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Series Code: TIJ
Program Code: TIJ004117S
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00:28 Did you know that we spend 70 to 80% of our day 00:33 in some form of communication? 00:35 and the main form of communication is speaking. 00:39 Yes, we speak around 20,000 words every day, 00:43 now that's a lot of words. But do you know the two words 00:48 that could make the biggest change in our lives? 00:52 Could it be Happy Birthday on your special day? 00:56 Or, I do when you marry the person you want to 01:00 share your life with. 01:01 Well, no, it's neither of these two words. 01:05 The two words that can make the biggest difference 01:08 just might surprise you. 01:10 You see, the two words that can make all the difference 01:14 are Thank you! 01:19 Peter Williams was a well educated lawyer 01:28 who should have had it all but instead 01:32 he was going through a very rough time. 01:34 His life was in a mess, his wife had just filed for divorce 01:38 and he had moved out of his expensive home into a 01:42 small apartment, he was quickly going broke 01:45 getting health issues and very miserable. 01:48 Although Peter owned his own legal firm in a big city 01:53 he had very little money left. Apart from the family situation, 01:58 one of his problems was that his clients weren't paying 02:01 their invoices on time and sometimes not even paying them 02:06 at all, he could barely afford to pay his employees. 02:10 Peter felt his life couldn't get any worse 02:15 so how did he get through these tough times? 02:19 What could he do? Well, one day he decided to get out of 02:24 the city and go for a bushwalk, as he was wandering along 02:30 the track reflecting on all the misery in his life 02:34 he had a lightbulb moment, he realized that he spent a lot 02:39 of his time complaining, a lot of time thinking 02:43 negative thoughts but very little time being thankful 02:47 for the things that he had. 02:49 Peter Williams decided to change his thoughts 02:54 and try to find things to be grateful for in his life. 02:57 He decided the most important people in his life were 03:01 his family. Somehow in his busy life he had lost some of the 03:06 connections he valued. 03:08 Did they know how important they were to him? 03:11 Well, Peter decided he needed to improve his communication 03:16 and connections with his family. Then he started writing 03:22 and sending thank you messages or emails to people in his 03:27 business who had worked hard for him. 03:29 He wrote to his friends who had stood beside him 03:31 and then to his clients who had trusted him. 03:35 He wrote to all the people he knew who had somehow 03:39 had a positive impact on his life. 03:43 Peter gradually found that his attitude was changing 03:48 as he found more reasons to be grateful he didn't have 03:52 as many negative thoughts. 03:53 He even found things right under his nose to be thankful for 03:58 that he hadn't even noticed. 04:00 With a positive attitude and perspective everything 04:04 in his life seemed brighter and he began to experience 04:08 how to be grateful when times are though. 04:11 So, here is one thing you can do that can dramatically improve 04:17 your significant relationships, make a difference in your career, 04:21 boost your energy and well- being, and help you feel 04:24 less stressed about your life. 04:27 So, join us to find out more about the impact these two words 04:33 can make in your life. 04:54 Scientific researchers show that it is not always the 04:59 big things that make the largest difference in life. 05:02 It's the little things, in fact these two words, "Thank You" 05:07 can make all the difference. 05:09 Research shows that Gratitude can: 05:23 Research also shows that grateful people also often have 05:28 better health. 05:37 Did you know that people who purposely express gratitude 05:42 report higher self-esteem and are more likely to help others 05:47 and so have greater happiness. Grateful people are more 05:52 optimistic and have a greater ability to deal with tough times 05:56 find greater joy in life, and are more generous with 06:00 their time and money. Are more forgiving and build better 06:03 relationships. So gratitude definitely has a positive effect 06:09 on our brains and on our characters. 06:12 There's a famous saying by the Indian sage Maharaja Gandhi 06:17 that explains this well. 06:44 These words are certainly powerful words of advice 06:49 they show that gratitude is a way of seeing the world. 06:53 It's a way that can change your life, so let's discuss this 06:58 further with someone who has done a lot of research 07:02 into these two words that really do show gratitude. 07:07 I have a special guest in the studio with me today 07:12 Don Macintosh has worked as a trauma nurse, a minister, 07:17 a counselor and as a teacher inspiring and empowering people 07:22 to get past negative thinking and make positive change 07:26 in their life by drawing on scientific insight and 07:29 spiritual inspiration. 07:32 Don Macintosh, welcome to our program today, 07:35 we're talking about gratitude. 07:38 Would you say most people are positive or negative 07:40 in their outlook on life? 07:42 Well we're talking about gratitude right, 07:44 they've actually done studies of people, 07:47 of how many thoughts they had their word. 07:49 There's a researcher out of Stanford University who thinks 07:52 that a normal person such as yourself would have about 07:57 60-70,000 thoughts a day. The problem is with those thoughts 08:01 is that most of them are negative thoughts about 90% 08:05 well actually most of them are repetitive thoughts I should say, 08:08 90% are repetition of the same thought. You're thinking of the 08:11 same thought again and again and 80% of those are negative 08:17 thoughts. So when you are walking down the street 08:20 most people are having the same thoughts again and again 08:22 and 80% of those thoughts are negative thoughts. 08:25 So, I would say most people are largely negative. 08:29 So what can people do about this cycle of negative thinking? 08:33 Well, first of all, they have to recognize that it's a problem 08:36 and then there needs to be an intervention. 08:37 You can't just let people go with their thoughts 08:41 90% of them being repetitive, and 80% being negative, 08:45 you got to intervene. There's a guy his name is Robert Emmons, 08:48 he's not too far from here down in University of California 08:51 Davis which is just down from where we are sitting today. 08:56 And Robert Emmons has done all kinds of research on gratitude 09:00 and gratitude interventions and what he's discovered is that 09:04 if you can get people to actu- ally take a gratitude journal 09:07 where they're actually physically writing out things 09:10 that they're grateful for, it has a powerful impact 09:14 on their health not only physically but also emotionally 09:18 and also mentally and you might even say spiritually. 09:22 If just once a week you are sitting down and saying 09:25 this is what I am grateful for and then you start listing 09:28 that and writing it out, it has a profound impact. 09:32 And then you can even increase it more by having a daily 09:38 gratitude journal. So you start to write it out daily 09:41 every day. Now when we do our depression recovery programs, 09:46 depression and anxiety recovery programs, I work with 09:49 Dr. Neil Nedley and we do these a number of times a year... 09:52 We actually on a sheet, on the bottom of a sheet every day 09:56 we have them list out their gratitude for what they are 10:00 grateful for. And this begins to change something in their 10:03 mind, they start to just totally look at things in a different 10:07 way and they actually recognize that they are going to have to 10:09 write something that they are grateful for and so they are 10:12 beginning to think about those things and it radically changes 10:16 who they are. 10:18 What are the rewards of gratitude? 10:21 Well, you know, when you look at the rewards of gratitude 10:24 they're can be physical aspects of gratitude... 10:28 If you are grateful for something you have this burst of energy, 10:33 you're suddenly looking at things you're thankful for, 10:35 you're not looking at things with that negative lens. 10:37 And then you are more forgiving, you have a...instead of driving 10:43 down the street and being angry about how a person is driving, 10:48 you're grateful that you didn't get hit. 10:50 It's a totally different mentality as you're going down 10:53 the street you're able to what we call reframe things. 10:57 So sometimes I have someone come in and I'm counseling with them 11:00 in the depression recovery anxiety thing and they tell me 11:04 all the things that are terrible about what happened... 11:06 I say well let's write those down, all these bad things 11:08 and okay, that's bad. But now this big box around the bad 11:13 and let's see what you are glad for. Because you see right now 11:17 you're focused on the bad. 11:18 What is it that you are glad for? 11:21 Even if the situation was a terrible situation 11:24 it was off...well that's bad but what's good? 11:28 Like there's a scripture that says, they meant it for evil 11:32 but I meant it for good says God, so there's a different picture, 11:37 something bad happened but what is it that you had 11:40 to be glad for? And they go what kind of an assignment 11:42 is that? And I say it's an assignment that's going to 11:44 get you out of the cycle, cause now when you think about that 11:48 event, you're going to start thinking about the things 11:50 that are good instead of the things that are bad. 11:52 And it's going to take all of that negative gall out of it 11:58 and you are going to be able to go on in your life as a 12:01 grateful person. 12:03 You know another thing that gratitude does is when you 12:07 start being grateful, you begin verbalizing it to other people 12:11 and guess what that does? 12:12 They want to hang out with you more, they want to have 12:15 a friendship with you. People like it when you recognize 12:19 and acknowledge things that they have done and things 12:21 that you're grateful for and they actually want to 12:24 be friends with you, so you actually, end up having more 12:26 friends from grateful people around them usually. 12:31 And then also they maintain those friendships over time 12:36 they kind of just draw on that. 12:39 You know another thing about grateful people is it's not 12:42 that they ignore the negative aspects of life, it's not like 12:46 they don't acknowledge that there's pain, there's suffering 12:49 there's agony, they know all about that, it's just that 12:51 they're able to reframe that and go forward and find things 12:57 to be grateful even in those negative situations. 13:01 So, they've done various studies where they do gratitude 13:05 interventions...they did this with Veterans and they helped 13:09 them reframe and what-not and after 21 days they 13:12 see improvements, physically, emotionally, mentally 13:14 and they are able to re-engage more. 13:17 So, this has actually become a science of gratitude. 13:22 Like for instance, we know that if someone is angry 13:26 certain areas of their brain light up or shut down. 13:30 For instance with anger, this area in the back of your brain, 13:33 the cerebellum begins to just shut down, Dr. Daniel Amen 13:37 who has a clinic not too far from here, 13:40 he looks at the brains and he can see that that just 13:43 shuts down. But when you have a grateful attitude 13:47 that area begins to light up... So again, this back section 13:51 of the brain, the cerebellum, is very big when it comes to 13:56 emotion control and gratitude control. 13:58 This is why exercise is so important, 14:01 you get out there, you're exercising, this section of your 14:03 brain begins to coordinate all of that and there is a 14:07 there is an ability to handle the thoughts and the emotions 14:11 more effectively and we see this when people come 14:14 with depression and anxiety many times they don't have any- 14:18 thing to be grateful for if you ask them. 14:21 Once they start getting better and they start exercising 14:23 they are able to control their thoughts, their emotions 14:26 more effectively and their actually able to share 14:30 more things that they are grateful for. 14:32 So, what is happening biochemically when we practice 14:36 gratitude? 14:37 Well, you know when someone is grateful, even their chemistry 14:41 changes. In the brain we have neurotransmitters 14:45 like for instance serotonin which is made from tryptophan 14:51 and hydroxytryptophan in the presence of sunlight 14:53 and green leafy vegetables then enters serotonin. 14:56 But gratitude actually increases serotonin production. 15:01 A lot of these anti-depressants are actually trying to conserve 15:04 those bio-chemicals in your brain 15:07 Gratitude stimulates the para- sympathetic system that enhances 15:11 dopamine, that's the system of rewards, we're like look I feel 15:15 rewarded when I am sharing a grateful thought 15:17 or when I have expressions of gratitude or other people 15:20 express gratitude to me and then also our serotonin 15:23 goes up so, the idea of praise and gratitude 15:27 even in music if you listening to certain types of music... 15:32 Music that is praising God or rejoicing and it's throughout 15:37 the scriptures like devotional music. 15:38 And if it's the right kind of music there's music that's 15:42 not so good for your brain and there is music that is better 15:44 but it's rigorous music that is logical in its composition 15:51 and its tones and it's not catching you unexpectedly. 15:55 Anyway, there is a whole science to the music that helps your 15:58 brain, but it actually consolidates and enhances 16:02 serotonin production. So I find it fascinating 16:05 that throughout the scriptures for instance, if you are a 16:10 Christian, you have all of these texts they say like 16:13 "Enter into His courts with thanksgiving" 16:16 and come in with praise. And throughout it's like 16:19 expressions of gratitude 150 different Psalms 16:23 which are basically focusing on that. 16:26 And then throughout the scriptures it has other texts 16:28 about this as well. So what did we say? 70% of our thoughts 16:33 It 60 to 70,000 thoughts what is it, 90% of them are 16:37 repetitive 80% of them are negative... 16:39 We need something to buffer that and something that can 16:43 come up against that, that can change the chemistry 16:46 and that is "Praise". 16:48 So, I want to remind people again that there's just a lot 16:53 of positive things about looking at book for instance the Psalms. 16:57 Now, you understand the Psalms, like there are five books 17:00 in the Psalms, right? Five books. 17:02 But there are also five books in the first five books of the 17:05 Bible, so-called Pentateuch. And these Psalms go right along 17:09 with the stories and it's like okay, I want to now sing about 17:14 how God delivered people in the past, how He can deliver 17:18 me right? Expressions of gratitude like for instance 17:21 when they came out of Israel and they were taken out of 17:26 captivity, they sang a song... I will sing unto the Lord for He 17:29 has triumphed gloriously, the horse and rider are thrown into 17:31 the sea. And they are just singing and praising, 17:34 their rejoicing and that expression of gratitude 17:36 is totally changing their brain chemistry. 17:41 How can we increase gratitude in our lives? 17:44 Ways to increase gratitude. 17:51 to answer that question but physically, we want to exercise, 17:54 we want to use our cerebellum, we get out there, we want to 17:57 walk, we want to jog, we want to do those things, 18:00 that's going to give us a grateful disposition just there. 18:04 So that's physical. 18:06 So emotionally, again that cerebellum, those emotions 18:11 are controlled when we are exercising. 18:14 But they are also controlled when we do things for instance 18:18 like focusing our thoughts on grateful things 18:23 or filled with gratitude. 18:24 You know, the Psalms, I like to take the Psalms with the 18:28 Proverbs and I ask three simple questions of anything 18:33 I am reading at any time but especially when I'm 18:36 reading the Psalms or the scriptures. 18:37 Number one is What is the problem here 18:40 that's being dealt with in this passage? 18:42 What kind of problem in life is it? 18:44 Is it anxiety, is it stress? What is it? 18:46 What is the solution that is being offered? 18:49 Okay, here is the solution. You need peace, you need joy. 18:52 But then, most importantly. What's the process of moving 18:55 from problem to solution? 18:57 And I just look at that and I say, what's that process 18:59 and then I try to say that's how I'm going to focus today. 19:03 That's what I am going to focus on today and it literally 19:06 lifts me out of depression and into joy 19:10 and from groveling to gratitude. Right. 19:13 Another big thing is prayer. For instance, prayer is a 19:17 form of meditative thought, I don't just say pray. 19:21 I might just take a passage and pray through and I'm focusing 19:25 my mind...But they have done studies on this and there's 19:27 been all kinds of studies since the year 2000 on prayer. 19:31 Especially here in America, used to never ever 19:33 get research money to use the word prayer, but now 19:36 there has been over 6,000 studies done because 19:39 they are seeing the power of it. 19:40 And they have discovered that the more you pray 19:43 actually the more grateful you are. 19:46 People pray sporadically are grateful sporadically. 19:49 People that pray every single day their gratitude goes up 19:50 and the impact of it is felt for weeks afterward, 19:57 four, five, six weeks afterward just through having that 20:02 discipline, daily discipline of prayer. 20:05 Is there a special message you have for our viewers today? 20:08 You know, we have covered a lot of things about gratitude 20:12 I guess my message for your viewers today is 20:15 don't forget any of it, do it often. 20:19 Exercise, get involved in mediation and prayer, 20:23 reframe things, the different things we have covered. 20:25 But probably I'm reminded of this famous person who 20:30 went through the Nazi time period in Germany and all the 20:35 atrocities, her name was Corrie ten Boom. 20:37 She and her sister were in a barracks where there were all 20:41 kinds of fleas, it was very miserable. 20:42 But the guards hated the fleas so they wouldn't come in. 20:46 And so she was sitting there one day saying, what do I have 20:49 to be grateful for? And Willem, her sister said we're grateful 20:52 for the fleas. These fleas are the best thing that ever 20:55 happened to us. The guards don't come in, they don't bother us. 20:57 You know, you might be in a horrible situation but 21:00 you need to look for that element that you can be 21:03 grateful for and then just praise God and rejoice 21:07 in that. It just takes a choice, it just doesn't just happen 21:11 you got to choose gratitude and there is always an angle 21:16 there's always something. 21:17 I remember this guy talking one day and his family was 21:20 always mean to him and one day they tried to play a prank 21:24 on him during the holidays and they said look we're going to 21:27 take this big box and we're going to put a bunch of 21:29 horse manure in it and so when he opens it, it just smells bad 21:33 and he gets it, he gets under the tree and he opens it up 21:36 and the smell is terrible and he goes, oh this is great 21:38 there's got to be a horse somewhere, you guys got me a 21:40 horse...You see, he saw the positive when they tried to send 21:45 a negative message. And this is the mindset we got to have, 21:49 we got to look for what we can be grateful for. 21:52 We need to choose, and this is the thing I want your viewers 21:55 to take...We need to Choose Gratitude! 21:58 We got 60/70,000 thoughts a day 90% of them are repetitive, 22:03 80% of them are negative, but we don't have to go with that 22:07 we can go with the 20%, expand it to 40%, expand it to 80%, 22:12 100% if we choose gratitude. 22:16 Don Mackintosh, we are grateful that you've been on our program 22:20 today, and we are particularly grateful that you've shared 22:24 the importance of gratitude. Well, I'm most grateful to be 22:28 with you and thank you for having me. 22:32 What amazing information, it seems so easy to choose to be 22:38 grateful and the best part is that it doesn't cost you 22:41 anything and yet it yields priceless results. 22:46 It's much more than just saying thanks, it's a way of seeing 22:50 the world around us that will help us be happy people 22:54 let's look for things we appreciate in our lives 22:58 and to say those two words that mean so much. 23:02 So why not start practicing gratitude with your family, 23:07 your friends, your colleagues, and people you meet. 23:11 Tell someone today how grateful you are they're in your life. 23:15 Here are just a few suggestions to help us all to be grateful. 23:20 Focus on the positive things in your life. 23:23 Be grateful for what you have rather than what you don't. 23:28 Tell people in your life some- thing that you appreciate 23:32 about them. 23:33 Be kind to everyone around you- hold a door for a stranger, 23:38 smile more and thank people for what they do for you. 23:42 Write a list of all the things you are grateful for. 23:45 And consider reading the Bible. 23:49 As our guest Don Macintosh said, the Bible can also give us 23:55 guidelines about being thankful to God. 23:58 When we practice gratefulness to God, it gets our eyes off 24:03 ourselves and helps us to focus back on what is important 24:07 is faith and trust in God. 24:10 It is during the time of crisis that we often turn to God 24:15 that's often when we recognize the existence of God 24:19 and that God is still in control of this world. 24:23 Here's a Bible passage about thanking God for His laugh, 24:28 His promises to care for us and supplying our needs. 24:40 We really do have so much to be thankful for in our lives 24:45 if we could fill our hearts with gratitude 24:48 then it will leave no room for negative thoughts or complaining 24:52 so why not give gratitude a go? You'll be thankful you did. 24:58 Would you like to improve your relationships? 25:03 Be more content in your career. Boost your energy and wellbeing. 25:07 and feel less stress and anxiety about your life. 25:10 If you would like to have this happier life, 25:14 then why not try adding simple words of gratitude 25:18 and see how it can help you get through tough times. 25:22 If you would like to know more about finding happiness, 25:27 then, I would like to recommend a Free Offer we have for all our 25:32 Incredible Journey viewers today. 25:34 It's a booklet called "Why Being Grateful is Important." 25:39 This book is our gift to you and is absolutely Free. 25:43 I guarantee there are no costs or obligations whatsoever. 25:47 So, make the most of this wonderful opportunity 25:51 to receive the gift we have for you today. 25:54 Phone or text us at 0436.333.555 or visit our website at TiJ.tv 26:04 to request today's Free offer and we'll send it to you 26:08 totally Free of charge and with no obligation. 26:11 So don't delay, phone or text us at0436.333.555 in Australia 26:18 or 020.422.2042 in New Zealand. 26:23 or visit our website TiJ.tv to request today's Free offer 26:29 and we'll send it to you totally free of charge and with no 26:32 obligation. Write to us at GPO Box 274, Sydney NSW 2001 26:39 Australia, or PO Box 76673 Manukau Auckland 2241 26:46 New Zealand. Don't delay, call or text us now. 26:56 If you've enjoyed today's program on gratitude, 26:59 and our reflections on the change these thoughts and words 27:03 can bring to our lives, then be sure to join us again next week 27:07 when we will share another of life's journeys together. 27:11 Until then, let's pray and thank God for His guidance, 27:15 protection, and blessings. 27:19 Dear Heavenly Father, We're so thankful for your love 27:23 and for the many blessings that you give us. 27:26 Thank you that you promised to never leave us or forsake us 27:30 and that you are able to bring us hope through even the 27:34 toughest times. We pray that you will help us to set our eyes 27:39 on you. In Jesus' name, we pray, Amen! |
Revised 2021-11-08