Participants:
Series Code: SSP
Program Code: SSP210033S
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00:01 Hello, friends, I'm Jill Morikone
00:02 and we're delighted that you've joined us 00:04 for 3ABN Sabbath School Panel. 00:05 Hard to believe we're on lesson number 7, 00:08 Rest, Relationships and Healing. 00:10 We're gonna actually continue the story of Joseph 00:13 that we began last week. 00:15 I want to encourage you to grab your Bibles 00:17 and your pens and your notebooks 00:18 and your Adult Bible Study Guide 00:20 that you can study along with us. 00:22 If you don't have your own copy, 00:24 you can go to the following website 00:25 ABSG.Adventist.org 00:29 that stands for AdultBibleStudyGuide 00:32 .Adventist.org 00:34 Download that so you'll be ready 00:36 for this edition of 3ABN Sabbath School Panel. 01:09 What a joy it is to journey through the Word of God. 01:12 What a joy it is to spend time with you our 3ABN family 01:15 and with our 3ABN family here on the set. 01:18 I want to introduce them to you at this time, 01:20 to my left Pastor Ryan Day. 01:22 Privileged to have you here, Brother. 01:23 Amen. 01:25 So thankful to be a part of this wonderful panel 01:26 and today we're gonna be talking about 01:28 one of my favorite Bible stories, Joseph. 01:30 Amen. 01:31 So yeah, I'm dealing with Joseph. 01:33 Amen. 01:34 To your left my sister Shelley Quinn, 01:35 joy to have you here. 01:37 It's always a pleasure and a privilege 01:38 to study with you and to study with you. 01:41 Amen. 01:43 Pastor John Dinzey, 01:44 privileged to have you here, Pastor. 01:46 It's a blessing to be here. It's a blessing. 01:47 Amen. 01:49 Last but not least, Pastor John Lomacang. 01:51 Thank you, Pastor John, for what you do. 01:53 You know, this is a powerful lesson, 01:55 finding rest and forgiveness. 01:57 And I'm just excited about it. 01:58 Because I think this is one of the topics 02:00 that people tend to probably not be well informed about. 02:04 And I'm praying for a chance today 02:06 to open some doors. 02:08 Amen. 02:09 Before we go any further 02:10 we want to go to the Lord in prayer. 02:12 Pastor Ryan, would you pray for us? 02:13 Sure. Absolutely. 02:15 Our Father in heaven Lord, here we are again, 02:16 another study here on 3ABN Sabbath School Panel. 02:19 We have you to thank Lord, for all of the powerful lessons 02:22 that we've been diving deep into, 02:25 we've been picking apart the Word of God 02:26 to learn Your will for our life, Lord. 02:28 And here we are again today, 02:29 we're talking about forgiveness. 02:31 And, Lord, we need to know Your heart on forgiveness. 02:35 So give us the Holy Spirit, Lord, 02:36 make the Word just amplified 02:38 by in our hearts and minds, Lord, 02:40 and more than anything help us to see 02:41 the lovingkindness 02:43 and the character of Jesus Christ 02:44 through this study, 02:46 as it goes out all around the world. 02:47 Bless us, Lord, 02:49 and draw us closer as I always pray 02:51 to our Savior Jesus Christ, 02:52 we ask in Jesus' name, amen. 02:54 Amen. 02:56 Last week, of course, we studied Joseph 02:58 and we looked at the dysfunction of his family. 03:00 We look at how he made a choice for God. 03:03 He found his self worth in God, the way that he stood for God, 03:07 regardless of the temptations that were there in Egypt, 03:11 him being thrown in prison 03:12 and then being elevated to prime minister. 03:14 This week, we look specifically at the role of forgiveness, 03:19 and what that plays in our relationships 03:22 in the healing that we need in rest. 03:25 I sat in the chair, 03:27 my hands tightly clenched together 03:30 to keep them from shaking. 03:31 I would not give him the satisfaction 03:34 of seeing how much his words hurt. 03:37 Fighting back tears, I still remember it 03:39 as if it were yesterday, 03:40 I willed my mind to another place anywhere 03:43 just to get out of the room. 03:45 Each word, each accusation, 03:48 each lie, it pierced my heart deeper. 03:51 Somehow, finally, it was over 03:54 and I made it to the door and I left. 03:56 And the days the weeks and months that followed, 04:00 those words, they haunted me, 04:02 Satan used them to torment and to taunt me. 04:07 I wanted to forgive and forget. 04:11 But the pain of what that, 04:12 what happened that day, stayed with me. 04:16 Forgiveness does not mean 04:18 that what the other person did to us is right. 04:22 It simply frees us 04:24 from constantly being damaged by that person. 04:28 Forgiveness, it frees us from bitterness. 04:31 Forgiveness, it frees us from resentment. 04:33 Forgiveness brings with it indescribable peace. 04:38 It's like a burden that is rolled off your back. 04:41 You know, they say unforgiveness 04:43 is like drinking poison, 04:44 hoping that the other person is gonna die. 04:47 Unforgiveness, it only hurts you. 04:51 Each member of the panel, 04:52 we're gonna be talking about Joseph 04:54 and that journey in forgiveness. 04:56 And I know I have my own journey 04:58 and how God led me to forgive in that situation. 05:02 But let's look at our memory text. 05:05 Genesis 45:5. 05:08 But now, this is Joseph speaking. 05:11 "Do not therefore be grieved or angry with yourselves, 05:15 because you sold me here. 05:17 For God He sent me before you to preserve life." 05:22 On Sunday we look at facing the past. 05:25 We already talked last week about 05:27 how Joseph's home was dysfunctional. 05:29 There was envy and jealousy and bitterness 05:31 and revenge and desire for power. 05:34 There was lust, there was sexual sin. 05:37 Joseph's brothers wanted to kill him 05:39 and they sold him as a slave into Egypt. 05:42 He made a choice on that journey 05:44 to serve the God of his father's. 05:47 He was a slave, of course, in Potiphar's house. 05:51 He was thrown into prison on a trumped up unjust charge. 05:56 He was released from prison, 05:58 and made the prime minister of Egypt 06:00 at the age, the young age, 06:02 Pastor Ryan of 30, prime minister, 06:05 second in command to the king. 06:08 There were seven years of plenty 06:10 in the land of Egypt, 06:12 where Joseph married had two children, 06:14 and he stored up food for the coming famine. 06:19 Then the seven years of famine began 06:22 and the famine reached all the way to Canaan. 06:24 And that's where we pick up the story. 06:26 We're in Genesis Chapter 42. 06:28 Genesis 42:1-4, 06:31 when Jacob, that's Joseph's daddy, 06:34 he hadn't seen them for many, many years, 06:36 "When Jacob saw that there was grain in Egypt, 06:38 Jacob said to his sons, 06:39 'Why do you look at one another?' 06:41 And he said, 06:42 'Indeed I have heard that there is grain in Egypt, 06:44 go down to that place and buy for us there, 06:46 that we may live and not die.'" 06:49 So Joseph's 10 brothers went down 06:51 to buy grain in Egypt. 06:53 But Jacob did not send Joseph's brother, Benjamin 06:56 with his brothers, for he said, 06:58 "Lest some calamity overfall him." 07:02 So we see from this passage that Joseph's father, 07:05 he's still alive, 07:07 that the famine has extended 07:08 all the way to the land of Canaan, 07:10 that Jacob now favors his brother Benjamin. 07:14 Remember, he favored Joseph all those years before. 07:16 Now he favors Benjamin. 07:19 And yet, he still mourns the loss of his son, Joseph. 07:24 Let's jump down to verse 6. 07:25 This is when Joseph sees his brothers again. 07:28 Genesis 42:6, 07:30 "Now Joseph was governor over the land, 07:32 and it was he who sold to all the people of the land, 07:34 and Joseph's brothers came and bowed down before him 07:37 with their faces to the earth, 07:38 just like in the dream all those years before. 07:41 Joseph saw his brothers and recognized them, 07:43 but he acted as a stranger to them 07:45 and spoke roughly to them. 07:48 Then he said, 'Where do you come from?' 07:50 And they said, 07:51 'From the land of Canaan to buy food.' 07:53 So Joseph recognized his brothers, 07:55 but they did not recognize him.'" 07:57 Probably 21 years have passed 07:58 since Joseph's brothers sold him into slavery. 08:02 He's all grown up. 08:03 He's wearing Egyptian clothes. 08:05 He's the second in command to the king and the brothers, 08:07 they don't recognize him at all, 08:09 but he surely recognize them. 08:11 And so what's fascinating to me, 08:13 why did he speak roughly to them? 08:15 I always wondered that, in the story 08:17 why did he speak roughly to them? 08:19 First of all, it was to test them, 08:21 had they really changed. 08:23 Were they kind men now instead of harsh? 08:26 Were they humble men instead of jealous and proud? 08:29 Who were they really now? 08:31 Had they truly repented? 08:33 And also was a lesson brought out. 08:35 It was to ascertain the welfare of his father 08:37 and other brother Benjamin in Egypt. 08:41 He was worried about them, you know, he's out of the way. 08:44 Joseph had power on them. 08:46 He had power in Egypt, 08:47 he could have easily taken revenge on his brothers. 08:50 But instead, he's worried about his family, 08:51 his father and his brother Benjamin. 08:53 Had the brothers somehow transferred 08:55 their jealousy from him 08:57 over to Benjamin, 08:58 where they changed men? 08:59 In Genesis 42:13, we see, the brothers say, 09:03 "Your servants are 12 brothers, 09:05 the sons of one man in the land of Canaan. 09:07 In fact, the youngest is with our father today, 09:10 and one is no more." 09:12 So Joseph gets the answer he's looking for, 09:15 his dad is still alive, 09:17 and his little brother Benjamin is still alive as well. 09:20 So Joseph accuses them of being spies, 09:23 wants to keep them in Egypt. 09:24 He really wants to see Benjamin 09:26 and make sure Benjamin is okay. 09:28 He puts the three brothers in prison for three days, 09:32 the brothers in prison for three days. 09:34 And then he says, if you're honest men, 09:36 let one of the brothers stay here 09:37 and the rest of you. 09:39 You can go back home to daddy, 09:40 but make sure that next time you come, 09:44 your brother Benjamin is with you. 09:48 You know what's interesting? 09:50 Joseph now was in a position of power. 09:52 Joseph was in a position to exact revenge. 09:56 But instead of that, 09:58 Joseph is concerned about the welfare of others. 10:02 He's concerned about the welfare of his father, 10:05 and the welfare of his brother, Benjamin. 10:09 People are important. 10:10 They should be important to us 10:12 because they're clearly important to God. 10:15 We are all created in the image of God. 10:17 We are brothers and sisters. 10:20 I think about the sheep and the goats. 10:21 This is Matthew 25. 10:23 And remember, Jesus separated the sheep and the goats 10:25 and those on the left hand, 10:27 He said to depart from him 10:28 and be cursed into everlasting destruction. 10:30 Well, that's pretty harsh. 10:32 What did they do 10:33 to deserve such a terrible punishment? 10:35 They neglected the hungry. 10:37 They ignored the hurting and the suffering. 10:40 They overlooked the sick. 10:42 They judged the prisoner. 10:45 We have a responsibility for the care of others. 10:50 I want to talk just a moment 10:51 about the difference between 10:52 a healthy relationship and an abusive relationship. 10:56 A healthy relationship is built on unselfish love. 10:59 An abusive relationship is built on fear. 11:02 Healthy relationship is built on freedom. 11:05 An abusive relationship is built on power and control. 11:09 A healthy relationship is built on trust. 11:12 An abusive relationship is built on suspicion. 11:16 A healthy relationship is built on security. 11:19 An abusive relationship is built on uncertainty. 11:22 A healthy relationship owns mistakes 11:25 and accepts responsibility. 11:27 An abusive relationship blames the other person. 11:31 A healthy relationship is built on respect. 11:33 An abusive relationship is built on intimidation. 11:37 A healthy relationship is built on honesty. 11:40 An abusive relationship is built on manipulation. 11:43 A healthy relationship is built on unselfishness. 11:47 An abusive relationship is built on self. 11:51 I want to talk just a moment for those of you 11:54 who might be trapped right now in an abusive relationship. 11:58 This could be sexual abuse, it could be emotional abuse, 12:00 it could be physical abuse, and you say there's no way out. 12:04 "Jill, I don't know how to get out. 12:05 I am trapped. 12:07 I want to be free, 12:09 but I don't know how to get out." 12:12 I want to give you four keys. 12:14 Number one, 12:15 there is no excuse for abuse. 12:17 An abuse is the result of sin. 12:22 Proverbs 10:6, 12:23 "Blessings are in the head of the righteous, 12:25 but violence, 12:26 it covers the mouth of the wicked." 12:29 It is a result of Adam and Eve sin 12:31 and by extension 12:33 all the way down 12:34 the sin that is in this world today. 12:36 It's a result of Satan's world 12:38 and Satan's design 12:40 that brings abuse. 12:41 Abuse is clearly the result of sin. 12:43 Key number two, God hates abuse. 12:47 Proverbs 11:5, 12:49 "The Lord investigates the righteous, 12:51 but the wicked and the one who loves violence 12:53 His soul hates." 12:54 Now that doesn't mean God hates the abuser. 12:57 But God hates abuse. 12:59 Key number three, 13:01 it is not your fault. 13:02 Hear me right now. 13:04 No matter what kind of abuse you have experienced, 13:07 there is nothing you can do. 13:08 Nothing you can say, 13:10 nothing you think 13:11 that makes you deserving of that abuse. 13:14 There is no mistake you could have made 13:16 and no sin you could have committed 13:19 to make you deserving of violence. 13:21 You did not deserve this. 13:22 It is never your fault. 13:26 God has a plan for your life. 13:28 Jeremiah 29:11, 13:30 "It is better the plan He has 13:32 the thoughts He has toward us is better and higher 13:35 than we could have ever imagined." 13:37 Key number four, 13:38 God, He can bring deliverance. 13:40 2 Samuel 22:47, 13:43 "The Lord lives, blessed be my rock. 13:45 Let God be exalted the rock of my salvation. 13:48 It is God who avenges me and subdues the people. 13:51 He delivers me from my enemies. 13:53 You also lift me up above those who rise against me, 13:56 You have delivered me from the violent man." 13:59 God brings deliverance. 14:00 Sometimes that deliverance comes through a direct miracle, 14:03 divine intervention. 14:04 Sometimes it comes from a choice 14:06 to leave the abuser and seek protection and safety. 14:09 Sometimes it comes through outside intervention, 14:12 but God can bring deliverance, healing and restoration. 14:16 Amen. 14:18 Thank you so much Jill. 14:19 Appreciate, you set that up perfectly. 14:21 And I'm gonna continue to set it up 14:23 because Monday's lesson is entitled 14:25 "Setting the Stage". 14:27 And as I mentioned earlier, 14:28 this is one of my favorite stories, 14:30 Joseph, I just, I love it. 14:31 I love the story so much. 14:33 It's a story of redemption. 14:35 It's a story of forgiveness. 14:36 And it's a story of unification 14:39 of those people that were separated for so long, 14:41 obviously Joseph and his family. 14:44 But what's powerful as I'm gonna kind of reiterate 14:46 just a few things that you brought out. 14:47 Up to this point, we can be sure that 14:49 Joseph has already forgiven his brothers now 14:52 as to when that actually took place in the past. 14:54 We know that it had happened obviously 14:56 because the Lord probably wouldn't have been 14:57 able to continue to use Joseph 15:00 if he still had that hatred and that unforgiving spirit 15:03 within his heart, 15:05 otherwise it would have damaged 15:06 his relationship with the Lord. 15:07 But sometime in times past between, 15:09 you know, the time that Joseph was in prison, 15:11 and now he chose, he made the decision 15:14 to give that over to the Lord. 15:15 And he chose to forgive his brothers. 15:17 But just because he chose to forgive his brothers 15:19 doesn't mean he's forgotten. 15:20 And at this point, 15:22 we see that he continues to put them to the test. 15:25 So as he has given them instruction to go back, 15:27 and now retrieve their brother, Benjamin 15:29 and bring him back. 15:31 And he's also now determined 15:32 that he's gonna keep one of them. 15:34 Now notice the conversation that happens, 15:36 because while Joseph has forgiven them, 15:40 he's still a little leery as to have they really changed 15:42 or are they the same individuals. 15:44 And so he goes through this multiple step process 15:47 in which he puts them to the test. 15:49 And I think this was good for everyone 15:51 in the sense that it's gonna actually 15:52 in the end bring them closer. 15:54 And it's gonna bring even more healing to, 15:57 I believe Joseph's heart and mind to know that 15:59 through all of this process, 16:00 his brothers really have changed 16:02 that they're not the same individuals. 16:04 And so notice here, Genesis 42, 16:06 I'm gonna begin in verse 21. 16:08 And we're gonna read on to verse 24. 16:10 So notice what it says here, it says, 16:11 "Then they said to one another," 16:12 because remember, Joseph has given them the message, 16:15 go back and get your brother and bring them back. 16:16 Now they start to kind of, they're a little bit upset, 16:20 you know, because they recognize 16:21 what he's asking them to do. 16:23 So they say to one another, 16:24 "We are truly guilty concerning our brother, 16:27 for we saw the anguish of his soul 16:30 when he pleaded with us, and we would not hear, 16:33 therefore this distress has come upon us. 16:37 And Reuben answered and said to them, saying, 16:40 'Did I not speak to you, saying, 16:43 'Do not sin against the boy, and you would not listen? 16:46 Therefore behold, his blood is now required of us.' 16:50 But they did not know that Joseph understood them, 16:53 for he was speaking to them through an interpreter. 16:56 And he turned himself away from them and wept. 16:59 Then he returned to them again, and talked with them. 17:02 And he took Simeon from them 17:04 and bound him before their eyes." 17:07 I find it interesting that 17:08 Reuben is the one who spoke up 17:10 because if you remember back early on in the story, 17:11 Ruben was the one when they said, 17:13 hey, let's just throw him in this pit 17:14 and kill him, right? 17:16 Or and they, actually they just wanted to kill him in general. 17:18 They didn't even bring in the pit in the story. 17:20 And Ruben stepped in said, No, no, no, look, 17:22 let's just toss him in this pit. 17:23 Teach him a lesson. 17:25 But no, we cannot bring bad news back to our father 17:27 who loves Joseph so much, 17:29 we're not gonna kill this brother. 17:30 So Reuben actually came to Joseph's aid. 17:33 So now he's speaking again, 17:35 almost like a judgment against them to remind them, 17:37 look, we're in this situation 17:39 because of what you guys have done. 17:41 But also Ruben recognizes that he's not, 17:44 you know, he's, you know, 17:45 his hands aren't washed clean from the situation, 17:47 because he even went along with lying to their father 17:49 all these years over this situation. 17:52 But it's interesting to the story says 17:54 that Joseph heard them say this, 17:56 he broke away for a moment, and he wept. 17:59 You could just see that in this moment, 18:01 he's seeing a glimpse that maybe they have changed, 18:04 maybe they are different, 18:05 maybe they truly are sorrowful for what they have done to me. 18:09 And he breaks away, he weeps, he comes back. 18:11 But yet, he's still a little skeptical, 18:13 because he's thinking to himself, 18:14 he's remembering all those things. 18:16 I mean, these are the same brothers, 18:17 a couple of them who deceived an entire city, 18:19 remember, with the whole situation with Dinah, 18:21 and also, you know, 18:23 all these years, they have lied to their father. 18:25 So he's still a little skeptical, 18:26 but he continues on. 18:28 And at this point, we know that, 18:29 you know, at this point, 18:31 Joseph feel sorry for them, and for their suffering, 18:33 and he weeps for them at this point. 18:34 I can just see the heart of Christ in Joseph, 18:36 Joseph is one of those that we can most definitely say, 18:39 is a type of Christ, 18:40 for Jesus wept for His people. 18:42 And I could just imagine, as he was weeping, 18:44 he sorrows for the fact that he knows they're hurting. 18:47 And he knows that the decision they made many years before 18:50 has affected them deeply as it did him. 18:52 And so now that he's given them instruction, 18:54 they've returned. 18:55 And they, you know, make a long story short, 18:57 they now have made the dealings with Jacob 19:00 to bring Benjamin back. 19:02 Now they've returned to Egypt. 19:04 And this is where we're gonna pick up now on the story, 19:06 where, you know, they, they're now Joseph invites them 19:08 to call all come together and eat with them. 19:10 So they're all having lunch together. 19:12 And they're sitting around this table. 19:13 And so Joseph continues to test. 19:15 Are they really different? Well, let's see. 19:16 Because he remembers 19:17 when I was there, they picked on me 19:19 because I was father's favorite. 19:21 Do they do that to Benjamin? 19:23 I wonder if they treat Benjamin the way that they treated me. 19:25 So he sets them all around the table, 19:27 and he provides food with them. 19:28 But notice what Genesis 43:34 says, it says, 19:32 "Then he took servings to them from before him, 19:35 but Benjamin serving was five times 19:38 as much as any of theirs. 19:40 So they drink and were merry with him." 19:43 So it was almost like a little test. 19:44 I wonder how they're gonna react to this. 19:45 Are they gonna have that same jealous spirit 19:47 that they had towards me, 19:48 you know, when I was younger? 19:50 Are they gonna treat Benjamin the same way? 19:51 But he noticed that they didn't. 19:53 They didn't treat Benjamin the same way. 19:55 They were merry as the scripture says, 19:56 and happy with him, 19:58 but yet there's still one last test 20:00 that Joseph is gonna place upon this situation. 20:02 He wants to give them one last test. 20:04 And we know this is where the silver cup comes in. 20:07 Because now he's gonna send them back 20:09 as if that he's gonna send them back 20:10 with all this food. 20:12 And he places 20:13 or has a certain place a silver cup 20:15 in Benjamin's food sack, 20:17 and he returns all of their money 20:19 puts each of their monies in the sack with the food. 20:21 And he sends them off as if they're happy, 20:22 they're merry, they're gonna go back 20:24 and they're gonna feed their family. 20:25 He led some getaways down the road. 20:27 And then he stops them and accuses them of thievery. 20:30 Someone stole from my house gold or silver. 20:32 And so they come back and now they recognize 20:35 that something's not right. 20:36 They're pleading for their life. 20:38 They cut the bags open. 20:39 Joseph had this setup all through the story. 20:42 And obviously we see there that the silver cup was in 20:45 none other than Benjamin's, Benjamin sack. 20:48 So now what's interesting that takes place here is that 20:53 through all of this, Joseph test them to basically, 20:56 he threatens to make Benjamin his slave and his, 20:59 you know, as slaves in his house 21:00 and to keep him. 21:02 And this is where the ultimate test comes in. 21:04 Because they could have been just like they did with Joseph, 21:06 oh, you know, horrible situation. 21:08 You know, let him be and then go on, 21:10 because that's what they would have done to Joseph. 21:12 But in this situation, powerful moment happens. 21:14 His brother Judah, who was one of those 21:16 who were just as much wanted to see Joseph dead, 21:19 who was very much responsible for throwing Joseph in that pit 21:22 and selling him off to those Ishmaelites. 21:25 We see here that Judah intercedes, 21:26 and he throws himself at the feet of Joseph, 21:29 and he pleads for basically 21:32 Joseph to take himself in place of Benjamin. 21:35 He sees the heart, he sees the love, 21:37 he sees that, that pleading spirit, 21:41 that loving spirit to say, 21:42 look, we can't dare break our father's heart again. 21:45 This happened a second time 21:46 as we mistreated our first brother. 21:48 Now this one it would kill our father, 21:50 please take me in his place. 21:51 And it breaks Joseph 21:53 because Joseph finally sees 21:54 these are not the same brothers that left me to die 21:58 or sold me off, you know, a few years back. 22:00 In fact, I love the first couple of verses 22:02 in Genesis Chapter 45. 22:04 Notice what it says here of Genesis 45:1-2, 22:07 it says "The Joseph could not restrain himself 22:09 before all those who stood by him, 22:11 and he cried out, make everyone go out for me. 22:15 So no one stood with him 22:17 while Joseph made himself known to his brothers, 22:19 and he wept aloud 22:22 and the Egyptians 22:23 and the house of Pharaoh heard it." 22:25 You could just imagine the wailing, 22:27 you know, that just the heartbreak 22:29 but at the same time, 22:31 just the love pouring out from him 22:32 as he's so happy that his brothers have, 22:35 they're different, they've been changed 22:37 through this whole experience, 22:38 so much that I love these last few verses here. 22:41 I'm gonna read for this for my segment here. 22:43 This comes from Genesis 45:5-8. 22:46 Notice the emphasis 22:47 that Joseph places in this whole situation. 22:49 He could have been like, Oh, you know what? 22:51 You guys should have felt bad. 22:52 And you should feel bad about your situation, 22:54 because of what you've done to me, 22:56 but I've forgiven you. 22:57 You know, he kind of could have dramatized it like that. 23:00 But notice the emphasis he puts on the situation. 23:02 He places it on God, for a good reason here. 23:05 Notice what he says, 23:07 verse 5 of Genesis 45, 23:09 "But now do not therefore," 23:10 this is our, I think this is our memory text. 23:13 "But now do not therefore be grieved 23:14 or angry with yourself, 23:16 because you sold me here, 23:17 for God sent me before you to preserve life." 23:21 Notice how he's giving God the glory, 23:23 what Satan meant for bad he says God turned into good. 23:26 And notice how all this forgiveness 23:27 is bringing back a unification, 23:29 and it's coming back to the glory of God. 23:31 Verse 6, he says, 23:32 "For these two years, 23:34 the famine has been in the land. 23:35 And there are still five years in which there will be 23:36 neither plowing nor harvesting. 23:38 And God sent me," there it is again. 23:40 "And God sent me before you 23:42 to preserve prosperity for you in the earth 23:46 and to save your lives by a great deliverance. 23:48 So now it was, it was not you who sent me here, 23:52 but God, notice, 23:54 but God and He has made me a father to Pharaoh, 23:57 and lord of all his house, 23:58 and a ruler throughout all the land of Egypt." 24:01 I think through this what we ultimately can learn 24:03 in these closing moments I have, 24:05 I just want to emphasize the fact 24:06 that Joseph could have held a grudge 24:08 and that's exactly what the spirit of the enemy 24:09 would have done. 24:11 But through it all, 24:12 because he was led by the Spirit of God, 24:14 this brother kept the commandments of God 24:16 and he had the testimony of Jesus Christ. 24:18 And because of that he was led by the Spirit of God 24:20 and God led him 24:22 to ultimately forgive his brothers 24:23 who have done him wrong. 24:25 And he brought them back together 24:26 just as God intends for us. 24:27 Amen. 24:29 Thank you so much, Pastor Ryan, what an incredible story. 24:31 Don't go anywhere. We'll be right back. 24:38 Ever wish you could watch 24:40 a 3ABN Sabbath School Panel again, 24:42 or share it on Facebook, Instagram or Twitter? 24:45 Well, you can by visiting 3abnsabbathschoolpanel.com 24:50 A clean design makes it easy 24:52 to find the program you're looking for. 24:55 There are also links to the Adult Bible Study Guide 24:58 so you can follow along. 25:00 Sharing is easy. 25:01 Just click share and choose your favorite social media. 25:04 Share a link, save a life for eternity. 25:09 Welcome back to our study on the life of Joseph 25:11 as we look at forgiveness 25:13 and rest, relationships and healing. 25:15 We're gonna kick it over to Shelley 25:17 in Tuesday's lesson. 25:18 Oh, I love Tuesday's lesson the title is, 25:22 "Forgive and forget"? 25:25 What is forgiveness? 25:27 When we forgive, 25:29 does forgiveness justify the behavior of someone 25:33 who is seriously wrong? 25:35 Does, is forgiveness dependent 25:39 upon someone else's repentance? 25:42 One of the one with whom I'm really upset, 25:47 just doesn't deserve my forgiveness. 25:51 I believe that Jesus on the cross 25:54 gave us an example 25:56 of divine forgiveness. 25:59 He was suffering the most horrible, 26:03 humiliating death. 26:05 And yet, for those who put Him there, 26:08 He could say, 26:09 "Father forgive them, 26:10 for they don't know what they do." 26:12 Now, let's talk about 26:16 human to human forgiveness. 26:20 And the only way I can describe forgiveness is 26:24 to describe first what it is not. 26:29 You hear people say, oh, forgive and forget. 26:32 You know, we can't just blank out our memory. 26:35 Let's look at what forgiveness is not. 26:38 Forgiveness is not condoning the sin. 26:42 When you forgive someone, 26:44 you are not saying, "It's okay." 26:46 It doesn't justify their actions 26:49 or their behavior. 26:51 Forgiveness is not forgetting what happened. 26:56 Because if we forgot what happened, 26:59 would never learn from experience. 27:01 Forgiveness is not a guarantee 27:06 that the other person will change their behavior. 27:09 If the other person is unrepentant, 27:13 if they are unchanged, 27:15 then it's up to us 27:17 to change the rules of engagement. 27:20 We have to guard ourselves from repeated injury. 27:26 I know my sister had her first marriage 27:28 was an abusive relationship. 27:31 Her husband would continue to ask for her forgiveness, 27:35 she'd forgive him. 27:37 But they never went to counseling. 27:38 She never did anything about it. 27:40 And she was abused over and over. 27:42 So I want to tell you, 27:43 if you're in an abusive relationship, 27:46 remove yourself, 27:48 get some space from the abuser. 27:51 And you want to see fruits of repentance, 27:54 even though you forgive them. 27:55 Look for fruits of repentance before you return. 27:58 Forgiveness is not naively restoring trust. 28:04 Trust has to be earned. 28:07 Reconciliation is the goal of forgiveness, 28:13 but it cannot be assumed. 28:16 Forgiveness is not necessarily easy. 28:19 It's an act that requires I think God's strength. 28:24 It can be very difficult 28:28 to even forgive the first defense 28:30 if it's bad enough, 28:31 but when someone offends you repeatedly, 28:36 we have to have God's strength to forgive. 28:40 So let's look at what relational 28:45 human to human forgiveness is. 28:49 It's an intentional act 28:52 by the one who's been victimized. 28:54 Its releasing negative feelings, 28:58 releasing the hurts 28:59 and the emotions of anger, rage, 29:03 so that you don't become embittered. 29:07 God's love is the source of relational forgiveness. 29:12 He can help us see others 29:16 as the lost and suffering souls they are. 29:19 And you may say, 29:20 "Well, it's someone in the church 29:22 that is this person that spreading gossip." 29:25 So how can you say they're lost in suffering? 29:28 Let me tell you something, 29:29 just because they're in the church, 29:31 doesn't mean they're saved. 29:34 You know, there's the wheat and the tares. 29:37 It's true. 29:38 But God's love can help us understand 29:43 that their offense against us 29:47 is a result of their own sin nature. 29:51 So forgiveness is the essence of our faith. 29:56 I mean, truly, this is a choice 30:00 we are commanded to make. 30:03 It's a process. 30:05 Right. 30:06 Joseph had a choice. 30:08 He could either forgive his brothers 30:09 who sold him to slavery or not. 30:12 But even he offered them a second chance 30:18 to restore the relationship. 30:20 He did not dwell on past mistakes, did he? 30:24 For Christians, hear what I'm going to say, 30:27 forgiveness is a non-negotiable act of obedience. 30:32 It's good. 30:34 Matthew 18:21-22, 30:39 Peter comes to Jesus. 30:42 Matthew 18:21-22, he says, 30:45 "Lord, how often should I forgive someone 30:47 who sinned against me? 30:48 Seven times?" 30:50 Well, it sounded like to lot to him. 30:53 "Jesus said, 'No, seventy times seven.'" 30:57 Yeah. Wow. 30:59 Four hundred and ninety times that requires sin. 31:01 That's only by God's grace. 31:04 Relational forgiveness is releasing the injustice 31:10 and treating someone as if they have not wronged us. 31:13 It doesn't mean that there won't be consequences. 31:15 Listen to what I'm saying. 31:18 The reason I keep emphasizing 31:21 relational forgiveness, 31:24 is it is not legal forgiveness. 31:30 When we forgive somebody, 31:31 that doesn't mean that God has pardoned that sin. 31:35 They've still got to deal. 31:36 All sin is with God. 31:38 And they've still got to deal with that 31:41 and get it straight with God. 31:42 But what we are doing when we forgive, 31:47 is we're recognizing 31:49 that the consequences of behavior toward God 31:52 belong to Him. 31:54 It's not that the consequences are not up to us. 31:58 You're not surrendering to a person 32:00 when you forgive them. 32:02 You're surrendering to God, you're not doing them a favor. 32:06 As Jill said, unforgiveness, 32:11 when you forgive somebody, you're doing yourself a favor. 32:13 Unforgiveness is like drinking poison. 32:19 If I don't forgive Johnny, it's like I drink poison, 32:23 and think it's going to hurt him. 32:25 Well, that doesn't make a whole lot of sense, does it? 32:28 Poison pollutes our emotional life, 32:31 it pollutes our spiritual life. 32:34 Even the bitterness and the rage 32:38 and unforgiveness can, 32:40 it can touch our physical life, 32:43 it can cause us to be inflamed and be stress, 32:46 it can contribute to depression. 32:50 You, when you are holding on to unforgiveness, 32:54 you become frozen in time. 32:57 You're like in a time capsule, and you remain a victim. 33:01 So when you forgive, 33:04 it's like you're giving that up. 33:06 Right. That's true. 33:07 In Matthew 18:23-35, 33:10 there's a parable of an unforgiving slave, 33:13 and I'm just for sake of time going to go through it quickly. 33:17 Jesus tells this parable. 33:18 Man comes before his master, he has a huge debt, 33:22 he cannot pay this debt. 33:24 Without even asking for forgiveness, 33:27 the master gave him forgiveness. 33:30 He says, 33:31 "Don't worry, we're going to wipe your debt away." 33:34 The guy is excited. 33:36 Hallelujah. He goes out. 33:38 First person he runs into is another man 33:42 who owes him little bitty debt. 33:46 And he will and the guy is begging, 33:48 "Oh, please forgive me. I'll pay it." 33:50 But he's going to throw him into debtor's prison. 33:53 He will not forgive him, guess what? 33:55 The master finds out about it. 33:57 And he says, 33:59 "Oh, really? 34:00 And I forgave brother, so and so all that." 34:05 Guess what? 34:06 Grab him up, throw him in debtors' prison. 34:09 See, Jesus then comes back, and He tell us in 8, 34:15 Matthew 18:35, 34:16 "So My heavenly Father will do to you 34:18 if each of you, from your heart, 34:23 does not forgive his brother his trespasses." 34:26 Let me try to tell you a quick story. 34:28 I asked God many years ago, 34:31 for an illustration of forgiveness. 34:33 If you have a stream 34:35 that's coming down from the mountains 34:37 through the valley, 34:39 you anchor a wire on one side and on the other. 34:43 Guess what happens? 34:44 As trash comes down that mountain stream, 34:47 it begins to gather up around that wire 34:51 and like a beaver 34:52 would build a dam stick by stick 34:54 guess what? 34:55 That wire gets all jammed up, the water no longer flows. 35:00 Unforgiveness in your heart is like that little wire, 35:04 and things begin to build around it. 35:07 And you know what happened? 35:08 It blocks up the flow of the living water. 35:12 That's right. 35:14 Jesus tells us to forgive 35:16 because it's good for us. 35:18 Amen. 35:20 Praise the Lord. 35:21 We now move to Wednesday's part 35:22 and the title is "Making It Practical". 35:25 You know, I want to remind you that the lesson, 35:28 the whole quarter is entitled "Rest in Christ". 35:30 And this is what we're talking about here, 35:32 rest in Christ. 35:34 So, this lesson brings out something important, 35:37 it has been mentioned already. 35:39 It says, in order to forgive, 35:41 I must admit that I have been hurt. 35:44 And sometimes we do hold things in, 35:47 we bottle it inside, 35:48 and we don't want to let it go. 35:50 And it can consume us, it can be like poison, 35:53 as you have already heard. 35:55 Now, it's interesting 35:57 that we can look into the Psalms 35:58 and see that David was a person 36:01 that he expressed his feelings to the Lord. 36:04 I mean, you can even picture him 36:06 crying out to the Lord. 36:07 And I want to bring out to you one such occasion 36:10 in Psalm 13:1-2, 36:13 and I think a lot of us 36:15 can identify with this 36:16 because we have had our request with 36:18 before the Lord we're going through a situation. 36:21 And he begin, this begins in Psalm 13:1-2." 36:24 How long, O Lord? 36:27 Will You forget me forever? 36:30 How long will You hide Your face from me? 36:33 How long shall I take counsel in my soul, 36:36 having sorrow in my heart daily? 36:38 How long will my enemy be exalted over me?" 36:43 So it's healthy 36:44 to express our feelings to the Lord. 36:47 And, of course, like the Bible says, 36:51 be angry and sin not. 36:53 Because the Lord loves us, He knows what is best for us. 36:57 But you can express, 36:58 Lord, this is consuming, this is difficult for me. 37:01 But we should not weary ourselves 37:04 out of the hands of the Lord. 37:05 We should trust in the Lord, 37:06 because as you continue reading in Psalm 13, 37:09 in any of the psalms 37:10 where David he's expressing his sufferings, 37:14 it turns into a positive note, 37:16 but I will praise the Lord forever, 37:19 I will rejoice in my God always. 37:21 So take these as an example. 37:24 But I want to talk for a little bit about anger, 37:27 because Joseph could have, 37:29 he could have hold, held on to his anger. 37:31 I mean, his brothers, they tried to kill him. 37:34 I mean, who wouldn't be upset about that? 37:36 He had no idea what would happen to him, 37:39 but he placed himself in the hands of the Lord. 37:41 Amen. 37:42 And you can see that he was a person 37:44 developed into a man that trusted in the Lord 37:46 no matter what the situation 37:48 and chose to be faithful 37:50 amidst difficult times, difficult situations. 37:53 But I want to talk to you about anger 37:55 because it does cause great harm. 37:58 Instead of forgiving and you hold on to anger, 38:01 it can consume you. 38:03 And I want to bring something out that is, 38:06 you can go to psychologytoday.com 38:08 and see an article there about anger. 38:10 And it says that 38:12 anger is far more your enemy than your friend. 38:15 It harms your relationships, both professional and personal. 38:19 And it has been repeatedly shown 38:22 to damage your health and shorten your life. 38:27 There's a book written by Redford Williams, 38:31 he wrote a book called, "Anger Kills" 1993. 38:35 And he revealed some studies that have been done 38:39 about what anger does to us as humans. 38:44 And I want to point out three things 38:46 that is also brought out in another magazine, 38:48 another website, everydayhealth.com 38:50 Notice, an angry outburst puts your heart at great risk. 38:56 In two hours after an angry outburst, 38:59 the chance of having a heart attack doubles. 39:02 Wow. Oh, wow. 39:04 For two hours. 39:05 This was the statement by Dr. Chris Aiken, 39:09 who is an instructor in Clinical Psychiatry 39:12 at Wake Forest University School of Medicine. 39:15 Repressed anger. 39:16 Have you ever heard of repressed anger? 39:18 You're holding on to this anger, 39:20 I'm going to wait, 39:21 and the devil takes advantage of these things. 39:24 Now, there are some people that say, 39:26 "Oh, I'm from such and such a country, 39:27 it's in my nature." 39:29 And when you have that mentality, 39:32 the devil says, I've got this person, 39:34 I can just, you know, some people are quick tempered. 39:37 Very, very dangerous. 39:38 Now, what happened so to say, 39:40 one study found that people with anger proneness, 39:44 as a personality trait, 39:46 were at twice the risk of coronary disease 39:50 than their less angry peers. 39:53 So we got to let go of this anger. 39:55 We've got to deal with it in a constructive way, 39:58 not in a destructive way. 40:01 And according to everydayhealth.com 40:03 constructive anger is the kind 40:05 where you speak up directly to the person 40:07 that you're angry with, 40:09 and deal with the frustration in a problem-solving manner, 40:14 not in a, I'm going to get even to you. 40:16 I'm going to give you a piece of my mind, 40:19 I don't know if you've ever said, 40:20 I'm going to give him a piece of my mind. 40:22 I don't know how much mind you've got to give. 40:24 But it's very dangerous to be doing those things 40:27 because the devil, when you're angry, 40:29 and you don't place yourself in the hands of the Lord, 40:31 the devil can try to bring you to the point of committing sin, 40:35 or causing harm, either verbally, or physically, 40:39 emotionally as well to an individual. 40:43 And these people that have these, 40:47 the people that do express their anger 40:49 in a constructive manner, 40:50 the article says, 40:53 is not associated with heart disease, 40:55 and it's actually very normal, healthy emotion. 40:58 So they have done studies on the people 41:01 that do the destructive anger 41:03 and the people that do the constructive anger 41:05 and deal with the problem. 41:07 The Bible brings out in Hebrews Chapter, 41:09 no, Ephesians, Ephesians 4:26, 41:12 and I'm going to read verse 27. 41:15 "Be angry, and do not sin. 41:17 Do not let the sun go down on your wrath." 41:21 So this is what the Bible tells us, 41:23 and this is verse 27, 41:25 "Nor give place to the devil." 41:27 So when you're angry, be very careful. 41:29 Bring that anger to the Lord and say, "Lord, I'm angry," 41:33 express it, 41:34 "Lord, I'm angry, 41:35 help me to deal with this anger." 41:38 Because if you don't, 41:40 you're giving place to the devil 41:41 and it can become very, very dangerous for you. 41:43 That's right. 41:44 And so, another point is 41:47 anger ups your stroke risk. 41:50 One study found there was a three times 41:53 higher risk of having a stroke from a blood clot 41:56 due to the brain 41:57 or bleeding within the brain 41:59 during two hours after an angry outburst. 42:01 So they, there are these terrible, terrible dangers 42:04 that we have to look at. 42:06 And number three, 42:07 it weakens your immune system. 42:11 One study at Harvard University scientists found that 42:14 in healthy people 42:16 simply recalling an angry experience 42:19 from their past 42:20 caused a six-hour dip in levels of the antibody immunoglobulin, 42:27 immunoglobulin A, the cell, 42:30 the cells first line of defense against infection. 42:32 So it affects your health in so many different ways, 42:36 and affects your attitude, and it affects your well-being, 42:39 so we can learn from Jesus 42:42 as it has already been said, 42:44 Luke 23:34, 42:46 "Then Jesus said, 42:48 'Father, forgive them, 42:50 for they do not know what they do.'" 42:54 So let us learn from Jesus 42:56 because He is our great example. 42:59 Forgive. 43:00 Forgive and it will be better for us. 43:04 Romans 5:8, 43:05 "But God demonstrates His own love toward us 43:08 in that while we were still sinners, 43:10 Christ died for us." 43:12 God is so merciful, so kind. 43:15 And I want to take you to a statement 43:19 that I found that has been a blessing to me. 43:23 It's in Review and Herald, December 16, 1884. 43:26 If you need a copy of this, you're welcome to write. 43:29 Notice this. 43:30 "If there have been difficulties 43:32 between brethren and sisters, 43:34 if envy, malice, bitterness, 43:36 evil surmising have existed, 43:38 confess these sins not in a general way, 43:41 but go to your brethren and sisters personally, 43:45 be definite. 43:46 If you have committed one wrong and they 20, 43:50 confess that one as though you were the chief offender, 43:54 take them by the hand, let your heart soften 43:57 under the influence of the Spirit of God and say, 44:01 'Will you forgive me? 44:03 I have not felt right overdue. 44:05 I want to make right every wrong 44:08 that not may stand registered against me 44:12 in the books of heaven. 44:13 I must have a clean record. 44:15 Who, think you," 44:17 it says here 44:18 "would withstand such a movement as this. 44:22 There's too much coldness and indifference, 44:24 too much of the I don't care spirit 44:26 exercised among professed followers of Christ. 44:29 All should feel a care for one another, 44:33 jealously guarding each other's interests, 44:37 love one another, 44:38 then we should stand a strong wall 44:41 against Satan's devices.'" 44:44 So this is a powerful statement 44:46 again Review and Herald, December 16, 1884. 44:49 Forgive, forgive. 44:52 It is difficult to do sometimes. 44:54 Sometimes we have been so hurt. 44:57 It's like a knife has been driven into our heart, 45:01 but by the grace of God coming to the Lord, 45:03 asking Him teach me to forgive, as you forgive me. 45:08 Thank you so much. 45:09 That's great medical advice 45:11 about how unforgiveness affects us 45:13 physically, mentally. 45:15 Now I want to, I want to go on a little different direction, 45:17 because a lot of times when you hear the word abuse, 45:19 we naturally think a woman is being abused. 45:23 But there are no women being abused in the story. 45:25 It's Joseph and his brothers. 45:26 Yeah, that's right. 45:28 And 85% of abuse does take place on women, 45:30 but 15% of abuse happens to men. 45:34 And in this story, it's Joseph and his brothers, 45:37 and there are various types of abuse. 45:39 Naturally, when we hear the word abuse, 45:41 we think right away physical abuse, 45:42 that's the most common, 45:43 but there's sexual abuse, 45:45 there's the verbal that impacts us emotionally. 45:48 There's the mental abuse 45:49 that impacts us psychologically, 45:51 you talked about that. 45:52 And there's the financial abuse that affects us economically. 45:56 And there's the cultural abuse that affects our identity. 46:00 A lot of young boys have grown up. 46:02 And I'm going to say this in reality, 46:04 have grown up without a proper image of a man, 46:07 and have been in an abusive environment. 46:08 And they turn and they grew up not knowing how to be a man. 46:11 And in some of those cases, this is not the default. 46:14 But in some of those cases, 46:15 they end up choosing a gay lifestyle. 46:17 But in many of those cases, 46:19 which we've known amongst some of the people 46:20 that have talked about 46:22 how God has freed them from that, 46:23 they had to establish 46:25 a proper image of the forgiveness, 46:28 and the restoration, 46:30 and God correcting their view 46:32 of what it means to be forgiven and to be restored. 46:35 So we're not just talking about forgiveness in the sense of, 46:38 well, that's going to be the end all that end all. 46:40 But I did, and remember, we did a two-hour live, 46:43 Jill and Greg, my wife and I did a two hour live 46:47 called More Powerful than Forgiveness. 46:49 And I would recommend you check that out on YouTube. 46:52 I don't often make plugs like that. 46:53 But there is something that is more powerful than forgiveness. 46:56 And I want to talk about that today. 46:58 But there's some observations 46:59 and I'm going to first talk about the steps of forgiveness, 47:02 because forgiveness done correctly 47:05 causes you to grow at every step. 47:09 But forgiveness is not something 47:11 that you run to do right away on the heels of the offense. 47:14 But as Pastor John Dinzey just said, 47:17 the longer you delay the process of forgiveness, 47:20 the longer you victimize yourself also, 47:24 because as Shelley and Jill said, 47:26 it's like taking poison, 47:28 in that illustration is clearly pointed out. 47:31 I called lack of forgiveness, like dragging around trash, 47:36 I call it a trailer trash. 47:38 Our lives are filled with trash and a lot of that trash 47:41 is we have not resolved the issues of our past 47:43 in the area of forgiveness. 47:46 First step in forgiveness, personal confession. 47:51 Admit your guilt, 47:52 and your part in the transgression. 47:54 1 John 1:9, 47:56 "If we confess our sins, 47:57 He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins 48:00 and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." 48:02 That's a forgiveness that's not between 48:04 you and another person. 48:05 But something you have done 48:07 that directly affects your relationship with God. 48:09 Because if I've offended someone, I can't say, 48:11 "Father, forgive me, 48:13 but I'm not going to say anything to them." 48:14 That relationship is still broken. 48:16 Right. 48:17 Which comes to the second type 48:18 of the second aspect of forgiveness, 48:20 personal repentance. 48:22 Acts 3:19, 48:23 "Repent therefore, and be converted, 48:25 that your sins may be blotted out. 48:27 So that times of refreshing may come 48:30 from the presence of the Lord." 48:32 Some people have never known refreshing 48:34 until they have followed the steps of forgiveness, 48:38 a burden lifted. 48:40 Man, it looks different today. 48:42 Wow, last night was tough. 48:43 But I feel so much better today. 48:45 I can now move on. 48:47 And so many you have never had that 48:49 refreshing from the presence of the Lord. 48:51 That doesn't mean when Jesus comes 48:53 that mean He can do that now. 48:55 The third one, forgive each other. 48:57 Colossians 3:13, 48:59 "Bearing with one another and forgiving one another. 49:02 If anyone has a complaint against another, 49:06 even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do." 49:11 That's a Christian obligation. 49:13 And there's a second part of that 49:15 in the forgiving each other. 49:16 Ephesians 4:32. 49:19 "And be kind to one another, tender-hearted, 49:22 forgiving one another 49:24 even as God in Christ forgave you." 49:28 Now, this requires the right attitude. 49:31 You can't go to somebody and say, 49:33 "I forgive you. 49:35 You don't forgive me when you're going to do it? 49:37 Hurry up." 49:38 I mean, I'm just over exaggerating, 49:40 but forgiveness is not something demanded 49:42 until the heart is transformed, it is an act of futility, 49:46 because intellectual forgiveness 49:48 does not bring about a transformation in the heart 49:52 and the other person will sense that. 49:54 Until you are tender-hearted, 49:56 until your forgiveness accompany 49:58 is accompanied with compassion, 50:00 then that forgiveness 50:02 should not even have happened at all, 50:04 it's not going to go anywhere. 50:05 The third part about is use a peaceful approach. 50:09 Hebrews 12:14, when you pursue forgiveness, 50:13 use a peaceful approach. 50:15 "Pursue peace with all people and holiness, 50:18 without which no one will see the Lord." 50:21 When you walk up to a person to say, 50:22 you know what? 50:24 This has been on my heart for a long time, 50:26 do it peacefully. 50:28 Peace is an evidence 50:30 that the Prince of Peace is operating in you 50:32 and through you. 50:34 Use a peaceful approach. 50:37 The other part, Luke 17:3 explain the offense. 50:42 Never say if I've offended you. 50:45 Well, then don't even mention it. 50:47 If you don't know what you've done, 50:48 don't even ask for forgiveness. 50:50 Admit what you've done. 50:51 Luke 17:3, 50:53 "Take heed to yourself. 50:56 If your brother sins against you rebuke him, 50:58 and if he repents, forgive him." 51:00 Now, let me make a point about this rebuke. 51:03 Don't rebuke him like God rebukes a person 51:05 that has no hope, 51:07 rebuke in the tender-hearted way. 51:09 When you look at the examples of Jesus rebuking, 51:12 look at what He said to the woman 51:13 caught in adultery. 51:14 He didn't say, "Well, I forgive you." 51:17 He said, "Go and sin no more." 51:19 Let's make sure that this doesn't happen again. 51:22 And we will both do our part 51:24 to secure that this is a lasting forgiveness. 51:28 The rebuke does not come from a heart of a judgment, 51:30 a judgmental person, 51:33 but from the heart of a person 51:34 who is occupied by the Spirit of Christ. 51:38 That has to come from prayer and asking God to get you ready 51:41 for that powerful act of forgiveness. 51:44 The other one is caution. 51:47 Forgiveness is not reconciliation. 51:50 That's right. Yeah. 51:52 Luke 23:34. 51:54 "Jesus said, 'Father forgive them, 51:56 for they do not know what they do.'" 51:58 And they divided His garments and cast lots. 52:01 If forgiveness was reconciliation, 52:03 then when Jesus forgave those who persecuted, 52:06 he would have been reconciled to them. 52:07 But that was not reconciliation, 52:09 because they didn't even know what they did. 52:12 So there was no reconciliation. Here's the point. 52:14 Forgiveness does not require two people, 52:16 but reconciliation does. 52:19 Mutual agreement on both parties 52:21 that we need to work this out. 52:23 And then the Lord can work on both of them together. 52:26 Here are the four steps of reconciliation very quickly. 52:29 First of all, realization. 52:31 The realization is an awareness that there isn't a grievance, 52:36 and an acknowledgement that there is a problem. 52:39 Both parties have to come to that conclusion. 52:41 If you say that there's a problem, 52:43 other person says what are you talking about? 52:45 Well, you're not going to have reconciliation. 52:48 Here's where that comes in realization. 52:50 Proverbs 28:13. 52:52 "He who covers his sin will not prosper. 52:54 But whoever confesses and forsakes 52:57 them will have mercy." 52:58 From realization, we go through identification, 53:01 empathizing and understanding the grievance. 53:04 Explain that. 53:06 How did I offend you? What did I do? 53:08 Make it clear 53:09 so that when the reconciliation happens, 53:11 you know on what basis 53:13 that reconciliation has occurred. 53:16 Be very specific about what has happened, 53:18 because generalization. 53:20 People might say, 53:21 "Oh, I don't know what we talked about that. 53:23 But I guess we're okay." 53:24 Be specific, but be prayerful as you be specific. 53:28 Third thing right, realization, identification, 53:31 then preparation. 53:32 Preparation, Romans 12:18, 53:35 "If it is possible, as much as depends on you, 53:41 live peaceably with all men." 53:44 That's preparation. 53:45 Make it a personal endeavor on your part. 53:48 Now, other people may not be peaceable. 53:50 But that does not take you off the hook 53:52 that God has caused you 53:53 to be responsible for peacefulness, 53:56 as far as it is possible with you. 53:58 And then fourthly, activation. 54:00 We start with realization, identification, preparation, 54:04 and then activation. 54:06 What does that mean? 54:08 You got to put it into practice. 54:10 Do what you must to bring reconciliation. 54:14 James 5:16, 54:16 "Confess your trespasses to one another, 54:19 and pray for one another, that you may be healed. 54:23 The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man 54:25 avails much." 54:26 And lastly, 54:28 reconciliation is not required on the part of the offender. 54:33 But reconciliation is required on the part of the offendee. 54:36 Matthew 5:23. 54:39 "If you bring your gift to the altar, 54:41 and there remember that 54:42 your brother has something against you, 54:44 leave your gift there before the altar, 54:47 and go your way. 54:48 First, be reconciled to your brother 54:50 and then come and offer your gift." 54:52 Reconciliation starts with the person 54:54 that was offended, 54:56 not with the offender. 54:57 Because they may avoid you the rest of their lives. 55:00 But when you pursue them, 55:02 then your gift is accepted by God. 55:05 Can I read a short quote very quickly? 55:07 Desire of Ages, page 310 powerful. 55:10 "Many are zealous in religious service, 55:11 while between them 55:13 that their brethren are unhappy differences, 55:14 which they might reconcile. 55:16 God requires them to do so in all their power 55:19 to restore harmony. 55:21 Until they do this, He cannot accept their service. 55:25 The Christian's duty in this matter 55:28 is clearly pointed out." 55:29 If you don't reconcile, 55:31 and you leave these injuries 55:32 between you and your brother and just say, 55:34 "I'm going to serve the Lord" and ignore it. 55:36 He says, 55:37 "Wait a minute, I don't accept that kind of service. 55:38 Fix it. And then I accept your gift." 55:41 Amen. What a powerful study. 55:43 We all need it, I need it, forgiveness, reconciliation. 55:47 Thank you all so much. 55:48 We'll start with Pastor Ryan, 55:50 and just share a closing thought. 55:51 Yeah, you know, as we were studying through this, 55:53 my mind was brought 55:54 to the very last words that Steven spoke, 55:57 and that was as he was being stoned. 55:59 It says, he knelt down 56:01 and cried out with a loud voice, 56:02 "Lord, do not charge them with this sin." 56:04 When he had said this, he fell asleep. 56:06 You know, who am I to expect God 56:09 to forgive me of my sins, 56:10 if I can't forgive others. 56:12 If He can forgive me 56:13 of all the horrible things I've said and done, 56:15 then surely if I'm full of the Holy Spirit, 56:17 I can also forgive others 56:18 for the things that they've done to me. 56:21 If you find that you're having difficulty 56:23 forgiving someone, 56:26 pray for their salvation, pray for them. 56:28 And you will be amazed 56:30 how that will change your perhaps 56:33 the offender has already passed on. 56:37 Well, just don't remain encapsulated 56:43 in that time capsule. 56:45 Forgive them 56:46 and you'll no longer be a victim. 56:47 Thank you so much. 56:49 Luke 6:37, is all that I will say, 56:52 "Judge not, 56:53 and you shall not be judged. 56:55 Condemn not and you shall not be condemned. 56:56 Forgive, and you will be forgiven." 57:00 In short, don't require more of others 57:04 than Jesus requires of you. 57:08 Amen. Amen. 57:09 Thank you so much, Pastor John, Pastor Johnny, 57:11 Shelley, and Pastor Ryan. 57:13 What an incredible study. 57:14 I want to leave you with closing scripture 57:16 of Romans 15. 57:18 We're going to pick it up in verse 5. 57:20 "Now may the God of patience and comfort 57:23 grant you to be like minded toward one another, 57:26 according to Christ Jesus, 57:28 that you may with one mind and one mouth, 57:30 glorify God the Father." 57:32 I want to encourage you, 57:34 we are brothers and sisters in Jesus. 57:37 If you have odd against someone, 57:39 go to that person, seek forgiveness, 57:42 seek reconciliation 57:44 that Pastor John just talked about. 57:46 The Lord can restore our hearts, our homes, 57:49 our relationships, and our churches. 57:51 Join us next week for Free to Rest. |
Revised 2021-08-12