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Series Code: BOLS
Program Code: BOLS000049S
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00:06 Sermon #S026 - I'll Take it From Here - (Part 2)
00:20 Welcome to The Breath of Life Television Ministries broadcast with Pastor Debleaire Snell. 00:25 In today's episode, Pastor Snell will share Part Two of the dynamic message titled "I'll Take It From Here." 00:33 Now let's go deeper into the Word of God to understand his plan for our family. 00:40 Pastor Snell: See? This is why young people I need you to get that the call to abstinence is not restrictive. It's protective. 00:49 [Congregation: Clapping] 00:51 Oh, God. I thought I would get one witness in the Church of the Living God that the call to abstinence is not restrictive. 00:58 It is protective. In other words, because the act itself, hear me, is an act of covenant. 01:06 In other words, when you engage it is more than the exchange of body and fluid, there is a soul interface, 01:14 there is a spirit mixing that is going to bind you permanently to someone that might not even be there next week. 01:22 Are you all hearing what I'm saying? 01:24 And see, what the devil's going to try to convince you is that now it's just physical, 01:28 it don't mean nothing but how many of us know that our spiritual 01:31 and our physical are so interwoven that the two cannot be compartmentalized? 01:38 [Congregation: Clapping] 01:40 [Congregation: Amen] 01:42 The two operate with such oneness that when my soul is hurting guess what? My body starts crying. 01:47 That when my soul is stressed, guess what? My blood pressure goes up, my breathing becomes irregular, my heartbeat goes up. 01:54 Why? Because whatever touches my soul is going to touch my body 01:58 and whatever touches my body is going to also touch my soul so you can't touch one without the other. 02:06 [Congregation: Cheering] 02:07 [Congregation: Clapping] 02:09 Are you all hearing what I'm saying? And see, I need you to get that. That's why in 1 Corinthians 6. 02:13 Have you ever noticed that Paul says that "Every other sin is the sin outside of the body, 02:19 but fornication is a sin against your own body." In other words, when you lie and you steal, 02:26 you hurt somebody else, but when you fornicate the word says "You bring pain and destruction to yourself." 02:33 [Congregation: Amen] 02:34 And that's why there is no such thing as safe sex. 02:37 [Congregation: Clapping] 02:42 That only applies if you think the greatest consequence is an STD or pregnancy. 02:50 But do you realize that there is an emotional brokenness that happens when you bond yourself in a permanent way to somebody 03:00 that's not going to be there next week? See the danger? The reason the church can't stop preaching this, 03:06 is because if we do, we start endorsing our brokenness. 03:12 [Congregation: Clapping] 03:14 And see the problem with the behavior is that your spirit or your body is making a covenant that your spirit cannot handle. 03:22 [Congregation: Clapping] 03:24 That's why I can't be done casually. You got to be in covenant. Somebody say in covenant. 03:28 [Congregation: In covenant] 03:30 You got to be in a relationship. It's for married folk. Are you all hearing the word today, friends? 03:33 [Congregation: Amen] 03:36 As I remember my very last month or two at Andrews, I had some previous roommates that I was living with but then Neil, 03:41 about two months before graduation. I exchanged roommates and I had two roommates that moved in and so 03:46 because I had been in the apartment the longest, the phone bill was in my name. 03:52 Do you all remember back in the day when long-distance was an additional charge? 03:57 [Congregation: Amen] 04:00 Come on, you all remember? Okay, Amen. And it's crazy because I lived only in the house for a month or two together. 04:05 So what I don't require is I don't require them to put their name on the bill. 04:13 I allowed them to have service with the phone, without being in the contract. Do you all hear me? 04:21 And so all of us calling our mamas and daddies, all of us calling our girlfriends from out of town, 04:27 all of us calling our friends from back in the day. But guess what? When that last month's bill is due 04:33 and everybody's moving out of the house, guess what? Everybody wants to walk away, why? 04:38 Because there was only one name on the contract. 04:42 And see? The problem is, I allowed them to get service without signing their names on the dotted line. 04:48 And what I'm saying to somebody today, don't let them get service. 04:52 [Congregation: Clapping] 04:53 [Congregation: Cheering] 04:55 If there is no contract, no covenant, don't let them walk away without being committed. 05:02 [Congregation: Cheering] 05:04 The old folks would say "Why buy the cow?" Yall mighty quiet 05:08 [Congregation: Clapping] 05:12 [Congregation: Cheering] 05:19 The third thing this teaches, friends of mine, and what the adults to hear me on this? 05:25 Is that sometimes your freedom comes at the expense of the children's bondage. 05:34 [Congregation: amen] 05:39 See? Things have reached a tipping point between Hagar and Sarai. 05:46 See, once Isaac is born, I need you to get to by the time Isaac is weaned and a festival is thrown, 05:53 this literally pushes your boy Ishmael into a place of trauma so much so that he 05:59 and his mother begin to mock Sarai and Isaac essentially exposing the truth that as the oldest one, 06:07 I am the heir to the birthright and understand your girl Sarai ain't having this no more, she's making it clear to Hagar 06:16 that you ain't got to go home. But you going to have to get on up out of here. 06:20 And it's crazy because she steps to Abraham with no negotiation in her voice. 06:26 She's making it clear. It's going to be her or it's going to be me. 06:30 And the thing I need somebody to get is that Abraham is at a point where he can't manage this. 06:35 He can't appease it. He cannot hold it together. Understand your boy Abraham is a hundred-some years old. 06:42 He is too old to be dealing with baby mama drama. All your boy Abraham wants is some peace 06:48 and this thing is not about a lack of love for his son, Ishmael. 06:53 Abraham's got to do what he's got to do to maintain some peace in his house. 06:59 In other words, the rejection of Ishmael is not about the child. It's about the immaturity of the adults. 07:09 [Congregation: Clapping] 07:10 [Congregation: Cheering] 07:11 And let me just say to some of the Ishmaels in the room that did not have Mom or Dad around. 07:16 If they walked out who please hear me? I need you to know. It's not on you. 07:24 [Congregation: Amen] 07:28 See? There are some Ishmaels that have been carrying this unnecessary baggage and weight. 07:33 Because what the voice of abandonment says it says, "You're not good enough." 07:38 It says, "If you had only behaved. " It says that "You're the reason and the problem." 07:44 It says that "If you had acted better, somehow things would have worked out a little bit differently." 07:51 But my prayer is to set some Ishmael's free. 07:54 Don't blame yourself if Mom or Dad did not stick around, don't blame yourself because you had to be raised in foster care. 08:02 Don't blame yourself if Mom and Dad could not stay married. In fact, sometimes God, 08:08 in wisdom had to push one or two parents outside of the door, because they were not worthy to be stewards of your gifts, 08:17 and your talents, and your potential. And even though they had to leave, I need you to know we serve a God that says, 08:26 I'll take it from here. 08:28 [Congregation: Clapping] 08:30 [Congregation: Amen] 08:33 See? There are no illegitimate kids. 08:37 There are just illegitimate parents that are not worthy to oversee what has been gifted to them. 08:46 [Congregation: Clapping] 08:47 [Congregation: Amen] 08:50 Can you all imagine, friends of mine? Just stay with me. How traumatic your boy Ishmael's life must have been? 08:59 You see every time a family functions outside of God's design, it brings harm to the children. He adores his father. 09:08 He literally hangs on every word that his father speaks. When he looks in his father's face, 09:14 he gets a glimpse of what he shall one day look like and what he shall one day become. His sense of identity, 09:20 his sense of self hinges on his father's approval. But I need you to get friends of mine, 09:25 how traumatic it is for Ishmael to see his daddy showing preference to another woman outside of his mother. 09:33 Do you realize how hard it is for Ishmael to have to go and visit his daddy with his new family? 09:42 It's traumatic when his brother is born and it should be a matter of family celebration, 09:48 but the birth of the new child literally makes his life completely irrelevant at this time. 09:56 And see friends, I need you to embrace the trauma of this moment. As man, God has given this very harsh word to Abraham. 10:04 He says "Listen, Abraham, this is not going to work, you going to have to send the bondwoman away." 10:09 Can you feel what it must be like to be Ishmael when he sees Abraham and his mother having that conversation? 10:17 When he sees his dad put a water bottle and a loaf of bread in his hand and he pushes them on the outskirts of the camp? 10:27 And I can imagine your boy Ishmael as he's looking over his shoulder thinking that somehow it's a joke. 10:33 He's looking over his shoulder assuming that at some point, Daddy's going to change his mind. 10:39 He's looking over his shoulder assuming that somehow it's going to get better. 10:43 Can you imagine what Ishmael is like as he lays in the desert? When all the bread is gone and all the water is gone 10:51 and he is lying there on the precipice of death. He holds out hope that any moment, Dad is going to show up. 10:58 Any moment, Dad is going to come to the rescue. Any moment, Dad is going to come and see about me. 11:03 But eventually, that disappointment creates a rage and that rage that even starts out hunting him. 11:11 It eventually impanels him and it ultimately defines who he will become. 11:18 Notice what God said about Ishmael. The Bible literally says, God said to his mama, he says "He's going to be a wild man. 11:26 He's going to be against every man. Hence every man is going to be against him. 11:30 And I need you to know that God is not articulating his plan. He has prophesied what the results will be of Abraham 11:39 and Sarah's treachery. He's saying he's going to struggle with self-esteem. He's going to struggle with his emotions. 11:45 He's going to struggle with his feelings. He's going to struggle communicating. He's going to be volatile. 11:52 He's going to have outbursts, it's going to look bad. But even though it looks crazy, I want you to know Hagar, 11:58 I'm not going to leave you by yourself. I'm going to take it from here." 12:05 And see friends. I need us to get that fatherlessness or parental abandonment on either side comes with certain fruit. 12:15 See, one of those fruit is anger. Somebody say anger. 12:18 [Congregation: Anger] 12:20 See, the problem is we think that just because a child is not loud or boisterous that they are not anger. 12:25 How many of us know the anger can be silent? And the anger can lie right dormant under the surface of a child. 12:35 And guess what? It matures along with their puberty. So that as they get facial hair, and as they develop curves 12:42 and as they develop muscles, guess what? The anger matures simultaneously 12:47 and it's crazy when they begin to have outbursts as adults. 12:51 We think something has all of a sudden changed. 12:53 No, something did not just shift that simply which has been under the surface has finally broke free. 13:01 One of the things that happens when there's abandonment is boys and girls who have abandonment, 13:07 they struggle with broken relationships. There's a sense of abandonment. that brings you to extremes. 13:13 There are some, because they've been hurt and disappointed by abandonment. 13:17 They'll put up such walls that they won't allow anybody to get close with them. 13:22 And they will struggle with intimacy, or they will struggle with all human interaction. 13:27 But there's another extreme to abandonment. Because when you've been abandoned, 13:32 you'll have one so bad just to have somebody in your life that you will hold on even to those that don't treat you well. 13:41 [Congregation: Amen] 13:43 So they are cheating on you and yet you will stay. They talk down to you and you'll still stay. 13:48 They even knock you upside your head and yet you'll stay. 13:52 Why? Because you're just so desperate to have somebody that you will put up with anything. 14:00 Can I say fathers, that's why we got to stay present. 14:03 Our daughters need to not have to deal with that. Are you all hearing what I'm saying today? 14:09 [Congregation: Amen] 14:10 [Congregation: Clapping] 14:12 I want to be there for my daughter so that anybody that's a suitor down the line knows that they got big shoes to fill. 14:17 [Congregation: Amen] 14:18 [Congregation: Clapping] 14:20 Can I get a witness? I need that to be a standard that she's looking at and I want you to be clear. 14:24 I want her to be a nice person. I want her to be a kind person. I want her to embrace all people, 14:28 but when it comes down to dating, I want her to be just a little bit uppity. 14:32 [Congregation: Amen] 14:33 [Congregation: Clapping] 14:34 I want her to be hard to impress. Do I have a witness? 14:37 I don't want her to be some easily impressed chicken head that gets excited because somebody took her to Taco Bell. 14:44 Are you all hearing what I'm saying? There is a standard that's been set by her daddy 14:48 and her granddaddy where you got to step with something in order to get something. Are you all hearing what I'm saying? 14:55 In other words, she had not to be impressed cause you got a job. You are supposed to have a job. 15:01 You shouldn't be impressed cause they got a degree. They are supposed to have that. 15:05 You shouldn't be impressed because they took you out to dinner. Your Daddy had been doing that your whole life. 15:10 Are you all hearing what I'm saying? 15:11 [Congregation: Clapping] 15:13 See, the problem is because Daddy's ain't there, they are treating basics like bonuses. 15:20 Stop treating them seat on the floor like the ceiling. But is there any ladies that has realize that you are a virtuous woman? 15:28 That your value is high above rubies? That you ain't cheap? That you are fearfully and wonderfully made? 15:34 You are a child of the king? You are God's workmanship. 15:40 [Congregation: Clapping] 15:43 Are you all hearing what I'm saying? 15:45 [Congregation: Clapping] 15:47 Don't be afraid to play hard to get. Don't answer the phone, every time. Where yall at?. 15:53 Every now and then, brothers like a chase. We want something you have to work for 16:00 because if he ain't got to work to get you, he ain't going to work to keep you. Am I preaching anybody today? 16:09 [Congregation: Amen] 16:10 [Congregation: Clapping] 16:13 If you got to ask him for the first date and the second date, and the third date, 16:18 and you got to pick him up and you got to pay. Come on. There are to come on now. Listen, 16:23 I'm married and my wife still make me pay when we go out. Listen, it's crazy. 16:34 Hey Malcolm, the server will come out and put the little bill right in the middle of the table. 16:40 And I'm looking to see if she's gonna get it. She, looking like, "You asked me out." I'm like, "Baby, 16:47 it's coming from the same account." Are you all hearing what I'm saying? 16:51 But make him work. Are you all hearing the word? 16:55 [Congregation: Amen] 16:59 When there is abandonment, there is a struggle with emotional development and identity. 17:07 You see some of the things that we struggle with is their inability to handle things like rejection. 17:13 Because a daddy is supposed to be there to help a boy the first time a girl says, "I don't like you." 17:19 Mom and dad is supposed to be there, to teach him how to handle bullying. 17:23 Mom and dad are supposed to be there to teach them what happens when you fail, 17:26 when you don't make the team, when you don't get the grade and things don't play out the way that you should. 17:30 Do you realize the basic things of life our kids are having to figure out through trial and error? 17:39 And you realize friends that God has set this thing up where kid is supposed to be covered by Mom and Dad. 17:46 Two parents on both sides. Are you all hearing what I'm saying, church? See, that's why we cannot, help me say it right, 17:54 let certain things become too commonplace. We've got to maintain a standard. If nowhere else in the house of God. 18:04 Why? Am I telling the truth? Parenting is a job for two people. 18:12 [Congregation: Amen] 18:13 [Congregation: Clapping] 18:16 It's crazy at times where I'll see a young lady with two or three or four kids. 18:20 It's great to have to catch myself cuz sometimes in my spirit, I just be shaking my head. 18:25 And I'm not shaking my head out of judgment because of what has happened to her having to babysit some of the issues. 18:30 It's because I know how hard parenting is. And I grieve that she's gonna have to do that much by herself. 18:40 Listen, I got a wife and my parents live around the corner. This joint is a job for a whole village. 18:46 Are you all hearing what I'm saying? 18:48 [Congregation: Clapping] 18:50 So let us stop judging the single mom or the dad. And let's put our hands on the plow and be an aid. 18:58 Let's be an asset. Let's be an encourager. Don't spend no time asking why she got all them kids. 19:05 She got them now that ain't no time to be asking that question. 19:09 Be a mentor, be a shadow, be a covering. 19:13 [Congregation: Amen] 19:14 [Congregation: Clapping] 19:15 Are you all hearing what I'm saying? 19:17 [Congregation: Amen] 19:19 It's a job for two people. Why? Because you realize that male and female, the Bible says "Create the image of God." 19:29 [Congregation: Amen] 19:33 It's a job for two people. Why do you keep saying that, Pastor? 19:37 Because you realize that it is in the union that a child gets completely covered. 19:41 [Congregation: Amen] 19:43 Because even in relationships you realize opposites attract. So from one parent, 19:48 they're going to learn how to work hard. From the other parent, they are going to learn how to relax. 19:51 From one parent, they can learn how to take everything serious. From the other parent, 19:54 they are going to learn how to not take life so seriously. Do you realize in a marriage one parent is going to be the law? 20:00 The other parent is going to be grace and together the image of God is completed in the life. 20:06 [Congregation: Clapping] 20:08 And see this is how God set this thing up. So that individually, my last name is Snell, my wife's maiden name is Norman. 20:15 So that when we got married, I bought some Snell crazy. 20:18 [Congregation: amen] 20:21 She bought just a little bit, just a little bit. Just a little bit, Amen. Maybe just a little bit of Norman crazy. 20:32 But do you realize how God set it up that through my exposure to her, guess what? Some of that Snell crazy gets diluted. 20:40 And through her exposure to me, some of the Norman stuff gets diluted. So that through exposure to one another, 20:46 they get our stress. But guess what? The crazy is supposed to be filtered out 20:52 because it is filtered through the relationship between Mom and Dad. 20:56 But guess what? When there is only one in the place, guess what? You get some of my stress. But to get all my crazy 21:04 [Congregation: Clapping] 21:06 Are you all hearing what I'm saying? 21:09 [Congregation: Amen] 21:11 What I'm saying to somebody today is that before you walk out that door, think about what your freedom is going to cost them. 21:18 Before you leave your post, think about brother, the cost that they will have to pay. Before you sign the divorce papers, 21:31 before you go and see the judge, before you decide to move to another city, 21:37 because the commute is going to pay a little bit better. Before you decide to hurry up and remarry. 21:43 You need to give some consideration about what is going to happen to the offspring that are left behind. 21:49 And my conviction is this, is that children are not supposed to suffer for the wellness of the parents, 21:56 but parents are supposed to 21:57 to suffer for the wholeness of the kids. 22:01 [Congregation: Clapping] 22:03 [Congregation: Amen] 22:08 Yes. It's going to be quiet in here . 22:12 Do you realize what it does to a girl when she has to see you showing affection to somebody besides her mom? 22:21 Do you realize that boys are not supposed to see their mother's date? 22:26 [Congregation: Amen] 22:31 Do you realize what it does to them? To see you with your new family? See? The problem is we just want them to adjust. 22:38 We want them to get over it. Oh, they're just kids gonna be kids and we don't even realize what we are setting in motion. 22:44 [Congregation: Amen] 22:46 That's why God shows up in the middle of a desert, right when Ishmael is about to take his last breath 22:56 and God steps into that space. And he says to that Ishmael the same thing that he says to the Ishmael's in our time. 23:04 He wants you to be clear that even if they did not want you, he says, "I still want you." Even if they didn't see your value, 23:12 he wants you to know. "I see your value." You may not have had the best upbringing. 23:17 You might not have had the most righteous start 23:19 but I need you to know that we serve the God that says "All things work together." 23:25 Sew good to them who love the Lord and are called according to his purpose. And God says, "I'll take it from here." 23:33 [Congregation: Amen] 23:34 [Congregation: Clapping] 23:38 Can I say to the single moms quickly? I need you to know Hagar, that God sees you. 23:47 He hears your prayers, he sees your tears, he sees your lamentations, 23:56 and notice what happened in the story that when she thought the child was about to die, 24:01 she stood far enough away because she can't handle him seeing breathing his last breath. 24:07 Notice that He says "Hagar, what ails you, 24:10 I've already made you a promise 15 years ago that I'm going to make of him a great nation." 24:16 And even though she didn't think that there was water already there, He just said, "Open up your eyes again." 24:24 And when she opened up her eyes she didn't realize that a well was right there waiting to supply all of her needs. 24:33 What I'm saying to the single mom is when they don't pay child support, when they don't send the alimony. 24:40 When they don't do their part, God has already parked you next to a well so that you and your family will lack no good thing, 24:49 my God shall supply all your needs according to his riches and glory. 24:56 [Congregation: Amen] 24:57 [Congregation: Clapping] 25:01 And see, that's some of you all will step into my office and say, "Well, Pastor, I just decided I didn't want to draw my anger. 25:06 I'll make him pay child support. The Devil is a liar. That's the least he can do. 25:11 [Congregation: Clapping] 25:13 And some of you all brothers you all be tripping. 25:18 "Well, that's how I take care of my responsibilities. I pay child support." You know what? 25:23 I'd be saying that stuff as if I'm about to give them props for it. 25:27 If all you do is write that $700 check, you got off easy. 25:32 When the real dads, they have to get up early to have to stay up late to have to help with homework. 25:37 They have to pay tuition and you have to make the financial investment. You ain't getting no grace over here. 25:45 [Congregation: Clapping] 25:53 Well, you should be using money and get your hair done and pedicure. Well, that's the least you can do. 26:00 She had to get a massage and a new car. Are you all hearing what I'm saying? 26:04 [Congregation: Clapping] 26:08 [Congregation: Amen] 26:15 I'm calling the men to recognize your basic and that ain't no bonus. 26:25 But I love the promise he gives. He says, "I'm going to make of Ishmael a great nation." 26:40 See? Sometimes we are so busy living with anger because they left. 26:47 Stay with me, kids. Do you realize God says, "Because of what I want to do in Ishmael, 26:57 I've got to get him out of Abraham's house." Oh, God. 27:03 [Congregation: Clapping] 27:05 In other words, Abraham and Sarah are not worthy to oversee what I'm putting inside of you. 27:11 Oh, God, are you all hearing the word today? In other words, in Abraham's house, you'll always be second best. 27:18 You will always be the other child. In that house, you'll never be able to become the great nation. 27:24 So what I've got to do is I've got to remove you from a situation that's going to smother your potential 27:31 and somebody's always asking why didn't they stay. 27:35 But maybe what you should be asking of what would have happened if they had just remained. 27:40 But sometimes God is so awesome that he literally removes you from situations that were being so toxic that if Mama had stayed, 27:51 if Daddy had stayed, you would have seen it on first-hand witness of abuse and pathology, and sickness, 27:59 and cycles that would make you worse than what you are right now. 28:04 But the reason you've made it as far as you've made it, 28:08 is because God saved you and removed from you that which what damage you. 28:16 [Congregation: Clapping] 28:19 (Breath of Life Theme Music) 28:42 [END] |
Revised 2023-01-10