Pure Choices

Homosexuality - Part 2

Three Angels Broadcasting Network

Program transcript

Participants: Seth Yelorda (Host), Alfonzo Greene, Lorraine Alexis, Michael Kelley, Sabrina Etienne


Series Code: PC

Program Code: PC000004

00:31 Welcome to Pure Choices.
00:33 I'm so glad that you decided to join us
00:34 for another episode
00:36 where we're going to be dealing with another hot topic
00:37 but yet a very serious topic.
00:39 Now you know that if you've been with us all season long,
00:41 we've been dealing with our sexuality and our sex.
00:44 And how God created us,
00:45 and how we can strive to make pure choices.
00:47 Today, we're going to have
00:49 a continuation of a previous episode,
00:51 part two actually, of episode
00:52 where we dealt with homosexuality.
00:54 But before we get into this topic,
00:55 I want to just take a moment
00:57 and just introduce you again to my colleagues
00:59 and a very special guest that we have with us today.
01:01 We have again here with us,
01:03 my brother Pastor Alfonzo Greene
01:05 who is at First SDA Church in Huntsville, Alabama.
01:08 And then we have a special guest,
01:09 we may be hearing more from her,
01:11 Ms Lorraine Alexis who comes to us from Nashville,
01:15 Tennessee.
01:16 And she is a second year medical student
01:18 there in Nashville.
01:19 We have with us again and we're glad she's here,
01:21 Miss Sabrina Etienne who as well is a student
01:24 at Southern Adventist University in Collegedale,
01:26 Tennessee area
01:28 and she's getting her master's in clinical counseling.
01:30 And then we have my brother Pastor Michael B. Kelly
01:34 who comes to us all the way from Riverside, California
01:37 from the Mt. Rubidoux SDA church.
01:39 And I am your host Pastor Seth Yelorda.
01:42 And I'm glad to be here.
01:43 Today, we want to continue
01:45 with where we left off last week
01:47 with homosexuality.
01:48 And I just want to take a moment,
01:49 just to kind of recap for those of our viewers
01:51 who are here for the first time
01:53 and they didn't catch last week.
01:54 Last week, we talked about homosexuality.
01:56 I know, specifically we dealt with,
01:58 is it right or is it wrong,
01:59 you know, where does the Bible stand with it.
02:03 What does society say about homosexuality,
02:06 what are some other areas that we deal with last week
02:08 when we talked about homosexuality?
02:10 Yeah, I think one of the main was we found
02:12 which connected to another topic
02:13 when we discussed the idea
02:15 of how the media plays a part in sexuality.
02:17 And we said, "Now we see it
02:18 being more prevalent on TV shows."
02:20 So now it's opposed to becoming something that's,
02:23 you know, abnormal or something like that or different.
02:26 Now becomes more than normal, more comfortable.
02:28 So it's more than comfortable environment.
02:30 Right, right.
02:31 Yeah, I mean and we also, you know,
02:32 just was talking about you know nature versus nurture
02:35 and just really kind...
02:36 If you're born this way versus...
02:37 If you're born this way versus...
02:39 Right, it just kind of really unpacked it,
02:40 you know, just try to impact that for the viewers.
02:44 And so, you know, this really just,
02:46 and it is trying to get some clear counsel
02:47 from the Word of God.
02:48 Yeah, now we know like homosexuality is prevalent.
02:51 I mean, it's becoming more and more prevalent.
02:53 I mean, not just in society
02:55 but in the church we're seeing it.
02:58 And today, we have a very special guest with us,
02:59 Lorraine Alexis.
03:01 And Lorraine has a very interesting story
03:03 about her own experience with homosexual lifestyles.
03:05 So I was going to turn it, Lorraine, just you know,
03:07 I thank you for being here.
03:08 And I thank you for you willing to be open and transparent.
03:11 I believe that someone's going to be blessed and healed,
03:14 they get victory from this episode.
03:16 And so just share with us, you know, briefly your story
03:18 where you've come from and where God has brought you.
03:21 I mean, wow, thank you so much.
03:24 When we talk about homosexuality,
03:25 it's such a big word.
03:27 And I think growing up,
03:28 I always associate homosexuality
03:30 with the psych thing
03:32 that you started to do something bad,
03:34 if something really bad happened to you,
03:36 people often equated it with after being molested,
03:40 or abused, or if your father wasn't in the home,
03:44 you know, you had to go through a really traumatic experience
03:46 to find yourself there.
03:47 And for me, that was quite the opposite.
03:49 I grew up in a Christian home, both parents in the home
03:53 who took us to church, who prayed with us,
03:56 who just loved on us.
03:58 Sabbath school, you name it, pathfinders,
03:59 also part of everything.
04:02 So on the outside, it wouldn't seem that
04:04 I would be a part of something like that.
04:06 There with you like there's no reason for you to...
04:08 There was no reason for it, right.
04:11 Even though the media gave its cues that sometimes,
04:14 you know, to make things easy or open,
04:17 you know, at first I still thought
04:19 it was not something for me.
04:21 And my experience began when I was 16.
04:23 I was in high school.
04:24 And my best friend, me and her became friends
04:28 through mutual sports that we played in school.
04:31 And we're really best friends
04:32 for maybe about two or three years before,
04:35 you know, during this process basically of what happened.
04:37 Was it a public school or Christian school?
04:38 This is a public school.
04:40 I went to public school all along.
04:42 And, you know, we were friends and at first,
04:45 nothing became of it.
04:46 You know, we were just really good friends,
04:47 went through a lot of things together.
04:49 And, you know, there came a point
04:50 where little by little,
04:52 the topic of experimentation started coming into play.
04:56 And at the time, you know,
04:57 it started to become like a little craze
04:58 that people would experiment, find things,
05:01 you know, I kissed a girl and I liked it.
05:03 And so when you saw the people doing things,
05:05 you know, we could do it too.
05:07 Let's just try.
05:08 And that was sort of the way she initiated certain things.
05:10 So let's just try, this is fun.
05:12 And of course, at first, it was,
05:15 you know, weird and I didn't want to be a part of it.
05:18 But little by little, just like anything
05:20 you start for the first time, you keep going.
05:23 You keep, "Oh, it means really...
05:25 It doesn't mean anything really."
05:26 You know, there wasn't labels or no names that we gave it,
05:30 but little by little,
05:31 it started become a lot more serious.
05:33 She started to develop feelings for me.
05:35 I didn't really know how to handle it,
05:37 she was my best friend,
05:38 I didn't want to let her down or disappoint her.
05:40 So I continued, I kept up.
05:43 And...
05:44 Can I ask a question?
05:46 This was your first experience sexually.
05:48 Was this her first experience?
05:50 I really didn't know.
05:51 As we were going through it,
05:53 I believe that it was the first time.
05:55 I mean, later on, you know,
05:56 she later disclosed to me
05:58 that she had been struggling with it for a long time,
06:00 but I never really knew.
06:02 But it was definitely my first time
06:05 even being a part of that.
06:06 So what happened as you continued to progress?
06:07 Yeah, little by little, we continued.
06:10 And the relationship actually started to develop,
06:12 we actually gave each other titles as girlfriend.
06:14 You became open at this point. Actually, no.
06:17 We kept this very private, no one really knew.
06:19 We had one friend that we really confided in
06:21 who kind of knew what was going on,
06:23 but we never told anyone.
06:25 Our parents never suspected anything,
06:27 if we would spend time together because we were best friends,
06:29 our parents expected us to spend time together
06:31 and hang out.
06:32 They had no problem with sleepovers
06:34 and not knowing where we were for days on ends
06:36 because they never thought or suspected
06:39 anything that was going on.
06:41 So it continued for months.
06:44 Yeah, I was just going to ask,
06:46 you know, one of the things Lorraine that,
06:48 you know, just kind of society you know,
06:50 pretty much people feel like
06:52 you know, if you're engaging in this type of relationship,
06:54 that there has to be some type of inclination,
06:58 were you like at any point before this
07:00 attracted to people of the same sex
07:03 or anything like that,
07:04 that's just kind of a common you know,
07:06 assumption that people make.
07:08 Was that true in your situation?
07:09 Absolutely not.
07:11 I never had an inclination prior to that experience.
07:14 Even while it was going on, I still have those moments.
07:17 I was like, "Ew, you know, what am I doing?"
07:20 But when you have someone there that you do care about,
07:22 you know, sometimes you kind of push those little feelings
07:25 to the side and say,
07:26 "It doesn't really mean anything.
07:27 I can try or I've already done this,
07:30 so I might as well keep going.
07:32 I might as well continue."
07:33 So you know, no. I didn't have an inclination.
07:36 It become monogamous friendship.
07:39 Just friendship.
07:40 It's amazing that it can start from there.
07:41 It just started as friendship and you know, at first,
07:44 it started out blazing, you know, experimentation.
07:47 It's cool, it's what's going on
07:48 and it became a lot more serious
07:50 as time progressed.
07:52 As you progress, you know, how did you come to victory,
07:55 like what was the process?
07:58 So I think like I said all along, you know,
08:01 I did have that feeling knowing that
08:03 I shouldn't be a part of this,
08:04 you know, I still went to church.
08:06 I still...
08:07 Sometimes, she would come to church with me
08:08 or you know, we still opened Sabbath as a family.
08:11 So my parents...
08:12 You know, she'd be around my family.
08:15 And it happened to take one day
08:16 where I happened to go to the Sabbath school.
08:18 And the Sabbath school teacher was talking about homosexuality
08:22 and how it was an abomination,
08:24 and within about three or four minutes
08:26 into the lesson,
08:27 I immediately felt this burning inside of me knowing that,
08:31 "Oh, my goodness!"
08:32 Like this is for me.
08:34 I cannot be a part of this,
08:36 and I literally ran out the church just in tears,
08:39 just crying, crying, crying in the car.
08:41 I was thinking to myself, "How did I get this far?
08:43 You know, months have gone by, almost a year has gone by,
08:47 "How did I get this far?"
08:48 And I remember that day,
08:50 you know, just really praying like,
08:51 "God, help me get out.
08:52 I'm going to get out, right now.
08:55 I'm out" And that day, I called my friend
08:56 and explained to her that,
08:59 you know, this could go on no longer
09:01 and it was devastating.
09:04 Let me ask this.
09:05 When you were going through the relationship,
09:07 and was still going back and forth to church and around,
09:10 you know, other church people and things like that.
09:13 I know you said you felt like something wasn't right.
09:17 Did you not feel comfortable to confide in somebody else
09:19 because of the way you heard maybe other people
09:21 responding to individuals who were in the same situation,
09:25 like because you said there's one friend you confided,
09:27 and I'm wondering, was that friend somebody
09:30 who was trying to help you out or,
09:31 you know, was there...
09:33 were you not comfortable because of the way
09:34 maybe you felt like you would have been received
09:36 if someone knew what you were going through?
09:37 Right, first off, the friend was not a friend
09:40 who was part of the church.
09:41 So I think at times,
09:43 actually encouraged the relationship to continue.
09:46 So they didn't really enforce or suggest
09:49 that maybe you should stop.
09:51 If I was feeling any way,
09:52 you know, they would sort of say,
09:54 "Well, you feel like this today but tomorrow may change,"
09:55 you know.
09:57 We like the two of you together or something like that.
10:00 At the time, I really would never
10:02 have thought of coming out in the church
10:04 because A, I had not admitted it to myself
10:07 that I was a part of this.
10:08 Why should I say something, you know, inside the church?
10:11 Then I would be forever labeled as being a part of this
10:14 and that's not something I was ready to do.
10:17 I had not admitted it to myself.
10:19 And I could see how the church,
10:20 even just society views people that are part of this.
10:24 You know, they're unclean, and dirty,
10:26 and they're almost contagious by all means.
10:29 Stay away. Stay away.
10:31 So why would I tell the people in my church,
10:33 you know, who already carry those views.
10:35 And so most people that I actually do feel were family,
10:37 you know, I didn't want them to see me any different.
10:39 I didn't want them to look at me as though,
10:42 you know, I wasn't the same anymore.
10:43 You said something that really sparked question for me.
10:48 You said you did admit to yourself
10:50 almost like you had a hard time with it.
10:51 Can you unpack that, that sounds real powerful like
10:53 you're in something
10:55 but you said I couldn't admit it to myself,
10:57 therefore, I didn't get, you know,
10:59 maybe some extra help.
11:00 Can you unpack that maybe? Yeah, absolutely.
11:01 I mean, you're doing something, and you being something,
11:05 that's two different things, you know.
11:07 I can take something from a store
11:09 but I may not be a stealer.
11:11 I mean, I don't want to be called somebody who steals.
11:14 So it's easy to do one task and do the next task,
11:17 and go to this place
11:19 and hold hands with this person.
11:20 But if now all of a sudden, you give me a title
11:23 that means that I'm associated with all these other people
11:25 that I don't want to associate with,
11:28 or I don't feel they share the same characteristics
11:30 as I do, it's very difficult.
11:32 You know, that's similar to what we see taking place
11:35 in society where you have especially men who will say,
11:39 "I'm not homosexual, I just like sleeping with other men."
11:42 You know, it's like that whole down low epidemic
11:44 that's taking place.
11:45 You know, so they compartmentalize,
11:46 "No, I'm not homosexual, I just like to sleep with men,
11:49 but I'm not homosexual."
11:50 One thing I think that's powerful though,
11:52 Lorraine, that you shared
11:53 though is I think it was the realization
11:54 when she went to that Sabbath school class that day,
11:57 like where you were trying to compartmentalize
12:00 these two different things.
12:01 It's kind of when you brought it together,
12:03 it was like, you know what?
12:04 "Man, the Lord is speaking to me about this."
12:08 Once you embrace that, because as you were denying it,
12:11 it still have power over you.
12:12 But once you embraced it,
12:14 then it opened the door for God
12:15 to come in and to actually begin the process
12:18 of deliverance in your life.
12:20 What did that process look like?
12:22 So you went to Sabbath school.
12:23 They told you, you heard
12:25 the Sabbath school teacher talking about it.
12:26 You went out, you called your friend,
12:27 you know, and your friend gave you some flak.
12:29 From there, I mean, was it just like cut and dry,
12:32 it was over, you're done?
12:34 Did you cut the friend off, like what was the...?
12:35 Not at all.
12:37 Like I said, this was the beginning of sorrow for me.
12:40 And my friend, you know, she was just so hurt
12:42 and so upset that I had decided this.
12:44 You know, she cursed the church from left to right,
12:47 you know, told me I was foolish and crazy.
12:49 All of a sudden, I was being brainwashed.
12:52 Why can't I listen anymore?
12:54 She became depressed, I became depressed.
12:57 It was just a cycle of abuse, of threatening, of you know,
13:00 almost attempted suicide at one point.
13:02 She, you know, she threatened me
13:04 that if I would not change, that she would kill herself.
13:06 And that took, you know, a really big toll on me,
13:09 and actually put me in a moment of remission
13:11 where I started to say, "Okay, I'm sorry."
13:13 Like I didn't mean that,
13:14 you know, we can go back to how things would work.
13:16 Kind of relapse.
13:18 I mean, it took several months for me
13:19 even just to come back and say, "Okay, no.
13:21 I really have to go back to this.
13:23 You know, I don't know what's going to happen
13:25 but I know that I can't stay here."
13:28 And, you know, I had an opportunity
13:29 to be baptized shortly after.
13:31 And for me that was like a great big step saying,
13:34 "I'm not going back to this.
13:35 You know, this is over for me."
13:37 And that did not change for my friend.
13:39 You know that was just a symbol,
13:40 it meant nothing to her.
13:42 She was still trying to convince me
13:43 that I need to come back.
13:44 I need to do this again.
13:46 And, you know, she was just so motional about it
13:49 and it brought my motions down in...
13:51 Like I said, she was my best friend.
13:52 So I didn't know how to handle it.
13:54 I didn't want to lose her friendship.
13:55 So it was a very tough time for me.
13:57 And I think afterward,
13:59 it really impacted me in ways I really had not understood.
14:03 I had a lot of issues with self image and worth,
14:07 you know, if I was unclean, you know,
14:09 our church puts a nice big veil over
14:11 how young women should be and I was like,
14:13 "Man, I'm not that girl anymore.
14:15 How, you know, will someone love me?" Wow.
14:19 And also a struggle about
14:21 who I really was like did I always like women?
14:24 Did I...
14:25 Was this something I was naturally inclined to do,
14:27 you know.
14:28 So there was that confusion there.
14:30 Extreme confusion
14:31 and who do you talk about this with,
14:33 you know, you're 16 years old,
14:34 you're like how do I discuss it with someone
14:37 and them not automatically judge me
14:39 from that point forward.
14:41 I'm really trying to figure this out,
14:43 so it was very difficult.
14:44 Why not just look to the Bible?
14:46 I mean, why not just open the word and I mean,
14:48 clearly spells everything out there for us
14:50 and take your cues from that?
14:53 I mean, to be honest I'm not quite sure
14:55 why I didn't go to the Bible at that point,
14:57 but I feel what you need more at that point
14:59 is something relevant in your face.
15:00 You need someone
15:02 that just tell you that I love you,
15:03 like it's going to be okay,
15:04 like the Holy Spirit really led me
15:06 on a process of growth and conversion
15:09 to see God's plan for me.
15:10 But at that point I just needed someone to tell me
15:13 it's going to be okay, you know, like...
15:14 Some spiritual community.
15:16 Some spiritual community to be like,
15:17 it's going to be okay,
15:18 like your friend, she's going to be okay,
15:20 You know, she's not going to kill herself
15:21 or we're going to support her too,
15:23 we're going to support whatever you really need right now
15:25 we're going to support you right now.
15:26 You mentioned earlier
15:28 when we were before taping that.
15:30 You kept hearing a voice saying to you
15:31 that this is not you or something along those sorts
15:34 and that's what kind of always put you uneasy
15:37 with the decisions
15:39 that you're making in your homosexual lifestyle.
15:41 Now let me ask you a question,
15:42 I don't want to take us too far left field.
15:44 When you think about those
15:45 who are engaging in homosexuality
15:46 or in the process of it,
15:48 they may be having thoughts about it.
15:49 Do you think many of them right now the uneasiness
15:52 that they're feeling maybe their moral compass
15:54 speaking to them and letting them know
15:56 this is not who they truly are.
15:58 I think it's a little bit of everything.
15:59 I think one, it's society around you saying
16:02 it's not right,
16:04 then there's a little voice inside you saying,
16:06 you know, I'm not you...
16:08 this is strange, this is foreign.
16:10 Not normal, right.
16:11 This is not normal
16:12 and then there's that other part of you
16:14 that wants to defy,
16:15 you know, a little rebellious you know at that age
16:17 or even at any age
16:18 where you know you want to be part of
16:21 whatever it is that you admire or you want to be happy,
16:25 you're loved and the people that are giving that to
16:28 and the environment that you're finding that
16:29 then you're going to want to stay in
16:31 and that's natural for anyone.
16:32 So, you know, I think it's like a personal discovery
16:36 like God really impressed on my heart
16:38 that this was not for me.
16:39 Because I just think that society does cause
16:43 those who are feeling and contemplating homosexuality
16:46 to feel like they can't come out,
16:47 however in your case particular
16:49 you said that you kept feeling uneasiness about it
16:52 and I guess what I'm saying is that,
16:54 what I'm thinking about is that for those
16:56 who are feeling that same feeling that you had,
16:58 maybe if they would begin to investigate
17:00 and explore it now,
17:02 they wouldn't delve into the homosexuality
17:05 and things like that and begin to live that lifestyle out
17:07 if they begin to investigate and just kind of nip it
17:09 at the root cause of what they're feeling now.
17:12 I think that would be important if you had someone
17:14 that you can confide in or you felt an environment
17:16 where you can sort of talk it out
17:19 and actually hear it.
17:20 Sometimes after I spoke it out loud,
17:23 this is what I was doing, this is what I was a part of.
17:25 I really started to say, wait a second,
17:26 this was not, you know, I start to put the dots together
17:30 and see what made me start doing this?
17:32 Was this something I was doing all along? No.
17:34 Was it this person that I started doing,
17:36 did I feel, was I manipulated perhaps,
17:40 and I do think that's an important point,
17:42 you know, when you start to feel uneasy
17:43 and you know I believe that's the Holy Spirit
17:45 really tapping on you saying something is off.
17:48 You know, but I do want to say something about those feelings,
17:50 just, you know, I think those are very important,
17:53 the Holy Spirit does of course use those.
17:55 Sometimes though our feelings can deceive us in a sense
17:58 because it could be someone out there
17:59 who's engage in that and not feeling that...
18:00 Right.
18:02 And so they need to understand even though you're not feeling
18:04 that this is wrong or inappropriate,
18:07 there's some principles you have to look at to say,
18:09 okay, if I'm not feeling right
18:11 but what is the principle in standing there.
18:14 I think that's a blessing
18:15 that you are able get the feeling.
18:16 I know some folk, they just don't feel it
18:18 and that's what sometimes they wait for,
18:19 they wait for the feeling to kick in,
18:22 they know that it's all wrong, but it never comes,
18:24 I think sometimes feelings of conviction,
18:26 I mean, convictions don't always come
18:27 in the form I think always a feeling.
18:30 Sometimes it's seen something
18:32 and just becoming aware in a different sense.
18:36 I think something else to add on to that as far
18:37 as what has kind of helped to,
18:40 you know, the Lord to have the room to work
18:42 in the situation is just the emphasis
18:44 on the type of environment.
18:46 And I know that some of our churches
18:48 or some churches or some situations
18:50 are not conducive to be able to be honest
18:53 and open about the real struggles
18:55 but that's I think the vision for all of our church,
18:58 but I think that's even the vision
19:00 for this pure choices
19:01 because what we want is to create a dialogue
19:04 even on the internet and whatever
19:05 where you can really share what you're dealing with,
19:08 what you're going through and that's part of the process
19:10 of getting that deliverance.
19:11 And getting that spiritual community
19:13 even if it's online.
19:14 Even if it's online.
19:16 And I also think, you know,
19:17 we have to stop compartmentalizing sin,
19:18 you know, we have to stop
19:20 making one sin bigger than the other
19:21 or one sin more evil than the other.
19:23 It is, it is all sin and God really have to show me
19:26 that you know the person who lies,
19:28 they're just like you, you know, you made a mistake,
19:30 you've sinned, you went against me,
19:32 but I can restore you, I can make you better,
19:34 I can make you new.
19:35 There's nothing He can't bring you back from.
19:37 There's nothing He can't bring you back from, you know...
19:38 So I mean they say hindsight
19:40 is twenty-twenty looking back into the situation
19:43 I mean, what do you think the church could do,
19:45 you know, A, and then what do you think
19:47 that individual who is in that situation needs to do.
19:49 Right. You know.
19:51 Definitely a church has to show more love towards openness,
19:55 so that people can come forth.
19:57 It doesn't matter what it is, you know, I think...
19:59 Whether it's homosexuality or immorality or whatever.
20:00 Whether it's homosexuality, immorality, whatever it is,
20:04 even if it's just one specific incident
20:05 or event that happened
20:07 and you're not quite sure how to deal with it,
20:09 there should be an outlet or a venue
20:11 where you can sort of share this
20:12 and unpacked it without any kind of judgment,
20:15 you know, where you can even just talk it out,
20:17 and I think that's really important.
20:20 For people who are going through this,
20:21 you know, you're not worthless,
20:25 you're not, you know, there will be life after this.
20:27 God can really show you happiness
20:29 that you have not yet experienced.
20:30 And I think what kept me there for a long time
20:33 or it kept my mind,
20:34 you know, really reeling from all of it was that, okay,
20:37 I had some sort of happiness there but it wasn't real.
20:40 It didn't fit into the real life
20:42 that I really had.
20:44 It was this little glimpse in the secret place
20:46 that really wasn't what life was about.
20:48 It wasn't what God had wanted from me
20:51 and you know hindsight
20:52 I'm seeing how God has brought me out
20:55 and seeing what He's done for me
20:56 is tremendous and I could have never seen
20:57 that in my little home
20:59 and what I thought would make me happy.
21:01 So you know, to trust God and it's not going to be easy.
21:04 You know, there are going to be people
21:05 who are going to look at you different,
21:06 who are going to find you funny but God is able.
21:09 You know, well, I was gonna just ask, Lorriane,
21:11 you know, one of the things that you know
21:13 where I first heard you share this was at a Bible conference.
21:16 I don't know if that, was that the first time
21:17 you've shared it?
21:19 That was the first time I shared
21:20 that with a larger group of people.
21:22 I've shared it one on one with people
21:23 that I know were going through some of the struggles.
21:24 What was it about that environment
21:27 because we talk about really trying to,
21:30 you know, create an environment
21:32 where people can actually be open and share.
21:34 What was it about that Bible conference
21:36 that kind of allowed you to be
21:37 able to feel comfortable to share?
21:39 I mean the Holy Spirit was there,
21:41 I have to say that.
21:43 And it started over more people just started sharing,
21:45 you know, it started even little by little,
21:47 "Man, you know,
21:48 I'm in a relationship with a guy
21:49 and we're doing things that we really shouldn't be doing,"
21:51 and then or, "Man, you know, God really brought me
21:54 out of the situation,"
21:55 you know and I really felt the Holy Spirit nudging on me
21:58 that you need to share this.
22:00 Many people shared their testimonies
22:01 and it seemed like people were getting healing
22:03 and so yet I didn't really feel like I needed healing.
22:05 I actually thought that I was healed.
22:06 I actually thought that I was fine,
22:08 but that voice was saying
22:10 you need to speak and out of obedience,
22:12 out of just listening to the voice of God
22:14 I just shared, you know, I just shared,
22:16 this is my story, this is what I went.
22:18 You know, I didn't need any sort of healing
22:19 but I need to share.
22:21 And I realized that through me just being obedient,
22:25 it was someone else's cue for healing.
22:27 It was someone else's door to say,
22:30 okay, I can, I can move past
22:32 this if I'm struggling with the same thing
22:33 or I can share my testimony that's something different,
22:36 you know, how God has blessed me
22:37 and even if I'm still in it,
22:39 He's going to get me out of it and I believe
22:41 that He's going to get me out of it.
22:42 You know, I want to ask when you came to that point
22:46 where you are, you know, enough is enough going back
22:48 just a little bit and you told your friend
22:51 even the second time, hey, I'm away from that.
22:53 Were you able to continue your friendship, you know?
22:58 but I tried for so long to continue our friendship,
23:01 but it was impossible, it wasn't possible to do so.
23:04 And it's something I think
23:06 I still wrestle with to this day
23:08 is that, that friendship was never the same.
23:11 Then I blame myself a lot,
23:12 you know, our church is big on evangelism,
23:14 almost like we are individual evangelizers,
23:17 you know, we have to bring people to Christ,
23:19 and I kept feeling like it was my role
23:21 but I was not strong enough at that point...
23:23 To bring her. To bring her back.
23:24 I needed God to work on me.
23:27 And you know, I pray for her all the time
23:29 that God would just work on her heart
23:31 and even help her to forgive me, forgive me for,
23:35 you know, the hurt that I've caused
23:36 or the pain that I caused her while I was still confused.
23:40 So there was a point though
23:41 because I think it's important for,
23:43 you know, the listeners to know that sometimes
23:46 we have to separate ourselves...
23:48 Absolutely.
23:49 I mean the Bible says that, it's like Amos 3:3,
23:51 "Can two walk together, unless they be agreed?"
23:54 You know so...
23:55 Somebody else's role now
23:57 to help bring that person to Christ.
23:58 Right. Right.
23:59 And I just think it's probably because it's the idea of...
24:02 Again we never show pure choices, you...
24:04 In order for you to make those other choices,
24:06 you had to make a very difficult choice
24:08 that obviously still today bothers you
24:10 but you knew had to be done,
24:12 it wasn't easy in order for you to be where you are today.
24:15 I mean I was the only Christian representation
24:17 in that person's life and that made it very hard
24:19 for me to walk away
24:20 'cause I kept thinking like, what if she's not saved,
24:22 you know, like I want her to be in heaven too
24:24 and how could I walk away and leave her,
24:27 but God actually showed me like you can do this,
24:31 we're going to get to a place that's better than this.
24:33 And I didn't see that at first,
24:35 I fought it for a very long time
24:36 but, you know, looking back and I can definitely see
24:38 that's where God has brought me to.
24:39 Lorriane, how is life now for you?
24:42 It's good.
24:44 You know, I've really seen how God has brought me through,
24:47 has given me a new self image
24:49 and, you know, I'm not so concerned,
24:51 I have no secrets and that's like a great feeling
24:53 to know that God has blessed me and He's going to use me
24:56 and it's not easy, you know, I still sometimes get scared
24:59 about being associated with this or with that,
25:02 but I want to be in heaven so.
25:04 You know, I firmly believe
25:06 you have nothing to be ashamed of
25:07 but you've got a victory over.
25:08 Amen. Absolutely.
25:10 You know, God gives you victory,
25:11 listen, I am not ashamed, you know, this is who I was,
25:13 this is where I was and God, He restores.
25:16 The Bible clearly says, He makes all things beautiful
25:18 in His time.
25:20 So though I might have made some mistakes and messed up.
25:22 If I just place my hands in the hands of Master.
25:23 If I place my life in the hands of Master, He will make me,
25:26 you know, into His image in time.
25:27 And I think that's perfect to understand
25:29 because God will send people to love you
25:32 in spite of all of that.
25:33 And I think for a long time I believe that
25:34 no one would love me because of it
25:36 and people know and loved me anyway.
25:38 And that's like a beautiful thing,
25:40 they know exactly what I've done
25:41 and they loved me anyway because I'm not the same.
25:43 So if you could in the last few moments
25:46 we have somebody's in your situation right now
25:48 or something similar whether it's been
25:50 because they pulled in,
25:51 may be some other things had happened,
25:52 they've just experiment making a choice,
25:54 what's their, what's their first step,
25:55 what do they do to make sure
25:57 they don't get caught up in more of a cycle
26:00 so it becomes increasingly difficult to get out.
26:01 Definitely pray and ask God for some peace.
26:05 I think separating yourself from the situation
26:07 even temporarily, you know, to get that little window,
26:09 so the Holy Spirit can really speak to you
26:12 is really imperative.
26:13 I think I needed that little break of time,
26:15 and I think God will really, He will really show you
26:19 what you need to do next.
26:20 I think more importantly, I want to speak to those
26:22 that are around those people.
26:23 Sometimes, you know, I've seen people
26:25 who suspect that certain things are going on,
26:27 don't talk about those people.
26:28 You know, really just encourage them
26:30 and love on them as God really works through them
26:32 because everybody's moment
26:34 with the Holy Spirit is different
26:36 and they've got to get there on their own.
26:38 You know, that reminds me, I think I said it last week
26:41 when we were talking about this that
26:43 the church's response should be one of the God judges,
26:46 the Holy Spirit convicts and the church loves, you know.
26:50 And if the church would just do that just love, you know,
26:52 regardless of what your issue, your sin, your stumble,
26:55 your mistake, you know, we love you
26:57 and we're going to love you back into Christ, you know.
27:00 And a lot of times unfortunately we look at love
27:02 as though I accept everything you do.
27:04 Right.
27:05 And love is not I accept everything you do.
27:07 No, I mean love is, I see you in spite of what you do.
27:12 I see you as God sees you and God sees you as a child,
27:14 you know.
27:16 He sees you as what you are to become.
27:17 Right. I thank you for being here.
27:19 You know, I pray God for how He has delivered you
27:21 and I know that through your testimony
27:22 He will deliver others.
27:24 Praise God.
27:25 We pray that you are blessed today.
27:26 We want you to follow us on Facebook.
27:28 Go to Facebook, type in Pure Choices.
27:29 If you have a question for Lorriane,
27:31 we'll make sure she answers your questions
27:32 for more conversation and dialogue.
27:34 Listen, we'll see you next week,
27:35 be blessed and, you know, we just praise God for you.
27:39 Bye-bye.


Revised 2017-08-28