Participants: Seth Yelorda (Host), Alfonzo Greene, Lorraine Alexis, Michael Kelley, Sabrina Etienne
Series Code: PC
Program Code: PC000004
|
00:31 Welcome to Pure Choices.
00:33 I'm so glad that you decided to join us 00:34 for another episode 00:36 where we're going to be dealing with another hot topic 00:37 but yet a very serious topic. 00:39 Now you know that if you've been with us all season long, 00:41 we've been dealing with our sexuality and our sex. 00:44 And how God created us, 00:45 and how we can strive to make pure choices. 00:47 Today, we're going to have 00:49 a continuation of a previous episode, 00:51 part two actually, of episode 00:52 where we dealt with homosexuality. 00:54 But before we get into this topic, 00:55 I want to just take a moment 00:57 and just introduce you again to my colleagues 00:59 and a very special guest that we have with us today. 01:01 We have again here with us, 01:03 my brother Pastor Alfonzo Greene 01:05 who is at First SDA Church in Huntsville, Alabama. 01:08 And then we have a special guest, 01:09 we may be hearing more from her, 01:11 Ms Lorraine Alexis who comes to us from Nashville, 01:15 Tennessee. 01:16 And she is a second year medical student 01:18 there in Nashville. 01:19 We have with us again and we're glad she's here, 01:21 Miss Sabrina Etienne who as well is a student 01:24 at Southern Adventist University in Collegedale, 01:26 Tennessee area 01:28 and she's getting her master's in clinical counseling. 01:30 And then we have my brother Pastor Michael B. Kelly 01:34 who comes to us all the way from Riverside, California 01:37 from the Mt. Rubidoux SDA church. 01:39 And I am your host Pastor Seth Yelorda. 01:42 And I'm glad to be here. 01:43 Today, we want to continue 01:45 with where we left off last week 01:47 with homosexuality. 01:48 And I just want to take a moment, 01:49 just to kind of recap for those of our viewers 01:51 who are here for the first time 01:53 and they didn't catch last week. 01:54 Last week, we talked about homosexuality. 01:56 I know, specifically we dealt with, 01:58 is it right or is it wrong, 01:59 you know, where does the Bible stand with it. 02:03 What does society say about homosexuality, 02:06 what are some other areas that we deal with last week 02:08 when we talked about homosexuality? 02:10 Yeah, I think one of the main was we found 02:12 which connected to another topic 02:13 when we discussed the idea 02:15 of how the media plays a part in sexuality. 02:17 And we said, "Now we see it 02:18 being more prevalent on TV shows." 02:20 So now it's opposed to becoming something that's, 02:23 you know, abnormal or something like that or different. 02:26 Now becomes more than normal, more comfortable. 02:28 So it's more than comfortable environment. 02:30 Right, right. 02:31 Yeah, I mean and we also, you know, 02:32 just was talking about you know nature versus nurture 02:35 and just really kind... 02:36 If you're born this way versus... 02:37 If you're born this way versus... 02:39 Right, it just kind of really unpacked it, 02:40 you know, just try to impact that for the viewers. 02:44 And so, you know, this really just, 02:46 and it is trying to get some clear counsel 02:47 from the Word of God. 02:48 Yeah, now we know like homosexuality is prevalent. 02:51 I mean, it's becoming more and more prevalent. 02:53 I mean, not just in society 02:55 but in the church we're seeing it. 02:58 And today, we have a very special guest with us, 02:59 Lorraine Alexis. 03:01 And Lorraine has a very interesting story 03:03 about her own experience with homosexual lifestyles. 03:05 So I was going to turn it, Lorraine, just you know, 03:07 I thank you for being here. 03:08 And I thank you for you willing to be open and transparent. 03:11 I believe that someone's going to be blessed and healed, 03:14 they get victory from this episode. 03:16 And so just share with us, you know, briefly your story 03:18 where you've come from and where God has brought you. 03:21 I mean, wow, thank you so much. 03:24 When we talk about homosexuality, 03:25 it's such a big word. 03:27 And I think growing up, 03:28 I always associate homosexuality 03:30 with the psych thing 03:32 that you started to do something bad, 03:34 if something really bad happened to you, 03:36 people often equated it with after being molested, 03:40 or abused, or if your father wasn't in the home, 03:44 you know, you had to go through a really traumatic experience 03:46 to find yourself there. 03:47 And for me, that was quite the opposite. 03:49 I grew up in a Christian home, both parents in the home 03:53 who took us to church, who prayed with us, 03:56 who just loved on us. 03:58 Sabbath school, you name it, pathfinders, 03:59 also part of everything. 04:02 So on the outside, it wouldn't seem that 04:04 I would be a part of something like that. 04:06 There with you like there's no reason for you to... 04:08 There was no reason for it, right. 04:11 Even though the media gave its cues that sometimes, 04:14 you know, to make things easy or open, 04:17 you know, at first I still thought 04:19 it was not something for me. 04:21 And my experience began when I was 16. 04:23 I was in high school. 04:24 And my best friend, me and her became friends 04:28 through mutual sports that we played in school. 04:31 And we're really best friends 04:32 for maybe about two or three years before, 04:35 you know, during this process basically of what happened. 04:37 Was it a public school or Christian school? 04:38 This is a public school. 04:40 I went to public school all along. 04:42 And, you know, we were friends and at first, 04:45 nothing became of it. 04:46 You know, we were just really good friends, 04:47 went through a lot of things together. 04:49 And, you know, there came a point 04:50 where little by little, 04:52 the topic of experimentation started coming into play. 04:56 And at the time, you know, 04:57 it started to become like a little craze 04:58 that people would experiment, find things, 05:01 you know, I kissed a girl and I liked it. 05:03 And so when you saw the people doing things, 05:05 you know, we could do it too. 05:07 Let's just try. 05:08 And that was sort of the way she initiated certain things. 05:10 So let's just try, this is fun. 05:12 And of course, at first, it was, 05:15 you know, weird and I didn't want to be a part of it. 05:18 But little by little, just like anything 05:20 you start for the first time, you keep going. 05:23 You keep, "Oh, it means really... 05:25 It doesn't mean anything really." 05:26 You know, there wasn't labels or no names that we gave it, 05:30 but little by little, 05:31 it started become a lot more serious. 05:33 She started to develop feelings for me. 05:35 I didn't really know how to handle it, 05:37 she was my best friend, 05:38 I didn't want to let her down or disappoint her. 05:40 So I continued, I kept up. 05:43 And... 05:44 Can I ask a question? 05:46 This was your first experience sexually. 05:48 Was this her first experience? 05:50 I really didn't know. 05:51 As we were going through it, 05:53 I believe that it was the first time. 05:55 I mean, later on, you know, 05:56 she later disclosed to me 05:58 that she had been struggling with it for a long time, 06:00 but I never really knew. 06:02 But it was definitely my first time 06:05 even being a part of that. 06:06 So what happened as you continued to progress? 06:07 Yeah, little by little, we continued. 06:10 And the relationship actually started to develop, 06:12 we actually gave each other titles as girlfriend. 06:14 You became open at this point. Actually, no. 06:17 We kept this very private, no one really knew. 06:19 We had one friend that we really confided in 06:21 who kind of knew what was going on, 06:23 but we never told anyone. 06:25 Our parents never suspected anything, 06:27 if we would spend time together because we were best friends, 06:29 our parents expected us to spend time together 06:31 and hang out. 06:32 They had no problem with sleepovers 06:34 and not knowing where we were for days on ends 06:36 because they never thought or suspected 06:39 anything that was going on. 06:41 So it continued for months. 06:44 Yeah, I was just going to ask, 06:46 you know, one of the things Lorraine that, 06:48 you know, just kind of society you know, 06:50 pretty much people feel like 06:52 you know, if you're engaging in this type of relationship, 06:54 that there has to be some type of inclination, 06:58 were you like at any point before this 07:00 attracted to people of the same sex 07:03 or anything like that, 07:04 that's just kind of a common you know, 07:06 assumption that people make. 07:08 Was that true in your situation? 07:09 Absolutely not. 07:11 I never had an inclination prior to that experience. 07:14 Even while it was going on, I still have those moments. 07:17 I was like, "Ew, you know, what am I doing?" 07:20 But when you have someone there that you do care about, 07:22 you know, sometimes you kind of push those little feelings 07:25 to the side and say, 07:26 "It doesn't really mean anything. 07:27 I can try or I've already done this, 07:30 so I might as well keep going. 07:32 I might as well continue." 07:33 So you know, no. I didn't have an inclination. 07:36 It become monogamous friendship. 07:39 Just friendship. 07:40 It's amazing that it can start from there. 07:41 It just started as friendship and you know, at first, 07:44 it started out blazing, you know, experimentation. 07:47 It's cool, it's what's going on 07:48 and it became a lot more serious 07:50 as time progressed. 07:52 As you progress, you know, how did you come to victory, 07:55 like what was the process? 07:58 So I think like I said all along, you know, 08:01 I did have that feeling knowing that 08:03 I shouldn't be a part of this, 08:04 you know, I still went to church. 08:06 I still... 08:07 Sometimes, she would come to church with me 08:08 or you know, we still opened Sabbath as a family. 08:11 So my parents... 08:12 You know, she'd be around my family. 08:15 And it happened to take one day 08:16 where I happened to go to the Sabbath school. 08:18 And the Sabbath school teacher was talking about homosexuality 08:22 and how it was an abomination, 08:24 and within about three or four minutes 08:26 into the lesson, 08:27 I immediately felt this burning inside of me knowing that, 08:31 "Oh, my goodness!" 08:32 Like this is for me. 08:34 I cannot be a part of this, 08:36 and I literally ran out the church just in tears, 08:39 just crying, crying, crying in the car. 08:41 I was thinking to myself, "How did I get this far? 08:43 You know, months have gone by, almost a year has gone by, 08:47 "How did I get this far?" 08:48 And I remember that day, 08:50 you know, just really praying like, 08:51 "God, help me get out. 08:52 I'm going to get out, right now. 08:55 I'm out" And that day, I called my friend 08:56 and explained to her that, 08:59 you know, this could go on no longer 09:01 and it was devastating. 09:04 Let me ask this. 09:05 When you were going through the relationship, 09:07 and was still going back and forth to church and around, 09:10 you know, other church people and things like that. 09:13 I know you said you felt like something wasn't right. 09:17 Did you not feel comfortable to confide in somebody else 09:19 because of the way you heard maybe other people 09:21 responding to individuals who were in the same situation, 09:25 like because you said there's one friend you confided, 09:27 and I'm wondering, was that friend somebody 09:30 who was trying to help you out or, 09:31 you know, was there... 09:33 were you not comfortable because of the way 09:34 maybe you felt like you would have been received 09:36 if someone knew what you were going through? 09:37 Right, first off, the friend was not a friend 09:40 who was part of the church. 09:41 So I think at times, 09:43 actually encouraged the relationship to continue. 09:46 So they didn't really enforce or suggest 09:49 that maybe you should stop. 09:51 If I was feeling any way, 09:52 you know, they would sort of say, 09:54 "Well, you feel like this today but tomorrow may change," 09:55 you know. 09:57 We like the two of you together or something like that. 10:00 At the time, I really would never 10:02 have thought of coming out in the church 10:04 because A, I had not admitted it to myself 10:07 that I was a part of this. 10:08 Why should I say something, you know, inside the church? 10:11 Then I would be forever labeled as being a part of this 10:14 and that's not something I was ready to do. 10:17 I had not admitted it to myself. 10:19 And I could see how the church, 10:20 even just society views people that are part of this. 10:24 You know, they're unclean, and dirty, 10:26 and they're almost contagious by all means. 10:29 Stay away. Stay away. 10:31 So why would I tell the people in my church, 10:33 you know, who already carry those views. 10:35 And so most people that I actually do feel were family, 10:37 you know, I didn't want them to see me any different. 10:39 I didn't want them to look at me as though, 10:42 you know, I wasn't the same anymore. 10:43 You said something that really sparked question for me. 10:48 You said you did admit to yourself 10:50 almost like you had a hard time with it. 10:51 Can you unpack that, that sounds real powerful like 10:53 you're in something 10:55 but you said I couldn't admit it to myself, 10:57 therefore, I didn't get, you know, 10:59 maybe some extra help. 11:00 Can you unpack that maybe? Yeah, absolutely. 11:01 I mean, you're doing something, and you being something, 11:05 that's two different things, you know. 11:07 I can take something from a store 11:09 but I may not be a stealer. 11:11 I mean, I don't want to be called somebody who steals. 11:14 So it's easy to do one task and do the next task, 11:17 and go to this place 11:19 and hold hands with this person. 11:20 But if now all of a sudden, you give me a title 11:23 that means that I'm associated with all these other people 11:25 that I don't want to associate with, 11:28 or I don't feel they share the same characteristics 11:30 as I do, it's very difficult. 11:32 You know, that's similar to what we see taking place 11:35 in society where you have especially men who will say, 11:39 "I'm not homosexual, I just like sleeping with other men." 11:42 You know, it's like that whole down low epidemic 11:44 that's taking place. 11:45 You know, so they compartmentalize, 11:46 "No, I'm not homosexual, I just like to sleep with men, 11:49 but I'm not homosexual." 11:50 One thing I think that's powerful though, 11:52 Lorraine, that you shared 11:53 though is I think it was the realization 11:54 when she went to that Sabbath school class that day, 11:57 like where you were trying to compartmentalize 12:00 these two different things. 12:01 It's kind of when you brought it together, 12:03 it was like, you know what? 12:04 "Man, the Lord is speaking to me about this." 12:08 Once you embrace that, because as you were denying it, 12:11 it still have power over you. 12:12 But once you embraced it, 12:14 then it opened the door for God 12:15 to come in and to actually begin the process 12:18 of deliverance in your life. 12:20 What did that process look like? 12:22 So you went to Sabbath school. 12:23 They told you, you heard 12:25 the Sabbath school teacher talking about it. 12:26 You went out, you called your friend, 12:27 you know, and your friend gave you some flak. 12:29 From there, I mean, was it just like cut and dry, 12:32 it was over, you're done? 12:34 Did you cut the friend off, like what was the...? 12:35 Not at all. 12:37 Like I said, this was the beginning of sorrow for me. 12:40 And my friend, you know, she was just so hurt 12:42 and so upset that I had decided this. 12:44 You know, she cursed the church from left to right, 12:47 you know, told me I was foolish and crazy. 12:49 All of a sudden, I was being brainwashed. 12:52 Why can't I listen anymore? 12:54 She became depressed, I became depressed. 12:57 It was just a cycle of abuse, of threatening, of you know, 13:00 almost attempted suicide at one point. 13:02 She, you know, she threatened me 13:04 that if I would not change, that she would kill herself. 13:06 And that took, you know, a really big toll on me, 13:09 and actually put me in a moment of remission 13:11 where I started to say, "Okay, I'm sorry." 13:13 Like I didn't mean that, 13:14 you know, we can go back to how things would work. 13:16 Kind of relapse. 13:18 I mean, it took several months for me 13:19 even just to come back and say, "Okay, no. 13:21 I really have to go back to this. 13:23 You know, I don't know what's going to happen 13:25 but I know that I can't stay here." 13:28 And, you know, I had an opportunity 13:29 to be baptized shortly after. 13:31 And for me that was like a great big step saying, 13:34 "I'm not going back to this. 13:35 You know, this is over for me." 13:37 And that did not change for my friend. 13:39 You know that was just a symbol, 13:40 it meant nothing to her. 13:42 She was still trying to convince me 13:43 that I need to come back. 13:44 I need to do this again. 13:46 And, you know, she was just so motional about it 13:49 and it brought my motions down in... 13:51 Like I said, she was my best friend. 13:52 So I didn't know how to handle it. 13:54 I didn't want to lose her friendship. 13:55 So it was a very tough time for me. 13:57 And I think afterward, 13:59 it really impacted me in ways I really had not understood. 14:03 I had a lot of issues with self image and worth, 14:07 you know, if I was unclean, you know, 14:09 our church puts a nice big veil over 14:11 how young women should be and I was like, 14:13 "Man, I'm not that girl anymore. 14:15 How, you know, will someone love me?" Wow. 14:19 And also a struggle about 14:21 who I really was like did I always like women? 14:24 Did I... 14:25 Was this something I was naturally inclined to do, 14:27 you know. 14:28 So there was that confusion there. 14:30 Extreme confusion 14:31 and who do you talk about this with, 14:33 you know, you're 16 years old, 14:34 you're like how do I discuss it with someone 14:37 and them not automatically judge me 14:39 from that point forward. 14:41 I'm really trying to figure this out, 14:43 so it was very difficult. 14:44 Why not just look to the Bible? 14:46 I mean, why not just open the word and I mean, 14:48 clearly spells everything out there for us 14:50 and take your cues from that? 14:53 I mean, to be honest I'm not quite sure 14:55 why I didn't go to the Bible at that point, 14:57 but I feel what you need more at that point 14:59 is something relevant in your face. 15:00 You need someone 15:02 that just tell you that I love you, 15:03 like it's going to be okay, 15:04 like the Holy Spirit really led me 15:06 on a process of growth and conversion 15:09 to see God's plan for me. 15:10 But at that point I just needed someone to tell me 15:13 it's going to be okay, you know, like... 15:14 Some spiritual community. 15:16 Some spiritual community to be like, 15:17 it's going to be okay, 15:18 like your friend, she's going to be okay, 15:20 You know, she's not going to kill herself 15:21 or we're going to support her too, 15:23 we're going to support whatever you really need right now 15:25 we're going to support you right now. 15:26 You mentioned earlier 15:28 when we were before taping that. 15:30 You kept hearing a voice saying to you 15:31 that this is not you or something along those sorts 15:34 and that's what kind of always put you uneasy 15:37 with the decisions 15:39 that you're making in your homosexual lifestyle. 15:41 Now let me ask you a question, 15:42 I don't want to take us too far left field. 15:44 When you think about those 15:45 who are engaging in homosexuality 15:46 or in the process of it, 15:48 they may be having thoughts about it. 15:49 Do you think many of them right now the uneasiness 15:52 that they're feeling maybe their moral compass 15:54 speaking to them and letting them know 15:56 this is not who they truly are. 15:58 I think it's a little bit of everything. 15:59 I think one, it's society around you saying 16:02 it's not right, 16:04 then there's a little voice inside you saying, 16:06 you know, I'm not you... 16:08 this is strange, this is foreign. 16:10 Not normal, right. 16:11 This is not normal 16:12 and then there's that other part of you 16:14 that wants to defy, 16:15 you know, a little rebellious you know at that age 16:17 or even at any age 16:18 where you know you want to be part of 16:21 whatever it is that you admire or you want to be happy, 16:25 you're loved and the people that are giving that to 16:28 and the environment that you're finding that 16:29 then you're going to want to stay in 16:31 and that's natural for anyone. 16:32 So, you know, I think it's like a personal discovery 16:36 like God really impressed on my heart 16:38 that this was not for me. 16:39 Because I just think that society does cause 16:43 those who are feeling and contemplating homosexuality 16:46 to feel like they can't come out, 16:47 however in your case particular 16:49 you said that you kept feeling uneasiness about it 16:52 and I guess what I'm saying is that, 16:54 what I'm thinking about is that for those 16:56 who are feeling that same feeling that you had, 16:58 maybe if they would begin to investigate 17:00 and explore it now, 17:02 they wouldn't delve into the homosexuality 17:05 and things like that and begin to live that lifestyle out 17:07 if they begin to investigate and just kind of nip it 17:09 at the root cause of what they're feeling now. 17:12 I think that would be important if you had someone 17:14 that you can confide in or you felt an environment 17:16 where you can sort of talk it out 17:19 and actually hear it. 17:20 Sometimes after I spoke it out loud, 17:23 this is what I was doing, this is what I was a part of. 17:25 I really started to say, wait a second, 17:26 this was not, you know, I start to put the dots together 17:30 and see what made me start doing this? 17:32 Was this something I was doing all along? No. 17:34 Was it this person that I started doing, 17:36 did I feel, was I manipulated perhaps, 17:40 and I do think that's an important point, 17:42 you know, when you start to feel uneasy 17:43 and you know I believe that's the Holy Spirit 17:45 really tapping on you saying something is off. 17:48 You know, but I do want to say something about those feelings, 17:50 just, you know, I think those are very important, 17:53 the Holy Spirit does of course use those. 17:55 Sometimes though our feelings can deceive us in a sense 17:58 because it could be someone out there 17:59 who's engage in that and not feeling that... 18:00 Right. 18:02 And so they need to understand even though you're not feeling 18:04 that this is wrong or inappropriate, 18:07 there's some principles you have to look at to say, 18:09 okay, if I'm not feeling right 18:11 but what is the principle in standing there. 18:14 I think that's a blessing 18:15 that you are able get the feeling. 18:16 I know some folk, they just don't feel it 18:18 and that's what sometimes they wait for, 18:19 they wait for the feeling to kick in, 18:22 they know that it's all wrong, but it never comes, 18:24 I think sometimes feelings of conviction, 18:26 I mean, convictions don't always come 18:27 in the form I think always a feeling. 18:30 Sometimes it's seen something 18:32 and just becoming aware in a different sense. 18:36 I think something else to add on to that as far 18:37 as what has kind of helped to, 18:40 you know, the Lord to have the room to work 18:42 in the situation is just the emphasis 18:44 on the type of environment. 18:46 And I know that some of our churches 18:48 or some churches or some situations 18:50 are not conducive to be able to be honest 18:53 and open about the real struggles 18:55 but that's I think the vision for all of our church, 18:58 but I think that's even the vision 19:00 for this pure choices 19:01 because what we want is to create a dialogue 19:04 even on the internet and whatever 19:05 where you can really share what you're dealing with, 19:08 what you're going through and that's part of the process 19:10 of getting that deliverance. 19:11 And getting that spiritual community 19:13 even if it's online. 19:14 Even if it's online. 19:16 And I also think, you know, 19:17 we have to stop compartmentalizing sin, 19:18 you know, we have to stop 19:20 making one sin bigger than the other 19:21 or one sin more evil than the other. 19:23 It is, it is all sin and God really have to show me 19:26 that you know the person who lies, 19:28 they're just like you, you know, you made a mistake, 19:30 you've sinned, you went against me, 19:32 but I can restore you, I can make you better, 19:34 I can make you new. 19:35 There's nothing He can't bring you back from. 19:37 There's nothing He can't bring you back from, you know... 19:38 So I mean they say hindsight 19:40 is twenty-twenty looking back into the situation 19:43 I mean, what do you think the church could do, 19:45 you know, A, and then what do you think 19:47 that individual who is in that situation needs to do. 19:49 Right. You know. 19:51 Definitely a church has to show more love towards openness, 19:55 so that people can come forth. 19:57 It doesn't matter what it is, you know, I think... 19:59 Whether it's homosexuality or immorality or whatever. 20:00 Whether it's homosexuality, immorality, whatever it is, 20:04 even if it's just one specific incident 20:05 or event that happened 20:07 and you're not quite sure how to deal with it, 20:09 there should be an outlet or a venue 20:11 where you can sort of share this 20:12 and unpacked it without any kind of judgment, 20:15 you know, where you can even just talk it out, 20:17 and I think that's really important. 20:20 For people who are going through this, 20:21 you know, you're not worthless, 20:25 you're not, you know, there will be life after this. 20:27 God can really show you happiness 20:29 that you have not yet experienced. 20:30 And I think what kept me there for a long time 20:33 or it kept my mind, 20:34 you know, really reeling from all of it was that, okay, 20:37 I had some sort of happiness there but it wasn't real. 20:40 It didn't fit into the real life 20:42 that I really had. 20:44 It was this little glimpse in the secret place 20:46 that really wasn't what life was about. 20:48 It wasn't what God had wanted from me 20:51 and you know hindsight 20:52 I'm seeing how God has brought me out 20:55 and seeing what He's done for me 20:56 is tremendous and I could have never seen 20:57 that in my little home 20:59 and what I thought would make me happy. 21:01 So you know, to trust God and it's not going to be easy. 21:04 You know, there are going to be people 21:05 who are going to look at you different, 21:06 who are going to find you funny but God is able. 21:09 You know, well, I was gonna just ask, Lorriane, 21:11 you know, one of the things that you know 21:13 where I first heard you share this was at a Bible conference. 21:16 I don't know if that, was that the first time 21:17 you've shared it? 21:19 That was the first time I shared 21:20 that with a larger group of people. 21:22 I've shared it one on one with people 21:23 that I know were going through some of the struggles. 21:24 What was it about that environment 21:27 because we talk about really trying to, 21:30 you know, create an environment 21:32 where people can actually be open and share. 21:34 What was it about that Bible conference 21:36 that kind of allowed you to be 21:37 able to feel comfortable to share? 21:39 I mean the Holy Spirit was there, 21:41 I have to say that. 21:43 And it started over more people just started sharing, 21:45 you know, it started even little by little, 21:47 "Man, you know, 21:48 I'm in a relationship with a guy 21:49 and we're doing things that we really shouldn't be doing," 21:51 and then or, "Man, you know, God really brought me 21:54 out of the situation," 21:55 you know and I really felt the Holy Spirit nudging on me 21:58 that you need to share this. 22:00 Many people shared their testimonies 22:01 and it seemed like people were getting healing 22:03 and so yet I didn't really feel like I needed healing. 22:05 I actually thought that I was healed. 22:06 I actually thought that I was fine, 22:08 but that voice was saying 22:10 you need to speak and out of obedience, 22:12 out of just listening to the voice of God 22:14 I just shared, you know, I just shared, 22:16 this is my story, this is what I went. 22:18 You know, I didn't need any sort of healing 22:19 but I need to share. 22:21 And I realized that through me just being obedient, 22:25 it was someone else's cue for healing. 22:27 It was someone else's door to say, 22:30 okay, I can, I can move past 22:32 this if I'm struggling with the same thing 22:33 or I can share my testimony that's something different, 22:36 you know, how God has blessed me 22:37 and even if I'm still in it, 22:39 He's going to get me out of it and I believe 22:41 that He's going to get me out of it. 22:42 You know, I want to ask when you came to that point 22:46 where you are, you know, enough is enough going back 22:48 just a little bit and you told your friend 22:51 even the second time, hey, I'm away from that. 22:53 Were you able to continue your friendship, you know? 22:58 but I tried for so long to continue our friendship, 23:01 but it was impossible, it wasn't possible to do so. 23:04 And it's something I think 23:06 I still wrestle with to this day 23:08 is that, that friendship was never the same. 23:11 Then I blame myself a lot, 23:12 you know, our church is big on evangelism, 23:14 almost like we are individual evangelizers, 23:17 you know, we have to bring people to Christ, 23:19 and I kept feeling like it was my role 23:21 but I was not strong enough at that point... 23:23 To bring her. To bring her back. 23:24 I needed God to work on me. 23:27 And you know, I pray for her all the time 23:29 that God would just work on her heart 23:31 and even help her to forgive me, forgive me for, 23:35 you know, the hurt that I've caused 23:36 or the pain that I caused her while I was still confused. 23:40 So there was a point though 23:41 because I think it's important for, 23:43 you know, the listeners to know that sometimes 23:46 we have to separate ourselves... 23:48 Absolutely. 23:49 I mean the Bible says that, it's like Amos 3:3, 23:51 "Can two walk together, unless they be agreed?" 23:54 You know so... 23:55 Somebody else's role now 23:57 to help bring that person to Christ. 23:58 Right. Right. 23:59 And I just think it's probably because it's the idea of... 24:02 Again we never show pure choices, you... 24:04 In order for you to make those other choices, 24:06 you had to make a very difficult choice 24:08 that obviously still today bothers you 24:10 but you knew had to be done, 24:12 it wasn't easy in order for you to be where you are today. 24:15 I mean I was the only Christian representation 24:17 in that person's life and that made it very hard 24:19 for me to walk away 24:20 'cause I kept thinking like, what if she's not saved, 24:22 you know, like I want her to be in heaven too 24:24 and how could I walk away and leave her, 24:27 but God actually showed me like you can do this, 24:31 we're going to get to a place that's better than this. 24:33 And I didn't see that at first, 24:35 I fought it for a very long time 24:36 but, you know, looking back and I can definitely see 24:38 that's where God has brought me to. 24:39 Lorriane, how is life now for you? 24:42 It's good. 24:44 You know, I've really seen how God has brought me through, 24:47 has given me a new self image 24:49 and, you know, I'm not so concerned, 24:51 I have no secrets and that's like a great feeling 24:53 to know that God has blessed me and He's going to use me 24:56 and it's not easy, you know, I still sometimes get scared 24:59 about being associated with this or with that, 25:02 but I want to be in heaven so. 25:04 You know, I firmly believe 25:06 you have nothing to be ashamed of 25:07 but you've got a victory over. 25:08 Amen. Absolutely. 25:10 You know, God gives you victory, 25:11 listen, I am not ashamed, you know, this is who I was, 25:13 this is where I was and God, He restores. 25:16 The Bible clearly says, He makes all things beautiful 25:18 in His time. 25:20 So though I might have made some mistakes and messed up. 25:22 If I just place my hands in the hands of Master. 25:23 If I place my life in the hands of Master, He will make me, 25:26 you know, into His image in time. 25:27 And I think that's perfect to understand 25:29 because God will send people to love you 25:32 in spite of all of that. 25:33 And I think for a long time I believe that 25:34 no one would love me because of it 25:36 and people know and loved me anyway. 25:38 And that's like a beautiful thing, 25:40 they know exactly what I've done 25:41 and they loved me anyway because I'm not the same. 25:43 So if you could in the last few moments 25:46 we have somebody's in your situation right now 25:48 or something similar whether it's been 25:50 because they pulled in, 25:51 may be some other things had happened, 25:52 they've just experiment making a choice, 25:54 what's their, what's their first step, 25:55 what do they do to make sure 25:57 they don't get caught up in more of a cycle 26:00 so it becomes increasingly difficult to get out. 26:01 Definitely pray and ask God for some peace. 26:05 I think separating yourself from the situation 26:07 even temporarily, you know, to get that little window, 26:09 so the Holy Spirit can really speak to you 26:12 is really imperative. 26:13 I think I needed that little break of time, 26:15 and I think God will really, He will really show you 26:19 what you need to do next. 26:20 I think more importantly, I want to speak to those 26:22 that are around those people. 26:23 Sometimes, you know, I've seen people 26:25 who suspect that certain things are going on, 26:27 don't talk about those people. 26:28 You know, really just encourage them 26:30 and love on them as God really works through them 26:32 because everybody's moment 26:34 with the Holy Spirit is different 26:36 and they've got to get there on their own. 26:38 You know, that reminds me, I think I said it last week 26:41 when we were talking about this that 26:43 the church's response should be one of the God judges, 26:46 the Holy Spirit convicts and the church loves, you know. 26:50 And if the church would just do that just love, you know, 26:52 regardless of what your issue, your sin, your stumble, 26:55 your mistake, you know, we love you 26:57 and we're going to love you back into Christ, you know. 27:00 And a lot of times unfortunately we look at love 27:02 as though I accept everything you do. 27:04 Right. 27:05 And love is not I accept everything you do. 27:07 No, I mean love is, I see you in spite of what you do. 27:12 I see you as God sees you and God sees you as a child, 27:14 you know. 27:16 He sees you as what you are to become. 27:17 Right. I thank you for being here. 27:19 You know, I pray God for how He has delivered you 27:21 and I know that through your testimony 27:22 He will deliver others. 27:24 Praise God. 27:25 We pray that you are blessed today. 27:26 We want you to follow us on Facebook. 27:28 Go to Facebook, type in Pure Choices. 27:29 If you have a question for Lorriane, 27:31 we'll make sure she answers your questions 27:32 for more conversation and dialogue. 27:34 Listen, we'll see you next week, 27:35 be blessed and, you know, we just praise God for you. 27:39 Bye-bye. |
Revised 2017-08-28