Participants:
Series Code: LTBW
Program Code: LTBW190027S
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00:01 The following program features real clients
00:03 discussing sensitive issues. 00:05 The views and opinions expressed in this program 00:07 don't necessarily reflect 00:09 that of 3ABN's Dare to Dream Network. 00:11 Viewer discretion is advised. 00:49 Hi, I'm Dr. Kim Logan Nowlin, and welcome to Live to be Well. 00:54 I want to welcome my special guest, 00:56 Darryl Davidson. 00:57 How are doing, Darryl? 00:59 I'm doing all right. How are you? 01:00 Good. 01:01 When you hear the words Live To Be Well, 01:03 what comes to mind? 01:04 Excitement, happiness, joy, creative thinking. 01:10 A peace of mind? 01:12 Definitely, a peace of mind. 01:13 Yes. 01:14 You reached out and you called me 01:16 for an appointment? 01:17 Correct. Why did you reach out to me? 01:20 I was having breakdowns 01:22 that I truly couldn't understand. 01:24 And I talked to a good friend of mine 01:27 who actually recommended you, 01:29 And said that you helped him through a lot of things 01:31 that he was going through. 01:33 And I thought to myself for a while, 01:34 because he gave me your number 01:35 about weeks before I even contacted you. 01:38 I thought it took a minute for you to call me. 01:39 It took a minute. 01:41 But it finally came down. 01:44 I had one break down at work too 01:46 where I had to leave 01:47 and he was like, bro, just called in. 01:49 So, I asked God to guide my hands and I called you. 01:54 And so, it was basically to help me understand 01:59 where these breakdowns were coming from. 02:00 I see. 02:01 Because really, you know, 02:03 everyone does not live to be well. 02:04 No. 02:05 You know, I think about why I as a clinician, 02:08 my impact in people's lives. 02:10 And I remember you walking through the door, 02:11 I said, you know, 02:13 this great looking guy and well dressed. 02:16 I said, "Why are you here?" 02:17 But we can't judge a book by its cover. 02:20 Absolutely not. 02:21 And when you sat down with me and then started to, 02:23 you know, even break down, 02:25 you cried in that first session. 02:27 I did. 02:28 You know, and it doesn't make you 02:30 less of a man or a woman. 02:32 God gave us tears to release. 02:34 So let's talk about your mental health. 02:38 Can we go back to your childhood? 02:39 Absolutely. 02:41 I believe my depression started when I was a kid. 02:46 I wouldn't say it was so much of like abuse or bullying. 02:50 It was more mentally, because I was a book nerd. 02:54 I was one of them kids 02:55 that didn't really play in the dirt 02:57 or go follow the big guys to work on cars. 03:01 And as they call them grease monkeys, 03:04 I wasn't one of those. 03:06 I was more of a sports nerd. 03:08 Okay. 03:09 So I will read in my books 03:10 and try to learn as much as about, 03:12 because I had a fascination with computers 03:13 at a very young age. 03:14 Really? Yeah. 03:16 Okay. 03:17 So my first interaction with a computer 03:19 was my grandmother not remembering her password 03:22 and I was able to crack her password for her. 03:23 Okay. 03:25 So that led me into reading more books about computers. 03:28 And when I wasn't reading, I was playing basketball. 03:30 Okay. 03:31 So a lot of the things was you soft 03:35 because I don't play with cars 03:37 or the trunk of trucks and worked on cars 03:39 and things like that. 03:41 The myths. 03:42 Yeah. 03:43 So that kind of gave me a little thing about myself, 03:48 little insecurity about myself to figure out 03:50 why I wasn't like everybody else 03:52 in the neighborhood. 03:53 So this started impacting your self-esteem 03:56 in a very early age? 03:57 Absolutely. 03:58 You know, when we were coming out, 04:00 we didn't know what low self-esteem was. 04:02 We didn't talk about substance abuse. 04:05 We didn't talk about mental health. 04:07 We didn't hear those terms even in the church. 04:09 And as I got older and older, I began to see mental health, 04:13 but I still didn't know what mental health 04:15 was until I began to start studying it 04:18 in my professional choice. 04:21 So as you got older, you know, 04:25 were you getting impacted by peer pressure? 04:29 For me, yes, because in my neighborhood 04:33 there were three guys that were, 04:36 they call it basketball phenomenals. 04:38 One of them was a guy 04:40 that I looked up to really well. 04:41 He was a neighborhood friend of mine. 04:43 His name was Sidney Mitchell. 04:44 He actually ended up dying before it was time. 04:48 He was still a senior in high school, 04:50 but the way he took me under his wing to play basketball, 04:54 I was considered the next Sidney Mitchell. 04:58 Who's had big time scouts come to the city. 05:01 So before I was even a freshman in high school, 05:06 it was, he going to be this, he going to be 05:08 that, it was just that pressure of being the next person. 05:13 Were you had that height on you at that time? 05:15 No. 05:16 Actually I didn't. 05:18 I didn't get my height until I wanna say 05:21 my freshman year of high school. 05:23 So you had the growth spur? 05:25 I have, I had an over summer growth spur as they call it, 05:29 but I was, I always can jump. 05:32 So I was dunking in the eighth grade. 05:35 So it was like, I was really big 05:38 when it came to basketball. 05:39 So instantly you have family members, 05:42 oh, he is going to get me a house. 05:43 He is going to buy this. 05:45 He is going to buy that. 05:46 The peer pressure of that alone, 05:49 especially for a kid, a young black kid. 05:53 Because when you think of sports, 05:54 you think of these young black athletes 05:57 and instantly becoming famous 05:58 and have to take care of their whole family. 06:01 And their entourage. 06:02 All right. 06:03 It's overwhelming. 06:05 Absolutely. So... 06:06 So you were getting those pressures 06:08 even before you even started the ninth grade? 06:10 Correct. 06:11 So when that started happening, 06:13 it's like, I mean, I lived up to it. 06:15 I played my hardest and everything, 06:17 but when you have that type of pressure, 06:20 it bothers you on the inside because it's like, is it, 06:24 are they there actually cheering for me 06:25 or are they just cheering for the money they think 06:28 that I'm going to make. 06:29 So you recognized that your grades 06:32 were still important though? 06:33 Yeah. My grades, I was a 4.0 student 06:34 All the way through? 06:36 All the way through high school. 06:37 All the way through high school? 06:38 All the way through high school. So. 06:40 I graduated with a 4.12. 06:41 You better, there's a 4 point, I knew it was a 4.4, 5, 6. 06:44 So you used to have straight A's and A pluses. 06:47 Yes. 06:48 So in that you went on to college? 06:50 Correct. 06:51 And what was your major? 06:53 Not technically, 06:54 No? 06:55 So I had a scare in high school 06:57 to where I thought I tore my knee, but I didn't. 06:59 Okay. 07:01 So around my junior year 07:03 is when I really started getting 07:06 those schools that I wanted to. 07:08 My dream school of choice was always UCLA. 07:12 Powerhouse basketball, 07:13 great computer science division. 07:15 And my senior year, my high school coach 07:20 kind of threw it away for me. 07:23 Because he started asking those types of questions. 07:25 Well, if you're signed, can I come along? 07:27 Oh, I see. 07:28 So that started to deter them from me becoming back to me. 07:33 So eventually I got a red shirt scholarship 07:37 from Austin Peay State University down in Tennessee. 07:39 What's a red shirt? What is that? 07:40 So red shirt means that you're not on a full scholarship. 07:43 You have to pretty much sit out and prove yourself 07:46 that first year. 07:48 Really? 07:49 Yeah, it, it's hard, but it wasn't for me 07:51 because I knew what I was capable of. 07:53 Okay. 07:54 But my mother didn't want me to leave the state. 07:56 She didn't want you to leave Michigan? 07:57 She didn't want me to leave Michigan. 07:59 Okay. 08:00 So that was kind of rough. 08:02 So I went to Wayne County Community College 08:04 but I didn't stay in the semester 08:06 because I was so sad I was. 08:08 At this time, I didn't know I was depressed. 08:09 You didn't even recognize... I didn't even... 08:11 There was something you didn't know. 08:12 I didn't know what it was. 08:14 It was always just suck it up and keep going. 08:15 So I ended up just doing a semester there. 08:19 It was crazy as my uncle was the coach. 08:20 He was the coach. 08:21 He was the coach and he knew something was wrong. 08:24 So he actually let me like, nope, 08:26 go ahead and take the semester off. 08:28 He didn't pressure me to do anything. 08:30 I didn't get back into college until, 08:34 I mean, let me get, let me, let me say this. 08:36 I went off and on, 08:37 took class here, took class there, 08:39 but I really didn't get focused on college 08:41 until 2008. 08:46 2008 is when I really started going back full time. 08:49 Yes. 08:50 And in that time I graduated, I finished. 08:54 Once I finally declared a major at WC3, I finished in 2013, 08:59 transferred over to university, Detroit Mercy for scholarship, 09:03 graduated there with my BS 09:05 in computer information systems. 09:07 And then my mentor there talked me 09:09 into doing the fast program, 09:11 which is getting your bachelor's 09:12 and your master's at the same time. 09:15 So I ended up getting my master's the following year. 09:19 What? 09:20 In intelligent analysis. Wow. 09:22 So what is intelligent analysis? 09:24 I mean, it sounds so huge. 09:26 What is that? 09:28 In a broad spectrum, it's cyber security. 09:31 It's computer science on drugs. 09:33 Meaning that it's cyber security looking for hackers, 09:37 looking for people who try to hack into government files, 09:42 research and development, 09:44 looking at the broad spectrum of things with drones. 09:47 So like having a drone fly over the city 09:50 and point out the weak spots in the city 09:52 to where say a terrorist attack will happen 09:55 or a violent gang can take over that control. 09:59 We will be able to see 10:01 that and use our analysis to figure out 10:03 how we can stop that 10:05 from even happening before it happens. 10:07 Is that right? 10:08 Yeah, it was Terrorist attacks? 10:10 Terrorist attacks, gang attacks. 10:12 All of that? Broad spectrum. Yes. 10:14 I remember the bombing at the... 10:19 What was that in Boston, the marathon? 10:20 The Boston bombing? 10:22 Yeah. 10:23 We actually had to do a research project 10:25 on that to see how we would have been able to stop it 10:27 if we would had the technology that we have now, 10:31 using the technology we would have, 10:33 we have now it was, the project was to see 10:35 if we can stop the bombing from happening. 10:38 And with the technology that we have today, 10:41 we absolutely could have stopped it from happening, 10:43 because you have the drones, you have the cameras, 10:46 you have the angles to where you can see things 10:48 from a different spectrum. 10:50 So let me ask you this. 10:51 So your depression, you know, were you still dealing 10:55 with bouts of depression? 10:57 Here you are, you got your bachelor's, 10:58 you got your master's, 11:00 were you still dealing with sadness 11:02 and of crying spells? 11:03 Absolutely. 11:04 Insomnia? Absolutely. 11:06 But you still did not address it? 11:08 Because you know, growing up as a black guy, a black male, 11:13 you hear, it ain't depression, suck it up. 11:16 You just quit being weak, be stronger. 11:19 You just, that's just, 11:20 just your mind playing tricks on you. 11:22 We don't believe in depression. 11:23 You know, that's all we hear. 11:25 They don't understand 11:27 that depression is actually real. 11:29 It's very real. 11:31 It's very real. 11:32 And I think that was one of the things 11:34 that my father went through 11:36 before he ended up eventually committed suicide. 11:40 Your father committed suicide? 11:41 My father committed suicide, 11:43 my ninth grade year of high school. 11:45 I'm so sorry to hear that. 11:46 So it was rough, 11:47 but that, I believe that would trigger. 11:50 That was a part of my trigger. 11:51 Of course. 11:53 Because we had really just reconnected 11:56 and getting to know each other. 11:57 And in that same year of us reconnecting and getting, 12:00 knowing each other, it happened. 12:03 So it was really hard. 12:05 My first year of high school was really difficult. 12:08 I can only imagine. 12:09 I still got the grades that I need to get. 12:13 But it was times where I would skip school. 12:15 No. 12:16 Oh, yeah. 12:17 It was times where my mother would drop me off 12:19 at the front door and I'll be in her home 12:22 because I did came out the back door. 12:23 Oh, my goodness. 12:24 And they called her up to the school one day 12:26 and asked her, why doesn't he like school? 12:29 She was like, what do you mean? 12:31 He's not here, but he has straight A's 12:34 on everything in here. 12:36 She's like, how's that possible? 12:38 He don't study for tests. 12:39 He come in, he takes his test. 12:40 He has to go to the bathroom and he leaves. 12:42 What? 12:43 And that would be your routine? 12:45 That will be my routine. 12:46 Didn't they had school counselors? 12:47 So that was never recommended by your counselor 12:51 to see a therapist at the school? 12:53 When you don't know? 12:55 When you don't know, 12:57 you don't know how to address it. 12:58 You don't know how to go at it. 12:59 You don't know how to attack it. 13:01 Okay. 13:02 And that's the thing that I love about you 13:04 is because, coming to you first day out, 13:08 the first question out of the box, why? 13:10 Why? 13:12 Is this all right. 13:13 You did. 13:15 I had to sit back and say, okay, 13:16 this is going to take about 15, 20 minutes. 13:18 I think he went through three boxes of my tissue. 13:20 All right. 13:22 And you just, you couldn't even speak, 13:24 you couldn't even talk. 13:26 And I sat back, I put my pen down and I said, 13:29 it's all right, take your time. 13:31 And I'd never heard those words before. 13:34 I never heard those words before. 13:35 And I've never really cried like that before. 13:38 I always was told to suck it in, hold it back. 13:41 And when you do that and you put stuff on the back burner 13:45 and bury it so much, 13:48 eventually it starts attacking you from the inside. 13:49 Yeah. 13:51 That masking. We call it masking. 13:52 I call it a facade. 13:53 Facade? Yes. 13:55 I had a conversation 13:56 with a great friend of mine yesterday 13:58 and she was like, 14:00 "Boy, you ain't dealing with no depression. 14:02 I see you laughing. I see you joking. 14:04 You helped me get a job 14:05 by doing a whole oral presentation for me." 14:08 I said, "It's a facade." 14:10 It's a facade. 14:11 I can do that for other people, 14:12 but I can't do that for myself. 14:14 That's right. 14:15 And she was like, "Well, what triggers it?" 14:16 I said, "I don't know. 14:18 That's why I seek professional help." 14:20 And I believe being with you and going through this, 14:24 I believe that if we tell, 14:28 well, we are tackling the right way. 14:29 Yes. 14:31 But it will definitely lead me to understand what my triggers 14:33 are, what puts me in those positions 14:36 and how I will be able to control it 14:38 once we get to that level. 14:40 And that's why we do testing assessment. 14:42 But you know, what was your impression 14:45 when you came in I asked you, would it be 14:47 all right to have prayer? 14:49 I always ask. 14:50 What was your first impression when I said that? 14:54 It's crazy because, a couple of things 14:56 went through my mind. 14:58 The first thing that came to my mind was like, okay, 15:01 is it going to be one of them? 15:02 One of them what? 15:04 So most people who claim to be counselors, 15:09 they just hit you with Bible verse 15:11 after Bible verse, 15:13 after scripture after scripture, 15:14 and then tell you, okay, you're going to be okay. 15:17 So, but the way you went at it, it was different. 15:21 For some reason, it gave me a little hope. 15:24 Like, okay, maybe this will work 15:26 because you didn't come at it with a scripture first 15:30 and then say, let's pray. 15:31 You said let's pray. 15:33 And when you were praying, I was listening to you. 15:36 And the words that stuck to me 15:38 was let's find a way to guide Darryl through this problem. 15:42 It wasn't... Let's be successful. 15:46 Let's do this. 15:47 Let's, no, it was, let's help him, 15:50 guide him through this problem. 15:52 You will speak like, I felt like 15:54 you were speaking for me. 15:55 Yes. 15:57 And that's what made me even more comfortable to do that. 16:00 You know, this is what we call intercessory prayer. 16:02 We pray for people who may be away from us. 16:06 They could be living in another state or country 16:08 or right there in the same room. 16:10 And I know that God guides everything I try to do 16:15 because I personally as a human, 16:17 I would do more damage. 16:19 But with the guidance of the Holy Spirit, 16:21 He allows me and I have to listen to God. 16:24 And then you remember, 16:26 I got your folder from Ms. Anderson. 16:28 I said, I'll be right with you. 16:30 I went in the back. 16:31 You know what I did when I went in the back? 16:32 What is that? 16:34 I prayed over it. Wow. 16:35 Because I said, now, God, 16:36 you know him way better than I do. 16:38 I have no idea what's going to happen here, 16:42 but please, Lord, help me 16:44 so that I could be Your conduit. 16:45 I could be Your vessel. 16:47 Because isn't that what we're here to do to be a vessel. 16:49 So now let's go back to depression. 16:52 Okay. 16:53 I know you had crying spells, insomnia, you couldn't sleep. 16:57 You lost your appetite. 16:59 You were losing weight. 17:01 I was very concerned about, I would call you. 17:04 And when you texted me, I knew to call you immediately. 17:06 Did you ever have any thoughts of suicide? 17:09 Absolutely. 17:11 Let's talk about that? 17:12 Absolutely. 17:13 Not just one or two thoughts. 17:15 Uh, I've had attempts. 17:17 I had attempts to where it got bad 17:20 to where I didn't want to be here at all. 17:24 I remember one incident, I pulled into a dark alley, 17:30 hoping that nobody seeing me and was going to do it there. 17:35 It just couldn't happen. 17:37 For some reason it just, it wouldn't happen. 17:40 Praise God. 17:42 It wouldn't happen. 17:44 And I went home. 17:45 Yes. 17:47 Two days later, I tried it again. 17:50 My brother, my little brother who came in 17:52 and stopped it that time. 17:55 We actually got into a whole physical fight, like, 18:01 This is your little brother? 18:02 Yeah, my little brother, 18:03 we got into an actual physical fight 18:06 and he stopped it and he held me 18:11 for about two hours, wouldn't let me go. 18:13 Just like bear hug me, tied me. 18:15 I couldn't move. 18:17 He just, just sat there. 18:18 I never cried. 18:20 I just sat there. 18:21 But the thought, 18:22 the thought runs across your mind 18:24 and you don't know why it runs across your mind. 18:26 You didn't know what happened. 18:28 Some people act on it, some people don't. 18:32 Some people are lucky enough to have that conscience to say, 18:36 what are you doing? 18:38 Why are you doing this? 18:40 You have too many people looking for you. 18:42 You have too many people that you can help 18:45 go through this situation that you're going through. 18:49 But at the time you really don't know what to do. 18:53 I think that people are blessed. 18:55 I don't believe in luck. 18:57 I believe in, you know, the Holy Spirit stepping in, 19:01 guiding you, God stepped in in that alley. 19:03 Absolutely. 19:05 God stepped in with your brother, you know. 19:07 And I don't believe in coincidence. 19:09 I believe that God has a destined, 19:12 a destined time for each of us 19:14 and how He wants things done if we trust in Him. 19:17 True. 19:18 And put our hands in His hands. 19:20 I think that God has a purpose for your life, Darryl. 19:23 Well, I'm just learning that now 19:24 because yes, I'm a Christian, but at times 19:28 when you're going through depression, 19:30 you don't believe that. 19:32 You don't understand it. 19:33 You know, you feel like He's given up on you 19:36 or there's a block and it's like, 19:39 He not giving you no sign, no help, 19:42 no nothing to figure out how to get through this block. 19:46 And the block can be that big. 19:49 But because the depression is this big, 19:52 that block seems huge. 19:54 Huge. 19:55 So it was a while when me 20:00 and the big G-O-D did not... 20:03 Communicate. At all. 20:04 And that's very real. 20:06 You know, we go through things where God, 20:08 we disconnect from God. 20:10 But see, the one thing is God never leaves us. 20:12 Absolutely. 20:14 He's, but He's a free will God. Yes. 20:15 He will be there waiting with arms open wide to say, 20:19 I'm ready for you. 20:20 Come on home. 20:21 Come home. 20:23 I remember the little girl in church. 20:24 We had this song, you know, come home, come home. 20:28 It was beautiful. 20:29 And uh, Pastor Marshall T. Kelly would, 20:32 see he was my pastor. 20:33 He would sing this song 20:34 and you just wanted to give your life to Christ. 20:36 And I did at a very early age. 20:38 He wants, He waits. 20:39 And, but He will not pressure just like coming to counseling 20:43 is something that has to be your choice. 20:46 You know, it has to be something you need. 20:47 I remember a story real quickly. 20:49 This man was on an island. 20:51 He was stranded. 20:52 He prayed to God. 20:53 God, please send help. 20:55 Well, God sent a boat. 20:57 He said that mm-mm. 20:59 God sent a raft, he said mm-mm. 21:01 God even sent a helicopter, but he was looking for a plane 21:04 and, he missed it. 21:06 God is there to protect us, to help us. 21:10 Yes, depression is real audience. 21:12 Very real. 21:13 But you, that is not the problem, Darryl, 21:15 it's how you would handle the problem. 21:18 I had to take you off work for a little while 21:21 to be able to really take a step back. 21:23 Has it helped you? 21:25 It definitely has been helping, 21:27 because work was a trigger at a certain point. 21:29 Yeah. 21:30 So being away from things 21:33 to really sit back and figure out your life, 21:37 because you know, growing up, 21:39 you really never get to figure out your life. 21:41 It's elementary, middle school, high school. 21:45 If you're lucky enough college, 21:47 after college you have to get a job 21:48 because you got student debts that you got to pay for. 21:51 So you never really get to really figure out 21:54 who you are. 21:55 Some people are lucky enough to go away to college, 21:58 to help them figure out. 21:59 Now I hear you use the word luck all the time. 22:01 Why do you use lucky or luck? 22:03 And now I don't know, I'm not saying 22:05 I'm not here to judge you. 22:06 This is a safe zone, but I use the word blessed 22:09 or I use the word, you know, unfortunate. 22:12 Why do you say luck? 22:14 Luck and blessed is the same thing to me. 22:16 It's just, luck just happens, it come out easier. 22:20 Okay. 22:21 But I believe in luck 22:23 and blessings are the same thing because... 22:24 Okay, go ahead. 22:26 Because things don't just happen 22:29 just to happen. 22:31 You believe that? 22:32 I absolutely believe that. 22:33 There was no way that I wasn't supposed to meet you. 22:38 Absolutely, no way. 22:39 So you believe that was luck 22:40 or you believe God led you to me through your coworker? 22:43 I believe God led me through my coworker to you, 22:47 which I call a blessing and lucky all at the same time. 22:49 Okay. 22:51 Because when I think of luck, I think of happiness. 22:55 When I think of blessings, I think of encouragement 22:58 in the path to push forward. 22:59 Okay. 23:00 So I can bind those two together. 23:02 Right. 23:03 I think it was a... I think it's something 23:04 that I was raised with as a Seventh-day Adventist. 23:07 And I hear a lot of my patients use the term luck 23:12 and I tend to correct them. 23:14 But what I've learned from you today 23:16 that, you know, God gives us free will spirit. 23:20 And as a clinician, I have grown. 23:22 One of my patients said to me one time, 23:24 Dr. Logan, if you could just listen, 23:26 you'll be a better therapist. 23:28 And she was a therapist, 23:30 that was the best advice she could have given me. 23:32 And my listening skills went from maybe, 23:34 you know, zero tolerance to a 100%. 23:38 But being able to listen to you and not being able to use 23:43 the word luck and to criticize a person 23:47 that could do damage to my therapy session. 23:49 Absolutely. 23:50 So let me ask you this. 23:52 In everything that you're going through, 23:55 you know, God has spared your life. 23:57 Your brother tackled you. 24:00 Here you are now. 24:02 What's the next level for you? 24:05 What do you want from God? 24:08 What are you asking God to do for you now? 24:10 Right now, understanding.., 24:11 Understanding. 24:13 On where my depression stems 24:15 from and the courage to understand it, 24:20 the courage to accept it and the wisdom to know 24:24 that I can stop it from happening. 24:29 Outside of the depression part, 24:32 I don't know, I'm still working on that. 24:34 You still working on that? 24:35 I'm still working on that. 24:36 He's guiding me through a couple of things. 24:39 Being off work has led me to some things 24:42 that I forgot about that I was passionate 24:44 about, which is being creative, 24:47 started wanting to work for myself, 24:50 getting back to computers, 24:53 getting back to actually playing basketball. 24:56 Really? 24:57 Learning that it's okay to say I need help. 25:02 Yes. 25:03 So having this time off work is definitely 25:06 given me a new fuel. 25:09 Not saying that that new fuel I'm like, 25:11 I'm ready to go back to work 25:13 because there's still more to do. 25:14 There's still a lot. 25:15 We have to do a lot more work. 25:17 There's still a lot more to do, because I just had, 25:18 I had a breakdown recently. 25:20 Yes, and you just recently told me about it. 25:22 And I just told you about that. 25:23 Yes, you did. 25:25 So just because a person looks sound, 25:29 even acts like everything is all right, 25:32 don't necessarily mean it. 25:33 You said a key word that 25:34 most people mainly African-Americans 25:38 don't do, listen. 25:40 You know, listen. 25:41 Well, I find that it's all people 25:42 because I have a huge range of all ethnic backgrounds, 25:46 but what I think we need to do, 25:47 I knew I wasn't listening and I was the clinician. 25:51 And so, but the Lord spoke through her 25:54 and she was a Christian, 25:56 and it helped me to make some changes. 25:59 So now when you, as you know, I said, 26:01 tell me about you because there's a story. 26:03 Absolutely. 26:04 And you told me once you were able to pull yourself together, 26:07 talk a little bit. 26:09 And then even now when we have sessions, 26:11 I noticed that you will break down, 26:13 but it's a lot less, 26:14 but it depends on the trigger itself. 26:17 Let's talk about your favorite scripture, Philippians 4:13. 26:20 Yes. 26:21 "I can do all things in Christ who strengthens me." 26:23 Why is that your favorite? 26:25 That night in alley. 26:27 That night in the alley? 26:29 That night in alley. 26:30 That's what I call it, that night in the alley. 26:33 Because I truly believe if it wasn't for Him, 26:37 I wouldn't be here. 26:39 And I feel, especially during this off work 26:44 being with you helped me realize like, 26:48 okay, He is there. 26:50 All I have to do is continue to believe. 26:52 Believe in God. 26:54 And one thing I have noticed is, 26:56 I don't have to get on my knees and pray. 26:58 I don't have to close my eyes. 26:59 I can be driving in the car 27:01 and just have a complete conversation. 27:02 Yes! 27:04 People think I'll be talking to myself, but I don't. 27:06 But it ain't necessarily all about how you pray. 27:12 You can talk to God like a regular, 27:14 like we're having a conversation right now. 27:15 That's right. 27:16 You can have that same conversation. 27:18 And out of nowhere, 27:20 you'll get some strength to do something 27:22 that you ain't think you were able to do. 27:23 That you haven't been able to do. 27:25 So that's definitely been my go-to, 27:30 especially as of late, 27:32 because like with the breakdown that I recently had, 27:36 He helped me get up off that couch. 27:37 Because I was on the couch for two days like I told you. 27:38 Yes, you did. 27:40 Didn't want to move. 27:41 Didn't want to eat and watching TV. 27:46 Well, TV was actually watching me. 27:47 Right. 27:49 And that scripture came out of nowhere. 27:51 I was like, okay, let's get up. 27:55 Well, listen, I know 27:56 that we all are going to have to get up. 27:58 I want to thank Darryl Davidson for coming on Live To Be Well 28:02 and being so transparent 28:04 about his relationship and counseling. 28:06 Continue to Live To Be Well, I'm Dr. Kim. 28:09 God bless. |
Revised 2021-07-01