Pure Choices

Coming Out, Pt. 1

Three Angels Broadcasting Network

Program transcript

Participants: Yvonne Lewis (Host), Ron Woolsey


Series Code: PC

Program Code: PC000010

00:31 Welcome to Pure Choices.
00:33 I'm so glad that you decided to join us for another episode
00:35 where we're going to be dealing with another hot topic,
00:37 but yet a very serious topic.
00:39 Now, you know, that you've been with us all season long,
00:41 we've been dealing with our sexuality,
00:43 and our sex, how God created us,
00:45 and how we can strive to make Pure Choices.
00:47 Today, we're going to have
00:48 a continuation of a previous episode
00:51 part two actually of an episode
00:52 where we dealt with homosexuality.
00:54 But before we get into this topic,
00:55 I want to just take a moment
00:57 and just introduce you again to my colleagues,
00:59 and a very special guest that we have with us today.
01:01 We have, again, here with us
01:03 my Brother Pastor Alfonso Greene
01:05 who's at First SDA Church in Huntsville, Alabama.
01:07 Right.
01:08 And then we have a special guest,
01:10 you may hearing more from her Miss Lorraine Alexis,
01:13 who comes to us from Nashville, Tennessee,
01:15 and she is a second year medical student
01:18 there in Nashville.
01:19 We have with us, again, and we're glad to see you here,
01:21 Miss Sabrina Etienne
01:23 who as well is a student at Southern Adventist University
01:26 in Collegedale, Tennessee area,
01:27 and she's getting her master's in clinical counseling.
01:30 And then we have my Brother Pastor Michael B. Kelley
01:34 who comes to us all the way from Riverside California
01:37 from the Mt. Rubidoux SDA Church.
01:39 And I am your host Pastor Seth Yelorda,
01:42 and I'm glad to be here.
01:43 Today we want to continue with where we left off
01:46 last week with homosexuality,
01:48 and I just want to take a moment,
01:49 just to kind of recap for those of our viewers
01:51 who are here for the first time
01:53 and they didn't catch last week.
01:54 Last week, we talked about homosexuality,
01:56 I know specifically, we dealt with
01:58 is it right or is it wrong.
01:59 You know, where does the Bible stand with it?
02:03 What does society say about homosexuality?
02:06 What are some other areas that we dealt with last week
02:08 when we talked about homosexuality?
02:10 Yeah, I think one of the main was we found
02:12 which connected to another topic
02:13 when we discussed the idea
02:15 of how the media plays a part in sexuality.
02:17 And we said now we see it being more prevalent on TV shows
02:20 so now as opposed to becoming something that's,
02:23 you know, abnormal or something like that or different,
02:26 it now becomes more the normal or comfortable.
02:28 It's more of a comfortable environment.
02:30 Right, right. It's great.
02:31 Hey, I mean, we also, you know, just was talking about,
02:33 you know, nature versus nurture and just really...
02:35 If you're born this way versus...
02:36 If you're born this way versus
02:38 if you picked it up down the rude...
02:39 It just kind of really unpacked it,
02:40 you know, just try to impact that for the viewers.
02:44 And so, you know, just really
02:45 and just trying to get some quick counsel
02:47 from the Word of God.
02:48 Yeah, now we know that homosexuality is prevalent,
02:51 I mean, it's becoming more and more prevalent.
02:53 I mean, not just in society,
02:55 but in the church and we're seeing it.
02:58 And today, we have a very special guest with us
02:59 the Lorraine Alexis.
03:01 And Lorraine has a very interesting story
03:03 about her own experience with homosexual lifestyle.
03:05 So I just want to turn in.
03:06 Lorraine, just, you know, I thank you for being here,
03:08 and I thank you for your willingness
03:09 to be open and transparent,
03:11 I believe that someone's gonna be blessed,
03:13 and healed, and get victory from this episode.
03:16 And so just share with us, you know, briefly your story,
03:19 where you come from, and where God has brought you.
03:21 I mean, wow, thank you so much.
03:24 When we talk about homosexuality
03:25 it's such a big word.
03:27 And I think growing up I always associate homosexuality
03:30 with the psych thing that you started to do
03:33 if something really bad happened to you.
03:36 People often acquitted after being molested,
03:39 or abuse, or if your father wasn't in the home,
03:43 but, you know, you had to go through
03:44 a really traumatic experience to find yourself there.
03:47 And for me that was quite the opposite,
03:49 I grew up in a Christian home, both parents in the home,
03:53 who took us to church, who prayed with us,
03:55 who just loved on us...
03:57 Sabbath school.
03:58 Sabbath school, you name it,
03:59 Pathfinders, I was a part of everything.
04:01 Okay.
04:02 So on the outside, it wouldn't seem that
04:04 I'd be a part of something like that.
04:06 It will appear like there's no reason for you to...
04:08 There was no reason for it, right?
04:11 Even though the media gave its cues at sometimes,
04:14 you know, to make things easy or open,
04:17 you know, at first, I still thought
04:19 it was not something for me.
04:20 And my experience began when I was 16,
04:23 I was in high school.
04:25 My best friend, me and her became friends
04:28 through mutual sports that we played in school,
04:30 and we're really best friends
04:32 for maybe about two or three years before,
04:35 you know, during this process basically what happened.
04:37 Was it a public school or a Christian school?
04:38 This is was a public, I went to public school all long.
04:42 And, you know, we were friends
04:44 and at first nothing became of it.
04:46 You know, we were just really good friends,
04:47 went through a lot of things together.
04:49 And, you know, there came a point
04:51 where little by little the topic of experimentation
04:54 started coming into play.
04:56 And at the time, you know, it started to become
04:58 like a little crazy that people would,
05:00 you know, experiment and find things.
05:01 You know, I kissed the girl and I liked it.
05:03 And so when you saw the people doing things,
05:05 "You know, we could do it too.
05:07 Let's just try."
05:08 And that was sort of the way she initiated certain things.
05:10 "So let's just try this, this is fun."
05:12 And of course, at first it was, you know,
05:15 weird and I didn't want to be a part of it,
05:18 but little by little just like anything
05:20 you start for the first time, you keep going, you keep...
05:24 Oh, it doesn't mean anything really, you know,
05:26 there was a labels or no names that we gave it,
05:30 but little by little it started to become a lot more serious.
05:33 She started to develop feelings for me,
05:35 I didn't really know how to handle it,
05:37 she was my best friend,
05:38 I didn't want to let her down or disappoint her.
05:40 So I continued, I kept up.
05:43 And...
05:44 Can I ask a question on what you've told us?
05:46 This was your first experience, homosexuality.
05:48 Was this her first experience?
05:50 I really didn't know, as we we're going through it,
05:52 I believe that it was the first time.
05:55 I mean, later on, you know, she later disclosed to me
05:58 that she had been struggling with it for a long time,
06:00 but I never really knew.
06:02 But it was definitely my first time
06:05 even being a part of that.
06:06 So what happened as you continued to progress?
06:07 Yeah, little by little we continued,
06:10 and the relationship actually started to develop,
06:12 we actually gave each other titles as girlfriend.
06:15 So you became open at this point.
06:17 Actually no, we kept this very private,
06:18 no one really knew.
06:20 We had one friend that we really confided in,
06:22 who kind of knew what was going on,
06:23 but we never told anyone.
06:25 Our parents never suspected anything
06:27 if we would spend time together because we were best friends,
06:29 our parents expected us
06:30 to spend time together and hang out.
06:32 Yeah.
06:33 They had no problem with sleepover
06:34 as in not knowing where we were for days on ends
06:36 because they never thought or suspected anything
06:39 that was going on.
06:41 So it continued for months.
06:44 Yeah, I was going to ask, you know, one of the things,
06:47 Lorraine, that, you know, just kind of society, you know,
06:50 pretty much people feel like, you know,
06:52 if you're getting engage in this type of relationship,
06:54 and there has to be some type of inclination,
06:58 were you like any point before this
07:00 attracted to people of the same sex
07:03 or anything like that?
07:04 This is kind of a common,
07:05 you know, assumption that people make,
07:08 was that true in your situation?
07:09 Absolutely not.
07:11 I never had an inclination prior to that experience
07:14 even while it was going on,
07:16 I still have those moments I was like,
07:17 "Ew, you know, what am I doing?"
07:20 But when you have someone there that you do care about,
07:22 you know, sometimes you kind of push those
07:24 little feelings to the side and say,
07:26 "It doesn't really mean anything,
07:27 I can try or I've already done this
07:30 so I might as well keep going, I might as well continue."
07:33 So, you know, I didn't have an inclination.
07:36 It became a monogamous friendship.
07:38 Just friendship.
07:40 Amazing that it could start from there.
07:41 It just started as friendship and, you know,
07:44 at first it started out blazing,
07:45 you know, experimentation, it's cool,
07:47 it's what's going on in,
07:49 and it became a lot more serious
07:50 as time progressed.
07:52 As you progressed, you know,
07:53 how did you come victory like what was the process?
07:58 So I think like I said all along,
08:00 you know, I did have that feeling
08:02 knowing that I shouldn't be a part of this,
08:04 you know, I still went to church, I still...
08:06 Sometimes she would come to church with me
08:08 or you know we still open Sabbath
08:10 as a family so my parent...
08:12 You know, should be around my family.
08:15 And it happens, take one day
08:16 where I happen to go to the Sabbath school,
08:18 and the Sabbath school teacher
08:20 was talking about homosexuality,
08:22 and how it was an abomination.
08:24 And within about three or four minutes
08:26 into the lesson,
08:27 I immediately felt this burning inside of me knowing that,
08:31 "Oh, my goodness like this is for me.
08:34 I cannot be a part of this."
08:36 And I literally ran out the church just in tears,
08:38 just crying, crying, crying in the car,
08:41 I thinking to myself, "How did I get this far?
08:43 You know, months have gone by,
08:45 almost a year has gone by, how do I get this far?"
08:48 And I remember that day,
08:50 you know, just really praying like,
08:51 "God help me get out.
08:52 I'm going to get out right now, I'm out."
08:55 And on that day I called my friend
08:56 and explained to her that,
08:59 you know, this could go on no longer.
09:01 And it was devastating.
09:04 Let me ask this when you were going through the relationship
09:07 and obviously still going back and forth to church and around,
09:10 you know, other church people and things like that,
09:13 I know you said you felt like something wasn't right,
09:16 did you not feel comfortable to confide in somebody else
09:19 because of the way you heard
09:21 maybe other people responding to individuals
09:24 who are in the same situation,
09:25 like, you said there's one friend you confided in,
09:27 I'm wondering was that friend somebody
09:30 who was trying to help you out or,
09:31 you know, was there or were you not comfortable
09:33 because of the way maybe you felt like
09:35 you would have been received
09:36 if someone knew what you were going through?
09:37 Right.
09:39 First off, that friend was not a friend
09:40 who was part of the church so I think at times,
09:42 they actually encourage the relationship to continue.
09:46 So they didn't really enforce
09:48 or suggest that maybe you should stop
09:51 if I was feeling anyway, you know,
09:52 they would sort of say, "Well, you feel like this today,
09:54 but tomorrow may change,
09:56 you know, we like the two of you together,"
09:58 or something like that.
10:00 At the time I really would never have thought
10:02 of coming out in the church because A,
10:05 I had not admitted it to myself
10:07 that I was a part of this, why should I say something,
10:10 you know, inside the church,
10:11 then I would be forever labeled as being a part of this,
10:14 and that's not something I was ready to do.
10:16 I had not admitted it to myself.
10:19 And I could see how the church even just society views people
10:23 that are part of this,
10:25 you know, they're unclean and dirty,
10:26 and they're almost contagious by all means...
10:29 Stay away. Stay away.
10:31 So why would I tell the people in my church,
10:33 you know, who already carry those views.
10:35 And so most people that actually do feel were family,
10:37 you know, I didn't want them to see me any different,
10:39 I didn't want them to look at me as though,
10:42 you know, I wasn't the same anymore.
10:44 You said something that there was this part...
10:46 A question for me, you said you did admit to yourself
10:50 almost like you had a hard time with it.
10:51 Can you unpack that, this sounds like powerful
10:53 like you are in something, but you said,
10:55 "I couldn't admit it to myself therefore I didn't get,
10:58 you know, maybe extra help?"
11:00 Can you impact that maybe if you remember any?
11:01 Yeah, absolutely.
11:02 I mean, you doing something
11:04 and you being something it's two different things.
11:06 You know, I can take something from a store,
11:09 but I may not be a stealer,
11:11 I mean, I want to be called somebody who steals.
11:14 So it's easy to do one task and do the next task
11:17 and go to this place and hold hands with this person,
11:20 but if now all of a sudden, you give me a title that means
11:24 that I'm associated with all these other people
11:26 that I don't want to associate with,
11:28 I don't feel she had the same characteristics
11:30 as I do, it's very difficult.
11:32 You know, that's similar
11:33 to what we see taking place in society
11:36 where you have especially men who will say,
11:38 "I'm not homosexual.
11:40 I just like sleeping with other men."
11:41 Yeah.
11:43 You know, it's like their down-low epidemic
11:44 that's taking place.
11:45 You know, so they compartmentalize,
11:47 "No, I'm not homosexual, I just like to sleep with men,
11:49 but I'm not homosexual."
11:50 One thing that I think it's powerful though,
11:52 Lorraine, that you shared though
11:53 is I think it was the realization
11:54 when she went to that Sabbath school's class that day
11:57 like where you were trying to compartmentalize
12:00 these two different things
12:01 it's kind of when you brought it together.
12:03 And it was like, you know what,
12:04 "Man, the Lord is speaking to me about this."
12:08 Once you embrace that because as you are denying it,
12:11 it's still have power over you, and once you embraced it
12:14 then it opened the door for God to come in
12:16 and to actually begin the process
12:18 of deliverance in your life.
12:20 What that process look like?
12:22 So you went to Sabbath school, they told you,
12:24 you heard the Sabbath school teacher talking about it,
12:26 you went out, you called your friend,,
12:27 you know, your friend gave you some flak from there,
12:30 I mean, was it just like cut and dried,
12:32 it was over, you were done,
12:34 did you cut the friend off, like, what was the...
12:35 Not at all, like, I said
12:37 this was the beginning of sorrow for me and my friend.
12:40 You know, she was just so hurt
12:42 and so upset that I had decided this,
12:44 you know, she cursed the church from left to right,
12:47 you know, told me I was foolish and crazy.
12:49 All of a sudden, I was being brainwashed,
12:51 "Why can't I listen anymore?"
12:54 She became depressed, I became depressed,
12:57 it was a cycle of abuse of threatening,
13:00 you know, almost attempted suicide at one point.
13:03 You know, she threatened me that if I would not change,
13:04 that she would kill herself.
13:06 Wow.
13:07 And that took, you know, a really big toll on me,
13:09 and actually put me in a moment of remission
13:11 where I started to say, "Okay, I'm sorry,
13:13 like, I didn't mean that,
13:14 you know, we can go back to how things were.
13:16 Relapse. Kind of relapse.
13:18 And it took several months for me even just to come back
13:21 and say, "Okay, no, I really have to go back to this.
13:23 You know, I don't know what's going to happen,
13:25 but I know that I can't stay here."
13:27 Amen.
13:28 You know, I had an opportunity to be baptized shortly after,
13:31 and for me, that was like a great big step saying,
13:34 "I'm not going back to this, you know, this is over for me."
13:37 And that did not change for my friend,
13:39 you know, that was just a symbol
13:40 it meant nothing to her,
13:42 she was still trying to convince me
13:43 that I need to come back and, you know, do this again and,
13:46 you know, she was just so emotional about it
13:49 and it brought my emotions down...
13:51 Like I said she was my best friend
13:52 and so I didn't know how to handle that,
13:53 I didn't want to lose her friendship.
13:55 So it was a very tough time for me,
13:57 and I think afterward that it really impact me
14:00 in ways I really had not understood.
14:03 I had a lot of issues with self-image, and worth,
14:07 you know, if I was unclean,
14:09 you know, our church puts a nice big veil over
14:11 how young women should be and I was like,
14:13 "Man, I'm not that girl anymore and,
14:16 you know, will someone love me?"
14:19 And also I struggle about who I really was like,
14:23 "Did I always like women?
14:25 Was there something I was naturally inclined to do?"
14:27 You know...
14:28 So there was that confusion there?
14:30 Extreme confusion.
14:31 And who do you talk about this with?
14:33 You know, you're 16 years old, you're like,
14:35 "How do I discuss this with someone
14:37 and them not automatically judge me
14:39 from that point forward."
14:40 Right.
14:41 I'm really trying to figure this out.
14:43 Right. So it was very difficult.
14:44 Why not just look at the Bible?
14:45 I mean, why not just open the Word,
14:47 and, I mean, clearly spills everything out there for us
14:50 and take your cues from that?
14:53 I mean, to be honest, I'm not quite sure
14:55 why I didn't go to the Bible at that point,
14:57 but I feel like you need more at that point
14:59 is something relevant in your face,
15:01 you need someone to just tell you that,
15:02 "I love you," like, "It's going to be okay."
15:04 The Holy Spirit really led me on a process of growth
15:08 and conversion to see God's plan for me,
15:11 but at that point, I just needed someone to tell me
15:12 it's going to be okay.
15:13 You know...
15:15 Some spiritual community.
15:16 Some spiritual community like, "It's going to be okay,"
15:17 like, "Your friend she is going to be okay,
15:20 you know, she is not going to kill herself,
15:21 or we're going to support her too,
15:23 we're going to support whatever you really need right now
15:25 we're going to support you right you."
15:26 You mentioned earlier when we before taping that,
15:30 you kept hearing a voice saying to you
15:31 that this is not you or something along those sorts,
15:34 and that's what kind of always put you uneasy
15:38 with the decisions that you're making
15:39 in your homosexual lifestyle.
15:41 Now let me ask you a question,
15:42 I don't want to take us too far left field
15:44 when we think about those who are engaging
15:45 in homosexuality or in the process of it,
15:48 they may be having thoughts about it,
15:49 do you think many of them right now the uneasiness
15:52 that they're feeling may be their moral compass
15:54 speaking to them and letting them know this is not
15:56 who they truly are?
15:58 I think that's a little bit of everything.
15:59 I think what the society around you
16:02 saying it's not right,
16:04 then there is that little voice inside you saying,
16:06 you know, "This is strange, this is foreign."
16:10 Right. Not normal. Right.
16:11 This is not normal.
16:12 And then there's another part of you that wants to defy,
16:15 you know, a little rebellious,
16:16 you're not that age or even at any age where,
16:19 you know, you want to be part of
16:21 whatever it is that you admire
16:23 or you want to be happy, or love,
16:26 and the people that are giving that to them
16:28 and environment that you're finding that
16:29 then you're going to want to stay in.
16:31 Right. And that's natural for anyone.
16:32 So, you know, I think it's like a personal discovery
16:36 like God really impressed on my heart
16:38 that this was not for me.
16:39 Because I do think that
16:41 society does cause those who are feeling
16:44 and contemplating homosexuality
16:46 to feel like they can't come out.
16:47 However, in your case particular,
16:49 you said that you kept feeling uneasiness about it.
16:52 And, I guess, what I'm saying is that,
16:54 what I'm thinking about is that
16:55 for those who are feeling that same feeling that you had,
16:58 maybe if they would begin to investigate
17:00 and explore it now,
17:02 they wouldn't delve into the homosexuality
17:05 and things like that and begin to live that lifestyle out
17:07 if they begin to investigate
17:09 and just kind of nip it at the root cause
17:11 of what they're feeling now.
17:12 I think that be important
17:14 if you had someone that you can confide in
17:15 or if you felt in environment
17:17 where you can sort of talk it out actually hear it,
17:20 sometimes after I spoke it out loud,
17:23 "This is what I was doing, this is what I was a part of."
17:25 I really started to say,
17:26 "Wait a second, this was not..."
17:27 You know, I started to put the dots together and see,
17:31 "What made me start doing this?
17:32 Was this something I was doing all along?
17:34 No. Was it this person that I started do it?
17:37 Was I manipulated perhaps?"
17:40 And I do think that's an important point,
17:42 you know, when you start to feel uneasy and,
17:44 you know, I believe that's the Holy Spirit
17:45 really tapping on you saying, "Something is off."
17:48 You know, I think I want to say something
17:50 about those feelings just, you know,
17:51 and I think those are very important,
17:53 Holy Spirit does, of course, use those.
17:55 Sometimes though our feelings can deceive us in a sense
17:58 because it could be someone out there
17:59 who's in gauging that and not feeling that.
18:00 Right.
18:02 And so they need to understand even though you're not feeling
18:04 that this is wrong or inappropriate,
18:07 there's some principles you have to look at to say,
18:09 "Okay, if I'm not feeling right,
18:11 but what is the principle and standard?"
18:14 I think that's a blessing
18:15 that you are able to get the feeling,
18:16 I know some folk they just don't feel it,
18:18 and that's what sometimes they wait for,
18:19 they wait for the feeling
18:21 to kick in then know what's wrong,
18:23 but it never comes, I think sometimes feelings...
18:26 I mean, convictions don't always come in the form,
18:29 I think always a feeling sometimes it's seem something
18:32 and just becoming aware in a different sense.
18:36 I think something else to add onto that
18:37 as far as what has kind of helped to,
18:40 you know, the Lord have the room to work
18:42 in this situation
18:43 is just the emphasis on the type of environment.
18:46 And I know that some of our churches or some churches
18:49 or some situations are not conducive
18:51 to be able to be honest and open
18:54 about the real struggles,
18:55 but that's I think the vision for all of our church,
18:58 but I think that's even the vision
19:00 for this Pure Choices
19:01 because what we want is to create a dialogue
19:04 even on the internet
19:05 and wherever where you can really share
19:07 what you're dealing with, and what you're going through,
19:10 and that's part of the process of finding that deliverance.
19:11 To find that spiritual community even if it's online.
19:13 Even if it's online.
19:15 And I also think, you know,
19:16 we have to stop compartmentalizing sin.
19:19 You know, we have to stop making
19:20 one sin bigger than the other
19:21 or one sin more evil than the other.
19:23 It is all sin.
19:24 And God really had to show me that,
19:26 you know, the person who lies, they're just like you,
19:28 "You know, you made a mistake, you sin, you went against Me,
19:32 but I restore you, I can you make you better,
19:34 I can make you new."
19:36 There's nothing he can't bring you back from.
19:37 There's nothing he can bring you back from.
19:38 So I mean, they say hindsight 2020,
19:40 looking back into the situation.
19:43 I mean, what do you think the church could do,
19:45 you know, and then what do you think that individual
19:48 who is in that situation needs to do, you know?
19:51 Definitely, church has to show more love towards...
19:53 Openness.
19:55 Openness so that people can come forward
19:57 doesn't matter what it is.
19:58 You know, I think...
19:59 Whether it's homosexuality, or immorality, or whatever.
20:01 Homosexuality, or immorality, or whatever it is
20:04 even if it's just one specific incident
20:05 or event that happened
20:07 and you're not quite sure how to deal with it,
20:09 there should be an outlet for or a venue
20:11 where you can sort of share this and unpacked it
20:13 without any kind of judgment,
20:15 you know, where you can even just talk it out,
20:17 and I think that's really important.
20:20 For people who are going through this,
20:21 you know, you're not worthless,
20:25 you're not, you know, there will be life after this.
20:27 God can really show you happiness
20:29 that you have not yet experienced.
20:30 And I think what kept me there for a long time
20:33 or it kept my mind, you know,
20:35 really reeling from all of it was that,
20:37 okay, I had some sort of happiness there,
20:39 but it wasn't real it didn't fit into the real life
20:43 that I really had, it was this little glimpse
20:45 and the secret place that
20:46 really wasn't what life was about,
20:48 it wasn't what God had wanted from me.
20:51 And, you know, hindsight I'm seeing
20:53 how God has brought me out,
20:55 and seeing what He's done for me is tremendous,
20:56 and I could have never seen that in my little hole
20:58 in what I thought would make me happy.
21:01 So, you know, to trust God and it's not going to be easy,
21:04 you know, they're going to be people
21:05 who are going to look at you different,
21:06 who are going to find you funny,
21:08 but God is able.
21:09 You know, I was going to just ask Lorraine,
21:11 you know, one other things that,
21:12 you know, where I first heard
21:14 you shared this was at a Bible conference.
21:16 And I don't know if that was at the first time
21:17 you've shared it.
21:19 That was the first time I shared that
21:20 with a larger group of people.
21:22 I've shared it one-on-one with people
21:23 that I know we're going through some of the struggles.
21:24 What was it about that environment
21:27 'cause we talk about really trying to,
21:30 you know, create an environment
21:32 where people can actually be open and share...
21:34 What was it about that Bible conference
21:36 that kind of allowed you to be
21:37 able to feel comfortable to share?
21:39 I mean, the Holy Spirit was there, I have to say that.
21:43 And it started opening
21:44 when people just started sharing.
21:45 You know, it started even little by little,
21:47 "Man, you know, I'm in a relationship with a guy,
21:49 and we're doing things that we really shouldn't be doing."
21:52 And then or, "Man, you know,
21:53 God really brought me out of this situation."
21:55 You know and I really felt the Holy Spirit nudging on me
21:58 that "you need to share this."
21:59 Many people share their testimonies,
22:01 and it seemed like people were getting heeling.
22:03 And for me I didn't really feel like I needed healing,
22:05 I actually thought that I was healed,
22:06 I actually thought that I was fine,
22:08 but that voice was just saying, "You need to speak."
22:11 And out of obedience,
22:12 out of just listening to the voice of God,
22:14 I just shared, you know, I just shared,
22:16 this is my story, this is what I went,
22:18 you know, I didn't need any sort of healing,
22:19 but I need to share.
22:21 And I realized that through me just being obedient
22:25 it was someone else's cure for healing.
22:27 It was someone else's door to say,
22:30 "Okay, I can move pass this
22:32 if I'm struggling with the same thing
22:33 or I can share my testimony that something different,
22:36 you know, how God has blessed me,
22:37 and even if I'm still in it, He's going to get me out of it,
22:40 and I believe that He's going to get me out of it."
22:43 I wanted to ask when you came to that point
22:46 where you are like, you know,
22:48 enough is enough going back just a little bit,
22:50 and you told your friend even the second time,
22:52 "Hey, I'm away from that."
22:53 Were you able to continue your friendship at all?
22:56 For a long time, I really tried to,
22:58 but I tried for so long to continue our friendship,
23:01 but it was impossible, it was impossible to do so.
23:04 And it's something I think
23:06 I still wrestle with to this day
23:08 is that that friendship was never the same.
23:11 But I blame myself a lot, you know,
23:13 our church as being on evangelism almost like,
23:15 we're individual evangelizers,
23:17 you know, we have to bring people to Christ
23:19 and I kept feeling like it was my role,
23:21 but I was not strong enough at that point
23:23 to bring her back.
23:24 I need God to work on me and, you know,
23:27 I prayed for her all the time
23:29 that God would just work on her heart,
23:31 and even help her to forgive me,
23:33 forgive me for, you know,
23:35 the hurt that I've caused or the pain
23:36 that I caused to her while I was still confused.
23:40 So there was a point though
23:41 because I think it's important for,
23:43 you know, listeners to know
23:45 that sometimes we have to separate ourselves
23:47 from the situation.
23:48 Absolutely.
23:50 I mean, the Bible says that it's like Amos 3:3,
23:51 "Can two walk together unless they be agree," you know, so...
23:55 As somebody else is rolling out and help
23:57 bring that person to Christ.
23:58 Right, right.
23:59 And I just think it's probably because it's the idea of,
24:02 again, we never show pure choices
24:04 in order for you to make those other choices
24:06 you had to make a very difficult choice
24:08 that obviously still today
24:10 obviously what you knew had to be done,
24:12 was it easy in order for you to be where, you know,
24:14 where you are today?
24:15 I mean, I was the only Christian representation
24:17 in that person's life
24:18 and that made it very hard for me to walk away.
24:20 So I kept thinking like, what if she's not saved,
24:22 you know, like I want her to be in having to,
24:24 and how could I walk away and leave her,
24:27 but God actually showed me like, "You can do this,
24:29 I will just take care of it, just trust Me,
24:31 we're going to get to a place that's better than this."
24:33 And I didn't see that at first,
24:35 I fought it for a very long time,
24:36 but, you know, looking back and I can definitely see
24:38 that's what God has brought me to.
24:39 Lorraine, how is the life now for you?
24:42 It's good.
24:44 You know, I've really seen how God has brought me through,
24:47 He has given me a new self-image,
24:49 and, you know, I'm not so concerned,
24:51 I have no secrets.
24:52 And that's like a great feeling
24:54 to know that God has blessed me,
24:55 and He's going to use me, and it's not easy,
24:57 you know, I still sometimes get scared
24:59 about being associated with this or with that,
25:02 but I want to be in heaven so.
25:05 You know, I firmly believe you have nothing to be ashamed
25:07 of which you got victory over it.
25:08 Absolutely.
25:09 You know, as God gives you victory,
25:11 "Listen, I'm not ashamed, you know, this is who I was,
25:13 this is where I was," and God, He restores.
25:16 The Bible clearly says He makes all things beautiful
25:19 in His time.
25:20 So though I might have made some mistakes, and messed up,
25:22 if I just placed my life in the hands of the master,
25:25 He will make me, you know, into His image.
25:27 And I think that's perfect to understand
25:29 because God will send people to love you
25:32 in spite of all of that,
25:33 and I think for a long time I believe that
25:34 no one would love me because of it,
25:36 and people know and love me anyway,
25:38 and that's like a beautiful thing
25:40 they know exactly what I've done,
25:41 and they love me anyway because I'm not the same.
25:43 So if you could in the last few moments we have,
25:46 somebody is in your situation right now
25:48 or something similar
25:49 whether it's be being because they pulled in,
25:51 maybe some others things have happened,
25:52 they've just experiment making their choice,
25:54 what's their first step?
25:55 What do they do to make sure
25:58 they don't get caught up in more of a cycle
25:59 so it becomes increasingly different to get out?
26:01 Definitely pray, and ask God for some peace.
26:05 I think separating yourself
26:06 from the situation even temporarily,
26:08 you know, to get that little window
26:09 so that Holy Spirit can really speak to you
26:12 is really imperative.
26:13 I think I needed that little break of time,
26:15 and I think God will really,
26:17 He will really show you what you need to do next.
26:20 I think more importantly,
26:21 I want to speak to those that are around those people,
26:23 sometimes, you know, I've seen people suspect
26:25 that certain things are going on,
26:27 don't talk about those people,
26:28 you know, really just encourage them,
26:30 and love on them as God really works through them
26:32 because everybody's moment
26:34 with the Holy Spirit is different
26:36 and they got to get there on their own.
26:38 You know, that reminds me
26:39 nothing I think I said last week
26:41 when we we're talking about this that
26:43 the church's response should be one of the God judges,
26:46 the Holy Spirit convicts, and the church loves.
26:50 You know, and if the church would just do that just love,
26:52 you know, regardless of what's your issue, your sin,
26:54 your stumble, your mistake,
26:56 "Yeah, we love you
26:57 and we're going to love you back into Christ."
27:00 And a lot of times, unfortunately,
27:01 we look at love as though
27:03 I accept everything you do, right.
27:05 And love is not I accept everything you do, no,
27:07 I mean, love is I see you in spite of what you do,
27:12 I see you as God sees you, and God sees you as a child,
27:15 you know, he sees you as what you are to become.
27:18 I thank you for being here. Thank you.
27:20 I pray God for how He's delivered you,
27:21 and I know that through your testimony,
27:22 He will deliver others.
27:24 Praise God.
27:25 We pray that you are blessed today,
27:27 we want you to follow us on Facebook, go to Facebook,
27:28 type in Pure Choices if you have a question for Lorraine,
27:30 we'll make sure she answers your questions
27:32 for more conversation and dialogue.
27:34 Listen, we'll see you next week, be blessed, and,
27:37 you know, we just praise God for you.
27:39 Bye-bye.


Revised 2018-01-18