?
21:20 Why do I need to say
21:21 what I'm about to say?
21:23 Is it going to enhance
21:24 the conversation
21:26 with Mike or with René or with
21:28 whoever I'm talking to?
21:29 Is it gonna help them develop
21:31 their story and their thoughts?
21:33 If it's for any other reason...
21:36 ...I just wanna insert a joke
21:38 because I'm a funny guy,
21:39 or I just want to deflect
21:41 what you just said or whatever.
21:43 If I'm taking away from
21:44 your story, then it's gone to
21:46 level one.
21:48 So it's a discipline.
21:49 It's learning, but it's not
21:50 hard, it's just the discipline
21:52 of paying attention.
21:54 This person has the mic.
21:56 Let them talk.
21:58 Help me develop their story.
22:01 >> Okay, and...
22:03 ...what about level three
22:05 of listening?
22:06 Because it's a level three,
22:07 right?
22:08 >> There is a level three.
22:09 We stop at level three,
22:10 but there is a three.
22:11 Level three pays attention to
22:14 the body language,
22:16 the unspoken words
22:18 in the conversation,
22:20 the things that are happening.
22:21 It could be the look
22:23 on a person's face.
22:25 It could be if they
22:26 roll their eyes at us.
22:27 It could be if we see
22:28 a tear develop,
22:29 it could be if they're smiling
22:31 or if they've lost their smile.
22:33 We're paying attention
22:35 to the atmosphere
22:37 within the conversation.
22:39 So let me give an illustration.
22:41 I came home, Gwen, my wife,
22:43 was, there was tears
22:45 and she was home alone
22:46 and there's tears
22:47 and her face is red and
22:50 I said, "Oh...
22:52 ...what's happening?
22:53 What's going on?"
22:55 And she said, "Oh, it's
22:57 that time of year
22:59 when Kristen died and
23:02 I've just been thinking
23:03 a lot about her
23:04 and remembering
23:07 those last few days."
23:09 And so level one listening
23:11 would say, "Yeah, well, that's
23:13 three years ago.
23:14 We gotta move on."
23:16 But I went into level two
23:18 and I said, "Yeah, it's
23:20 that time of year, let's talk."
23:22 So we sat down and we began to
23:24 talk, reminisce about
23:26 our memories of that week and...
23:29 But then we began to remember
23:31 other things and what a joy
23:33 she was to us
23:34 and the fun things.
23:37 And pretty soon we're laughing.
23:39 And because I just let her heart
23:41 be real
23:43 in that moment.
23:44 And that's what
23:45 level two listening does,
23:47 it pays attention to the
23:49 level three that's going on
23:51 and then slips into level two.
23:53 What's going on for you?
23:55 Now, if I said to you,
23:56 "I see the tear.
23:58 You always put tears in─
23:59 you always start crying
24:01 when you wanna manipulate
24:02 the conversation and
24:04 you're just trying to get
24:05 your own way again."
24:06 Okay, that's level one.
24:08 Level two just says,
24:10 "I see your tears.
24:11 What are the tears about?"
24:14 I think of a couple of stories
24:16 very briefly in the Bible.
24:18 The angel came to Zechariah and
24:20 said, "You're gonna have a son."
24:23 And he said, "Yeah, well,
24:24 how can this be?
24:25 I'm an old man and
24:26 my wife is an old woman."
24:29 And the angel said,
24:30 "You're gonna have a son
24:31 and you're not gonna talk
24:32 until that day."
24:35 An angel came to Mary and said,
24:36 "You're gonna have a son."
24:39 "Well, how can this be?
24:40 I'm a virgin.
24:41 I'm not married."
24:43 And, "Well, it's gonna be
24:45 like this."
24:46 And she said,
24:47 "May it be as you have said."
24:50 She was level two
24:53 thinking about, "Okay,
24:54 I don't understand,
24:55 but I hear you."
24:57 Whereas his question,
24:58 almost the very same question,
25:00 was almost defiant.
25:02 "This is crazy.
25:03 I don't know what you're saying.
25:04 I can't have a child."
25:06 And so we can even do
25:08 level two listening with God.
25:10 When we have to go through
25:11 hard times, "God, what do You
25:13 want to teach me here?
25:14 What's this about?"
25:15 Rather than, "God, why are You
25:17 asking me to go through this?
25:18 Why are You putting this on me?"
25:20 That's level one.
25:21 Level two listening with God
25:23 will take us into a place of
25:24 intimacy with Him as well.
25:26 Listening is such a
25:28 wonderful tool and life skill.
25:31 >> So, Bill, we've come to
25:32 the end of our time together,
25:33 I wonder if you can pray
25:34 for our viewers.
25:35 Maybe someone is just listening
25:36 to this kind of a conversation
25:39 for the first time and says,
25:40 "Whoa, this is something
25:41 I wasn't aware of.
25:43 Help me to be
25:44 a better listener."
25:45 And maybe there's someone
25:46 who's actually wanting
25:48 others to listen to them
25:50 and for them to have someone
25:53 who's a real good listening ear.
25:56 >> Glad to.
25:57 Dear Father in Heaven,
25:58 thank You so much for
26:00 calling us to a place of
26:02 intimacy with You.
26:04 But may we turn that around
26:06 and give that gift to others,
26:07 the ones that we love.
26:09 Maybe there's people
26:10 listening today who have
26:11 struggled with a depth
26:13 of relationship.
26:14 I pray that You will
26:16 speak to them in a way that
26:17 they will listen deeper.
26:19 They will learn to relate
26:20 in a way that will build
26:22 confidence, build safety
26:24 so that the connection will be
26:26 deeper and stronger
26:27 in every way.
26:29 Most of all, may we be
26:30 good listeners of You.
26:32 Thank You for all You do for us.
26:33 In Jesus name, amen.
26:36 >> Amen.
26:37 Bill, thank you for
26:39 sharing with us
26:40 another one of the life lessons
26:42 that you learned through your
26:43 wilderness experience.
26:45 It's been such a pleasure
26:46 having you here today.
26:48 >> It's been my pleasure
26:49 to be here and I love
26:50 talking about these things.
26:52 [inspirational music]
26:55 ♪♪
27:05 >> Friends, whenever life
27:07 doesn't make sense
27:08 or you are feeling down
27:10 and discouraged, misunderstood,
27:12 like no one is listening.
27:14 We recommend you pick up
27:16 this little book,
27:17 Help In Daily Living.
27:21 >> We would like to send
27:22 this book to you
27:23 free of charge if you're
27:25 feeling like the wheels are
27:27 falling off or your life is
27:29 becoming unglued, or if the
27:31 wheels are simply spinning
27:33 and you're not getting anywhere.
27:34 You will find solutions
27:36 in this little book,
27:37 our free offer,
27:39 Help In Daily Living.
27:41 >> Before you go, we would
27:43 like to thank all of you
27:44 who have supported the ministry
27:46 of It Is Written Canada
27:48 with your prayers
27:49 and financial contributions.
27:52 Without your support,
27:54 this television ministry
27:56 could not have reached
27:58 so many people
27:59 for so many decades.
28:01 >> Yes, thank you.
28:03 And we would like to invite you
28:05 to follow us on Instagram and
28:06 Facebook and subscribe to our
28:09 YouTube channel, and also
28:10 listen to our podcasts.
28:13 >> Friends, if you want to
28:14 develop the kind of
28:16 listening skills Jesus
28:17 demonstrated in His life,
28:20 we recommend you open the Bible
28:23 where it is recorded that
28:25 our Saviour found His assurance
28:27 to defeat the devil
28:29 through the Word of His Father
28:31 when He declared...
28:43 [uplifting music]
28:46 ♪♪


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Revised 2025-04-17