Participants:
Series Code: STW
Program Code: STW180004A
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00:21 Welcome again, my friends, to Secrets to Wellness.
00:26 And when you put these secrets into practice, 00:29 you can live longer, healthier and happier. 00:32 So I hope that you've been incorporating them 00:34 into your lifestyle and at least getting eight, 00:39 eight ounce glasses of water a day, 00:41 and then walking 30 minutes for five times a week, 00:46 and you will truly feel better, and live longer, 00:50 and be happier. 00:52 And so, we've discussed 00:53 our secrets of water and exercise, 00:58 and now we're going to our third one which is love. 01:02 And loving relationships 01:04 are part of a healthy lifestyle, 01:07 and so we need to incorporate love 01:10 in order to really be healthy 01:13 and have the physical, the mental, 01:15 and the spiritual all combined. 01:18 So first question is, what is love? 01:21 Well, the dictionary puts it this way, 01:24 "Love is a profoundly tender, 01:27 passionate affection for another person, 01:30 a feeling of warm personal attachment 01:32 or deep affection, 01:34 as for a parent, a child, or a friend." 01:37 So it's a lot of a tender love toward another person. 01:42 It could also be put this way 01:45 that love is a commitment to always unselfishly seek 01:50 the very best for others. 01:52 And that's what love does, 01:54 that's what unconditional love does, 01:56 it seeks the very best for someone else. 02:00 And so it's a choice, it's a choice, my friends, 02:04 to treat them with kindness, 02:06 respect and graciousness 02:08 in spite of their attitudes toward us. 02:11 So when others don't treat us very well, 02:13 we can still take the high road and treat them with tender, 02:17 compassionate, unconditional love, 02:21 because love is a continual choice 02:24 to treat others in the way 02:25 that we would like to be treated. 02:28 In fact, we are told, "Do unto others 02:30 as you would have others do unto you." 02:33 So we want to always make that continual choice 02:37 to treat others like we would like to be treated. 02:40 And love considers the needs of others before our own needs, 02:45 and that often happens in the life of a mother. 02:48 Now, I'm a mother of three children 02:50 and five grandchildren, 02:52 and I know that you have to put their needs 02:55 before your own needs. 02:57 And so we can actually think about what are their needs, 03:01 their need for not only care and love, 03:04 but we have to feed them, we have to bathe them, 03:07 we have to do all these things 03:09 that help them to grow and flourish. 03:15 And although positive feelings 03:17 certainly are one aspect of love, 03:19 true love is not dependent on our feelings. 03:22 It's not whether we're feeling good one day, 03:25 my friends, or feeling good another day, 03:28 and then we're up and down. 03:30 Our feelings... 03:32 We're not to go by our feelings in the way 03:35 that we treat other people. 03:37 Dean Ornish, 03:39 medical doctor, founder, and president 03:41 of the Preventive Medicine Institute 03:43 in Sausalito, California, stated it this way, 03:48 "Love and intimacy are at a root 03:51 of what makes us sick and what makes us well, 03:54 what causes sadness and what brings happiness, 03:57 what makes us suffer and what leads to healing. 04:01 If a new drug had the same impact virtually 04:04 every doctor in the country 04:06 would be recommending it for their patients." 04:10 And so what Dr. Ornish is saying 04:14 is that love and intimacy 04:16 are so connected to our health, 04:19 whether we're sad or whether we're happy 04:22 that if there were a drug, if there was a medication 04:26 or a pill that we could give someone, 04:29 we would actually have everybody recommending it. 04:33 And then he goes on to say, 04:35 "It would be malpractice not to prescribe it, 04:38 yet, with very few exceptions, we doctors with few exceptions, 04:43 we doctors do not learn much 04:45 about the healing power of love, intimacy, 04:48 and transformation in our medical training." 04:51 And so Dr. Ornish says, 04:53 "It would actually be malpractice 04:55 if we didn't prescribed this, 04:57 if we knew there was a medication 04:59 for love and intimacy, that's how important it is, 05:04 and how much it is connected to our health. 05:07 You see, love has unusual healing power. 05:11 And studies, new documented scientific studies are proving 05:16 the fact that love heals. 05:19 ABC News, May 21, 2015 reported 05:24 that medical research indicates 05:26 that loving relationships help to reduce blood pressure 05:30 and the risk of coronary heart disease. 05:33 Amazing, my friends, 05:35 the very chronic diseases that we've been talking about 05:39 that are so plaguing our world today, 05:42 actually research shows that loving relationships can 05:46 actually reduce those diseases. 05:49 I want to have that love in my heart, don't you? 05:53 The healing properties of love transform physical 05:58 as well as emotional health. 06:03 And so, these are healing properties of love, 06:07 my friends. 06:09 Seventy five years 06:10 in the making Harvard University 06:13 just released its epic study on what men need 06:17 to live a happy life. 06:19 In 1938, this study started in 1938, 06:23 Harvard University began 06:26 a Grant Study of adult development 06:28 with 268 men charted over 75 years 06:33 starting with undergraduate days 06:35 and following them into their 90's. 06:38 So they started this study while they were in college 06:42 and followed them all the way through their 90's 06:45 when it took 75 years. 06:48 And in Triumphs of Experience, George Valiant, 06:51 the studies' director, 06:53 raises a number of factors more often than others, 06:57 but the one he refers to the most is this, 07:01 the powerful correlation between 07:04 the warmth of your relationships 07:06 and your health and happiness in later years. 07:10 So your health and happiness 07:12 in later years is directly connected 07:15 to the warmth of your relationships. 07:17 In other words, when you have good relationships 07:20 with your children 07:21 or your grandchildren when they're young, 07:24 and then when you get older, 07:26 this is directly related to how you have health 07:30 in your latter days. 07:32 And so, the number one, 07:34 most important finding from the Grant Study is this: 07:37 The 75 years and $20 million expended 07:41 on the Grant Study points 07:43 to a straightforward five-word conclusion. 07:47 So it took, my friends, 07:49 75 years and $20 million to do 07:54 this study to find out five simple words. 07:58 I want to know what those are, don't you? 08:00 Five simple words and it's this, 08:03 "Happiness is love." 08:06 End of story. 08:08 Happiness is love and love is happiness. 08:12 In other words, that's the end of the story. 08:15 We are happy when we love 08:18 and love brings happiness. 08:22 And so love nurtured 08:24 in the context of positive relationships 08:27 makes a difference in our physical, 08:30 in our mental, our emotional, 08:32 and our spiritual health. 08:36 So let's look at some health principles, 08:38 some simple health principles. 08:40 One is, if you want to be healthy, 08:43 invest in developing healthy relationships. 08:47 Healthy relationships actually help 08:50 our physical health, 08:52 and then relationships developed 08:54 in the context of a loving church environment 08:57 reduce the risk of mortality 08:59 and actually increase life's happiness. 09:03 And so, those people that go to church, 09:06 those people that have a loving church environment 09:11 actually have been known 09:13 to have greater health than those 09:15 who do not attend church. 09:18 So let's take a look at that. 09:19 A ten-year study by the Center for Aging Studies 09:23 at Flinders University 09:25 in Australia revealed that those 09:29 who have a "network of friends" 09:31 live 22% longer than those 09:35 who had few friends. 09:37 So that's why it's so important, my friends, 09:40 for you to have some very good friends, 09:42 because those relationships 09:45 actually make a difference in our physical health. 09:48 And so we want to develop those friendships, 09:50 so we can actually live 22% longer 09:54 if we have a network of friends. 09:56 So good friends, my friends, are good for your health. 10:01 The fewer your friends, 10:03 the more you internalize your problems, 10:05 and the more your health will suffer. 10:07 So there are times 10:09 when you need to confide in your friends, 10:12 and your best friend, maybe your spouse, 10:14 your best friend, maybe your children, 10:16 or your parents, or brother, or sister, 10:19 or someone else in the family, 10:21 or it may be someone that's your neighbor, 10:25 or a church member, but develop those friendships 10:28 because they are crucial for good health. 10:32 In fact, Jesus says in John 15:12, 10:37 "This is My commandment that you love one another 10:40 as I have loved you." 10:43 Jesus says, "I love you so much. 10:46 I died for you. I love you, I care for you. 10:49 And I want you to love others as I have loved you." 10:54 So let's look at some tips for building those love, 10:58 loving relationships. 10:59 We need to build those relationships, correct? 11:02 So let's take a look at them. 11:04 Well, the first one is to make time 11:08 for relationships. 11:10 We need to take time to build relationships 11:13 and relationships do take time, my friends. 11:16 I think of an experience that I had 11:18 when my son was only in the fifth grade, 11:22 and I was actually working on a seminar on priorities. 11:26 And my son was going on a camping trip, 11:31 and I thought, well, I'll get a lot done, 11:33 he's going to have a wonderful time, 11:35 he loves the outdoors, he loves nature, 11:38 he's going with his friends, 11:39 he's going to have a great time. 11:41 And he'll be tired 11:43 when he gets back so I can probably, 11:45 if I don't finish work on it again. 11:47 And so, the time passed 11:49 and soon my son was back at home, 11:53 and when he got home, 11:54 he started telling me about his wonderful trip 11:57 and then he said, mom, I would like you to go with me 12:01 around the lake with my dog. 12:03 Now, it takes about an hour to go around that lake. 12:07 We go up through the apple orchard 12:09 and around the lake and he said, 12:11 "Let's bring a ball and we can skip, and run, 12:14 and play, and throw the ball to the dog." 12:18 And I said, "Mark, are you sure, 12:19 aren't you tired?" 12:21 You've just come back from this trip. 12:23 He said, "No, Mom, I really want to go." 12:26 And so I said, "Okay," 12:27 because I knew 12:29 that this was another time to build 12:31 that solid relationship. 12:33 So I said, "Okay, let's get ready and go," 12:35 and so we did, and we got the dog, 12:38 and we started out, 12:39 and we were playing and running and throwing the ball, 12:42 and having a wonderful time. 12:43 And it took about an hour, and soon we got home. 12:47 And I thought, 12:48 "Well, he's surely going to be tired now 12:49 and I haven't finished my seminar" 12:52 although I loved the experience with him 12:55 and it was a wonderful time to build relationships. 12:58 When we got home, he said, "Mom, that was great, 13:03 but my friends are going swimming, 13:05 can you bring me to the pool?" 13:07 And he is... 13:08 And I said, "Mark, are you sure 13:10 that you want to go to the swimming pool. 13:12 Aren't you tired?" 13:13 "No, Mom, please bring me to the pool, 13:16 take me to the pool." 13:17 And so, I said, "Okay," 13:20 and we got in the car and, my friends, 13:23 he said something very significant 13:25 and it made me realize 13:27 how important these relationships really are. 13:30 We got in the car, 13:31 he was silent at first and then he said, 13:35 "Mom, you're a great mom." 13:38 And I thought, "What did he just say." 13:41 And I said, "Well, Mark, what do you mean? 13:44 What's a great mom?" 13:45 And he said something very significant 13:48 for a fifth grader, he said, 13:50 "A great mom is one who will take time 13:53 to build a relationship with his son. 13:55 And thank you so much 13:57 for taking me and my dog around there 13:59 and now you are going to take me to the pool. 14:02 Thank you so much." 14:03 And I thought after, 14:05 that seminar on priorities didn't matter to me anymore, 14:10 what mattered most 14:11 was that I had build a relationship, 14:13 and I can tell you to this day 14:16 we have a wonderful relationship 14:19 with our children, with our grandchildren. 14:21 They're adults now, 14:23 but we started building those relationships, 14:25 taking time for those relationships. 14:28 So, my friends, out there, those of you that are watching, 14:32 take time to build relationships 14:34 with your family, with your children, 14:37 with your spouse, with even your friends, 14:40 even church members and others, take that time and most of all, 14:44 take that time 14:46 to build relationships with Jesus. 14:49 That's the most important relationship 14:51 that we can have. 14:52 So make time for relationships 14:55 and then cultivate open communication. 14:57 We have open communication in our home with my husband, 15:02 with our children, and so now is the time to communicate 15:07 if you're not feeling well or if something bothers you, 15:10 then communicate it, don't keep it inside 15:13 because that's not good for your health, 15:15 but open up and communicate with one another, 15:19 cultivate that open communication, 15:21 very important. 15:22 And then focus on others, 15:24 not so much focusing on yourself 15:27 and your needs and my needs but on others. 15:30 And there are so many things 15:32 that we can do to make others happy. 15:34 I know that often times at the holidays, 15:37 we will bring just a simple loaf of bread 15:40 to some of our church members or some of our friends, 15:43 so just think of something little 15:46 that you can do for someone else 15:48 that will focus on the needs of others. 15:50 It may be just to go and mow someone's lawn 15:53 or to help someone else, 15:55 but focus on others and then speak kindly. 15:59 You know, especially as people get older, 16:02 they want just a smile sometimes, 16:06 just a kind word just, 16:08 you know, just something that will cheer them up 16:11 and so speak kindly to others 16:15 and then think before acting. 16:18 You know, oftentimes we say things 16:20 that we wish we hadn't said 16:22 and because we were maybe tired, 16:24 we haven't gotten enough sleep the night before, 16:28 and we don't really think before we speak, 16:31 and then when we get up the next day, 16:34 we say, well, I should have waited 16:36 and not spoken so quickly. 16:38 So we need to think before we act. 16:41 Researchers, my friends, 16:43 at Ohio State and Carnegie-Melon University 16:47 have shown that people 16:49 who report having strong relationships 16:51 have more robust immune systems 16:54 and are less likely to succumb to infectious diseases. 16:58 Just having those simple relationships 17:02 is going to build your immune system, 17:04 and we need a strong immune system 17:07 if we're going to live longer, healthier and happier. 17:11 And John Donne put it well 17:13 in his famous poem when he said, 17:15 "No man is an island, no man stands alone." 17:20 We all need support at times 17:22 and we all need support from someone else 17:26 and we need at times someone to carry us. 17:31 And so, I'd like to tell you about Boys' Town. 17:34 Boys' Town is a home 17:36 for homeless boys in Omaha, Nebraska. 17:40 And it's a haven of refuge revealing God's love 17:45 to these boys, love for one another. 17:48 And there's a statue outside the Boys' Town 17:52 and it says this, 17:54 "He ain't heavy, he's my brother." 17:57 And this has become the slogan for Boys' Town. 18:01 And you know what? 18:02 You can say the same thing, my friends, he ain't heavy, 18:06 he's my brother. 18:07 It's not difficult for me to do a kind deed for someone else 18:11 because you have these loving relationships. 18:15 Loving relationships will help, 18:18 will go so far and the founder believed at Boys' Town 18:22 that there are no bad boys, 18:25 there are just bad environments and social conditions 18:29 and you know, children have very soft 18:32 and tender hearts. 18:33 I know, I taught grades five through eight early in my life, 18:39 and I know that these children are very tender 18:44 and they have just hearts that long for that love. 18:50 And so there are no bad boys, 18:52 just bad environments and social conditions, 18:54 so we can change that for sure, 18:58 and the founder also believed 19:01 that love can change any life, 19:04 so you can change someone's life 19:06 even by a loving relationship or a smile. 19:11 In Psychology Today, 19:13 May 22, 2013, Cynthia Thaik said this, 19:18 "When individuals sense that they are loved, cared for, 19:22 needed and wanted, 19:24 the power of love releases positive chemical endorphins 19:28 in the brain which brings healing 19:30 to the mind and to the body." 19:33 So when people sense that they are loved, 19:36 this actually increases the endorphins 19:39 so that they actually have in the brain 19:43 healing of both mind and body. 19:46 And Pastor Arthur Ward said this, 19:49 "Flatter me, and I may not believe you. 19:52 Criticize me, and I may not like you. 19:55 Ignore me, and I may not forgive you. 19:57 Encourage me, and I will not forget you, 20:01 but love me 20:02 and I may be forced to love you. 20:05 Love generates love, my friends. 20:07 And so as we love someone else, they will love us back. 20:12 So in order to have friends, 20:14 we must prove ourselves friendly. 20:17 And Bernie Siegel said this, 20:20 "Unconditional love is the most powerful stimulant 20:24 of the immune system. 20:26 The truth is, my friends, is that love heals. 20:29 So love is part of those eight secrets 20:34 that we're talking about, so important. 20:37 Unconditional love even flows from the heart of God. 20:42 Health is directly related to understanding God's love 20:46 and revealing that love to others. 20:49 So God has unconditional love for you, my friends. 20:53 He loves you unconditionally and our health improves 20:56 when we trust in God's conditional love. 21:00 So if you're experiencing even bad health 21:03 because of thinking 21:05 that nobody loves you, just remember, 21:08 that God has unconditional love for you. 21:11 In fact, 1 John 4:8 says this, "God is love." 21:16 God is a loving God. 21:19 He created this earth for us with all its beauty 21:23 because He loves us so much and God Himself is love. 21:28 1 John 3:1 says, "Behold, what manner of love 21:32 the Father has bestowed on us, 21:35 that we should be called children of God." 21:38 We are children of God, my friends. 21:41 We're not just nobody, we are somebody, 21:45 we are the children of the Heavenly Father 21:49 and of the Creator of the universe. 21:52 And love is a gift from God 21:54 that has wonderful healing power. 21:58 God's love is supplied unconditionally, 22:02 but I must take it in, 22:03 I must feed on it to be nourished by it. 22:06 You know what? 22:08 God's love is free, 22:09 we don't have to buy it, my friends. 22:11 We don't have to purchase it. We don't have to beg for it. 22:15 We have it unconditionally because God loves you. 22:19 And I want you to know, 22:21 if you're out there watching this program today 22:24 that God loves you. 22:26 If you're feeling like nobody loves you, just remember, 22:29 God loves you unconditionally. 22:33 And loving God 22:34 and the people around us is life giving. 22:37 One of the most familiar Bible passages says this, 22:40 John 3:16, and if you're out there 22:43 watching this program, why don't you say it with me, 22:47 "For God so loved the world, 22:49 that He gave His only begotten Son, 22:52 that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, 22:57 but have everlasting life." 22:59 God wants to live with you throughout all eternity, 23:03 my friends, He loves you unconditionally. 23:06 And you know, we can follow these health principles 23:09 that we're talking about here on 3ABN, 23:12 and we can live longer, and healthier, and happier, 23:15 but God wants us to live throughout all eternity, 23:19 and so He says, my friends, I died for you, 23:22 I love you unconditionally. 23:24 And so remember, that God truly does love you. 23:29 Des Cummings in his book says this, 23:33 "God's love is the key that unlocks human potential. 23:38 His love transforms our lives. 23:41 It empowers us to rise above our challenges 23:44 and this loves helps to heal our wounds." 23:47 God's love, my friends, unlocks human potential. 23:52 When you know that you're being loved, 23:54 you can reach the highest sky, 23:56 you can reach to your highest level 23:59 when you know 24:00 that you are loved unconditionally. 24:02 And loving God and trusting God are closely related. 24:07 And health is improved when we trust, 24:09 trust in God's unconditional love. 24:13 He's interested in our wellbeing, 24:15 my friends, and He longs for us to experience life 24:18 in all His wonderful abundance. 24:21 So God wants you to experience life 24:24 to the fullest. 24:25 And trust, Isaiah 26:3 says, 24:29 "Trust in the Lord forever, for in Jehovah, 24:32 the Lord is everlasting strength." 24:35 So God wants us to trust Him. 24:38 Loving and trusting God leads us 24:41 from fear to faith, 24:43 so we go from fear and we have faith 24:46 that God does truly love us. 24:48 The more we love God, 24:50 the more we will learn to trust Him 24:52 and this trust, my friends, is called faith. 24:56 Faith is the assurance 24:57 that ultimately God will fulfill 25:00 all our dreams. 25:01 He will give you, my friends, the desires of your heart. 25:05 He wants to give you the desires of your heart, 25:07 but He will do what is best for you. 25:11 In the book Education, it says this, 25:14 "Faith is trusting God, believing that He loves us 25:18 and knows what is best for our good." 25:21 So faith is trusting God for: strength in our weakness, 25:25 for wisdom in our ignorance, for courage in our fear, 25:29 for peace in our anxiety, for hope in our depression, 25:34 for guidance in our doubt, and joy in our sorrow. 25:38 So, my friends, faith is trusting God 25:41 even if we feel weak 25:43 and even if we feel like we don't have the wisdom 25:46 that we want, God will strengthen us, 25:49 He will be with us, 25:51 so have that faith and trust God 25:54 because He's always there. 25:56 Faith is a relationship with God as a friend well known 26:00 which leads us to do whatever He asks and accept 26:03 whatever He allows with the absolute assurance 26:07 that He only wants what's best for our lives. 26:10 God wants what's best for us and well known universities, 26:13 national public health research institutions, 26:16 and privately funded health organizations 26:19 are all coming to the similar conclusions. 26:22 A strong belief can be a foundation 26:25 for improved health. 26:26 In fact, research shows 26:29 that on 1, 931 older adults 26:33 indicated that those 26:34 who attend religious services regularly 26:37 have a lower mortality rate, so find some church. 26:42 And research on 1,700 adults found 26:45 that those who attend religious services 26:48 were likely to have elevated levels 26:50 of interleukin-6, 26:52 an immune substance prevalent 26:54 in people with chronic diseases. 26:56 So just going to church, my friends, can help you. 26:59 "Courage, faith, hope, sympathy, love, 27:03 promote health and prolonging life." 27:07 My friends, I want you to know 27:09 that Jesus loves you unconditionally. 27:13 He loves you with an everlasting love, 27:16 and when you accept the fact that we can have courage, 27:21 faith, hope, sympathy, love that will promote your health 27:25 and you will truly have a longer life, 27:28 so God bless you 27:29 as you accept God's way of life. |
Revised 2019-03-07