Participants:
Series Code: UBR
Program Code: UBR190004A
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00:01 As a woman,
00:02 do you often feel as though your life 00:04 is on the clearance shelf? 00:05 Are you going through a trial 00:06 that has knocked you to your knees? 00:08 Well, stay tuned to meet a woman 00:10 who will let you know that, through Christ, 00:13 you're not on clearance. 00:15 My name is Yvonne Lewis- Shelton, 00:17 and you're watching Urban Report. 00:41 Hello, and welcome to Urban Report. 00:43 My guest today is Vivian Martin, 00:46 radio host and author of "You're NOT On Clearance." 00:49 Welcome to Urban Report, Vivian. 00:52 Thank you. 00:53 I'm so happy to be here, Yvonne. 00:54 We're so glad that you could come 00:56 and share this transformational program 01:00 that you have with us. 01:02 Yes. 01:03 There are so many women and men, 01:05 but your book specifically addresses women, correct? 01:09 It was written with women in mind. 01:12 But since the book has been published 01:15 and it has sold more than 600 copies, 01:17 it has gone to women and men alike. 01:20 Okay, good. 01:22 Because everybody goes through stuff. 01:23 Yes. 01:24 Everybody has trials in their journey, 01:28 so everybody needs some help. 01:31 Absolutely. 01:32 Tell us about your journey. 01:34 What made you write this book? 01:36 Well, at this time and during the time of the book writing, 01:41 I'm a wife, I'm a mother, I'm a daughter, 01:45 I am the fifth daughter 01:47 of six girls born to my parents, 01:50 just your normal working woman, 01:53 Seventh-day Adventist Christian woman, 01:56 I'm a speaker, 01:59 and I reached a point in my life 02:01 that I would call a major crisis. 02:06 I was having a very huge crisis in my marriage. 02:10 And at the time,0 02:12 I did not realize what God was doing 02:16 and what all He was taking me through? 02:20 I didn't even realize that I had reached a point 02:22 where I felt like I was on clearance. 02:25 I didn't even know that until the Holy Spirit 02:27 shared it with me. 02:29 So it was about 10 years later when I actually wrote the book, 02:35 after the Lord had brought me through and to another side. 02:40 I continued to be a speaker for Him. 02:42 And I could just see women in the audience 02:46 with pink stickers all on their faces, 02:49 just all type of pink stickers and labels 02:53 where they had labeled themselves 02:55 on clearance 02:57 or where other people had placed the labels on them 03:01 and they were accepting it. 03:03 They believed it. 03:05 So I said, "I remember being there, 03:08 and you're not on clearance." 03:09 Yes. 03:11 "You are bought with a price, girl." 03:12 So I was just trying to think of some way 03:15 that I could get that across to the ladies. 03:19 And you did in such a really refreshing way in the book. 03:23 As I was reading it, 03:24 you know, there were areas that made me smile and say, 03:28 "Wow, this is really refreshing, 03:30 different..." 03:32 Your different spin if I may. 03:34 Right. The approach, the approach. 03:36 Yeah, on things was really very interesting. 03:39 And I feel, you know, Holy Spirit led. 03:43 So let's talk about... 03:44 Let's talk about the book and let's start 03:46 with the first chapter of the book. 03:48 Yes, yes. 03:49 Tell us what that is and what it's about. 03:52 Okay. 03:53 Well, the title is the same as the first chapter, 03:56 "You're Not On Clearance." 03:59 It's making a point that you're not marked down, 04:04 you're not reduced. 04:06 On the first chapter in the book, 04:08 one of the things I've written is said, 04:10 "Clearance items are often torn, 04:13 marked down, scattered, expired. 04:17 They have missing parts, faded packaging, 04:21 and are no longer worth the original value." 04:24 And if you think about it, Yvonne, when we go in a store, 04:27 where do you find the clearance items? 04:30 They're in the back. Back. 04:32 They're in the back, they're in the dark, 04:35 they're hidden in the corner. 04:37 And sometimes, 04:39 the item has several stickers on it 04:41 where they keep marking it down. 04:43 Come on. 04:44 And so when you are going through that time in your life, 04:46 when you feel like, "I'm in the back. 04:49 I'm in the dark. 04:51 I'm in the corner," 04:53 and people are coming from every direction, 04:56 putting labels on you, that is where I was. 05:01 It was approximately almost 20 years ago, 05:05 I was approaching my 20th year of marriage. 05:07 And this is the time 05:09 where you're going to celebrate, 05:11 you know, it's 20 years, 05:12 we've done this, we've done that, 05:14 we got the house, we got the two kids, 05:15 we got the dog, everything, working in the church. 05:19 And all of a sudden, 05:21 I'm faced with the reality 05:25 of unfaithfulness, 05:28 of a huge amount of infidelity in my marriage 05:33 that had taken place for many years 05:36 and that resulted with many children. 05:40 So immediately, 05:43 you start getting all these labels put on you. 05:45 Everybody has a sticker, everybody has a reason. 05:48 People want to know, "What happened? 05:50 What did you miss? 05:52 Why did you do this? 05:53 You don't have to stay. 05:54 You don't have to go." 05:56 And so this first chapter is saying that, first of all, 05:59 you're not on clearance. 06:02 I don't care how bad it is, 06:04 I don't care what has happened to you, 06:06 if you feel betrayed, if you feel lost, 06:09 if you feel that God had a part in it, 06:13 on the back of my book, 06:16 there's one part where I say that, 06:18 "I felt that God had manipulatively failed me." 06:23 I felt, "God, where were you?" 06:26 I'm sending my children to church school. 06:28 You know, I'm doing the whole thing, 06:30 as we like to say, 06:32 and we really shouldn't do that. 06:34 We shouldn't put a list before God 06:36 because as one of my chapters bring out, 06:39 "Lose the Belly Fat," 06:41 it lets you know that God was there all the time. 06:44 That's right. 06:45 That's right. All the time. 06:46 And God didn't force... 06:48 He didn't make that situation happen. 06:49 Absolutely. 06:51 You know, it happened because, 06:53 you know, your spouse was led into... 06:57 Absolutely. 06:58 You know, led himself into it or whatever. 07:00 But God did not lead him into it because God would not, 07:04 you know, do evil or force us to do anything wrong. 07:08 Absolutely. 07:09 But when you're in the froze of that, that whole situation, 07:15 you feel so undervalued. 07:18 I felt that God couldn't use me anymore. 07:22 You know, I felt that my trial was so piercing and, 07:27 spiritually, 07:28 that it has separated me from His love. 07:32 So you actually looked at... 07:37 Your relationship with God was actually a reflection 07:41 of where your marriage was, it seems. 07:43 Yes, yes, at that time, because, somehow, 07:47 I was already a speaker. 07:48 So I used to do a lot of speaking, 07:50 advocating for the Lord, 07:52 being there for other women, 07:55 but I never thought I would be that woman, you know? 08:01 Somehow I felt that I would be protected 08:05 from just certain trials in this life. 08:09 And so when I was hit with that, I just felt like, 08:12 "Oh, my God, 08:13 I can't go out there speaking for You anymore, Lord. 08:17 I can't even get my own home together." 08:20 I felt like there was no hope for my children. 08:23 I'm raising these children, but for what? 08:26 They're not going to be protected 08:28 from the pains of this life. 08:30 So you had anger toward God... 08:32 Yes. 08:34 For your situation, blaming Him for the situation. 08:37 A part of it. Yes. 08:38 A part of it at first. Yeah. 08:40 And I understand now that that's just what happens 08:43 when you're going through trauma. 08:44 You know, the different stages, the anger, the guilt, 08:47 the confusion, all of those stages, 08:50 but until it happens to you, 08:52 you don't realize what's happening. 08:54 Right. 08:55 But it puts you in a place where you feel like, 08:57 "I'm on clearance. 08:58 I'm marked down. 09:00 I'm reduced. 09:01 For some reason, 09:03 God has counted me out 09:04 or my friends have counted me out." 09:07 And some women, 09:08 even shred just thinking that their husbands 09:10 have counted them out. 09:12 So what I want individuals to know 09:16 is that you're not on clearance. 09:17 Yes. 09:19 You are bought with a price. 09:21 Even and especially during difficult times, 09:24 you can have the favor of God. 09:26 Yes. 09:27 And this is why it says on the front of my book, 09:29 "Why the favor of God 09:31 is yours especially during difficult times." 09:37 How did you come to know 09:39 that the favor of God was on you? 09:44 By allowing the Holy Spirit to transform my mind. 09:48 And I would say that takes me to chapter three in the book, 09:52 it's called, "Beyond The Toner." 09:55 As you know, Yvonne, us ladies, we like to look beautiful, 09:58 and so we would easily do a facial cleansing, 10:01 cleanse your face 10:03 and then you put on your toner, and you're done. 10:06 So many times, in our Christian life, 10:08 that's what we do. 10:09 We just accept the initial cleansing, 10:11 we get baptized, we put on a little toner, 10:14 we learn the 27 or 28 beliefs 10:17 of the Seventh-day Adventist, and we're done. 10:21 I found out that I had to go beyond the toner. 10:24 Come on. 10:25 I really needed God to show me that You are God. 10:30 I need the Holy Spirit. 10:33 I said, "God, I need transformation," 10:35 because, doing all that, God was telling me to stay. 10:38 You needed for God to show you that He is God. 10:41 That He is God. 10:42 Yes. Yes. 10:44 And that He is my rock 10:45 because my whole foundation had fallen. 10:48 This is 19 years of marriage and 19 years of preaching. 10:54 So I had to go beyond the toner, 10:58 which means I needed to know the Holy Spirit 11:02 in the way that God wanted me to know. 11:04 I grew up as a Primitive Baptist. 11:07 I became an Adventist my senior year in college. 11:11 In the Baptist Church, 11:12 we used to sing this song about the Holy Spirit, 11:14 and it says, "He will do what no other power can do." 11:19 And that's what I needed God to do. 11:21 I said, "God, give me Your mind 11:25 because I don't have the mindset 11:27 that You don't have." 11:28 I don't have a loving mind, I didn't know how to forgive. 11:33 How do you even think of forgiving at that level, 11:39 especially when there are so many things 11:40 that are unanswered 11:42 and that you're never going to get answers to? 11:45 I didn't know how to stay. 11:48 There was no book that I could go and read. 11:52 I went looking for books but nothing talked about 11:55 my situation. 11:57 And I did not know 11:58 a Seventh-day Adventist Christian woman 12:02 whose husband had had outside children 12:06 and a long relationship, who had stayed... 12:10 You know, I just didn't know where are the steps. 12:12 Right. Right. 12:13 Like, what do we do. Right. 12:15 And so that also was a trial when people tried to console me 12:21 or tried to say, 12:22 "You need to do this and you need to do that." 12:24 I wanted an example. So I had to go beyond. 12:27 You wanted somebody who had been there. 12:29 That's what I wanted. Yeah. 12:31 And today, I still have not found that. 12:33 But I pray that my life and my story 12:36 and my book will say to that person, 12:39 be it a man or woman, 12:41 who is going through something very detrimental, 12:44 that you are not on clearance... 12:45 That's right. 12:46 That the favor of God can still be yours. 12:49 You have to understand, I thought God was leaving me. 12:52 I thought His favor was gone. 12:56 I thought there's no way 12:57 that you have chosen me and then, for a while, 13:02 I was comparing myself with that other person, 13:05 like you chose this person over me. 13:09 So there were so many stages, 13:11 but chapter three talks about that transformation. 13:15 See, we can have spiritual information, 13:19 spiritual education, but we need a transformation. 13:24 That's right. 13:25 And that's what I hope my book brings about. 13:27 I hope it gives a person a new way of thinking to know 13:33 that God loves you no matter what. 13:35 Yeah. 13:37 And if you allow Him, He will bring you through it, 13:40 and God did that for me and my husband. 13:44 We're married now going on 35 years. 13:46 Praise the Lord. 13:48 And it's ongoing stages. 13:50 It's always ongoing. 13:51 They're different layers, you know? 13:53 Yes. Yes. 13:54 And some of us, 13:56 because of the sin in our lives 13:58 that we allowed ourselves to get into, 14:01 for the rest of your life, there will be layers. 14:05 There will be different things that the Holy Spirit 14:07 will continuously peel back 14:09 and peel off of you so that you can make it. 14:12 But just note, you're not on clearance. 14:15 God will always be doing something new in your life. 14:18 That's right. 14:20 That's what I love. 14:21 I'm always challenging God. 14:23 I'm like, "God, let's do something new." 14:24 Yeah. 14:25 And He promises to do something new. 14:27 Yes. He does. 14:28 He promises to do something new. 14:29 This is, you know, 14:31 a new work in us 14:32 because He's constantly working on us. 14:35 Right. 14:36 And I was afraid of what God was going to do. 14:40 I felt like nobody can love pastors, 14:43 so I had that fear. 14:45 But chapter three talks about as I say, 14:47 Going Beyond the Toner, 14:49 and let's get the microdermabrasion cleanser 14:51 to go on on your face. 14:53 Let's put on that charcoal mask. 14:56 A deep cleaning. 14:57 Let the Spirit really get in there and deal 14:59 with those dead cells 15:01 and the roots of sin and the root of your pain. 15:06 I had such serious pain that even my counselor, 15:10 my therapist, and attorneys, 15:12 and the different layers of people 15:14 that had to come in and assist my family. 15:17 All of them said, 15:18 "We've never had a case like this." 15:22 So I needed God to go beyond the toner with me 15:26 and He did that. 15:27 So, 15:28 you know, I just want that person to know that, 15:31 "Don't give up on God. 15:33 Don't give up on God." 15:34 This is a very important point 15:36 because these kinds of situations 15:38 either pull you away from God... 15:40 Absolutely. 15:42 Or draw you to Him. Yes. 15:43 And what you're saying is that, for a while, 15:46 you had some confusion 15:47 about God's role in allowing this 15:51 to happen to you. 15:53 Yes. 15:54 Even to the point where you were thinking 15:56 that God had chosen the other person, 16:00 the other woman over you. 16:02 Absolutely. 16:04 And then you realized that, "No, actually, 16:07 that relationship was under a curse 16:10 because yours was sanctioned by God." 16:12 Yes. 16:13 And so, you know, 16:15 when you look at where you were, 16:18 you see that God brought you from that place of confusion 16:22 because He's not the author of confusion. 16:24 Absolutely. 16:26 Brought you from that place 16:27 into a place of harmony with Him. 16:31 And He creates triumph from tragedy. 16:35 Yes, He does. 16:37 He does that. 16:38 He brings you through when you're going through 16:41 the darkest time. 16:42 I've been through the darkest times too 16:45 over the course of my life. 16:47 And I know that each situation, in every situation, 16:51 God has brought me through. 16:53 He's a faithful God. 16:55 He will not let us down. 16:56 Even though, sometimes, 16:58 you're in that wilderness as you were. 17:00 That's right. 17:02 But God brought you through. Yes. 17:04 You're in that wilderness. 17:05 So go beyond the toner. Right. 17:07 Okay, what's next? 17:08 Go beyond the toner. Go beyond it. 17:10 Which means you are there allowing 17:12 the Holy Spirit to do what He wants to do. 17:13 That's right. That's right. 17:16 And trust me, God can do it. 17:18 That's right. 17:19 That's right. 17:21 Another chapter I would like to point out is chapter five. 17:23 It talks about "Loosing the belly fat." 17:25 Okay. 17:26 Once again, as I... I can relate. 17:28 Yes, as I wrote each chapter, I wanted women to relate. 17:32 Right. 17:33 And I know how we're always concerned 17:35 about our figure, our shape, you know, the belly fat. 17:36 Yes, yes. 17:38 But now that relates to men also. 17:40 You know, men go to the gym, they work out, 17:42 you know, they want all this buff... 17:43 Right. They want to trim, get those abs, that six pack. 17:45 Absolutely. 17:47 So this chapter is for both men and women. 17:50 But the belly fat is representative of the lies 17:54 of the devil because, 17:57 you know, you think about when you're expecting 17:59 and how the belly grows and the doctor is measuring it 18:03 and all of that. 18:04 But the promise is in Jeremiah 1:5, 18:07 where God says, 18:08 "Before I formed thee and placed thee in the belly, 18:13 I knew thee." 18:15 This verse became so critical to me 18:18 because I was basing God 18:20 and my relationship with Him on what happened 18:24 in this particular year, 18:25 in this particular age of my life. 18:27 But God reminded me 18:29 that "Before the belly, Vivian..." 18:33 It doesn't matter, the belly. 18:35 "Before the belly, before you were formed, 18:39 before I placed you in the belly, 18:42 I knew you, I ordained you, 18:45 I chose you for favor, girl, 18:47 how dare that you let this 18:50 determine My feelings for you?" 18:53 Yeah. 18:54 And so I called that loosing the belly fat 18:56 because when you're going through a trial 18:59 and you're weighing God versus Satan, 19:02 Satan is there lying to you. 19:05 He's telling you lies. 19:06 He's telling you all the reasons 19:08 why you aren't favored, 19:10 all the reasons why God won't pull your family up 19:13 and give you a new start. 19:15 And you have to resist those lies. 19:18 Those lies are just like fat lying around your belly. 19:21 So that's why I call it "Lose the Belly Fat." 19:24 Here are some things that women believe. 19:26 And this is in chapter five. 19:29 Some believe that God cannot bless 19:31 and use them due to circumstances 19:33 that may have occurred. 19:35 Perhaps, she was adopted or your mother was on drugs 19:39 and alcohol, their mother was a lesbian, 19:43 maybe your mother was infected with a disease. 19:46 These are all the reasons that women come to church, 19:50 yet they do not believe that the favor of God 19:54 is upon them 19:56 because you never got to know your mother, 19:58 because your mother was involved in an affair 20:01 when she had you, 20:03 because one of your parents is a convicted felon, 20:07 you know, your dad is incarcerated, 20:09 and the list just goes on and on and on. 20:13 But these are lies of the enemy. 20:15 These are just like fat around your belly. 20:17 Yeah. 20:18 So that's why I named that chapter, 20:20 "Lose the Belly Fat." 20:21 Yes. 20:23 You have to immerse yourself in the word of God 20:25 and find those promises of God. 20:28 Yes. 20:29 And when God said to me, "Vivian, 20:31 before you were even formed, I loved you..." 20:34 Yes. "I blessed you..." 20:35 Yes. 20:37 "I chose you, I called you." 20:38 That's right. God said, "I'm sorry. 20:40 I know your tears. 20:42 I see you weeping. 20:44 But don't you dare think that I'm finished with you." 20:46 Yes. 20:48 Yes, 'cause He is not finished yet. 20:49 That was so beautiful. 20:51 That is so beautiful. 20:52 It really is. 20:53 It just speaks of the loving, caring, 20:57 compassionate God that He is. 21:00 You know, Satan wants to distort our perception 21:04 of the character of God. 21:05 Right. 21:07 He wants us to think that God is not loving, 21:09 that He doesn't care, that He puts you here, 21:11 and you're kind of on your own. 21:12 No, no, no, no, no. 21:14 Before... 21:15 Before... 21:17 Before... 21:18 So that's ask before anything. 21:20 He knew before you were even formed... 21:23 Right. 21:24 In the womb. He knew you. 21:26 He knew us. 21:27 It's incredible. 21:29 And He already determined then that, "I love you." 21:32 That's right. "That I have a place for you." 21:33 That's right. 21:35 And a plan. 21:36 And a plan. 21:38 A plan for you. 21:39 We always talk about... 21:40 On Urban Report, 21:42 we always talk about the fact that God has a plan 21:43 and the enemy has a plan. 21:45 Absolutely. 21:46 And God's plan is to give you an abundant life 21:50 and to bring you up. 21:52 That's right. 21:54 And Satan's plan is to destroy you 21:56 and bring you down. 21:57 And they each have a system, a way, 22:01 a plan to bring you to that point 22:03 of either height or depth. 22:04 Right. 22:06 Depending on, you know, who you choose to serve. 22:09 So what you're saying is that you... 22:13 That verse, for you, in Jeremiah, 22:17 that was pivotal for you. 22:19 It was pivotal 22:20 because I kept looking at the belly. 22:23 I kept looking at the circumstance 22:25 and here's the reason 22:26 why I can never be favored in You, God. 22:30 But God was like, "It doesn't matter the belly." 22:33 It's almost like certain countries 22:36 privilege themselves if you're born 22:37 to a certain tribe or a certain royal family. 22:41 But God is saying, 22:43 "None of that matters because before you were formed, 22:46 before you ended up in that belly 22:49 where maybe the uncle raped the cousin..." 22:54 It's just so many things that Satan keeps 22:56 bringing that lie before us 22:58 and he still brings it before me. 23:01 And so constantly, daily, 23:02 I'm quoting the promises of God. 23:04 Yes. 23:05 I'm quoting the promises of God. 23:07 And that's what we have to do is lose the belly fat. 23:08 Yes. 23:10 Just like every so many months, we realize, like, "Hey, 23:12 I'm getting a little heavy here, 23:13 something is not right." 23:15 We have to do that spiritually and say, "Hey, wait a minute. 23:18 I'm getting a little heavy in my life, 23:20 my burdens are getting heavy, I'm getting torn down. 23:23 I need to lose the belly fat." 23:25 That's good. You know? 23:26 That's good. I love it. 23:28 Yeah. I love it. 23:29 Yeah, I need to lose the lies that Satan is telling me 23:30 and just begin to jot down the lies that he's telling you 23:34 and why you can't move forward 23:36 and why you can't do this and that. 23:37 Yes. 23:39 And this book is actually a seven-week program, isn't it? 23:42 Yes. 23:43 That's what it's designed to be is a seven-week journey 23:45 of spiritual transformation. 23:47 There are seven chapters. 23:49 And so my goal was that you would read 23:53 one chapter, 23:54 each chapter also gives some challenging questions, 23:57 and then you can journal, write down your answers. 24:01 But here's the feedback that I've gotten 24:03 since I've written the book. 24:05 What I'm getting is that, most people, 24:07 when they get the book, it's an easy read, 24:10 a quick read, so they read it through the first time. 24:13 Yeah. 24:14 And they love it. 24:15 And then they go back and start doing the journaling 24:19 and they're really seeking God for the transformation 24:23 or they'll choose a chapter that they want to start with 24:27 because that's where you're going to get the benefit 24:29 is when you actually answer these questions. 24:31 Yes. 24:32 And you take a look at your life and ask God, 24:35 "God, move me from the clearance aisle." 24:37 It's so easy to get stuck on that aisle 24:41 and you don't realize you're on the clearance aisle 24:43 until you just take a look around 24:45 and see how much negativity is around you. 24:48 Yes. Yes. 24:49 Take 30 seconds if you would and look into this camera 24:53 and tell that woman or that man 24:56 who's going through a really dark time 24:59 how they can just move from the clearance aisle. 25:03 Well, I would like to say that you are bought 25:05 with a price 25:07 and God has worked it out for you 25:09 before you were even born, 25:12 before the situation came upon you. 25:14 It's almost like one of the chapters 25:16 that says "Nails Done". 25:18 Because Christ has gone to the cross and died for us 25:22 and He was nailed to the cross, it's done. 25:24 Your situation is taken care of. 25:27 But you have to accept God's favor 25:31 and allow Him to continue pointing in your life. 25:34 And keep this in mind, you might be the Bible, 25:39 the answered prayer, 25:40 or the example that God wants someone else to see. 25:45 I can remember asking God, "Where is my example? 25:48 Who do I turn to? 25:50 I don't know how to walk in favor after this." 25:54 And God just took me by the hand and He said, 25:57 "If you allow Me to hold your hand 26:00 and you walk with Me, we'll do this together." 26:03 Amen. 26:04 Thank you so much, Sister Vivian. 26:07 What a blessing. 26:08 What a blessing you are 26:09 and you are to others who are going through 26:13 what you went through. 26:14 I pray. 26:16 So thank you so much 26:17 and thank you for being with us. 26:18 Yes. 26:20 And we're thankful that the Lord has restored 26:21 your marriage. 26:23 God is so good. 26:24 He is so good. He's awesome. 26:26 Know that God has a plan 26:28 for you and that He can bring you 26:31 from tragedy to triumph. 26:33 Well, I can't believe it. 26:34 We've reached the end of another program. 26:36 Join us next time 'cause you know what? 26:38 It just wouldn't be the same without you. |
Revised 2024-06-10